Chapter Three
“Almost done!” Cordelia said with a smile, tossing another wad of water-soaked paper towel in the trash bin. She tore off another sheet from the dispenser on the wall, folded it several times, and moistened the resulting bundle under the sink’s tap.
The little girl was perched on the edge of the adjacent washbasin where Cordelia had lifted her up, swinging her legs idly and peering over her small shoulder at her cleaner reflection in the wall length mirror behind her. “Face me again, sweetie,” Cordy coaxed her gently.
After Buffy and Xander had left to get Angel, Cordelia had led the small girl over to the study table and drawn out a chair. The little girl had climbed up into the overlarge chair with no hesitation, trusting the older brunette completely. Once she was settled comfortably on the edge of the wooden seat, she had allowed Cordelia to carefully check her for any injuries. Cordelia still never asked her name.
Willow and Oz had remained silent throughout the examination, content to just watch Cordelia’s tender ministrations as she continued to speak to the girl, smiling and laughing in a carefree way that they had never before witnessed.
Giles had taken the opportunity to retrieve several of the rare volumes from the book cage. He had been alternating between scouring their pages, cross-referencing certain passages and muttering to himself when Cordelia had finished her hunt for injuries, thankful to have found none, and taken the little girl to the women’s bathroom.
After using the lavatory and washing her hands, she’d let Cordelia try to clean her up a little.
The girl turned her head around and tilted her cherub-like face up, scrunching her eyes shut. Cordelia carefully wiped the improvised sponge over the little girl’s rounded left cheekbone, washing away the worst of the smudged dirt, tearstains and a small smear of blood to finally leave the girl’s face relatively clean.
Grinning, she playfully dabbed the wet paper against the tip of the girl’s crinkled little nose, garnering a giggle from her.
This girl really was adorable. Her face was still smooth and round in her youth, only just starting to become more defined, and her eyes were large and bright with the natural uncontainable energy of a child. But her delicate pixie features and light brown curly hair told Cordy that this girl would grow into the same beautiful angel as her mother, soft and lovely.
And yet there was something strong and striking about her high cheekbones, oval-shaped face and full lips that Cordelia could only guess came from her father. Her blue eyes were intense, penetrating. So full of intelligence and passion, so deeply soulful, yet twinkling with mischief, life and youthful delight. Cordelia wondered if she got those from her mother or father.
And what about that sweet shy lopsided smile?
Cordelia reigned in her wandering thoughts as she discarded the wet sheaf of paper and placed her hands on her hips. “All finished!” she announced, flashing the girl her megawatt smile.
That crooked grin reappeared, dazzling her, and displaying tiny pearly white baby teeth. “Thank you, Cordy,” the little girl replied very politely. Her smile quickly slipped away again though. Exhaustion, fear and grief were beginning to catch up with her.
Helping her down from the porcelain basin and setting her on her feet, Cordelia tried to comfort the girl. “You’re very welcome. And don’t you worry, ‘kay? Angel will be here soon,” she promised, and was glad to see another smile flicker across the girl’s features.
It was just as brief as the last, but she could see that her words and the reminder of the vampire’s impending arrival reassured the smaller brunette. “C’mon. Let’s go back and wait for him in the library,” Cordelia finished. She offered the girl her hand.
Again, the young girl took it instantly. In fact she had held tightly onto Cordelia’s hand almost constantly ever since emerging from her makeshift prison. The only exceptions had been during Cordelia’s injury inspection and the recent quick wash of her hands and face.
The youngster had stayed close to her side as they left the library, and Cordy had noticed the girl’s uncertainty around Giles. Her blue-eyed gaze had flicked over to Giles several times while they had still been in the same room as the Watcher, almost as if she was wary of him, more so than of the other strangers surrounding her.
Cordelia flipped off the lights in the bathroom as they exited, then led the little girl by the hand back down the darkened hallway to the library. She pushed open one side of the swinging double doors and held it. “In you go, sweetie!”
After the little girl had slipped inside, Cordelia followed. They passed by Giles at the front counter – still huddled over a growing pile of books, and still mumbling to himself – continuing back over to the center study table where they resumed their seats opposite the witch and werewolf who were now speaking quietly to each other.
