Part 16
“Is that hot chocolate?”
“What?”
Willow pointed to the mug in the microwave. “Are you making some hot chocolate?”
“Oh. No. I’m heating Angel’s dinner. I thought you went to bed.”
“I did but then Oz and Xander came in to talk. I just sent them back to their room.”
“Where’s Buffy?”
“She went for a quick patrol. No rest for the wicked means no rest for the slayer.”
“That’s funny I didn’t see her leave.”
“She went out the window.”
“Huh?”
“Force of habit I guess. Where’s Angel?”
“He’s getting the dishes from downstairs.”
“We can help with that. I’ll go get..”
“It’s okay. I do know how to load a dishwasher.” She flashed a smile. “But don’t tell anyone.”
“Your secret is safe with me.”
Angel walked into the kitchen carrying several bowls and spoons. “Hey Willow.”
“Hey”
He set the dishes on the counter and started handing them to Cordelia one at a time as she placed them in the dishwasher.
Willow watched the pair work together. A small knot began forming in the pit of her stomach. “So…Buffy went on patrol.”
“Uh huh”
“There’s no need for concern. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”
“I’m sure she will.”
Cordelia took the mug out of the microwave and handed it to Angel. “Are you sure you don’t want me to pick up some cow’s blood next time? How about some lamb? Variety is the spice of life.”
“Pig’s blood is fine. I’ve grown accustomed to it.”
She watched him drink for a moment. “Do you mean accustomed like I can make myself eat spinach because it’s good for me but it tastes yucky?”
“Well it’s nowhere near as good as…” He glanced over at the gaping redhead still hovering in the doorway. He set his unfinished dinner on the counter.
Oblivious to Willow’s shock and discomfort, “Human blood. Well that makes sense. Otherwise you’d see vamps moving to the country to do some porky pig hunting. OK. I just gave myself a seriously strange visual. Does all human blood taste the same?”
Angel’s head whipped around. “What?”
“Human blood, I mean is it like wine with its differences in flavor or is it basically like Coca Cola? You know always the same.”
His eyes drifted over to the still mute girl.
Cordelia followed his gaze. “I’m sorry, Willow. I never asked what you came down for.”
“Oh I was thirsty but now… I really shouldn’t drink any liquids before bed. You know it ahh makes me need to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I’m just uhh going to go upstairs now. Good night.”
“G’night.” She turned back to Angel. “Did she look a little green to you?” She smiled sweetly. “Be a good boy and finish your dinner. No happy plate..err..mug means no dessert for you.”
He drank the rest in one gulp. “Finished. So what’s for dessert?”
“Not what you’re thinking.”
“No?” He rinsed the cup out and added it to the dishwasher. “So what is for dessert then?”
He turned around to find a popsicle being waved in his face.
“It’s cherry.”
“…”
“You said you liked ice cream because it made your mouth seem warm. Well so will a popsicle. Try it.”
“How about you eat it? I’ll pass.”
“You’re no fun.” She walked around the counter and sat down on a stool. She gave it a few long wet licks before she began sucking on her frozen treat. “It’s good. You don’t know what you’re missing. I love these on hot day. I’ll sit poolside and eat one after another. Anita always gets the sugar free ones so they’re low on the sinful-treat-one-should-indulge-in-sparingly list.”
Angel stood mesmerized by her mouth. She alternated between licking and sucking. He couldn’t decide which his favorite was. His hand gripped the counter for support when a significant portion disappeared inside the warm cavern of her mouth. He spotted her tongue dragging along the underside as she worked it free.
She could feel his eyes on her. An evil thought popped into her head. She very slowly slid its ice cold length in and out of her mouth. Her eyes drifted shut in concentration. Some melted juice dripped down her hand. Her pink tongue darted out to lick the sticky sweetness off her hand then she leisurely ran her tongue to the tip. Bit by bit the popsicle slipped back inside her mouth. She hollowed her cheeks as pulled it out again. When his soft groan reached her ears, she bit the tip off and chewed.
He reached across the counter and snatched it from her hand. He glared at her sadistic torture device as he tossed it in the sink.
“Hey!”
“That was cruel.”
“Nobody said you had to stare, you big perv.”
“Yeah well… You’re a meanie.”
