Part 9
The cheerleader toed off her shoes, her feet aching slightly from the high heels. She threw her purse and keys onto the table with a thud that was swallowed up by the tense silence. The red glow of the neon sign outside blanketed the room in crimson, strips of muted red slashed across bed as the light penetrated the gaps of the blinds. The paint on the walls was yellowed with age and the scent of Cordelia’s expensive perfume clashed with the stench of a motel that had seen too many people desperate and alone.
She hated this place, hated what it meant, hated what it said about her, but these last few days it hadn’t felt so bad, she hadn’t felt so alone. Angel’s jacket was slung over the back of the plastic chair like it belonged there.
She wondered how long he’d been waiting here, how he’d entered her locked room, if he was as confused as she was as she slowly walked the length of the room towards him, one measured footstep at a time. She forced herself to stop a meter away from him and not run straight into his arms like she wanted to.
“I’m sorry Cordy.” He broke the silence that had been stretching between them thickly.
“For kissing me?”
“No, I won’t apologise for that, for wanting you, for how I feel about you.” Angel told her ardently, needing Cordelia to understand that this wasn’t just a game to him.
“Then why….?”
“I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that, I just…when I saw you and that guy…” Angel trailed off, rubbing a hand over his face like that could rid him of the seductive images that were haunting his mind.
“It made you crazy?”
“Big time.” A dry laugh slipped from his mouth.
“Crazy seems to be the theme of the evening.” She sighed.
“Do you want me to leave?” Angel’s voice wavered, unsure what answer it was that he wanted to hear. The vampire unfolded his arms, his hands itching to reach out and touch her again and again and again.
“No…but I probably should.” Cordelia said, her brain once again telling her all the reasons they couldn’t do this. Actually there was really just one reason they couldn’t do this, a very blonde reason that Angel loved, that Cordelia had heard Angel tell he loved. But that didn’t seem to matter to her anymore.
“I’ll go Cordy, if you don’t want me here, if you don’t want….” Angel said sincerely.
“I wanted you.” She cut him off. “I wanted you to kiss me, to….” Cordelia trailed off, afraid of the power her words held, she dragged her hands through her hair, her voice came out as barely a whisper when she said, “God Angel, I can’t stop thinking about you.” The same words he had murmured into her hand that very afternoon. Cordelia suddenly found the carpet at her feet very interesting.
The complete truth stood between them in the small motel room, an admission that scared them both but at the same time felt like the sweetest song to their ears. Want, desire…and something else tentative and unspoken that could easily turn the world upside down and inside out.
Angel was the first to move, to step forward with more confidence than he felt, scared that she would push him away again. With gentle fingers, not the demanding bruising touch that had overtaken his movements in the alley, he raised her chin so that she was looking at him, so that her hazel eyes had no other choice but to look into his. Angel brushed her hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear as he had done countless times since they had stumbled into each others lives, a silent apology for his earlier behaviour, for the angry slip of his control.
As he’d stood in the dark recesses of her room, surrounded by the scent of her absence, the guilt he felt at the thought that he might have hurt her felt like an anvil hanging around his neck but it dissipated with the understanding he found in her eyes. Cordelia placed the palms of her hands on his chest, smoothing over the fabric, her fingers tracing the hidden muscle and sinew and finally settling on where his silent heart lay.
The vampire opened his mouth to speak again but Cordelia hushed him with the press of her finger to his lips and a short shake of her head. She was tired of talking, tired of thinking. All they had done for a week, for five days was talk and circle each other pretending the tension that was brewing between them didn’t exist.
Five days.
It felt longer than that some how.
Cordelia had nothing left from a life she had adored and the man in front of her looked at her like she was his entire world.
This is what she wanted.
What they both wanted.
Cordelia’s arms circled Angel’s neck, pulling him down into a soft sweet kiss that tugged at his heart and felt like a soothing balm to his soul, a far cry from the demanding possession in the alley. That kiss had been fuelled by anger, by witnessing Cordelia at her most elemental as she’d moved to the music, but this…this was different and it had the capacity to break hearts and topple worlds.
