Chapter 37
“That’s just gross.” Xander said eying the red thick liquid in the glass container of the coffee maker.
“Then don’t look,” Cordelia said.
“How are we supposed to have coffee in that ever again?”
“Soap and water.”
“Why can’t he just drink it cold?”
“Because it’s better warm. Why isn’t there a microwave here?”
“Because it’s a store not a kitchen.”
“Hmmph,” Cordelia poured a cup of blood in a mug. “Angel needs to eat, too.”
“That’s the type of eating that should be done in the privacy of a coffin.”
Cordelia eyed the cheese dripping from Xander’s face. “So should your type, pizza face” shoving a napkin at the young man.
“Uh.”
Buffy nibbled on her slice of pizza watching Xander and Cordelia’s exchange. Her eyes followed the dark haired young woman as Cordy gave Angel the mug of blood. Buffy sighed. She never would’ve thought about warming the blood in the coffee maker, hell she wasn’t even sure she would’ve thought about fixing Angel’s blood in the first place.
The soft smile on both Cordy and the vampire’s faces produced a twinge of pain in Buffy’s gut. Acceptance didn’t make the hurt go away. Buffy hoped that day came soon because it really did hurt. She had to focus on that Cordelia did love Angel and made him happy.
The pain traveled from her belly to her heart. For how long would he be happy? She needed to go to Angel, tell him that she would be there for him.
Buffy closed her eyes resisting the urge. She couldn’t not yet, it was too soon. Angel wouldn’t believe that she was just offering only her friendship. Buffy sighed. Honestly, she couldn’t even be sure that ‘friendship’ would be all she was offering.
Part of her still wanted to deny the evidence before her and believe that she was the one Angel truly loved and that they would have a future some day.
Buffy looked up at Cordelia. But before that could happen, Cordy would have to die again. A soft accepting chuckle emerged from the blonde woman’s throat, Cordy’s death hadn’t guaranteed anything- in Buffy’s wish Angel was still going to leave her. Whatever. It didn’t matter.
Screw the Powers and whatever they have planned for the other woman. Buffy wasn’t going to let Cordelia die. Cordy would live and the world would be saved, hell,
Buffy was the slayer that had to count for something in this whole mess. Then Angel could be happy.
Chapter 38
Angel followed Cordelia as she took his mug and the coffee pot to the bathroom.
“It was making Xander squeamish, girly boy,” swirling the remaining drop of blood against the glass.
Angel said nothing, plucking the pot from her grasp.
“Angel,” Cordy’s brows raised towards the door the vampire shut behind him.
Angel took a slow step closer, his gaze intent on the young woman before him. Angel had been waiting for what seemed to be forever for the opportunity to be alone with Cordelia.
The fight in the cave had frightened him. Angel could count the times that he had been truly scared on his one hand, and all were because of the woman before him or his son. She did that to him even before Connor was born.
Her pain and death scared him; it still scared him, and scared him more than it scared Cordelia. Angel had asked the Conduits during Cordy’s death coma what did that mean- had Angel just wanted it confirmed?
Had he truly not known that his need and fear for Cordelia equated a love stronger than life itself or had that just scared him too? It seemed impossible now, him not knowing. Cordelia was a part of him. It was as if she always had been.
Angel needed the confirmation of her skin against his, proof that she was there before him within his reach. His to touch, feel and love.
“Angel,” Cordy murmured against his lips. “It’s the only bathroom. Not the best place.” Cordelia said the words as her arms drew the vampire closer, her mind trying to ignore the last vision, her body burying itself in the comfort and pleasure of Angel’s embrace.
“I need you.” Angel’s breath whispered against skin.
Cordelia wouldn’t cry, she would just love and give herself this time and memory. Wesley would figure it out soon enough and if he didn’t she could always tell but until then she would just love Angel. She had some time left.
Cordelia’s arms cradled the vampire’s face, trailing up to his hair, intertwining her fingers in the thickness, her lips responding as her tongue merged with Angel’s.
***
Fred shrugged squinting towards Gunn. “I don’t wanta,” shaking her head in a furious motion.
“Girl, Wesley said to get them. ” Gunn nodded to the door.
“But.” Fred glanced up. “Remember how grumpy they got when their sparing was interrupted.this is way more,” her head shaking back and forth, refusing to budge any closer to the bathroom.
“Girl, you don’t know that..okay, I can’t think of any other reason why the vamp disappeared in the bathroom with the dead alive again woman that he’s been hot for.for how many years? But, Fred, the world’s ending and how to stop it is kinda big news.”
“Then you knock.” Fred crossed her arms.
“Aw, woman.”
Gunn jumped as the door flew open.
“What?!” The word was barely audible through the vampire’s growl and glare.
“Aw, Wes, got it..the words done. Thought you would want to know.” Gunn shrugged, looking at his feet and then in the room Angel and Cordelia just exited.
