Part 14
“You know Angel for a guy who owns his own business, you’re not very bright.”
“Excuse me?”
George looked over to the dessert table where Cordelia and Donna were standing. “How could you not notice Cordy? Did she go through an awkward stage? ‘Cause I’m having a hard time picturing any man not wanting her, especially if she’s the aggressor.”
“I did notice her. She was very beautiful and stop picturing my wife.” Angel suppressed a growl. “You can stop staring at her now.”
“Sorry man. It’s just..she’s really hot.” He ducked his head when he saw how pissed off Angel was getting.
“What did you do now, George?”
“Nothing Sweetie. Angel and I were just talking.”
Cordelia gave Angel a half smile, trying to ease the tension. “What were you talking about that turned my husband into a statue?”
“Nothing”
“George, you weren’t bothering Angel about what was said in group, were you?”
“You agreed with me.”
“True” She turned to Cordelia. “I gotta admit it is a little hard to believe.”
“Which part?”
“C’mon Cordy. You’re a beautiful woman.”
“That’s sweet Donna but it takes more than a pretty face to turn Angel’s head. Back then I was spoiled, selfish and kind of a bitch.”
“Cor”
“And I was an idiot. I only thought of Angel as a potential boyfriend. It never occurred to me to be his friend. I assumed he was relieved when I stopped bothering him. I know Buffy was. It’s strange. Even after meeting up in LA, becoming friends and eventually falling in love, it never occurred to me. I had no idea until today.”
“You guys never talked about it?”
“Not really. Like I said, we didn’t become friends until LA. We don’t talk about our lives in Sunnydale that often.”
“Why not? You don’t discuss your childhoods, your growing pains, first loves?”
“I guess we should but they’re kinda sore subjects for both of us. I mean we know the big picture but we tend to avoid going into the specifics. My parents’ idea of child rearing was buying expensive gifts. The spoiled, selfish bitch I used to be was because of my parents. They wanted me to become a rich man’s trophy wife. My first love? I caught him kissing another girl. Basically my life back then is something I had to work to overcome. I don’t like to dwell on it. My philosophy has always been to suck it up and move on. It’s similar for Angel. His family…is gone now.”
Her hand began to rub soothing circles on his back. “It’s hard for him to talk about. His first love..well I got to watch parts of that. He has shared a lot of that with me. We do need to work on our sharing but Angel does know me better than anyone. The truth is we both spent most of our lives not really letting anyone see our real selves. We have finally let each other in but it’s a slow process.”
“Your parents wanted you to be a trophy wife?”
“Yes. When I told my mother my score on the SAT’s, she told me taking them was a complete waste of time. She knew several men who would be more than happy to marry me after graduation. They were wealthy enough to keep me in the lifestyle I was accustomed to. The men were mainly in their forties.”
“Jesus! What the hell was wrong with your mother?”
Cordy shrugged. “Daddy was fifteen years older than my mother. She was nineteen when they got married.”
“No wonder you don’t like talking about them. What do they think of Angel?”
“They’ve never met him. My parents live outside the country now.”
“They didn’t come to your wedding?”
“Well due to a little tax problem, they can’t return to the states.”
“Oh. When was the last time you saw them?”
“A couple of months before I graduated high school.”
“They left you?”
“Yes”
“Where did you live?”
“My grandmother let me live with her until graduation.”
“Then what?”
“I moved to Los Angeles.”
“I’m sorry but your parents should be strung up from the nearest tree.”
“They offered to take me with them.”
“How generous of them.”
“They thought so. I decided it was time for me to be on my own. It didn’t last long. Before I knew it, Angel and Doyle came into my life, then Wesley and Gunn and Fred. If my parents hadn’t had their run in with the IRS, I probably wouldn’t be here right now.” Cordelia looked at her virtually untouched dessert and began eating. Lunch was almost over.
Angel had forced himself to remain quiet during Cordelia and Donna’s conversation. He couldn’t exactly ask her any questions without drawing suspicion. This was stuff he should’ve already known. That meant he couldn’t show his surprise either. He was very tempted to express his anger. It seemed appropriate but he didn’t want to upset Cordelia.
She recited the facts without showing the hurt. She never really talked about her parents. She had told him how they had lost everything. He wondered if her parents had really fled from prosecution after the authorities had seized all of their assets. He suspected her parents had managed to take care of themselves before leaving their daughter to fend for herself.
He was grateful for Wesley’s suggestion they stick as close to the truth as possible. Had he asked Cordelia these questions, she probably would have avoided answering them. Then again, he’d never actually asked. They really did need to talk after the case was over. It was time for them to really open up. Both of them.
***
Bob listened to the couple’s conversation. Many of the questions he was to ask were being answered. He didn’t appreciate George’s comments, though he secretly agreed with him. He had been enchanted with Cordelia the moment he saw her. Her willingness to seek guidance for her marriage only made him more enamored of her.
After years of counseling others and his own years of matrimonial harmony, he knew that a strong marriage requires two people willing to learn, grow and work together. Angel could never be the right partner for her. He was too obstinate and closed off. If only Bob was permitted to make her see the truth but he would not disobey his orders.
***
Cordelia could hardly believe the retreat was almost over. So much had happened. She and Angel were in love. She had learned some important lessons about herself and Angel. There were a lot of things they needed to talk about. There were walls that needed to be torn down.
Her hand absently traced patterns on Angel’s thigh. She’d tuned out the group session going on around her. While they may have made great strides in their relationship, they had made very little progress with the case. Sure they suspected Bob of being a bad guy but was he guilty of the disappearances? What happened to the couples? What did Bob or whoever do to them? Why did he or they do whatever to them?
Their final session was tomorrow afternoon. By evening, they would be on their way back into the city. She wondered if their frequent whispering had given them away. Wesley told them to use the computer but she couldn’t stop herself from saying what needed to be said. She had placed her needs ahead of the case.
Cordelia turned her attention to studying the other couples. She hadn’t paid them much attention before but now that she was really looking she noticed the changes. The majority of the couples were sitting closer and touching a lot more. Even George and Donna, though they still bickered, were cuddled on their couch. She began to fear that one of the other couples might be selected at the next target. Bob hadn’t seemed pleased with their progress. As upsetting as not solving the case would be, the thought of another couple disappearing was a million times worse.
She resolved to personally watch as many of the couples as she could actually drive away. Sunlight would prevent Angel from being much help. His allergy would assure them of being the last couple to leave the center.
Angel watched Cordelia out of the corner of his eye. It was obvious she wasn’t listening to Jake. He wasn’t much better. Cordelia’s fingers had been stroking his thigh for well over an hour and he was painfully hard. In all his years of experience with torture, he never thought four fingers and a thumb could cause such wonderful pain without drawing blood or never moving more than a couple of inches in any direction.
Her hand remained closer to his knee than his groin. Cordelia seemed completely unaware of the thoughts she was inspiring. The longer he waited until he could touch her, the more creative his thoughts became. He was currently devising a way to test just how flexible Cordelia is. But between fantasies, he wondered what she was thinking about.
Cordelia was glad when the session showed signs of ending. The workshops were over so she wasn’t going to be forced to talk about her sex life. She wasn’t used to that. It had been so long since she had girlfriends.
She had Fred, but Fred got blushy when they talked about crushy feeling. She couldn’t imagine the shy, somewhat crazy girl talking about one way streets, sex toys or bondage. As shocking as some the stories had been for her, she knew they were relatively tame compared to Angel’s history.
Every time she thought about it, she felt her insecurities come creeping back. Cordelia knew with certainty that she would never grow tired of making love to Angel but she couldn’t help worrying that he would eventually grow bored with her.
*He’d never admit it. He’ll just suffer silently about my sexual short-comings until he starts to resent me. Then he’ll have an affair. He’ll decide he really should repay the furies for their help. The bastard could teach me how to be a better lover but nooo! He has to turn to the floating whores! Poor pathetic Cordy can’t keep a man interested. She never has and she never will. Maybe my mother was right. Love is overrated.*
Angel winced. Her gentle touching had ceased, she began digging her nails into his leg. He half expected her to draw blood despite the thick material of his pants. He covered her hand with his. She immediately released her grip.
“Sorry”
“What’s the matter?”
“It’ll keep ’til later. We have an appointment with Bob before dinner.”
“How could I forget?”
When Angel stood, Cordelia couldn’t help noticing his erection. “Happy to see me?”
“What? Oh..you’re the one who’s been touching me. What did you expect?”
She stood up and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I really have that much of an effect on you? I was only touching your leg.”
Angel pulled her closer. “Cor, you could touch my ankles and get the same reaction. It has nothing to do with where you touch me. It’s YOU touching me that sets me on fire.” He leaned in, brushing his lips to hers. He felt a slight tug on his bottom lip as he pulled away. “Do we have to go see Bob?”
“Yes” She wiggled out of his arms. “Let’s go and be good.”
“Fine” Angel did his best not to pout.
~***~
“Cordelia. Angel. Come in.”
“Hi Bob. We missed you in group today.”
Bob blushed at Cordelia’s words. “I had some things I needed to take care of. Did I miss any breakthroughs?”
“Actually yes”
“Tell me about it.”
“Do you remember how we told you we knew each other before but we weren’t really friends until later?”
“Yes”
“Well today I learned that Angel wanted to be my friend. I only thought of him as boyfriend material. I was so..blind. You know up until today, I was always kind of annoyed that he hadn’t thought of me as a hottie back then. It totally escaped me that he had seen something underneath the superficial girl I was. These days it makes me angry when someone can’t see past my appearance. I guess I am difficult to please.”
“You keep things interesting, Cor. I would have liked to be friends back then but it’s not like I went out of my way to make that happen. I was too absorbed with…other things.”
“You know you can say the B-word.” Now that she knew he is in love with her, it wasn’t upsetting to hear about Buffy. The name didn’t fill her with terror. If he wanted to be with Buffy, he would have chosen to be with her now that the potion has secured his soul.
“What’s the B-word?”
“Buffy. That’s the name of the girl Angel was in love with in Sunnydale. They had this whole star-crossed lover thing going on. She was his first love.”
“I see”
“She was the reason I thought Angel never noticed me.” Cordelia looked at Angel. “You can blame your lack of attempts at friendship on that rollercoaster ride but we both know that’s only part of the reason.”
“What do you mean?”
She turned back to Bob. “I was slow on the uptake but I get it now. Don’t get me wrong. Angel definitely had his Buffy-colored glasses on but the truth is he didn’t think he deserved to have friends. He barely believes it now.”
Angel fidgeted. He changed his mind about sticking to the truth. The conversation was becoming too personal. She was right but he didn’t want to discuss it in front of the asshole counselor.
“Why is that?”
“Oh” Cordelia regretted her candor. “Umm..Angel..had a..reckless youth.” *Understatement much*
“Tell me about it.”
“It’s all in the past. Angel is a completely different person now. So am I. I was a total bitch back then. My parents had money. Had being the operative word. I mean I was forever ridiculing other kids for their fashion sense or their overall loserness. Urgh! See. There I go again. Most were good people. You have no idea how many times I made some poor girl cry because of some cruel comment I made.”
“You were a child yourself.”
“That’s no excuse. A girl I was mean to actually started stalking me. She beat up my boyfriend with a baseball bat. She pushed my friend down a flight of stairs. She tied me to a chair with the intentions of cutting up my face. She..was caught. I managed to get away with just a small cut on my cheek. It didn’t even leave a scar. I’d like to say the experience totally changed my behavior but it didn’t. It took my parents losing everything and my moving to LA only to discover how truly insufficient my charms were to make a dent in my bitchiness. After running into Angel, I continued to grow up. Each new..trial I faced, changed me.” She decided to lighten the mood. “Now I only let the inner-bitch out when I need it, like dealing with lawyers.”
Angel knew Cordelia rattled off her painful memories to distract Bob from his past. He had to admit as much as he wanted Cordelia all to himself, the retreat had helped him learn a lot about the beautiful, loving, complex woman beside him.
“I must say I am quite impressed at the way you’ve opened up, Cordelia. Conquering your personal demons is very difficult. Talking about it is even more so. I hope you never allow anyone to stall your growth.” He briefly glanced at Angel before continuing. “Have you ever considered helping others?”
“Huh?”
“You would make an excellent counselor.” *Or an excellent counselor’s wife*
“Thanks. I do help people. Taking care of my makeshift family is a full time job.”
“Your family?”
“Angel, Wesley, Gunn, Fred and Lorne are my family now. We may not share blood ties but our connection is undeniable.” A thought occurred to her. “It was actually Wesley’s idea that we attend this retreat. They basically told us not to come back until we were happily in love again.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. None of them could bear the thought of our marriage breaking up, not that we were ever in real danger of that happening. Angel and I were considering going away after the retreat is over. Don’t get me wrong. The sessions have been totally helpful. We’ve made huge breakthroughs in our relationship, but we could use some alone time.”
“I call this purely providential.”
“What do you mean?”
“I had planned on extending an invitation to you today.”
“To what?”
“Not what, where. In rare instances, we invite special couples to join a very private club at an extremely exclusive resort. It’s location is a closely guarded secret. Only members know where it is. It’s quite the oasis.”
“Really? Sounds wonderful.”
“It is. You and Angel would have plenty of privacy in a luxurious setting. Do you think you might be interested?”
“Hell yes but I’m curious as to why we were selected, not that I’m complaining.”
“It’s for couples. Only couples with a strong bond of love and willingness to work hard at that bond are invited to join. You have been deemed worthy of such an invitation.”
“Wow. I’d like to think Angel and I fit that description.”
“We do require absolute secrecy. You may only tell your loved ones that you are going off to renew your love. There are no phones at the resort. We keep it isolated from the rest of the world.”
“Sound heavenly”
“It is. We’ve had couples stay for months at a time. There was one couple that stayed for six months.”
“That must have been expensive.”
“Your first stay is free of charge. It’s a bonus for joining. All future visits are rather pricey. We must pay the bills somehow.”
“A free vacation? Where do we sign up?”
“I will make all the necessary arrangements. You will be transported there tomorrow evening.”
“That works for us.”
“We can discuss it in more detail tomorrow. Dinner is being served in a few minutes.”
“OK. Until tomorrow then.”