Dead On Arrival 1-2

Title: Dead on Arrival
Author: Scorched
Posted: Dec 05
Rating: N-17
Category: Adult
Content: C/A, C/Aus, hints of B/A, C/X
Summary: A challenge. Details at bottom of page.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Distribution: AO, FSB, TIO, Cal’s place.
Notes: I’m back!

Part 1

There was something about Sunnydale that she simply loved. Maybe it was the hellish power it held, maybe it was the green green grass of home, or it maybe the fact it was full of clueless idiots just begging to be eaten. Perhaps, white fangs gleamed in the moonlight, perhaps she it was because she ruled it.

Whatever the reason, Cordelia loved the Hellmouth.

She hadn’t always loved it of course, but that was way back when she was human.

She sighed unnecessarily. That seemed so long ago now. “A lifetime. Literally.” The vampiress muttered continued her muttering and nightly walk through the cemetery. Those days were thought of with a fondness rare in her kind.

Going on holidays to some far off place, lazing in the sun, dining in overpriced restaurants where the dishes wouldn’t fill a five year old. She recalled having to be in before dark, always carrying holy water and stakes, and wearing plain clothes.

Cordelia chuckled as she ran a hand through waist length chocolate hair. She’d lived as a human for a long seventeen years, which by Hellmouth standards was a damn long time. Then, on the fateful day of September 23rd, the House of Aurelius came knocking and bringing with it her sire and companion.

Ahh, her companion. The little man who better be waiting for her at home, with a hot cup of tea and some dinner ready for her return. She smiled at the thought. Her poor companion had lost out when he took too long in turning her. He’d spent a good six months chasing her, lavishing on her his particular brand of affection until she’d cracked.

Then, after he’d gotten what he wanted, he made the mistake of leaving in order to make arrangements for her welcome to the family. After he’d left, her sire had quite literally come knocking on her door and that as they said, was that.

Her companion hadn’t found out until the next day, when he arrived at the clan House only too find her sibling placing flowers in her hair. According to her dear Darla, Angelus had gone ballistic and started tearing the place apart before the Master had booted him out onto the streets, making him stay there until he learned his lesson.

“Never leave treasures lying around Angelus,” Cordelia mimicked the continuously stated advice. “If a jewel is bright enough, then it will dazzle.” She giggled. Poor Angelus, what he must have gone through.

More to the point, what he was having to go through again. First he had to give way to Darla, and now he had to give way to her. It was his own fault, he should have turned her when he had the chance, not procrastinated like the lazy ass he often was. Of course, if he had acted correctly, then that meant he would have thought.

“Heaven forbid.” Cordelia shook her head in sheer bemusement. Damn, she got such a kick outranking her companion. Her, an ex cheerleader and year old vampire, outranking the Scourge of Europe. Just thinking about it made her snigger, particularly as there was a heirachy clause he didn’t know about.

Once a lower ranking vampire mated with one directly sired by the House Master, then the mate would automatically be equal. Naturally, it was more to her advantage that this tidbit was firmly kept from his ears. It amused her to no end how he remained clueless about that, especially after living for so long. Then again, Angelus wasn’t known for his love of vampiric customs.

He tended to prefer simplicity over complexity, and vampiric laws could be extremely complex. Most of the laws went over her head, but never mind. She was just a year old, what could anyone expect? A Harvard degree in the ways of the undead?

She stopped and frowned. Something wasn’t right.

This was Restfield cemetery, in the heart of the Hellmouth. She could navigate her way around this place blindfolded, she’d been here so many times. Every night in fact. It had some of the prettiest headstones and the oldest graves in Sunnydale, not to mention it housed her parents’ graves.

“Poor parents,” Cordelia wiped an imaginary tear from her eyes and sniffled. She had no sympathy for them whatsoever. People would do silly things like try to fleece a vampire out of a few big bucks. Still, as a dutiful daughter should, she regularly put fresh flowers on the graves and kept the grass tidy.

So yes, she knew Restfield cemetery better than anyone, and she would know when something wasn’t right. It was a little too quiet, too peaceful, it didn’t feel like it had last night, or the night before. There was a tranquillity that hung heavily in the atmosphere.