“And gotta shake the snake and this is the only place I can, dawg, man, you got a hotel room, use it,” pushing into the room and closing the door.
“Fred, he’s an idiot,” Cordelia rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, but I love ‘him,” she shrugged and then smiled. “Wes figured it out. It’s pretty easy..well.not comfortable a little painful..but no dying. ” Fred turned and hugged Cordelia. “You don’t have to die at all.”
Angel’s scowl disappeared at the interruption. “Fred?”
Fred happily nodded. “Come on, Wesley will explain,” pulling at both the vampire and young woman taking them towards Wesley.
Cordelia let Fred drag her away from her safe haven. Angel wouldn’t go back now even if she begged him. Cordelia bit down her sigh. Angel wanted to believe and somehow Wesley found a way. Cordelia couldn’t believe that she overestimated Wesley’s research and thinking know how, the guy was a brain.
But Cordelia went willingly from her own piece of heaven to see how her friends were going to deny the hell of her death.
In a way, Cordelia was very grateful for all this. It truly showed her that she had been really loved- and not just by Angel. It wasn’t necessarily an easy concept for Cordelia to accept, but it was right in front of her. God, it was going to be even harder to leave.
“Good, good, everyone is here. The disc has been translated. I know now how to close the portal.” Wesley looked very pleased and he was. It was easy and Cordy didn’t have to die.
“The floor’s yours o’ brainy one,” Cordelia brought up her teasing smile. She would wait and see before she said anything.
“Yes, yes, well,” Wesley cleared his throat continuing, “The ritual that will close the Portal to Drakkus calls for the blood of Cordelia.” He smiled and bobbed on his heels.
Fred, Gunn and the rest of the room shot looks of disbelief at the ex-watcher and then gulped towards Angel and Cordelia. They had already heard the more comprehensive version and it was definitely something that should be told unabridged and unedited.
The short version sucked and was potentially dangerous as Angel growled louder.
Gunn moved in front of the very angry again vampire.
Fred swirled back to Cordy. “There’s more, it’s better..Wesley, hurry up explain all of it. Geez, ” swirling back to Wesley.
Wesley widened his eyes. “Oh. Not Cordy’s death, her blood, sorry that came out all wrong.”
“No, shit.” Gunn glared. “Angel, chill, English was a little over anxious and left out the important part- like no dying for the princess.”
“Right. Right. ” Wesley nodded encouragingly at the vampire and young woman. “Sorry. Cordy doesn’t have to die; we just need to have some of her blood to do the closing ritual. Not a lot. A cup or so. Not fatal, not all.”
“Why?” Angel half growled, he wasn’t at all sure that he should be relieved at the ex-watcher’s clarification.
“I would also like to hear the reasoning behind this particular bloody..albeit not fatal blood drawing,” Cordelia cocked a brow.
“No, really Cordy, these spells only call for a little.”
“A baby’s worth?” Her brow raised even more.
“The baby was the vessel, the amount just because, but it was the combination of human, Glisterian and Drakkus which was important. Just like it’s the combination of only human and Glisterian to close the portal. ” Wesley tugged at his glasses. “Cordy, it has to be you. The power and spell needed for impregnation is dark in nature, it’s too risky to try to impregnate Crystal with a human child.”
Cordy blinked, “Thank god you figured that out at least,” shaking her head.
“Cordy?” Angel questioned her tone.
“Nothing. Go on, Wesley stun us with your brillant deductions.”
“That’s it. We go to the Portal, do the recitation, spill..only a little bit of Cordy’s blood and it closes. Oh..well..and Buffy has to do the spell and the drawing of blood.”
“Eek” “Huh” “What?!”, that last exclamation was shouted by Angel and Buffy together. Cordelia remained quiet.
“Yes, to open the Portal to our dimension the human dimension, the Drakkus required a human that was born on the place of opening…the hell mouth..though, we don’t know for sure, I imagine that the young man in the cave was born in Sunnydale. Well, if that’s true it’s another reason that it has to be Cordy..she was born here. “
“I knew there had to be a reason that mom and dad chose this quaint little one stoplight hell pit to raise an only privileged but screwed-up kid,” Cordy grimaced.
Stupid, ex-watcher, supposed intellectual research extraordinaire with a so-so wardrobe. Cordelia couldn’t tell if Wesley was being blind on purpose or out of a desire to avoid, or just plain dumb.
“That doesn’t explain, me.” Buffy asked.
“Well, for the Portal to close the inscription calls for the ‘Protector’ of the place of entry to spill the blood in defense of the home. You’re the slayer..the protector of the Hellmouth if not more.”
“NO.” Angel growled.
Buffy winced. God, Angel didn’t trust her. That pain was worse than any she had ever experienced during any of this. Buffy clenched her jaw. Their love wouldn’t disappear into nothing.