He bridged the small gap between them, his hands coveting the gentle curve of her waist, holding her body to his. Seconds, minutes, maybe hours passed as they hungrily sipped at each others lips, tender passion that was an intoxicating elixir, no matter how many times their mouths met it wasn’t enough, would never be enough. Angel’s large hand threaded around hers, holding her hand in his as he kissed her with a tenderness that left her breathless and filled with longing.
Cordelia sighed as the palm of his other hand cradled the side of her face as though he were holding fine china. It astounded her how they could go from the aggressive brutal claiming of each others mouths in the dark seedy alley to this soft, calm, gentle…dare she think it, loving caress. Yes, that was how it made her feel, loved.
Pulling her lips away from him but not the rest of her, she couldn’t, wouldn’t move away from him, Cordelia ran a trail of hot wet kisses along his strong jaw and down his neck, her teeth nipping at the sensitive flesh there.
“Cordelia….” Angel purred her name like it was an offering to the Gods.
“I don’t want you to leave….” Cordelia murmured into his skin, unable to deny it any longer. “I don’t want to run away. I just…I want you, I want you so much Angel.” With a deep rolling growl Angel captured her lips again with a fervency that lifted Cordelia from her feet, his hands were like molten steel around her waist, her small hands gripped his shoulders for purchase but she knew he wouldn’t let her fall, that much she was certain of. As Angel kissed her, as he devoured her, as he slid his hands down the small of her back holding her body in his, as he deftly wrapped Cordelia’s legs around his waist Angel didn’t once think of Buffy.
Neither of them did. This was too sweet, too delicious, too overwhelming for either Cordelia or Angel to stop and pull away. To think about this rationally and deny themselves what they both wanted. As Angel walked Cordelia backwards, as his legs hit the side of the bed, as they tumbled down on to the soft mattress in a tangle of limbs Buffy didn’t exist, she didn’t exist inside the small motel room where vampire and cheerleader entwined their fingers and kissed.
Cordelia whimpered in the back of her throat as Angel pressed her pliant body into the mattress his weight settling between her thighs as though he belonged there. Cordelia’s small hands creeping beneath his sweater and running up and down the hard plane of his back, she felt the muscles under her fingers twitch under her feather light caress and it thrilled her that she could evoke such a reaction in the vampire.
They were forced to part as Cordelia tugged Angel’s sweater over his head, an annoyed growl slipped from the vampires mouth at the loss of her warm lips, the sides of Cordelia’s mouth quirked in amusement at the half whine half growl that had rumbled through him. She pressed a line of burning kisses across his shoulder, tasting his cool skin as she explored him. Her small hands mapped the landscape of his chest, memorising his angles and lines, locking away into her memory the groan that rumbled in his throat as her nails scraped over his nipples. His control tugged harshly at its leash, this wasn’t enough, he needed to see her, all of her. Needed to press her skin to his and brand Cordelia as his own.
Angel slipped the thin straps of her dress off her shoulders, worshipping the amber skin that revealed itself as he peeled the red scrap of material from her chest. She felt wanton and exposed as she lay beneath the vampire with her dress bunched around her hips, naked above the waist. The vampire leant over her as he surveyed her, his eyes hungrily consuming her, his gaze licking over the curve of her breasts and dip of her stomach.
Her sudden nervousness washed away as Angel captured her lips once again, more insistent this time, his arousal doubling tenfold at the sight of an almost naked Cordelia Chase. He felt her shudder as he palmed the full weight of her left breast, his thumb grazing over her puckered nipple as he claimed her breasts as his property. Her hands were moving of their own accord because Cordelia had lost the ability to form coherent thought the moment Angel had pressed her roughly against the alley wall and she hadn’t thought clearly since.
And god…she loved it.
