Air Conditioners.

Title: Air Conditioners
Author: Frazi
Rating: PG-13
Category: Humour, UST
Content: A/C,
Summary: Cordy asks for odd favors. This one is the oddest of them all.
Spoilers: Up till they move into the Hyperion.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: By all means just tell me where? GT, Stranger Things and Angel Oasis is a given.
Feedback: Like breathing air.

Oh for the last time.

I shifted on the little beach chair against and put my arm up over my head in hopes of increasing surface area. Enough to feel the soft breeze that I so desperately needed.

Okay. Whatevah.

I admit it. I bet I looked plenty stupid lying on the roof of an semi-empty hotel in my albiet sexy and please note: Armani bikini (I snuck them in when we went wardrobe shopping for Angel. They were black. He didn’t even notice) in the middle of the night soaking up the night chill.

Or lack there off, but I had been desperate.

In the confines of my apartment and the lack of an air conditioner, I had abandoned Dennis and slunk into the Hyperion to sit on the roof, in the hopes of feeling something, besides this heat wave, that was hugging LA like a disease!

It was *so* not working.

I’d been lying here twenty minutes and the trip of carrying the beach chair up here had made me even clammier. The night air wasn’t as chilly as I had hoped, even up high as the Hyperion roof and suddenly I felt frustrated.

Frustrated and pissed off.

Why couldn’t God turn on the big fan in the sky and let us poor people rest for a change? This heat wave had been on for about four days. I couldn’t take it any longer.

Wesley had proceeded to hog the only portable fan in the office during office hours. Fred had resorted to sitting at the window with a glass of icy lemonade. Gunn had confiscated the little Chinese fan that Angel had hidden in one of his drawers.

(Yes. You can laugh. He does look stupid.) That left me: hot, humid and sticky.

And Angel of course.

A wave of jealousy went through me.

The lucky shmuck!

Through it all. The heat. The humidity. The ikhy stickiness. Our resident good guy vampire managed to walk around as happy as a lark without any regard for us mortals suffering in the wrath of the sun.

I admit today, here and now, that being a vampire has its perks. The healing is good enough on its own but this would have been bliss; to not feel the intense stagnant air that weighed down on all of us for the past four days.

I growled low in my throat, shifting again to aleviate the dampness under my leg where it met the chair.

I wonder how he was sleeping. All snug as a bell, no thanks to his cold and lifeless body.

I suddenly sat up straight. “Cold and lifeless and oh my GOD why did I NOT think of this!?”

Suddenly, giddy about my plan, I jumped off the chair and proceeded to run back to the door that lead back into the stuffy hotel.

I nearly bounded down each step without any regard for noise (just for reference, I swear I tip toed past Connor’s room as always) and raced straight to his room.

“Angel?” The lump lay lifeless on the bed. God, his room was hot. I blew a soft breath down over my chest to calm my breathing and feel the coolness that it instantly provided.

I walked to his bed. “Angel?”

The lump shifted. I glared. How could he sleep at a time like this.

Ignorantly insensitive much?

Reaching out with my foot I poked his side.

The lump lurched and suddenly it sat up with a snarl.

“AHHH!!!” Cordelia jumped back nearly knocking into a table and the lump blinked.


“Oh for, who else you sweat deprived vampire!?!?” I couldn’t stop the panting of my heart.

Why the hell did he have to scare me like that? “Paranoid much you dead lump!? You scared me half to death!”

“I…um….sorry. You startled me.” He scratched his head and leaned over to flick the bedside lamp on.

Then he nearly jumped. “Jesus! Cordelia!”

I blinked and frowned as he stared at me. “What?”

“What are you doing!?” His eyes were wide and…..scared?

“I WAS trying to wake you up broody, but you sleep like a log. What’s your damage anyway? Can’t you just relax? I just needed your help with something.”

“You needed….my…..what?”

“Help.” He wasn’t even paying attention. I frowned. “Hello, Angel. I’m up here?” I waved my hand and suddenly his eyes snapped up back to my eyes rather than my chest and I smirked.