“Aww is my poor vampire troubled? Are you feeling a little frustrated?” She leaned against the counter separating them. “Maybe you should go take a dip in the pool. You didn’t get to swim today.” Her brow scrunched in thought. “Wouldn’t water keep you from burning to dust?”
“What? Can we please get back to us swimming together? You can go get your red bikini or better yet no suits at all.”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s not what it looks like, Buffy. I thought I was wearing my swimsuit under my clothes but I was wrong. I didn’t intend to get naked with your boyfriend in my pool. No Buffy. Please put that sharp object down. Thanks but I’ll pass.” She hopped off the stool and went to rummage through the cabinets.
“What are you looking for?”
“Willow put me in the mood for hot chocolate and since you didn’t let me finish my treat… Ah hah! Do you want some?”
“Sure. Why not? I’m not exactly eager to go to bed.”
“It’s only for one night.”
“You know if we wait until everyone’s asleep, I can stay in your room. No one would notice.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Fine. Just so you know if I hear Xander going near your door, I intend to kick his ass.”
“Oh please! Buffy will probably try climbing in your window when she gets back.”
“It wouldn’t matter if I was in your room.”
“You’re right. It wouldn’t because my broken and bloodied body would be on its way to the hospital… or the morgue.”
“Well if somebody would have let me tell her tonight, they would already be gone.”
“Come on. Tonight was fun. “The Princess Bride” is one of my favorite movies. Willow and I finally beat Xander and Oz at pool. Buffy kicked all our asses at darts although I still say she should’ve had to play blindfolded.”
“It wouldn’t have made a difference. If they’re so much fun, how come you’re not upstairs in Willow’s room talking with the boys?” Angel couldn’t keep the scowl off his face.
She shrugged. “You hadn’t had dinner yet and… I wanted to spend some time alone with you before I had to sleep alone. I’m used to you being there beside me, which is ridiculous. It’s only been a few days.”
“I know but when something feels right, time is irrelevant.”
“When did you become so wise about love, Angel?” She handed him his hot chocolate.
“What do you mean become? I’ve always been wise.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re a regular Joe Sensitive except for your penchant for hookers.”
“You’re never going to let that go, are you?”
“Hell no. It’s funny in a sad and pathetic kind of way. I’ve never met anyone who has literally paid for sex.”
“I didn’t pay that often.”
“Yeah. I’m sure you mainly got some by making false promises and lying but I wouldn’t recommend using that defense. It gives the impression I’m better off with Xander. If you weren’t a vampire, I’d be asking for a note from your doctor.”
“I wasn’t that bad as a human.”
“Uh huh. Nice distinction. They had diseases back then and you were a big ho. You do the math.”
“Hey!”
She laughed at his offended expression. “Angel, I fell in love with a good man. I’m only teasing. Besides you’re the one that tried to remind me how experienced you are.”
“I’ll never say another word about it.”
“Don’t do that. I was only teasing, honest. I want to know all about you, the whole you.”
“You would?”
“Of course I would.”
He smiled. “I feel exactly the same way.”
“So tell me about….”
***
Buffy stood frozen by the pool. She couldn’t believe her eyes. It wasn’t possible. It had to be some kind of sick joke.
Angel and Cordelia were in the kitchen… laughing. The two were obviously enjoying each other’s company. They looked completely at ease with one another. He looked like… a normal guy. The normal guy she wanted him to be.
She watched him add soap to the dishwasher and start the cycle like it was the most natural thing in the world. Cordelia waited for him in the doorway and switched off the lights as they left together.
After another moment of utter disbelief, she walked around the house. “So much for going through the door.” She considered climbing up to Angel’s window but the idea of hanging there until he showed up wasn’t appealing. She hoped Willow was still awake.
***
“You’re really going to make me sleep in my room? Alone?”
“Angel, I don’t think we should chance it. We’ve already been reckless enough today hence the no-more-kissing-until-they’re-gone rule. If it wasn’t for your vampire hearing, we would’ve gotten caught. Even with your vamp warning system, Oz almost saw us. He kept looking at us funny too.”
“He didn’t see anything. Nobody’s around and I’ll listen for heartbeats before I leave your room in the morning. It will work.”
“I don’t know.”