She grasped the thick buckle of his belt and with nimble fingers divested him of the leather band, tossing it aside with a thud onto the growing pile of clothing on the floor. She unbuttoned his slacks and brushed the back of her hand over his hardness as she dragged the zipper down slowly, eliciting a low groan from the vampire that suddenly stilled his movements and slammed his eyes shut, a tentative touch that made him shudder to his very epicentre.
Cordelia watched as the last vestiges of Angel’s control flew out of the window as he kicked away his boots and pants, she gasped when he was revealed to her, thick and hard and aching for her. Cordelia wanted to reach out and touch him, learn him with her fingertips but Angel was over her again, dragging her dress away from her completely so that she was hidden only by a scrap of lace. Angel was breathing heavily which was odd because he didn’t actually breathe at all but as he looked at the beautiful young woman beneath him he felt needless air being sucked into his lungs just so she could take it away.
“You’re so beautiful.” Angel whispered his lips brushing hers with every word, his hands didn’t stop roaming over her skin, his mouth didn’t stop claiming hers even as she sucked in ragged breaths of air, he didn’t stop moulding her body to his, his desire laying heavily at her hip. Cordelia had been told she was beautiful many times and for many reasons, by her fathers colleagues that looked at her like she was a prize to be won, by the jocks at school that thought a few simple words earned them a grope in the back seat of their car, by her friends that thought beauty and money equalled power.
They were meaningless words to her ears but when Angel said them, when he told her she was beautiful as his thumb brushed circles onto the back of her hand, as his eyes held hers…it was as though he was the first person to ever say those words to her. “So beautiful….” The vampire whispered into her skin as he traced his lips down Cordelia’s throat and across her collar bone, she twisted her finger through his dark spiky hair, urging him to map her body, to learn the dips and curves that made up the sum of Cordelia Chase.
“Angel….” She sighed when his hands joined his lips on her breasts, his blunt teeth grazing her nipples with adoration, shocks of electric sparked her nerves alive and made her arch her back under his ministrations. Cordelia couldn’t seem to catch her breath, fast pants of air escaped her mouth as Angel kissed, licked and nipped a path down the valley between her breasts and over her stomach, his tongue tasting the supple flesh around her navel, whispering words of beauty and reverence into her skin with every caress.
Cordelia bit her lip as the vampire trailed his fingers over the edge of her lace panties, as he kissed a line from hip to hip, his unneeded breath tickling her skin and flushing her cheeks. Instead of removing the scrap of red lace Angel continued his mission of kissing every single part of Cordelia Chase, she whimpered when he pressed his lips to the inside of her thigh, shivered when his tongue lapped the sensitive skin behind her knee, her eyes slipped shut when his fingers massaged her firm calf muscles followed by a sweet kissed placed on her slim ankles. Angel was making love to every single part of her body and it was making the room spin around Cordelia.
Angel sat on his knees between Cordelia’s slightly parted legs and let himself drink in her beauty, her hair lay wild across the white pillows, her lips were red and full from passion, the deliciously full curve of her breasts, the slight feminine swell of her stomach, red lace that shielded him from what he craved, the same legs he had stood mesmerised by in this very room a few days ago, long and golden and quivering with desire. Desire for him. Angel felt another surge of arousal shoot to his groin, this golden goddess spread before him was the most beautiful, intoxicating woman he had ever known. He wanted to taste her, to bury his face between her thighs, to feel those long, long legs gripping his sides, to have her fingers grasp at his back, to feel her nails digging into his shoulders.
“Angel?” Cordelia whispered feeling a little self-conscious when the vampire had sat merely looking at her for what felt like hours, his gaze snapped to hers and the desire and passion that swam in his dark eyes astounded her, she bit her lip in anticipation as Angel peeled away the last remnant of her clothing, his eyes never leaving hers when she was finally completely naked before him. He dropped a kiss on to her belly, another on her hip bone, his hands running over her ribs and skirting the sensitive underside of her breasts.
