The Next Best Thing. 2

Part 2

“Gettitoffme! Gettitoffme!”

“Cordelia it’s not ON you it’s inside you! And for the record, this is your fault!” Angel was trying his utmost to not touch the girl, because every time he made contact with her skin, she jumped before cursing in profuse Gaelic and he was getting piqued.

He couldn’t touch her.

“How the hell was I supposed to know newt testicles weren’t the same thing as lizard testicles.”

Her hazel eyes were blazing with irrational fear and the pacing wasn’t helping, not to mention the smell of her fear was starting to grate on Angel’s nerves. Only this time he couldn’t blame it on his demon.

Which to say the least, unsettled him. “Cordelia, we will figure a way to fix this, don’t worry.”

“I knew I wasn’t very good at magic.”

“Well why the fuck did you suggest it in the first place you geek faced watcher!”

Wesley stared at the fuming woman now glaring down at him and he had to hide the shiver. It just wasn’t right that this woman could wield the profane vocabulary and it only came out suiting her.

It was just wrong. “Angelus, stop cursing.”

“You put me in this shit Weslips! I will curse all I want with this pretty little mouth!”

Angel was still having a hard time trying to decipher when Cordelia stopped the talking and when Angelus began. At first the spurts of half words and half screams had been torturing until they seemed to find some sort of gulf in his seer’s head to complete sentences.

He didn’t know if he should be happy or sad. He was glad the constant taunting and mocking was gone from his head, but knew his demon wasn’t the politest or the easiest one to get along with.

He felt bad for the young woman who was now pacing erratically in the hotel lobby. “Cordelia. Sit down.”

He gently grabbed the woman by her shoulders and tried to guide her to the couch, but she jumped like a fish batting at his hands. “Don’t touch me dammit! It’s weird!”

He was about to protest when one hand was lifted between them and Cordelia sighed. “It’s okay Angel. I’ll sit. He’s just a little freaked out.”

“You would be too Cheerleader if you were touching yourself. Oh…then again maybe not.”

“Oh my god!” Her eyes widened as the mental images of previous nights ran through her mind like a mantra and the cackle in her head escalated to a purr.

“Stop this instant you prying demon you! That’s private! NO don’t LOOK!”

Angel watched with amusement as Wesley ducked behind his book and Cordelia’s cheeks flushed with soft pink before she dropped herself into the couch, her hands folded in her lap.

For a second he stood there watching her morph between aghast embarrassment and wicked giggles and envied the demon. Only for a second though. Because this was Cordelia. May Queen, Sunnydale snob extraordinaire and his new best friend.

Nope. No envy there. Clearing his throat and pushing away the very indecent image of Cordelia alone in her bed, he looked down at her. “Look, I know this is hard for you.”

“You have no idea peaches.”

“I’m talking to Cordelia.” He squatted down in front of her, her hands fidgeting nervously in her lap and he put his hand over hers and held before Angelus could yank it away. “Cordy?”

Liquid hazel eyes peeked up at him through thick lashes, the confused fear mixing with the doubt. His un-beating heart would have lurched if he had been alive. He so wished this didn’t have to happen to the girl.

Angelus was a bastard and this was a violation, that shouldn’t have been subjected on the young woman. Not to her. “He’s a bastard, but don’t let him push you around.”

When her eyes flashed with irritation, his grip tightened. “No listen to me. He’s not stronger than you Cordy. He might be in there trying to confuse you and trying to mislead you, but you are the soul Cordelia.” Reaching up he let the arch of his knuckles slide against her jaw as if to reassure her.

“The soul’s always been stronger and you know why?” The light in her eyes had already softened and so had the hands under his. “It’s because we feel and we believe.”

A shaky ragged breath was followed by a smile. “You should have been the fucking poet instead of William, you sappy piece of shit.” She blinked before pulling her hands out from under him.

“It’s okay Angel. He’s just loud and I want him out of my head.”

He held back the smile at the flickering emotions across her face as she leaned back in the couch. “Consider it done. Wesley?” He looked up to see the watcher riffling through the book. “Ideas?”

“It seems when the spell backfired, your demon was plucked out of your body and by mistake. Given the situation its probable it had to pick the quickest and nearest host. In this case Cordelia.”

“Always at the wrong place at the right time.” She sighed. “Just my luck.”

“This isn’t a walk in the fucking park for me either, Hazel.”

“Isn’t there a way to pluck him back! You know how it works; someone gets bonked on the head and loses their memory, or in this case their demon, and you bonk them back to make them remember?”

Angel’s eyebrows shot up. “Don’t even think it Cordelia.”

Wesley took off his glasses to rub his eyes tiredly. First they’d been up all night researching the Kisbath demon now poor Cordelia was playing musical chairs with her body between her and Angelus.