It was unsettling.

The vampiress picked up her pace in order to hurry back home. Angelus always told her to trust her instincts, to get out of places that didn’t sit well, and Restfield wasn’t sitting well at all.

Huh, maybe if she was lucky, she might find something sweet and cute for her sibling.


“Want me to walk you home?” Angel asked Buffy, his voice void of everything but the tiniest bit of hope. They hadn’t gotten much done in the way of relationship issues tonight, what with having to trap a demon and listening to a certain person complain. God, his ears were still ringing from the high pitched shrieking.

Buffy smiled prettily and basked in the security of Angel. She’d love it if he walked her home, but she hadn’t told her mom he was back yet. It wouldn’t make for happy time if her mom found her and Angel on the porch. “No, it’s fine. You need your rest.”

“Still haven’t told her, have you?” The vampire cleared his throat after the question, a noisy plea for her not too lie to his face.

The slayer bit her tongue and looked away, studiously taking in the few stars on display. “I need some time, you have to understand that.” She knew for a fact her mom would have a fit if and when she found out Angel was back.

“You’ve had time.” A whole month to be exact.

Buffy’s eyes hardened. “My mom’s only just found out I’m a slayer Angel, what am I supposed to say about this, about us, about you? Hey mom, you remember Angel, right? He’s the vampire that tried to suck the world into hell, but don’t worry. He’s back, with soul, and is trying to make up for it?” She shook her head. “She’d freak.”

Maybe Buffy was right. Maybe it was for the best if Joyce was kept in the dark about him being back. After all, it wasn’t just her daughter who’d had an up close and personal encounter with him, sans soul. Angel shuddered, thankful nothing had happened to Joyce Summers apart from a little emotional trauma.

“Look,” the slayer stated when he remained silent. “I just… My mom will need some more time. I need more time. I haven’t come to terms with this myself.” Deceptively fragile hands rubbed the chill from her arms. “It’s so surreal. Having you, standing there in front of me, after months of believing you were dead.”

How did she think he felt? There was definitely a reason he was back, but what? Did he really have a destiny? Was it here, in Sunnydale, with Buffy? Or was it somewhere else? The world was a big place, yet it seemed to get smaller every day.

“… I wanted to die that night.” Buffy said with a far off look in her teary eyes. “My mom had kicked me out, I was expelled from school, and had no place to go.”

How sad. He’d spent a decade or so in a hell dimension. It wasn’t hot, as expected, it was fine for a while. Then he’d started feeling safe, like maybe it wasn’t going to be so bad. Then he’d learned the hard way that a person makes their own hell. Whatever he’d done soulless, whoever he’d hurt, all of it had come right back on him ten times over.

The cracking of necks, the draining of blood, the heat of melting flesh… All done to him, by him. Of course, it ended when he got out. Well, the physical aspect of it did, but the nightmares? The nightmares plagued him hour after hour, leaving him numb and hollow.

“Look, it’s late already and I have to go. See you tomorrow for patrol?”

Angel nodded. “Sure.” He had nothing else to do.

Buffy’s smile was dim, almost strained, but still got his attention all the same. “Great. It’d be better if I meet you here. Giles and the others… They’re not too comfortable around you yet.”

No doubt they needed time, too. The vampire resisted the urge to lock himself away and hibernate for the rest of his existence. How the hell did he have the nerve to face people after what he’d done?

“Goodnight Angel,” the blonde was saying. “Sweet dreams.”

The vampire watched her leave and didn’t shut the door until she disappeared. He was tired, so very, very tired. Days, weeks, he didn’t know how long he’d gone without sleep, but apparently it was long enough to stop him listening to his girlfriend.

A hand scrubbed his face in a way to wake himself up, sadly it didn’t work and he was left feeling raw. Stubble lined his jaw, bags were probably under his sunken eyes, and he was sure he’d give a ghost a run for it’s money.