The little girl stayed silent now, her eyes still stealing glances at the occupied Watcher, but mostly staring sadly at the closed office door. Her trembling lower lip was caught between her teeth and her eyes welled with fresh tears that she bravely held back. S
he didn’t let go of Cordelia’s hand.
Several minutes later, Cordelia knew that Angel had finally arrived outside.
She didn’t hear her Corvette pull up though. It was when the little girl suddenly turned to face her again, relief and happiness shining in her moist eyes and a weary but hopeful smile upon her full pink lips, that she realized the girl somehow knew, sensed, that Angel was close by.
But the young girl did and said nothing more to announce Angel’s arrival.
Despite her forewarning, Cordelia screamed a little along with Willow as they, Oz and Giles were startled by the library’s double doors all but exploding open, crashing against the walls bordering the doorway.
The little girl screamed too, but her voice was full of joy at seeing the vampire sprinting into the library. “Angel!” she squealed ecstatically, releasing Cordelia’s hand and jumping down from her chair in time to be scooped up into the vampire’s ardent embrace.
His muscular arms wrapped tightly around her slender frame, almost crushing her to him, while her much smaller limbs were flung around his neck in return. The sleeves of the leather jacket she wore dangled below her hands down his back. Her pajama-clad legs were half-wrapped around his broad torso, and she buried her head against his shoulder, glad to finally be in his arms. Safe.
“Oh God!” Angel hugged her frantically, one trembling scraped-knuckled hand moving to her back, holding her firmly to him, and the other cupping the back of her head as he pressed a relieved kiss to her soft caramel hair. “God! Sweetheart!” His whole body was shaking in anguish and intense relief.
Tears were streaming freely down his pale cheeks by the time Buffy and Xander finally caught up and ran into the library, only to be stopped, stunned, by what they saw. The growling volatile demon they’d found at the mansion was suddenly a distraught, emotional, and loving man towards this little girl.
Buffy and Xander were too shocked by the complete reversal in Angel’s behavior to do anything but stay where they were, and watch the vampire and small child. The Slayer now leant heavily against the counter, Xander again comforting her, rubbing his hand against her back, while Giles walked slowly around the center of the room, closer to the table and the other seated teenagers.
“I’m sorry, Angel!” The little girl was now weeping against his neck. “Daddy said don’t come out unless it’s you! I promised!” she sobbed, looking quickly over at the now-open cage. “He said give the keys to you! But my heart and my tummy said it was okay! And you and Daddy always say listen to my heart and my tummy! I’m sorry I broke my promise!”
Angel drew back to look her in the eyes, still clutching her tightly. “Shhh! It’s okay, baby! It’s okay!” He pressed a long kiss to her little forehead. “Heart and tummy is good! You did the right thing, sweetheart! You don’t have to be sorry!” he whispered emotionally, laying his stubbled cheek atop her small head.
Angel understood that her father must have locked her inside the library’s book cage to protect her, and made her promise not to come out for anyone but him. And he knew that that nothing would have made her break that promise, but her heart and her tummy – her instincts.
She had been raised to always follow her instincts, regardless of anything else.
Turning her head back in towards his chest, she rested her own cheek against his shoulder, closed her eyes, and finally allowed all the tears she’d been bravely fighting to fall. She cried; all of her fear and worry for her daddy, and Angel, and for herself. All of her sadness for her mommy. Her frustration, and pain, and tiredness. It all came out in fat salty droplets that rolled heavily down her cheeks, soaking the black material beneath her face.
The little girl’s tiny fists clutched tightly at the collar of Angel’s shirt through the supple leather covering her hands as her entire frame shook with sobs, and she felt Angel’s rough strong hand rubbing her back soothingly, lovingly, promising her that he would make everything okay.
Angel’s eyes were pressed tightly shut as he whispered words of love and comfort to the little girl, and promised to protect her and her father. He already knew that Emily was gone. The thick aroma of her drying blood that emanated from Giles’ office was overwhelming his senses, almost swallowing the soft rose perfume and natural feminine scent of Emily herself.
But his sensitive hearing could detect no heartbeat.