Could things get any worse? “I believe I should call Mr. Giles. Angelus is right I’m afraid. Smaller summoning spells are one thing, tampering with souls is not really my department.”

Angel nodded and stood up. “Okay. Call Giles, see what he can do.”

“Yeah, call the big British geek and maybe he’ll send the slayer down here to stake me and we can all just have a fucking reunion. It’s been a while since I’ve tasted slayer blood.”

“Oh god, shut up Angelus! I’m human! I don’t bite!” The throbbing headache that was left over from the vision was slowly escalating into another migraine the more Angelus argued in her head.

She wondered if she should just let him take the reins until she was feeling stronger and less suicidal.

“Well let me show you precious how well you can bite.”

Angel had barely taken in all that was shooting out from Cordelia’s mouth, before he saw her jump to her feet and stalk over to Wesley purposefully.

The young watcher had barely time enough to look up before Cordelia’s mouth fastened around the side of his neck, one of her hands sliding up into his hair and fisting there harder than he would have liked before her teeth came down.

Angel’s eyes widened in the space of a heartbeat and Wesley let out a very undignified squeal.

“Cordelia!” Grabbing the girl by her shoulders, Angel was only just able to keep Wesley from getting scalped as he pulled the struggling girl away, her hazel eyes flashing with hunger and her body rigid with barely restrained control.

Wesley had slid from his chair and from his perch on the floor he stared at the feral glint in Cordelia’s eyes and felt sharp sting on his throat. Touching the red skin where her blunt teeth had bit, he tried his best not to tremble.

Jesus Mary mother of Christ. Wasn’t it just wrong that he was totally turned on by that?

The struggling girl stilled. “Oh dear. Oh dear god I bit him. I DID! I bit Wesley!” Her eyes widened as she tasted the salt on her tongue, her own body shaking with the realization. “EYOW!”

Turning swiftly she almost threw Angel off his feet before grabbing his shirt and yanking him close. “Eyow! Eyow! Eyow!”

The vampire stood there staring down at the woman standing there wiping her tongue on the hem of his shirt and the constant whine that was building in the back of her throat.

For once the two century old vampire had no idea how to react, besides stare like a blithering idiot while Cordelia went into a disgusted fit.


~You asinine freak! You made me bite Wesley!~

~It was him or Angel and I do so hate Angel.~

~My TONGUE touched Wesley-skin you freak! I’m scarred for life.~

~Hey I just licked. You sucked face with him. Twice.~

~……how’d you know that?~

~In your head! Hello!~

~Shut up just please! Shut up!~

~No way! This is way to much fun. I never thought being a woman could be this fun. Look at him, he’s hard.~

Her eyes snapped over to the flustered watcher on the floor as he slowly stood up rubbing his neck and her gaze dropped below his waist. “Oh god, I think I’m gonna be sick.”

Angel frowned as the girl paled considerably, her hands still clutching his shirt. “Maybe you should lie down.”

Her face turned up and she met his eyes.

~Oooh, I am a rather handsome fellow now that I look up close. And I smell niiiiiice. Goddamn gorgeous if you ask me.~

~Oh hello salty goo….WHAT!~ “NO!”

Angel blinked as she jerked away from him as if burnt. “No?”

“No, I mean.” Cordelia took a deep breath, her senses on overload and swallowed thickly. “You’re right. I should probably rest. But not here. I’ll be…going home now. Yes.”

She walked over and grabbed her purse from the couch. ~Home where there is nothing to bite.~

~Still got that loofah?~


Angel frowned. “But Cordy you should stay…”

Shaking her head the young woman touched her aching temples before meeting her boss’s eye. “I can’t. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry I’ll call you if something goes wrong. I’ll see you guys in the morning. I just need to clear my head. Literally.”

Her eyes snuck a look at Wesley and she cleared her throat. “Sorry Wes.” Then she was running, the sound of her heels drowning the snickering of her newly acquired demon.

Angel sighed before looking at Wesley heading up the stairs. “Where are you going?”

“I believe a cold shower will…er…wake me up Angel. So that I can research this new…development. Ahem. Could you make that call to Mr. Giles?”

Angel could have sworn he saw a disturbing twitch in the British man’s brow before he disappeared without waiting for an answer.

With a sigh, Angel shook his head. “It’s always me. Call the Scoobies Angel, you ransacked most of their lives, but they’ll listen to you. Call Buffy, you consorted with her enemy, left her in the lurch, tried to drain her, but she’ll help you. Call Giles; you only ate the love of his life; he’ll be raring to help you.

I’d rather stake myself,” he muttered before picking up the phone and dialed the extension for Sunnydale.

Part 3

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