“Oh God….” Cordelia moaned when his teeth grazed roughly over the inside of her thigh, so close to where they both yearned for him to be. His tongue snaked out and soothed the non-existent bite mark. Her scent surrounded Angel, arousal, desire and pure woman coiled around his senses and he couldn’t wait anymore, he had to taste her. Cordelia moaned loudly, her hips flying off the bed as the vampire buried his face between her thighs.
She cried out madly as his lips and tongue devoured her most intimate flesh, Cordelia had never felt anything like this before, so raw and all consuming, so wanton and electric that her fingers grasped wildly at the white cotton sheets she lay on for purchase. It was so sudden and so much, molten heat at the base of her belly, licking fission’s of desire across her thighs and flooding her sex with moisture that made Angel groan hungrily as he continued to devour her as though her essence alone could sate the ever present itch in his fangs.
Cordelia’s breath hitched frantically in her throat as her world began to fracture and rebuild itself around her before she was ready for it, the cheerleader grasped frantically at Angel’s hair, her hips desperately arching into him for more, her thighs were shaking as he lapped greedily at her core, long slow caresses that made her pant wildly just from the mere thought that Angel was doing this to her, making her feel as though she were about to shatter into a million pieces. She felt like liquid heat, no longer Cordelia Chase, not Queen C, not the pitiful girl who had lost everything but her pride, she was fire and ice on the brink of something familiar and unknown….
“Ahhhhhh……. Cordelia keened as her back arched sharply off the bed, the universe shrinking and contracting as she wailed her orgasm into the motel room, shaking as wave after wave of sweet pleasure rolled through her body until Cordelia was sure she was going to pass out from the ecstasy.
“Sweet Mary mother of god.” The cheerleader murmured when the world finally came back into focus slowly, Angel chuckled from where he was planting wet kisses over her belly, his arms wrapped around her as though he feared she was going to run away from him.
“You’re amazing.” He murmured hotly as he blazed a path over her skin, his tongue snatching the small bead of sweat that rolled down between her breasts. “Beautiful…wild…delicious….”
“Angel….” Cordelia sighed as she threaded her fingers through the vampire’s hair, a need still burning inside of her. They kissed languidly, she could taste herself on his lips but Cordelia didn’t care because this was Angel and she didn’t care about anything else. Her hands slid over his back, grasping the taut globes of his butt, her nails raking over his flesh causing him to buck against her wildly. “I want you.” She whispered into his ear, her teeth tugging at his earlobe then soothing the area with her tongue.
Angel wasn’t sure he was going to be able to hold out much longer, he’d almost lost himself just by watching Cordelia fly apart under his mouth and now her hot lips were sucking at the sensitive flesh behind his ear while her warm hand swept around his hip…his restraint went to hell when Cordelia’s fingers closed around his erection. With a groan that rattled the windows Angel buried his face into Cordelia’s neck, his hips moving of their own accord as she touched him inquisitively, learning what made him whimper, what made him shudder, what made him purr, what made him growl.
Oh god she loved it when he growled. Deep rumbling vibrations that echoed through her breasts all the way down to her fingers and toes.
Angel knew that if she kept touching him like that this was going to be over far sooner then he wanted it to be, he needed to be inside, to feel his flesh gloved in hers, to move his body with hers and make Cordelia his in the sweetest way known to man and demon alike. Cordelia instinctively knew what he needed because she needed it too, she grasped him closer to her, her legs wrapping urgently around his back as her hips arched up towards his, gasping when his desire rubbed against hers.
“Cordy….” He needed to know that this was what she really wanted, if it was him that she wanted.
“Please Angel….” She dug her heels into his back to spur him on.
The vampire’s lips claimed Cordelia’s as he slowly entered her, one exquisite inch at a time with a gentleness that made Cordelia want to weep, Angel stilled his movements when he felt the flimsy barrier of her virginity blocking his path. He hadn’t even contemplated that his was Cordelia’s first time.
“Don’t stop….” Cordelia gasped, her nails digging into the muscles of his back.
“I don’t want to hurt you.” He said raggedly, his arms shaking as he forced himself to keep still, to wait.