Unsteady legs could no longer hold them both up, and Angel allowed himself to collapse to the floor, hugging the girl tightly on his lap as she cried. Tears squeezed out from between his shut eyelids and fell silently down his face, the cool liquid dropping onto the crown of the girl’s small head.
His large hand caressing her hair unknowingly smeared the droplets through the light brown strands, and he just held her close, letting her cry, and making sure she knew that she was finally safe. For the past several days he knew she had been scared, and yet so brave for someone so young, not letting her fear and grief overcome her.
She had known that she needed to be brave and strong, so that her da could get her and her mommy to safety, and so she had been. She was so much like her mother…
Now, it was his turn to be strong. He bit back his own grief, and clenched his eyelids so tightly that no more tears could escape, vowing not to shed another until he knew that this little girl and her father were safe from the people that were hurting them, hunting them.
Until every last one of those people were dead by his hand, and the bastard responsible for murdering Emily was made to pay.
Slowly, eventually, the girl’s sobs subsided until they became little breathless hiccups. Angel cupped her face gently between his hands, leaning down to press soft kisses against each of her moist cheeks. “Hush, baby,” he murmured. His thumbs smoothed away her tears. “Are you hurt?” he asked quietly, receiving a small headshake in reply.
The vampire had already known that all of the blood on her pajamas was her mother’s. “Okay. I need you to stay out here for a minute, while I go… While I go check your Mommy, okay?”
The little girl nodded her head in understanding. “Okay, Angel.”
Suddenly attentive, Giles misunderstood Angel’s words, not comprehending the unspoken ones between him and the child. He couldn’t allow Angel to think that the woman was still alive, because he suspected that the vampire’s fury upon discovering that she was dead would be terrifying.
“Angel–” the Watcher began.
Amber-streaked eyes suddenly glaring at him made him stop, afraid to go on. “I know,” Angel interrupted brusquely, growling low in his throat. He didn’t give the alarmed librarian any more thought as he turned back to the little girl.
“You’ve been so brave, baby. I’m so proud of you. I need to leave you for a little while, but I’ll be just in there,” pointing to the office, “and I promise I’ll be back real soon. And when I come back, we can go home, okay? I want you to stay here with…”
He looked up to the seat next to the one she had been sitting in, and was surprised to see that the person the child had come out of the cage for, the person her instincts had told her to trust, was Cordelia Chase.
Stopping for only a brief moment, Angel realized that his own instincts were telling him the same thing. “I want you to stay with Cordelia. Will you do that for me, sweetheart?” he finished. The young girl nodded right away.
Angel rose easily to his feet again, lifting the girl with him and hugging her firmly before setting her on her feet on the wooden chair she had just vacated. As she settled down again, his eyes slid down to meet Cordelia’s.
The Sunnydale Razorbacks cheerleader was crying openly, just as Buffy and Willow were. There was even a hint of moisture in Xander’s eyes, which he hastily wiped away with the sleeve of his shirt. The stoic Oz was frowning hard, and Giles’ trained mind was still processing too much information to allow him to fully see the anguish of the vampire and girl.
Cordelia’s hazel eyes stared deep into Angel’s chocolate brown, and more tears slipped down her cheeks. She had never seen anyone so vulnerable, so desperate. He was asking her, begging her, to take care of this little girl. Trusting her with something extremely precious to him, and leaving his soul and his heart bared open to her in those dark soulful eyes.
She couldn’t deny him.
Didn’t want to.
No words passed between them. Angel didn’t voice his plea, and Cordelia didn’t vocalize her pledge to protect the young girl. The understanding was unmistakable, expressed clearly in their eyes.
Angel turned and left them, ignoring everyone else. Without a sound, passed through the open doorway that isolated the area behind the counter from the rest of the library, and opened the door to the small private room. Slipping through the opening once it was large enough, he closed the door almost silently behind him, his gaze immediately falling upon the couch along the wall.
Emily lay on the brown sofa, her eyes closed and face tranquil, as if peacefully sleeping. Her still beautiful middle-aged face was marred by streaks of dirt and sweat, evidence of the family’s days on the run from their pursuers, and showers only long enough to refresh and scrub away the worst of the grime. The dark blood covering the lower half of her body was still clotting, her body still cooling.
Her husband had left her and their daughter here not much more than an hour ago. Left them here, knowing they’d be found by the Watcher, because it was too dangerous to take them to Angel directly. He couldn’t risk leading his hunters there. So he’d left them here, alone, in the dark, his daughter locked away – all to protect them.
Angel had sensed something happening tonight. He had felt them nearby. Felt him, as he had always felt the younger man when he was close.
The vampire moved the chair that was in front of Giles’ desk. Drawing it up beside the couch, he sat down wearily, and dropped his head into his hands. His eyes were burning again, but his vow not to shed any more tears, to be strong for Emily’s daughter, prevented him from allowing them to fall.
“I’m so sorry, Em,” he whispered brokenly.
He forced his head up, finally looking at her uncovered wound. Gunshot. Near the center of her stomach. It had probably taken half an hour or more for her to die. A hospital probably wouldn’t have been able to help her – Angel could already tell that the damage inside was severe. The only comfort he took was that the bullet would have also damaged her spinal cord. She’d had no feeling in the lower half of her body before she died.
Reaching up a hand, he lightly caressed her smooth pale cheek, before pressing a soft kiss to it. “I’ll take care of them, Emily. I’ll protect them, I promise,” Angel whispered to her.
And while he didn’t know if he believed that a converse to Hell existed, he knew that somewhere, Emily was safe, she was happy, and she heard him.
Angel trailed his hand down to her necklace, lifting the token from the hollow at the base of her throat. He turned it in his fingers, and smiled bitterly at the memory of the day he had given it to her.
~ New York – 1987 ~
Emily smiled shyly at the vampire standing in front of her in living room of his own apartment while he fastened the silver chain behind her throat. Her eyes drifted quickly to her boyfriend standing off to their side, watching her nervously. She gave him a reassuring grin as she dropped her hair back against her neck, glad to see his lips quirk a little at the corner.
“I think I’m the one that’s supposed to be reassuring you,” he murmured softly. Her love, her purity, her understanding, and her strength awed him, as they always had, and always would. She was shy, soft-spoken, and yet she was the strongest, most compassionate, warm-hearted, accepting woman he had ever met, and he loved her for all of it. Her faith in him, in Angel, constantly astounded him.
Angel chuckled, grateful that the awkward atmosphere had been somewhat eased. It was strange that he was so nervous, when this was something that they all wanted. Emily’s boyfriend had spoken with him about this more than a month ago. He’d wanted her to have Angel’s protection. It was something that had been granted the moment the vampire had met the enchanting young woman, but both he and Emily’s boyfriend wanted more than unspoken promise. Needed more, because of who they were.
And somehow, miraculously, she had understood, and wanted it too.
His large pale hands took her left hand between them as he caught her eye again. “Are you sure about this?” he asked her. He’d asked her a hundred times, but the reply was always the same, and always delivered without hesitation.
“Yes.”
One of Angel’s hands moved back to the token of Aurelius he had just placed around her throat, tracing its familiar design. “This means that you’re protected not only by me, but the entire Order. I’ll always protect you.” His dark gaze looked out from beneath his tousled jaw-length hair toward her boyfriend now. “He’ll always protect you.” He returned to her jade-colored eyes. “No matter what, okay? This doesn’t bind you to him. Even if you were no longer with him, we would always be here for you, and keep you safe,” he promised her.
“I believe you,” Emily said softly, simply, truthfully.
The vampire took a deep steadying breath, before lifting her hand to his mouth, pressing a light kiss to the heel of her palm. Then, his face shifted; fangs elongated down passed his lips, eyes became a fiery gold, and bone thickened over his brow, nose and cheeks. Holding her emerald green gaze, Angel used his fangs to lightly scratch the surface of her extended palm, closing his lips over the twin wounds and quickly lapping away the blood he had drawn.
Emily never flinched.
Angel sealed the slight wounds with his tongue, and then abruptly pulled back, dropping his hands and shoving them into his pockets as he turned his vampiric face away from her ashamedly. The rich intoxicating flavor of human blood, even so small a taste, still tingled inside his mouth, taunting him, tempting him, urging him to take more. He couldn’t look at her.
And so Emily leaned over and kissed his cheek. She understood what he was feeling, but it wasn’t necessary. She accepted them both, cared for them both, just the way they were. The vampire melted from his face as he turned his astonished gaze back to her, and saw all of her emotions shining from her expressive eyes. “Thank you, Angel,” she told him honestly, and smiled happily. Then she turned to her hesitant boyfriend and hugged him. “Thank you, too,” she said, kissing him sweetly on the lips. “I love you.”
“I love you, Em,” he replied, an amazed whisper, pulling her deeper into his arms. His gaze met Angel’s over her shoulder, and he smiled, grateful.
And he held Emily close.
~ End Flashback ~
Angel had claimed her, placed her under the protection of Aurelius, to protect her from the darkness of the world he and her then-boyfriend had dragged her into. Vampires, demons, beasts, all would know that she was under the protection of Angelus and the Order of Aurelius. If they tried to harm her, they would have to answer to him.
Fingers tracing the fine white scars on the heel of her bloody left palm, Angel knew that the mark hadn’t been enough to protect her. He had never regretted marking her, claiming her, placing her under his protection. His one regret was that it still hadn’t kept her safe. Not from humans.
He shook away the memories, wiping at his eyes before the welling moisture there could fall, still determined not to break his vow. Gently, he took hold of the gold wedding band that encircled her finger, and slid it from her hand. Dried blood on her hand and the interweaving design of the metal made it stick to her skin fleetingly before it came free.
Angel slipped the ring reverently into the pocket of his slacks for safekeeping. Until he could return it to Emily’s husband.
Then, he reached up behind her neck, unclasping the chain. As he withdrew his hands again though, his fingers brushed her throat and he felt something flake away. He could suddenly smell the sharp reawakened scent of blood on the side of her throat. Brushing her hair aside, he saw the two small smears of long-dried blood, yet no wounds beneath the crusted marks.
And he knew what it meant. As he palmed her token, Angel recognized that the bloodstains weren’t there by accident, that Emily had deliberately placed them there. Her final effort to protect her baby girl. He understood what she wanted.
She was asking him to bite her.
A vampire bite on her body would prevent any investigation into her death, despite the gunshot wound. There wouldn’t even be an autopsy – her body would be cremated almost immediately, especially being a ‘Jane Doe’.
Sunnydale cops were stupid, but not completely naïve. The authorities knew not to linger when it came to a vampire’s victim, and no investigation meant that there was no chance that her daughter would be found. That was why she couldn’t have gone to the hospital. She and her daughter would never have been safe there, even if it could have saved Emily’s life. The people hunting her husband would have found her, and their child… She couldn’t let that happen.
Angel couldn’t deny her this last request.
A single tear escaped Angel’s eyes, but he no longer cared. “I’m sorry,” he repeated quietly, even as his features changed to show his true face. His calloused thumb brushed against her throat, removing the last of the flaking blood, before giving it one final apologetic caress.
And with his hand, he turned her unresisting head, and slowly, almost tenderly, he pierced her throat with his fangs. The cool heavy liquid dribbled onto his tongue and he fought the urge to gag on the dead blood. He wouldn’t disrespect her further by refusing to take her blood. One gentle pull brought a mouthful of her thick lifeless essence into his mouth and he swallowed it quickly. Angel allowed several drops to ooze from between his lips and down her neck as he extracted his fangs, and then gasped as another flavor washed over his taste buds, piercing his heart with fresh sorrow.
Though cold, dead, her blood was sweeter, even tangy, and he immediate recognized the taste. Rich. Life-giving. Nourishing. Fertile. Angel touched two shaking fingers to his bloody lips, and then dropped them to her stomach, lightly caressing her abdomen, low, over her womb.
Emily had been pregnant. She probably never knew.
The urge to shout, cry, curse, scream out loud, and tear apart the room roared up inside of him, but Angel stubbornly refused to surrender to it again. He had to remember his promise to Emily’s daughter, to be strong for her. For now. He would surrender to his emotions when he found the son-of-a-bitch that had done this to Em, and not even God would be able to save the bastard.
So instead, now, he rose from his seat, wiped all evidence of the blood from his pale lips, closed his fist tightly around Emily’s token, and with one last mournful gaze at the body he left the room as quietly as he had entered.