Angel’s shoulders sagged and he massaged the nape of his neck, trying to ease the tension built over hellish years. Sleep. That’s what he’d do tonight. Drink that bottle of whiskey left by Spike, get somewhat drunk, then pass out on the king sized bed he’d purchased when sans soul.

He was so lost in his own self pity, that he failed to hear the opening door.

Soft cool hands slid across his eyes and blanked out the dim light, a firm yet supple body closed in on him from behind and a moist lips pressed against his cheek. Rose scented perfume shrouded him and a slender leg eased between his. “Hi honey, I’m home.”

Angel didn’t have time to jump out of his skin before he was spun around and kissed senseless.

Part 2

Cordelia melted into her companion’s strong body and was more than eager to let the son of a bitch have his wicked way with her. She moaned when his tongue delved into her mouth and she fought for equal dominance. Her nails raked down his neck and the vibrations of his deep groan tickled her pink.

Angel was too shocked to actually think. There was a brunette attached to his lips, attempting to suck the life out of him while… “Oh God!” He squeaked when a hand cupped his balls and gave them a healthy squeeze, and his body traitorously reacted.

He was being sexually assaulted in his own home!

Part of him thanked every God known to man, part of him wondered how many men would pay for this, while the sane part struggled for the other parts to gain some semblance of sense before it got out of hand.

And into hers.

Angel grasped a set of curved shoulders and pushed the rapist away from him, while at the same time trying not to lick the taste of strawberries and cream from his lips. A crazy little chuckle escaped him as he blinked away the shock. It didn’t take long for him to pick up on the fact his attacker was a female vampire.

He reacted on instinct and a solid fist caught the vampiress’ head, sending her heavily falling to the floor with a groan and a thump. Angel watched as the curvy figure limply rolled to the side and came to a dead stop. Unfortunately, the mass of thick waves obscured her face and her identity, so all he could see was the hourglass build of her body.

It was obvious there was familiarity, otherwise she wouldn’t have barged into his home and stuck her tongue down his throat. He cautiously inched forward, just in case she was faking the injury, and gently brushed some hair away from her face. As he did so, he frowned at the sight of an angry purple bruise already lining her cheek.

She maybe a vampire, but that was no excuse to hit her that hard, particularly as she obviously meant no harm.

Angel shrugged. Just one more sin on the list. His eyes glanced down at the outfit adorning the very lithe body and decided it should be illegal. Dark brown leather pants perfectly skimmed long legs and a fluffy cream sweater hung from one contoured shoulder. She, whatever her name was, looked so touchable, that he just wanted to softly stroke the well-fitting top.

“Pretty.” He muttered and went back to moving her hair so he could get a look at her.

He looked once, twice, thrice, and then blinked slowly as he rose to unsteady feet. Panicked breaths made his chest rise and fall, and his hands became sweaty. Angel swallowed as he realised he was staring down at the unconscious and dead body of Cordelia Chase.


“Alright, alright.” A very tired Giles yawned his way to the door, all the while cursing the existence of evil and damning his duty. There were times when being a watcher was extremely inconvenient. A hand scrubbed his stubble shadowed face and he yawned again.

The knocking grew louder and more insistent. “I’m coming!” Giles yelled and fumbled with the key. When the familiar voice of Angel drowned out his battering, the watcher fully and quickly woke up. Surely the vampire wouldn’t dare come here without good reason, especially having received a heavy warning not too.

The door was flung open, from both sides, and Giles shot daggers at Angel. “You do realise it’s 1 am, don’t you?” Anybody human would have trouble being polite at having been disturbed in the wee hours of the morning. Particularly when you had work at eight the next day.

“I need you too invite me and a friend in.” There was something in Angel’s tone that rang warning bells in the Englishman’s stomach. Before Giles could issue an invitation, the vampire had took off back down the garden path. “You might wanna get some restraints.”

He knew for a fact Rupert Giles was going to throw a fit.

“I invite you in.” Giles left the door open in order to get his robe and slippers. It didn’t more than a few minutes and he was back in the living room, facing the vampire’s hunched back. “Would you mind telling me what is going on?” It was 1 am, the pleasantries could sod off.