“Please? You know that without you I’ll have another nightmare and I’ll end up waking the whole house. They’ll be questions and Buffy will want to stay with me so I won’t have anymore nightmares. You don’t want that to happen, do you?”
“That’s so not fair.”
“Yes but did it work?”
“Well I guess we..”
The guestroom door opened and out walked Buffy. “Hey guys.”
Angel took a small step back. “Hey Buffy. When did you get back?”
“Just now. I wanted to say good night.” She glanced over at Cordelia. “You’re up late.”
“I was just going to bed.”
“Don’t let us stop you. Angel and I will be going to bed soon too.” She hooked her arm with his and pressed her body into his side. “Good night, Cordy.”
“Huh? Oh right. G’night.”
Angel watched Cordelia’s door close, shutting him out, barring him from her embrace, stopping him from finding a peaceful night’s rest.
“I thought she’d never leave.”
He could hear Cordelia’s heart on the other side of the door, not moving away. “This is her house.”
“I know but you’re MY boyfriend and we’ve barely spent any time alone all day. I miss you.”
A pang of guilt raced through his system but no regret. At least not the kind of regret he was supposed to feel. He and Cordelia’s shared laughter had been too recent. Although he still didn’t understand what was so funny about liking Charlton Heston movies and there was nothing wrong with Barry Manilow either. “I thought we decided you’d be sharing a room with Willow.”
“We did but I thought we could sit up and talk. We don’t have to… Someone might hear us. We can talk about whatever you want.”
“I’m a little tired.”
“You’re a vampire, Angel.”
“I haven’t forgotten that but I’ve been keeping human hours lately. We should probably just go to sleep. Separately. You know you in your bed and me in my bed.” He heard Cordelia move away from her door. Before he knew what was happening, Buffy’s lips were on his. The feel of her tongue trying to tease mouth open snapped him out of his shock. He pulled away and cupped her cheeks in his hands. He really didn’t want to hurt her. *A small part of me will always love you.* “Good night.” He placed a soft kiss on the tip of her nose.
Buffy stood wide-eyed as Angel disappeared behind his door. Their kiss tasted sorrowful and why did he kiss her nose? It was sweet in a completely chaste way. She needed to know if she’d done something wrong. *Maybe Willow was right. Maybe he needed someone to talk to and I wasn’t there for him.* She glanced at Cordelia’s room. *He was forced to settle for Cordelia. That’ll change soon. We will take things one step at a time. I made the offer to talk. He’ll come around. If he can talk to Cordy, he can certainly talk to me. I just need to be patient.* She walked to her room. “Angel and I will be fine. We were meant to be.”
***
Angel paced the length of his room. He knew the nightmares would return but even if they didn’t, he wanted to sleep beside Cordelia. He wanted her in his arms. He wanted her heartbeat and breathing to lull him to sleep. He wanted her warmth to slowly seep into his cold body warming it. He wanted to be near the woman he loved.
He froze mid-step. A deep growl burst forth through his clenched teeth. With a burst of speed he was standing in his open doorway. “Are you lost?”
“Aahh!” Xander clutched his heart. “You scared me.”
“Are. You. Lost?”
The nervous boy glanced at Cordelia’s door. “I was just umm… Why am I explaining myself to you? What business is it of yours?”
“She’s sleeping.”
“And you know this how?”
Angel tapped on his ear. “You wouldn’t want to disturb her, would you?”
“I..”
“I’m sure whatever you wanted to say to her can wait until morning, don’t you think?”
“Yeah. I’m just gonna go back to bed now.”
“Good decision.” Angel remained fixed in his doorway, his arms folded, hands clenched into tight fists. Xander stood frozen. “Good night Xander.”
“Oh right. I’m going. Good night.” He stopped after a few steps and glanced back over his shoulder at the imposing vampire. He withered under Angel’s harsh glare and continued walking to his room cursing vamp hearing all the way.
He couldn’t take it anymore. Angel went back into his room and grabbed a change of clothes. He locked his door then forced it to close behind him. He went across the hall and walked into Cordelia’s bedroom. He didn’t know whether to be happy at the ease of his entrance or angry that Xander could have done the same.
Cordelia started awake at the sound of a bang. Her eyes popped open. “You know for a vampire you’re not very stealthy.”