Their love had had trust..okay, maybe it wasn’t enough..but he had to believe that she could do this. God, how bad had she been that he would question her.
“Angel, the inscription doesn’t call for a death, just the blood with Buffy doing it, Cordelia will be safe.”
Buffy had no indecision, doubts or pain at the moment of Wesley’s assurance, just love for the vampire and determination. She walked over slowly to the tense vampire. She would convince him, because she meant it.
“Angel, I swear, I will not let anything bad happen to her, I swear. On the love that we ONCE shared and the friendship that I hope for, I swear,” tears of absolute truth welled in the slayer’s bright blue eyes. “I won’t let anything take Cordy away from you and Connor. I won’t.”
Angel stared at the young woman, slowly he nodded, reaching for the trust that had always been there for his first love, but had been buried over the couple of days.
Cordelia stood silent watching. Wesley so pleased. Angel starting to trust and believe, Fred and Gunn were already there, even Willow, Xander and Dawn saw it as the way to go.
And there was Buffy, the champion that would strike the fatal blow and she was so sure and determined that she wouldn’t that she would be Cordelia’s protector. Cordelia couldn’t burst their bubble, she wouldn’t and she didn’t have to.
“So, the blood donation, does it have to happen now or can I get some sleep.”
Wesley’s lids blinked through the lens of his glasses. “I..we have time, the rate of growth is slow.”
“Good, I saw a cot in the training room, anyone mind?” Cordelia gestured.
“Um, no.” “Of course not.” “Go.” “Have a nice rest.”
“Do you want to go back to the hotel?”
Cordelia smiled at the vampire. “No, too far away, more rest here, rest now. Oh, tomorrow, Crystal will be there.”
“Um, Cordy, I don’t think that’s wise. The Drakkus will appear with your presence. We can protect you until the ritual is done, but Crystal’s presence may change that dynamic.”
“We’ll need her. Just make sure she’s protected.” Cordelia shut the door behind her.
Angel shot a look to Wesley. “You’re sure.”
“Yes.”
Angel turned to look at Crystal. “Why do we need her?”
“Angel.”
“You said it wasn’t wise, why would Cordy say we need her. Why?”
Buffy felt a twinge of unease at Angel’s question remembering her promise to Cordelia. No. It wasn’t going to happen. Buffy would be there. Wesley said they only needed a little bit of blood, she would make sure that both Cordelia and Crystal lived beyond tomorrow.
She was the slayer. Buffy could control this.
“Because, Cordy needs to be protected and I’ve got my power, that’s why.” Crystal stood up, showing more courage against the tense vampire that she ever showed before more in fact that she even knew she had.
Angel growled and went to follow Cordelia.
Chapter 39
Cordelia cringed. She wished the vampire had given her just a few more minutes. She took a deep breath and concentrated back on Chapter 3 and 4 of the handbook that Skip had given her.
Lorne was right blocking a being’s soul and emotional reactions to events was a nifty gift, if she could do it and maintain it. Cordelia smiled as the vampire knelt down by the cot.
“Cordy?”
Cordelia raised her eyes. “Geez, Angel, I just heard I’m going to be bled..by Buffy of all people and still get to live..I think I can be a little overwhelmed, don’t you?”
Angel cupped her face. “Cordy, you’ve a right to be mad at Buffy, I was..but..I..she won’t hurt you.she won’t let you die.she promised.”
Cordelia wanted to laugh. Angel and the women who loved him and kept promising him things that they just couldn’t keep. God, she wanted him.
“I believe that Buffy will do what she can,” Cordelia trailed a soft caress up the strong plains of Angel’s face, questioning.
“What?’
Cordelia shrugged, tears forming in her eyes. “I’m not sure that I’ve told you how much I love you. You know, though, right?” blinking, “Please, know. A bit slow on the whole uptake thing, but you’ve been my life for so long, by reason, my love, please know it. Please, tell me you felt it.”
“God, yes.” Angel buried his head onto her chest, hearing the life beat pounding through the skin. Angel almost felt joy. He knew he wouldn’t be able to feel it completely until his family was safe back in LA where they belonged.
Then Angel didn’t even want to think about what the ‘Curse’ would do to him and Cordelia, but right now, he knew that it was okay, and Cordelia untouchable by a gypsy curse was so much better than by death.
He would just hold on and hope for the day that he could really be free to live and love the amazing woman beneath him, it was getting closer he could feel it.
Angel felt something..a twinge that he wanted to ignore but it was the twinge that kept Angelus at bay.. questions, fears, thoughts and knowledge. Angel circled the compliant woman into a tighter embrace; his gentle thrust becoming harder and more demanding. This was his.
Cordelia danced with each push, her hips capturing every movement of Angel’s. God she wanted to stay like this. Every movement every touch singed Angel’s love into her body. She moved quicker more frantically, knowing that this was the last pleasure that the Powers would give her.