“You won’t…I trust you.” She tugged his bottom lips between her teeth, her legs fruitlessly trying to bring him further into her.
“Are you sure….?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything.” At that moment Cordelia knew that she was falling in love with Angel, she knew and it made her want to weep bittersweet tears because no matter how much she wanted to pretend he was, Cordelia knew he wasn’t hers. As he gently took away her virginity, swallowing her gasp of discomfort with tender kisses and brushing away the sudden tear that tumbled from her eye Cordelia felt the unfairness of life squeezing tightly around her heart.
Angel was inside her, making love to her, making her heart and body sing with ecstasy but he loved another…he loved Buffy Summers.
“Cordy?” Angel whispered as he saw a heartbreaking wash of sorrow overcome her beautiful face.
“I’m OK Angel, I’m OK.” She reassured him, the sharp jolt of pain she had felt as he filled her completely ebbing away slowly, now if only the ache in her heart would too.
“Are you….”
“Make love to me Angel.” She begged him hoarsely, even if he was gone in the morning he would be hers tonight.
Angel continued to watch her with concern for a moment until Cordelia shifted her hips instinctively, a sudden movement that made them both groan and slam their eyes shut with pleasure. The vampire moved slowly, a languid pace that made Cordelia hunger for something she couldn’t put into words. Her legs tightened around his waist, her small hands grasping for purchase on his back as she began to match his rhythm, slow and thick like molasses, infinite, never ending and like nothing she had ever felt before.
The demon raged inside of Angel to take her hard, imprint his mark on her breasts, to slam into her and make her scream but he tried his best to ignore the beast within, Cordelia deserved better than that, they both did but Angel was beginning to lose himself as Cordelia writhed under him, a desperate goddess he could worship for the rest of his life. She was surrounding him, tight and hot and flushed with desire and need, her lips parted and panting as Angel sipped soft kisses from them.
Cordelia deserved the world and Angel wanted to be the one to give it to her, to show her the wonders of the night, to let her walk free in the sunlight, to make her laugh, make her cry, he wanted to be the man that gave her everything.
She gasped into his mouth when Angel grasped her thighs and shifted position inside her, the gentle yielding pleasure she had been swimming in replaced by something urgent and all consuming that burned in her womb and arched her back off the bed, intense and unexpected, it made every molecule in Cordelia’s body shudder and prickle.
“Oh god….” She moaned loudly into the room where the only sounds were the soft thud of the headboard, flesh moving against flesh and the ragged breathing of a young woman who felt as though she were being turned inside out by pure pleasure. “God Angel…more…please….”
Angel couldn’t deny her as he sped up his pace, the whispers of his demon quieting as he took over her body, declaring her his with the thrust of his hips and the pull of his lips, every muscle in the vampires body taut and ready to break as they danced together through the second circle of hell.
Cordelia couldn’t breathe, didn’t want to breathe, didn’t want to spend a single moment of her life without Angel inside her, making her feel like this, having his strong arms banded around her back, his face buried into the crook of her neck as though she was the only thing in his world. His body was moving on pure instinct, lifting her slightly off the bed as he greedily pressed her against him, her thighs desperately gripping his sides as the angle of their anchoring burst shards of light behind her eyelids with every movement they made.
No longer were they vampire and cheerleader, demon and girl, but two inflamed entities, souls meeting and moving together in search of a mutual goal, hot and slick and in complete unison, attempting to seep inside each others skin and lodging firmly in each others hearts.
Cordelia’s eyes flew open as her world flew apart for the second time that evening, the whisper soft caress of Angel’s thumb glancing across the swollen bud of her desire snapping the gossamer thread inside her. She keened loudly, her hips crashing against his roughly, hard and fast as Cordelia lost control, as Angel felt his release tingling at the base of his spine, losing themselves in each others arms with a fierceness neither of them had expected but both of them welcomed. Cordelia was blind and shaking, her release sudden and overwhelming as she left her body and surrendered her sweet rapture.