“Sorry.” He picked up the items he’d knocked off her desk and moved his clothes to the chair instead.
She shifted over a little and pulled the covers back. “I thought you’d never get here.”
“What?”
She giggled at his expression. “I tried to stay awake to wait for you but you took too long.”
“I’ve been busy pacing in my room.”
“That’s silly. Come to bed.”
He pulled the covers off her completely. He only needed the warmth of her body. She was wearing a long night shirt. His gaze roved over her body.
“Don’t even think about it. We are going to sleep.”
Angel slid in beside her. “Xander was prowling around your door.”
“He was? What did you do?”
“I encouraged him to go back to his room. I didn’t even hurt him.”
“I’m so proud. So what’s your plan if Buffy sneaks into your room and discovers your empty bed?”
“I locked my door.”
“What? How are you supposed to get back in?”
“Don’t worry. I can get it open and without damaging it so don’t worry.”
“OK”
“I locked your door too. Something it should have already been.”
“I didn’t want to lock you out. I figured you’d sneak over after you got rid of Buffy. How was I supposed to know you’d stay away?”
He nuzzled her neck. His soft growl of frustration vibrated against her throat. “You said I couldn’t sleep here.”
“I was trying to be mature, dumbass. I didn’t mean it.” Blunt teeth nibbled on her ear. “You need to learn how to read between the lines.” She felt his hand slide up her leg under her nightgown and take a firm grip on her hip. “We should get some sleep. It’s late.”
He trailed kisses along her jaw until he reached her mouth. “You’re probably right.” He seized her lips, attacking them with his own.
She moaned into his mouth. Her hands desperately clutched his shoulders as she pulled him on top of her.
His hand slid back down and gripped her leg behind her knee. He tugged it around his hip allowing him to drop between her legs. He groaned at the sensation of her heat teasing him through their thin barriers. He began kissing a path down her slim neck, occasionally nipping the soft skin.
“Angel, we can’t.” Her fingers belied her words as she pressed him to her neck. “This is such a bad idea.”
“Very bad idea.” He rocked against her eliciting a moan.
“Very bad.” She missed his taste and yanked him back to her mouth.
He palmed her breasts, testing their weight. He hungered to touch bare skin. His hands moved to the edge of her nightgown.
She stilled his hands. “Did you hear something?” Her doorknob squeaked as someone tried to turn it.
“Cordy, are you awake?” was heard from the other side.
“I should go answer it. We wouldn’t want to leave Xander out there.”
“Don’t even think about it, Angel.”
“Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt him. I’ll just explain in words his small brain will understand that you’re busy right now and you’ll talk to him tomorrow.”
“Very funny. Is he still out there?” As if responding to her question, the doorknob squeaked again.
“Can I please hurt him? You already told him no. Can’t he respect that?”
“You mean like you did?”
“What? How.. You.. I..”
“Shh” She shifted his weight off her. “Is he gone?”
“Yes”
“I’m such a horrible person.”
“What?”
“That was my boyfriend out there and I’m in here making out with another guy. I’m a big fat cheater. Well not fat fat. I’m developing some seriously bad karma and I don’t even believe in karma.”
“Mine is about as bad as it can get already.”
“Well bully for you. I may have dated a lot of guys but I have always been faithful. I always dump a guy before moving on. This time… It was complicated.”
“Xander doesn’t deserve your loyalty. I heard his thoughts and..”
“Don’t. You can’t tell me his private thoughts.”
“Why not? He..”
She slapped her hands over her ears. “Not listening.”
Angel lowered her hands. “But..”
“No. I know you couldn’t help hearing them but you can help repeating them. Thoughts are private. Even if they prove he’s a big jerk, I don’t want to know.”
“OK. Just trust me. He’s not worth your guilt. We fell in love. Please don’t apologize for that.”
“I’m not. I’m not sorry we fell in love. I’m just sorry two people are going to get hurt because of it.”
“Me too. I hate hurting Buffy. My consolation is the hope that she’ll find someone who is right for her.” He wrapped his arms around Cordelia.
She rested her head on his shoulder. “I know I’m damning myself more by saying this aloud but if we don’t tell them soon I’m going to spontaneously combust from frustration.”
He kissed her forehead. “You took the words right out of my mouth.”