“There ya go. Now hold that pose.” I grabbed the sheet that had been covering him, wrinkling my nose in disgust at the extra layer and peeled it away and off the bed. Angel sat still on the bed while I proceeded to throw the sheet away and crawl up beside him.

I looked up and blinked. “Angel. You look catatonic. That is *so* not in fashion.”

“What are you doing?”

Dumb vampire.

“Angel….in case you haven’t noticed, its about as hot as a burning furnace around here. I couldn’t even breathe in my apartment so I came here to try and shack up on the roof, but even that didn’t work. So while I was laying there cursing the heat wave and envying your lack or sweat pores, it hit me!”

He blinked in confusion as my face suddenly lit up.

“What hit you?”

I rolled my eyes. “Oh for…an idea you dumbwit!”

His mouth slightly quirked in his half smile. “Oh no.”

I grinned wider. “Yes! You!”

He blinked again. “Me?”

“Yes you!. You’re roughly…what…sixty-five degrees at most….all year round?”

He stared. “What?”

“Your body temperature.”

He cleared his throat. “About.”

“Great! You could be like my mini air conditioner!”


I frowned. “Can’t you get past the ‘what’? Your vocabulary book give out on you already? I’m so hot I wish I could crawl out of my skin. Your coolness will cool my hotness. Instant heat wave treatment!”

I grinned. “Now. Take of your clothes.”


I sighed.

“No…I mean. What do you mean take off my clothes!?”

I glared. “You don’t have to yell. You’ll wake the baby. I need your skin against my skin. Hot. Cold. You know. At least I can sleep. That way I can wake up and be smilie! You want me smilie don’t you?”

He looked cowed.


“Good. Now be a good boy and strip or I’ll do it for you. I’m hot enough to not care if you want it.”

I saw the vampire gulp visibly then grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and pulled out of it before going for the drawstrings of his pajamas.

Yes. I am not at all excited about the prospect of his body against mine. Just that its cold. That’s all. Nothing more. Nope. Nada. Nope.

Oh. My. God.

Oh hell! I thought it couldn’t get hotter in here and suddenly I’m slapped with the answer.

Fire. In his eyes.

Before I did something really stupid like jump him without further thought, I crawled closer and stretched out beside him. His arms wrapped around me and I forgot to breathe.

Unable to stop the moan of approval I shivered as his cool body wrapped around mine snatching the scathing heat of the room around me.

Then the most amazing thing happened.

I fell asleep.

Wesley looked up as I walked into the office. “Morning Cordelia.”

“Morning Wes.” I looked up and met Angel’s eyes across his desk and gave him a secret smile that was reflected in his eyes. “Morning Boss.”

Wesley blinked at the chirpy grin on my face and frowned. “What’s got you so chipper this morning? We all hardly slept because of the heat.”

Angel continued to drink his coffee nonchalantly.

“Oh. Angel let me use his….” the vampire looked up his eyes wide, the cup stopping a few inches from his lips and I couldn’t help hide a smirk, “air conditioner.”

I looked at Angel with a level gaze. “I’ll just file those reports like you asked Boss. Call me if you need me.”

Wesley blinked at Angel. “Oh really? Do you think I might try it for a spot?”

Angel spat out his coffee on the book that was laid out in front of him, then coughed. “Um…it’s not…working anymore. I…uh…gotta get it fixed.”

Wesley sighed. “Too bad.” He shrugged and walked back to his desk. “Oh well.”

I ducked my head back into the office and grinned at him.

“Hey Boss man?” Angel looked up. “Do you think you can get that air conditioner fixed before tonight?”

His eyes regarded me with amused challenge. “I think I can manage that.”

With a chuckle I ducked back out and walked to my desk and flopped happily in my chair.

Gunn came into the hotel wiping his brow and sighed. “Man. This heat wave had better let up or I’m thinking of relocating.”

I put my chin in my hand and grinned.

“What heat wave?”

THE END – ????? -Frazi? You promised me a sequel…”The Following night…” *snikker*


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