Angel roared into the valley between her breasts as he pistoned one last time into her, her inner walls clenching around him, urging him to fall just as she had and Angel could no longer resist, his hips jerking as his culmination crashed over him, pouring out of him and into her with a power that made the vampire gasp for unneeded breath and bite Cordelia’s shoulder with blunt teeth, white heat sweeping through him until he joined Cordelia in the languid plane that she was floating on.
Angel stirred slowly to the tender feeling of delicate hands running over his shoulders and back, a comforting caress that only a woman knows how to give, to calm the soul and ease the quiet storm. He could hear Cordelia’s heart still drumming wildly in her chest with the aftermath of her release, he closed his eyes and savoured the sound, she was life, woman, the earth moon and sun, the ebb and rise of the tide, an elemental creature that cushioned his cold body and wrapped around his soul with every moment he spent in her presence.
He pressed a kiss to the full breast his cheek was pillowed on, his body felt heavy and sated, for now at least. Realising he must be crushing her beneath him Angel shifted to move but Cordelia refused to let him move, gripping her still entwined legs tighter around his waist, her hands anchored into his hair.
“Don’t leave me yet.” Cordelia whispered breathlessly, keeping him within her, around her for as long as she could. Angel lifted his head from her chest, his eyes searching hers for a sign that she now regretted what they had done. He could find none but the sad smile that shadowed her beautiful face twisted his heart.
“I’m not going anywhere.” Angel promised her, he kissed Cordelia with languid vigour, trying show her all the things he couldn’t put into words. She sighed when he once again rested his head to the safe haven of her breasts, frightened to let each other go.
***
The night was silent as Cordelia stared out of her motel window, she traced the hurried path of a single rain drop as it slid down the glass, her fingertip mirroring it’s movements. She shivered slightly, the thin white sheet had wrapped around her body doing little to stave off the slight chill of the room. Cordelia had fallen asleep in Angel’s arms, a deep sated slumber for a few hours before she awoke, although her body was tired her brain was not, forcing her to leave the comforting circle of Angel’s still embrace to a place where she could think clearly away from the vampire’s overwhelming presence.
The small distance hadn’t helped as she stood staring blindly out into the dark parking-lot, the red neon light had been switch off hours ago leaving nothing but humming night that would soon be replaced by golden sunlight and his absence.
“Cordy?” Angel’s confused sleep rough voice sounded behind her, a low bass timbre that would forever make goosebumps skirt over her skin, even its simple memory would.
“It’s starting to rain.” She murmured for no reason other than it was the only thing her brain could focus on fully. Cordelia heard the creak of the mattress springs as Angel dragged himself off the bed, her eyes slipping shut as the vampire slipped his arms around her from behind, she couldn’t stop herself from leaning against him, her hands travelling up and down the soft steel of the forearms that encircled her waist.
Angel kissed her naked shoulder, when he’d woken and found a horribly empty space next to him he had panicked she had fled the motel until he saw her standing by the window, swathed in white, dark wild hair thoroughly ravished falling down her back in chocolate waves, she was beauty, she was desire, she was…love.
“The sun will be up soon.” She whispered, not wanting to say the words out loud but unable to keep them inside her any longer.
“I know.” Angel rested his chin on the top of her head, knowing exactly what thoughts had made her leave the refuge of the bed.
“The sun will come up and tomorrow you’ll make up with Buffy, I’ll go back to deciding which guy I want to make Homecoming King and it’ll be like this never happened.” Cordelia tried to sound nonchalant but the emotion that crept into her voice betrayed her turmoil.
“And if I don’t want to pretend this didn’t happen?” He murmured softly, Cordelia wanted to believe him, believe that she was the only girl his arms would ever hold.
“Every pleasure has its price, Angel.”
“For you it’s one I’m willing to pay.” Angel tightened his arms around her, absorbing her into his very soul as they watched the rain fall lightly outside.
The sun would be up soon but all slayers and demons in the world couldn’t drag Angel from this room.
From Cordelia.
From the woman that was stealing his heart.