Part 12
Cordelia sat there staring at the computer screen. She knew whispering the whole story wouldn’t be a good idea.
Angel was probably going to yell once he found out she suspected Bob might be the bad guy, didn’t tell him, went behind his back to Wesley and continued seeing Bob alone. She decided the best course of action was to type a message for Angel to read. *Maybe I should hide until he’s calmed down?*
***
“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me. I’m afraid we may have gotten off on the wrong foot. I’d like to work past that. We only have a couple of days left until your retreat ends. You and Cordelia have already made great strides toward healing your marriage. I’d like to tackle this new information before you leave the center.”
*Do you even realize how many different ways I could torture you using only what’s on your desk?*
“Angel?”
“Sorry. What new information?”
“Cordelia’s health. Her latest revelation has left me a little curious.”
“Then why did you only want to see me?”
“Forgive me for saying but I noticed when you were first questioned about your affair…I mean your..encounter with another woman, you were quick to point out that Cordelia had met someone else as well.”
“Your point?”
“It makes me wonder why you didn’t do the same when she accused you of lying to her.”
“I found out she was sick after she found out about Darla.”
“That explains why you didn’t say anything then but I’m referring to the present.”
“The fact that she lied to me doesn’t justify my lying to her.”
“I couldn’t agree more. I’m just wondering why her lying to you isn’t an issue you came here to work on. Cordelia explained you were here because of your trust issues. She listed her reservations about you.”
“I remember.”
“I also listened to her confession about keeping secrets in your business relationship as well. You seemed annoyed.”
“I am..I was.”
“Are you angry with Cordelia for keeping her health a secret?”
“She should’ve told me.”
“Yes. She should have. I guess what I’m really wondering is did you feel betrayed when you found out?”
“Not exactly.”
“Why is that?”
“I know why she did what she did. I lied because I was afraid I’d lose her if I told her the truth. She was trying to…do what she thought was best..in her own skewed way.”
“I see so you don’t blame her for the choices she made.”
“It’s complicated.”
“Is that perhaps because you felt somewhat guilty for what happened?”
“Umm…why would you ask that?”
“Cordelia told us that she found out she was sick shortly after you ended your relationship. It would be understandable if you asked yourself what if you hadn’t pushed her away. She may have been honest with you. She may have looked to you for support.”
“It’s not that.” *Hell I only just found that out.* “Cordy still probably would’ve kept it from me.”
“Then why the guilt?”
“I never said I…it’s complicated.” *Cordy had the visions for me. She wanted to help the hopeless regardless of what it cost her.* There wasn’t much he could say that Bob would understand yet he didn’t think he could lie very convincingly either. “She was sick for a while. I knew about the…migraines. I should have realized that something was really wrong.”
“Why do you say that?”
“When she first started having them, she would take a couple of aspirin and she’d be back to herself in no time. I remember one time when she went dancing with some friends immediately after one hit.”
*She ended up being impregnated with demon spawn. Note to self – Find Wilson Christopher and kill him slowly.* “A year later, she would suffer after-effects for days. She even admitted they were taking a toll.” He ran his fingers through his hair.
“There was this time she…developed rashes. She thought they might be side-effects…from the medication she was taking so she hid it from me. It wasn’t until it spread to her face that she admitted there was a problem. It turned out…to be an allergic reaction to a new soap. I was so focused on what was causing it and then relieved when she was okay again. It didn’t even register that her first instinct had been to hide it from me. I should have been questioning it. I should have pushed. After my epiphany, anytime I started to retreat into myself, she would get in my face and make me open up. I just assumed she…”
Bob stared at the now silent figure. “You assumed she practiced what she preached.”
“Exactly. When she lay there unconscious, I was pissed. I was so furious at her.” He closed his eyes as his memories washed over him. The anger, the helplessness and the fear came flooding back. “After she..recovered, I yelled but in reality I’d moved on from being furious at her, to being angry at myself. The truth was I wanted to believe she was fine. I needed her to be fine. I couldn’t…I can’t imagine my life without her. How can I be angry with her when most of her decisions, right or wrong, are based on what she thinks is best for me, our friends and…the world in general?”
He’d almost said the mission. “Well, I can be angry but it only lasts long enough for me to say it. By the time I’m finished yelling, I’ve already forgiven her. Which is usually closely followed by my apologizing for whatever reason she’s given that makes her keeping secrets entirely my fault.”
Bob stared at Angel’s small smile. “You don’t seem very bitter about it.”
Angel laughed. “Have you ever seen Cordy smile?”
***
Cordelia was finally satisfied with her confession. “36th time’s the charm.” She was feeling pretty pleased with herself. Not only had she finished her message, she’d come up with a plan. She only hoped Angel hadn’t blown their cover by beating Bob to a bloody pulp.
They may have reasons to suspect Bob but it wasn’t anything concrete. Their best bet was to continue being the happy affectionate couple. They hadn’t solved the case yet. She logged off the laptop and headed downstairs for the women’s workshop.
***
“Ladies, let’s move on to last night. How was your evening? Cordelia, why don’t you start us off? You weren’t overly pleased with the restrictions.”
Cordelia snapped to attention. She hadn’t really been listening. She didn’t want to hear any more about how their husband’s failed to please them. Her sex life was one thing that wasn’t complicated. Well, she was still iffy about the whole biting thing but these women couldn’t help her in that department. “Actually Angel and I had..a very pleasant night.” She could feel her cheeks flush. “And we did not have sex last night.”
“Hmm”
“What? We didn’t.”
“I believe you. It’s just an interesting choice of phrasing. You ‘didn’t have sex last night’.”
“Well we didn’t.” She avoided meeting Valerie’s eyes.
“Uh huh”
“What? You said ‘no intercourse tonight’ so we didn’t.” The other wives started snickering. “Fine! Stop with the third degree already. We had sex this morning.” She blew out a breath. “Nobody said anything about not being allowed to have sex this morning! We didn’t break any rules.” She crossed her arms and stuck her chin in the air.
Valerie started laughing at her display. “It’s okay, Cordy. You don’t have to apologize for making love with your husband. You’re absolutely right. I made no mention of this morning. Out of curiosity though, you said you did have a pleasant evening?”
“Oh yeah. We talked. We took a bubble bath together. There was some impromptu wrestling followed by..very satisfying non-sex.”
“Do you feel you got anything out of the restrictions we imposed?”
“Not really. No offense or anything. Angel isn’t the kind of lover who focuses solely on his own pleasure. Everything we did last night, we still would have done plus a whole lot more.”
“It wasn’t just about sexual limitations. Mainly we hoped everyone would open up and talk.”
“I get that. I know Angel and I are here working on our trust issues but that’s not exactly accurate. We have very specific concerns about each other. Angel isn’t just..my husband. He’s my best friend. We have had our problems with secrets and lies but that’s more the exception than the rule.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Who would like to share next?”
***
Angel hadn’t been paying attention. He could care less what things the men wished their wives would do. He didn’t like the idea of Cordelia doing anything she didn’t want to do just for his pleasure. That’s not to say he wouldn’t do his best to explain any misconceptions she might have, like biting. He could understand her fear.
Vampire bites was something she was supposed to avoid, for good reason. It had never occurred to him that this would ever be something he could share with a woman. Feeding from Buffy had been an act of love on her part.
He’d made it as pleasurable as possible in his weakened state but he still hated himself for doing it. The looks of repulsion on her friends’ faces reinforced his disgust with himself. Even Buffy had seemed..almost resentful afterward. All things considered, he wished it never happened, at least the being poisoned and biting part. The decision to leave had been right. If he hadn’t, he and Cordelia might not have found each other. He wouldn’t have a family, a mission or a future with Cordelia.