Idiots. Like this was enough. How could heaven compare. This was her happiness being held being safe. Cordelia buried her head into the vampire’s chest as he growled and she gasped their pleasure at that moment.
Angel moved crawling up her body touching as much skin as he could, finally satisfied that he had touched every inch of the young woman, he asked the question that wouldn’t go away.
“Crystal? Why do you want her there in the cave? You’ve been .”
Cordelia place a gentle hand over the vampire’s mouth and proceeded to lie one more time to the vampire. “I’m bait girl, again, she’s got the glowly power. She knows how to use it. I just want to make sure that Wesley’s outcome is right. I want her right next to me. But, Angel, do me a favor, it seems that I’ll be a bit preoccupied.. Crystal’s young, keep her safe. okay, for me, okay?” lowering her lips onto the vampire’s, her hands reaching back around the firm musceles tugging his body back over her’s,moving her hips again, starting the dance again.
Angel wanted to ask more, know more but..know or not know, Cordelia was beneath him, she was his and he would not waste any more time.
Chapter 40
Cordelia didn’t want to wake up, she didn’t. She closed her eyes tighter burrowing further into Angel’s body.
The vampire moved instinctively pulling and fastening the warm body tightly against his. He refused to get up, he wouldn’t. Angel would stay like this until the end of time. Screw everything else.
But reality had a way of intruding on a dream. Connor’s cry echoed throughout the room, as did the bickering between Gunn and Xander over the chocolate doughnuts and their yell when they both realized that Fred had already eaten them.
“Angel,” Cordy whispered, her breath tickling his chest with its warmth. “I don’t want to wake up, make it last a little bit longer. Lorne has formula for Connor, right?”
“Yes,” strong hands traveled gently along delicate flesh, lips nudged against skin. “Mine, always,” Angel lifted his head capturing Cordelia’s smile, their tongues starting to move and taste.
Cordelia leaned into the thin mattress, the feel of the light straps underneath straining at their increased movement. How was it that a simple kiss, two lips, two tongues meeting could be so different each time but so amazingly wonderful all the time? It made each touching new and wonderful.
Angel could really kiss. Cordelia sighed as her body shivered as his hands moved down to her hips, clutching and guiding, bringing them together in pleasure then lifting to tease and then back together in pleasure.
Cordelia felt like she should help, but Angel was doing so extremely well moving and manipulating her body against his. His lips and hands stroked and caressed. She just hoped that he was getting at least half the pleasure that he was giving her. Cordelia wouldn’t have minded at all if this were how she was supposed to die. But it wasn’t, her hands started to move insistently touching and capturing as much of the vampire as she could.
This would have to last her an eternity. Tears uncontrolled started to fall as she pulled him closer. Cordelia wanted him, safe, strong and over her, his weight holding her, real and loving, she could be in his arms until death and she would be happy.
“Cordy,” Angel cupped the moist face at Cordelia’s whimper. It wasn’t one of pleasure not anymore but one of heart wrenching sadness. Angel heard and felt it.
Cordelia kissed, bit and rubbed, hiding in his chest then looked up a smile back on her face. “Yes.” Her eyes sparkled with love and happiness and nothing more, the tears gone.
“You? What?” Angel didn’t want to leave the encasement of her body’s warmth, but Cordelia had been crying, real tears with real sorrow. Angel had to know why.
“Still a little overwhelmed,” lifting her hand tighter around the vampire’s naked back. “Gee, me over Buffy, who’d of thought, I figured all those really loud voices refraining over and over again screaming ‘Buffy and Angel forever’ would have nicked this love fest in the bud.”
“Cordy,” Angel lifted further up from her body but not withdrawing. “You know….”
“Sure, I know.” Cordelia laughed. “You’re not mad at her anymore are you? You shouldn’t be, she loves you and honestly, Angel, she has more of a reason to be mad than you, you used her and she knows it. Bad move- a man move.”
“Cordy,” Angel questioned the young woman’s attitude and the truth of her soft laughing words annoyed him, it was distracting him from the body beneath him, he didn’t want to talk or feel guilt. He started to move away.
“Sorry,” Cordelia wrapped her hand into Angel’s hair bringing the vampire’s scowling face closer. “Don’t be mad and don’t leave me, please,” her tone changing instantly to want.
Angel stared, the laugher gone leaving only an aching plea of need, one that he knew was reflected in his own eyes. Anger could never take that away. His need for Cordelia was as constant as his love. “Then don’t talk,” Angel’s voice rough, his thumb brushing at the beautiful offending mouth.
“Kiss, then,” refusing to give up the last word, but conceding the point.
A slow smile drew Angel’s terse lips upwards as his head leaned in reclaiming the beautiful mouth ending any more conversation.