Angel didn’t say a word and simply moved to one side, bringing the vampiress into the watcher’s view. “That answer your question?”


“Everyday is a winding road…” Cordelia sang off key and out of rhythm as she took each swipe of the brush with care and attention. There was no point to nail art if it was screwed up. Three strokes and that was another nail done. She wiggled her toes and watched in satisfaction as the light bounced off the vivid emerald shade.

This colour went perfectly with her new mules; the cream and green complimented each other just right.

Her hair was wrapped up in a large fluffy towel and her favourite fluffy robe was snug, keeping her warm from the chill outside. Pampering was just the thing after a night of playing bait. God, it had taken ages to get all the mud and grass off her skin, not to mention out of her hair.

“You’re welcome.” Cordelia mimicked the vampire. He hadn’t even apologised for winding her when he’d tackled her, he probably hadn’t noticed. Too caught up in the woeful eyes of Buffy Summers to give a crap about anything or anyone else. Oh well, at least she had a beautiful blue bruise to make a point of being careful.

“Ack!” She elevated a good foot off the bed when her phone rang. Who in their right mind would call someone at 1 am? Ooh, they were so going to get a piece of her mind. A newly painted hand snapped out and grabbed the receiver, “Make it quick, I’m not nocturnal.”


“No, I’m a figment of your imagination.”


The brunette sighed in disgust. There was only one way to handle a prank caller. Cordelia placed two fingers in her mouth, curled her tongue, and blew hard. The shrill noise echoed off the walls and she winced, even as she wished to see the look on the caller’s face. Bet he wasn’t expecting that.

The watcher swore loudly and held the phone away from his ear until the decibels decreased. Annoyance marred his face as he realised the cheerleader was perfectly fine.

Still, just to make absolutely sure, “Cordelia, it’s Giles…”

Her eyebrows shot up in shock. “You’re the dirty caller?”

Dirty… Never mind. Are you at home and alive?”

“Hello! Did you not call me at home, where I answered? I’m alive and kicking, Giles. If that’s all?” Damn, she couldn’t reach her feet to take off the toe divider, she’d have to stretch. She easily doubled at the waist and plucked the white foam from between her toes, grunting a little as she straightened.

Giles fell silent. “Have I, um, have I called at a bad time?” He severely hoped not. The girl was barely legal!

“What?” If possible, Cordelia’s eyebrows rose higher as she read between the lines. “NO! I was pulling the spreader out.”

If she had been face-to-face with the Englishman, she would have seen the tips of his ears turn red. “Spreader?” The question was squeaked and lilted with concern.

“Oh for the love of…” She sighed again, and this time in pity. “Toe spreader. Ya know, to make sure the nail polish goes on the actual nails. Anyway, why did you wanna know if I was alive and kicking?” Last she checked, she hadn’t faked her own death. Geez, wouldn’t that be fun?

She could attend her own funeral, steal the freebies, and run off with her own life insurance. Brilliant! Cordelia grinned and sniggered at the thought. Everyone would be bawling and she’d be living it up in Barbados. Or somewhere really exotic, like Thailand.

Just checking, no harm is there?” The last thing they needed was Cordelia Chase meeting Cordelia Chase. Who knows what might happen. Particularly if the dead one was from the future, or alternative reality. To say that could be dangerous was an understatement.

“No, I suppose not. It’s just weird ‘cus you’ve never called me after patrol before. Anyway, I gotta go. G’night Giles, sleep tight.”


Giles shakily replaced the receiver and slowly turned to face Angel, his face blank and voice toneless. “She’s fine.”

The vampire would’ve been able to hear the whistle in Canada. “I gathered,” was the dry response. “What do we do?” His ideas ran out the instant he laid the body of Cordelia Chase on the sofa. Now, his brain was running on empty.

“According to myth and legend,” Giles began to rub his glasses, “Everyone has a doppelganger. A person who looks exactly like you. Perhaps this is Cordelia’s doppelganger. Her vampire doppelganger.” It was the best he could come up with at 1:10 am. Besides, any other possibilities made his head spin.