His mind drifted back to the present. Not the bitch-session but why he was angry with the woman he loved. He had been so focused on the idea that he was right about Bob and excited about the possibility of getting to kill him that he completely overlooked the fact that Cordelia had been alone with Bob on several occasions. He had left her alone with the bad guy. Anything could have happened to her. Cordy had knowingly placed herself in danger and didn’t warn him. How could he protect her if he didn’t know where the danger was?
“Angel, how was your evening?”
“Fine” *I can’t believe she didn’t tell me. I could have been listening from the hallway, just to make sure she was safe. Why the hell did Bob need to see her alone anyway? The missing people were all couples. He should want to see us together. Bob actually seemed disappointed that we’re happily married couple – Woah! When did I start talking about our marriage in my head?*
“So you enjoyed yourself despite the limitations?”
“Yes” *And what the hell was supposedly so obvious to both of us? Aside from Bob being an asshole. I said I didn’t like him and I got absolutely no support from her!*
“Tonight we’d like..”
“Stop right there.” Jake now had Angel’s full attention. “If you’re about to..”
“Calm down Angel. I think you’re going to like this. We’d like each couple to have dinner in the privacy of their room. A nice romantic dinner for two will be sent to your room. How does that sound? Not too painful for you, Angel?”
“I think I can handle it.”
***
“Now that’s more like it.” This totally helped her plan. Angel wasn’t going to know what hit him.
“That’s it for today. I wish you all an enjoyable meal and a pleasant evening.”
***
“Let’s go upstairs.”
“Hello to you too.”
“Sorry. I just want to get upstairs before someone stops us.”
Cordelia giggled at Angel’s panicked expression. “Come on. I’ll protect you from the big scary counselors.”
“Pfft”
“Did you just pfft at me?”
“I can if I want to.” He grabbed her hand and started dragging the still giggling woman behind him.
***
“Why don’t you check the computer while I freshen up for dinner?”
“Cor, we need to..”
“And we will, after you check the computer.” He looked like he was about to argue. “Cooperate please?”
“Cor..”
She stopped his words with a kiss. She continued attacking his mouth until she felt him relax. Pulling back, she looked into his darkened eyes. “Check the computer while I freshen up. Dinner will be here in a few minutes. We’ll talk then.” Angel pulled her closer and began planting kisses along her neck. She caught his wandering hands. “I’ll be back. Now go.”
Angel started to follow her into the bathroom. He growled when the door closed in his face and the lock clicked into place. “Fine!” He booted up the laptop, grumbling. A lengthy message appeared on the screen.
Dear Angel,
Wow I’m impressed you managed to open this…sorry. This is where I’m supposed to be all confessiony. Sarcasm is easier.
So it’s like this. I thought it was a little strange that Bob’s office was in the basement when everyone else had theirs on the first or second floor. It’s not like I hid this from you. You were there too. Is it my fault you didn’t get suspicious? You are the Angel of Angel Investigations. Sorry. I really kinda suck at the whole apology thing.
Anyway, I asked a member of the staff about it. He told me it was just a temporary office while his is being renovated. What struck me as kinda suspicious was he moved down there six months ago and as you know the disappearances started a little over five months ago. I was officially suspicious but it was hardly enough to start accusing him of anything.
OK. I should have told you but you were already so growly around him. We needed to be cooperative if we were gonna be the next victim so I figured I should keep you out of the loop just until I had something a little more concrete.
I asked Wesley to dig a little deeper into Bob’s history. It wasn’t that big of a deal. So I told Wes to send his response password protected. I wasn’t trying to conspire behind your back. I just didn’t want you to go into overprotective mode.
Wes and Fred checked his bank records for the last five years and found something. It seems he wrote a check to his church every month until seven months ago. It’s still not exactly a smoking gun but it was now two coincidences.
There’s something else. This morning Bob said something that gave me the impression he’s been watching us. Don’t freak out. We knew someone was. It’s seriously creepy but we still haven’t found out what happened to those missing people.
I should tell you that Wes wasn’t happy about my decision to wait to tell you. He demanded I tell you immediately which I already planned to do. I just wanted something more to go on than his office being in the basement. As soon as I realized Bob was behind the hidden cameras, I decided to tell you.
That’s when I read Wesley’s message. OK so I should have told you from the very beginning and I’m sorry I didn’t. It just didn’t seem like a big deal at the time. I was afraid you’d be even more hostile towards Bob and he already thought you were abusive and violent. I know that’s no excuse and I promise no more secrets.
Please don’t be mad at me!
Love always,
Cordy
***
Cordelia had been pacing in the bathroom. She’d given Angel more than enough time to read her message. She was about to open the door when she head someone knock. She decided to wait.
“Cor, dinner’s here.”
“I’m coming.” She took a few deep breaths before exiting. “So what’s on the menu?”
“Shrimp pasta and…wow.” Angel blinked. Cordy stood there in nothing but a blood red scrap of silk. His eyes feasted on the exposed flesh. It covered her just enough to leave him hungry for more.
His strained expression brought a smile to her face. She walked up to the table. “Mmm. It looks good.” She dipped a finger in the sauce before bringing it to her lips.
Angel’s whole being tensed as he watched her suck her finger into her mouth. He dared not move for fear he’d throw her down on the table and ravish her.
“Mmm. Tastes good too.” She sat down and placed her napkin on her lap. She picked up a shrimp and popped it in her mouth. “Aren’t you going to join me?”
“Umm”
Cordy stood and pulled out his chair. “Have a seat.”
He numbly sat down.
She went over to the mini fridge and slowly bent over to remove a bottle of his special V8.
“Cordelia, I know what you’re doing.”
“What do you mean?” She sat down on his lap. “I was just getting you something to drink.”
“Uh huh” He refused to wrap his arms around her even though they ached to do so.
Cordy could feel how tense..and hard he was. He was doing his best to resist her charms. She picked up a piece of pasta and brought it to his mouth.
Despite his efforts, his lips parted allowing her fingers to enter. They automatically closed around them.
She slowly pulled her fingers out. “It’s good, isn’t it?”
“Not bad”
She opened the bottle and brought it to his mouth. “Thirsty?”
He hesitated before taking a drink. She’d bought his blood, heated and handed it to him but she’d never actually fed him. It felt strangely erotic. Angel could feel all his anger draining away. It was no match for his Cordy. He picked up a steamed carrot and fed it to her. “You should have told me.”
She fed him a shrimp. “I know. I’m sorry.”
They continued feeding each other, though Angel did more drinking than eating. They soon moved on to dessert. Cordelia took some chocolate frosting and smeared it on his neck only to lick it off.
Angel copied her actions. He continued to nibble of her neck even after consuming the chocolatey goodness. “You don’t fight fair.”
“You’re right. I should be ashamed of myself.” She started to stand.
His arms wrapped around her waist like two steel bands. “Don’t!”
Cordy wrapped her arms around his neck. “Are you still mad at me?”
“Yes”
She began planting kisses along his jaw until she reached his ear. “I’m sorry.”
His hand slowly slid up to cup a breast. “Let’s talk about it later.”
She smacked his hand. “We’ll talk now.” Her bottom lip poked out. “You said you forgave me.”
He trailed a finger along her collarbone, pushing one of the straps of her nightie off her shoulder. “I did?”
“Yes”
“Well then I guess I have no choice but to forgive you.” She leaned in for a kiss. “Don’t forget you promised not to do it again.”
“I did?”
“Yes”
“Well then I guess I have no choice but to try not to do it again.” She leaned in again.
“Not funny. I’m serious. You can’t..”
“I know. I am sorry and I won’t do it again.”
“Good.” His eyes roved over her body. “Can we please stop talking now?”
“What ever will we do?”
“I’ll think of something.”