A blind man could see Angel wasn’t impressed in the least at this explanation. The disbelief was evident in the way muscular arms crossed and brown eyes dulled with lack of amusement.

“Look,” Giles ceased cleaning his spectacles lest he rub them away. “Instead of us going back and forth, debating every possible answer, why do you not simply wake her up?”

Angel’s gaze went between the vampire and watcher, then back again, and never once did the hesitation leave his eyes. He wanted to ask why Giles never offered to be the one who woke her up. Having personal experience of vampirism and being rudely awoken from unconsciousness was not on his list of favourite things.

When Giles never moved, Angel unnecessarily sighed and closed the small distance between himself and the couch. He knelt down and refused to look at the lips that had been firmly attached to his. Thick fingers curled round soft shoulders and he gently shook her.

“Hey,” he couldn’t call her Cordelia for some reason. It didn’t seem right. “Hey,” he stated louder and shook harder. Part of him wished she would never wake up. The whole situation was crazy, but her presence here was even crazier. Fuck it. This Hellmouth was driving him crazy.

The vampiress never responded, and Angel took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled as his patience began to crack. “Come on, wake up.” This time when he shook her, it was done none too gently and she sleepily moaned.

Where the hell was the truck? More importantly, where was the truck driver? That man could cause some serious damage if he wasn’t careful. God, that man had just signed his death warrant. Nobody, and she meant nobody, shoved her head into a swamp and got away with it alive. No, it didn’t feel like a swamp, it felt more like someone had dipped her head in a vat of fog.

No wait, make that glue. She tried to move her head and God almighty! Thunder ripped through her skull and almost tor her brain in two. How much had she drank last night? Last time she had a hangover of epic proportions had been her first birthday, and Angelus had taken her to Vegas for the weekend.

It’d taken a good six days for them to leave. Three days of non-stop partying, all night fucking, exotic food, and three days for recuperation. Even the money they’d won in the casino hadn’t been able to soothe the headache. One thing was for certain, Cordelia now knew for sure vampires could still get bitching headaches and they really weren’t fun.

True they didn’t last very long, but they didn’t half hurt.

The attempt to comfort her head with her hand was unsuccessful, and she scowled in annoyance. What had that truck driver done to her? He probably decided to live out his sexual fantasies and had her tied to some ratty bed, in a flea infested truck stop someplace. Oh well, more fool him. Men would do stupid things like pick on ladies who could perform circumcisions with their hands.

“Aw hell.” Cordelia moaned grumpily. Where the fuck was Spike when a hangover cure was needed? Not that he’d give her a cure for free, oh no. Apparently, his hangover cure was worth a whopping $20 to friends, and $40 for his sire’s little woman.

Little woman? Ha! She’d little woman him. Well, she would once this headache fucked off someplace else.

Angel heard the slurred murmur and instantly gave the waking vampiress his undivided attention. He watched as a hand was prevented from reaching her head, then listened as she grumbled something about a little woman. It was more than disconcerting to seeing Cordelia Chase as a vampire, but hearing her speak? Somehow, hearing her voice made it nightmarishly real.

That truck driver had enough time to “Kiss your balls goodbye,” and the truck had enough time too, “Hope it’s fire retardant.” She could get her vengeful little paws on TNT and wasn’t afraid to use it.

Eyebrows belonging to Giles and Angel rose high in surprise. The vampiress may have the face, voice, and body of Cordelia Chase, but she certainly didn’t have the cheerleader’s attitude. Still, this was no time to debate the differences between the two. After some battling glances, it boiled down to Angel to make another try at communication.

He cleared his throat and earned a sarcastic roll of blue eyes in reward for a job well done. Angel replied by way of a blank stare that got across what he was feeling. “Hello?” He resisted the urge to ask if she came in peace. God, this was freaking him out.

A single hazel eye cranked open and locked with a wide chocolate one, and then the vampiress sighed in relief and muttered a name. “Angelus.” Thank God he was here. That meant there was no trucks and drivers, just a splitting hangover. “Thank God, I thought I was gonna end up with blood stains under my nails again.” The relief increased until it was almost palpable.

The use of his soulless name made Angel visibly start and he shared a confused look with Giles, who refused to react at all.

Cordelia once again tried to move, but fully came round when the restraints clinked together and chaffed her wrists. “Huh?” Her brow furrowed and she glanced down.

At first, both males expected a violent outburst or something of the kind, but a slow smile spread across her face and foggy hazel eyes turned sultry. “So this is how you wanna play it tonight? I can deal with that.” Chains and Angelus always went well together, particularly if he was the one in them. Still, did he have to use metal? He of all people should know how she felt about sore skin.

No matter what the fabric or who was tied down, she was always up for a little rough and tumble with her companion. It was her idea of a good time.

Cordelia purred, a rush of arousal dampened her core and a pink tongue rolled suggestively over blunt teeth. “Please let me go?” Sure they had an eternity, but why waste time?

If possible, Angel’s cheeks burned and he quickly looked away from the saucy vampiress. It was pretty clear this was not going to go according to plan. Perhaps restraints wasn’t such a good idea after all.

Much to the horror of Giles and Angel, the vampiress’ eyes turned teary. “Please?” She tugged her wrists and whimpered, her lower lip popped out into an incredible pout. “I’ll do anything you want if you let me go.” Fun was always promised when he got all domineering and controlling; she got wet just thinking about it. Maybe she should tell him the rule, just to see what he would do.

With any luck, he’d spank her for not telling him sooner.

Giles’ face exploded into ten shades of deep red while Angel could only gape. She had to be shut up and fast, before she said something potentially lethal.

Angel did the only thing he could and covered her mouth with his hand. Unfortunately for him and the watcher, it didn’t have the desired effect. The vampire felt Cordelia inhale his scent, which was closely followed by a breath of cool air, and he was helpless to stop the impossible blush spreading across his cheeks.

“This isn’t what you think.” Angel stammered, pleased his voice came out as steady as it did.

The vampiress arched an elegant eyebrow, purring her reply in a voice that sounded out a million and one erotic thoughts. Unsure of what she said, Angel removed his hand to allow her to speak. “Hmm,” hazel eyes roamed the restraints and another slow smile appeared. “You, me, chains. Of course this isn’t what I think.” Her twinkling gaze stated the contrary.

“Lord help me,” Giles muttered and resisted the urge to turn away.

“No,” Angel yet again stammered, “It really isn’t what you think.” Or want, he mentally added. It wasn’t what he thought or wanted either. “I’m not sure, but…”

Cordelia looked at him with an irritated scowl. “Why are you talking like that?” Angelus had the odd quirky habit, but none of them included nervous stammering. It was disconcerting.

He frowned. “Like what?” He was talking the way he always did, if not more.

“Like a teenage boy with his first Playboy,” was the answer. “All stammers and nervousness.” Angelus apprehension was so strong, she was choking on it. Cordelia tried to sit up but the restraints tying her down prevented it.

Yes, she remembered now. She’d gone home, surprised him, and got hit for her trouble. Angelus never hit her, apart from one tiny slap, but she’d deserved that. Every young vampire thinks themselves invincible and she had been no different. Then when she’d gone after Jorgan herself, Angelus went nuts at her for putting herself directly into danger.

Still, that was a slap, not an outright punch which left her unconscious. Cordelia narrowed her eyes at Angel and asked the question he didn’t know how to answer. “What’s going on?”

Part 3

The challenge…:

I don’t know if something similar was posted as a challenge before. I read a lot of challenges and fictions about vamp Cordy in another dimension or reality. What if Vamp Cordy ends in BTVS season 3 reality, co-existing with Buffy, Angel, Cordy, Xander, etc like Vamp Willow did at the show.? Angel is really attracted to Vamp Cordy (which is really hot and sexy, BUT not slutty) -B/A were dating at that time.- Vamp Cordy and Angel have sex before Vamp Cordy leaves. (that could be optional, but smut is always good!!)- Angel obsessive with human Cordelia and having desires of siring her. (Maybe he could hear Angelus thoughts on hi head)It’s silly, I know…….

Posted in TBC

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *