Part 10
Cautiously, Cordelia peered at Wesley through the window of the office. She hid around the corner, like a three-year-old hiding from angry parents. She bit her lip, chewing on it for a minute, contemplating her problem. She had to talk to Wesley, but she really, really didn’t want to.
The rest of the gang was gone. Fred had gone out on an errand for Wesley, and Gunn and Angel had gone to dispatch a demon from a vision she’d just had. All of them would be gone for at least an hour, giving her plenty of time to talk to Wesley. And yet, she procrastinated.
After a moment more of hesitation, she straightened up and took a deep breath, running fingers through her tousled hair. Forcing herself to move, she walked into the office and stood in front of Wesley’s desk, clasping her hands behind her back nervously.
Wes looked up as soon as she walked in. “Cordelia!” he said, smiling at her. “Can I help you with something?”
She smiled at him, though it was wobbly, and sat down in front of him, perched on the edge of the chair.
“I really need to talk to you, Wesley,” she said, the worry obvious in her voice. “This bite, the claiming bite from Sebastian, is doing some weird things to me. It isn’t going away.”
Her eyes were wide, frightened.
Wesley’s eyes widened. “Oh, Cordelia. I was afraid of this.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” she said, obviously desperate.
“I didn’t notice the signs, Cordy. I’m so sorry. I was busy researching how to kill or trap Sebastian, and you seemed okay, so I just . . .”
“Nevermind,” Cordelia said, shaking her head and sitting back down. “I should’ve come to you. What do you know?”
He stood up, striding across the room and pulling a book off the shelf. He walked back to the desk, flipping back a few pages in his notebook.
Finally, he looked up at her. “I researched vampire claiming bites right after Sebastian attacked you.” He consulted his notes. “It seems that vampires claiming humans can be a tricky thing. If the claim isn’t done completely, the victim will crave, um, physical satisfaction until the claim is completed by the original vampire or another one. If the human isn’t relieved, he or she will eventually go insane with lust.”
Insane with lust? Every time she was with Angel, the craving went away for awhile, but later, it came back and stronger than before. It had become more difficult to control herself. Today, she almost blacked out and Angel had to follow through with it
“There’s more, Wesley,” she said softly, not wanting to meet his eyes.
“Does this have anything to do with what’s been going on between you and Angel?” he said quietly.
Her eyes bugged out and suddenly, her mouth was dry. “M-me and Angel?” she croaked. “There’s nothing between me and Angel!”
Wesley raised an eyebrow sardonically. “Cordelia, please,” he said. “Do you really think that the two of you could sneak off into closets and dark corners multiple times a day and we wouldn’t figure out what’s going on?”
“You saw us?” she squeaked.
Wesley blushed. “In the basement, last week. I went to look for you, but you were, um, occupied.”
“Oh, god,” she whispered, mortified. “You aren’t angry?” she continued after a moment
“Angry?” he seemed surprised. “Why would I be upset? There are obviously strong feelings between you. It’s not my business if you decide to act on them. You’re both responsible adults and you know what you’re getting into. Besides, it seems as though being with him is helping to stave off the insanity.”
“I can’t help myself, Wesley. I get overwhelmed with lust. These wounds in my neck start to throb, and my mind gets foggy, and I can’t think about anything except being . . . um, taken. . . by a vampire. Any vampire.” She stood up and began to pace in front of his desk. “Yesterday, when we fought those fledglings, it was all I could do not to grab one and climb on top of him right there. I had enough sense to drag Angel off instead.”
“Does being with Angel help you?”
She nodded. “Every time I’m with Angel, the craving goes away, but it comes back again after awhile. And it keeps getting worse. I have to be with him more and more often, and every time, it comes on stronger.”
Wesley was thoughtful. “Has Angel ever bitten you, Cordelia?”
She hesitated. “Yes, once. At the ballet, when we were possessed by those spirits.”
He frowned. “Then it seems that you have two unfinished claims on you. If Angel had finished his claim, you’d be bonded to him, and you would be all right. Linked to Angel, but you wouldn’t be so frantic.”
“So what am I supposed to do?” she said, sitting back down in front of him. “Can’t you find a way to remove the bond, somehow?”
He shook his head. “I tried, Cordy. The only way I know of to remove Sebastian’s influence is to kill him. There might be another way, but I couldn’t find anything.”
“Why wouldn’t Angel have said anything about me being in danger?” she was hurt by the thought that he wouldn’t tell her something so important.
“He probably doesn’t know,” Wesley said simply. “According to what I’ve read, most vampires don’t know the effects of a claim on a human because most never want that kind of connection with one. It’s well known among the vampire community what claiming does to another vampire, but to a human? And honestly,” he continued, “I doubt that Angelus would have cared to know at all.”
“Why not?”
“He killed Sebastian’s human lover, remember? There was no time for her to get to the point you are at now. The claiming bite was a way for Angelus to thumb his nose at Sebastian. A mark left on her body as a final humiliation. Angelus probably never knew the effects that an unfinished claiming would have on a human, or else he probably would’ve tortured her like this.”
Her mind raced through her options. She didn’t have many. One idea jumped out at her, and she tried to ignore it, but it wouldn’t go away.
“What would happen to me if I were claimed?” she asked cautiously. “Would I be bound to that vampire forever? Can I get, um, divorced? What will happen if he dies or abandons me?”
“Cordelia,” Wesley said, holding his hand up to stem the flow of her words. “You aren’t seriously considering this, are you? Being claimed is a strong bond. From what I’ve read, you’ll experience physical pain if you aren’t in regular physical contact with your vampire mate. You’ll need him to feed from you, and you may even have to feed from him. This isn’t something you want.”
“So I just have to wait until we kill Sebastian, then hope for the best?”
“Waiting might not be an option, Cordelia.” Wesley stopped for a minute, as if afraid to continue. Eventually, he did. “The symptoms you’re experiencing are the late stages of deterioration. You might not have much time.”
She fell silent, staring down at her hands and biting her lip.
Wesley finally broke the silence. “If you’re serious about letting Angel claim you, this is a conversation we should be having with him. If he claimed you, we could deal with it and find a way to release you from it later.”
“What?” she said, her head jerking up. “No! Angel can’t know about this, Wesley. No way. I can’t ask him to do this. I’ve already used him horribly and I just can’t—” her voice broke and her eyes filled with tears. “We’ve been together because I can’t control myself, not because we love each other. Well, I do, love him, I mean, but I don’t know what he—” she stopped.
“Cordy, Angel feels—”
“No!” she cut him off. “I can’t ask him, Wesley. I just can’t, okay?” Her tears overflowed and tracked down her cheeks. “We’ll just have to find another way. Look harder.”
Wesley frowned, but nodded. “Very well, Cordelia. But think about it anyway. If I don’t find anything, you might not have any other options.”
“Find one, Wesley. Please.” Her whispered plea made him reach for her hand and squeeze it reassuringly.
“I’ll try, Cordelia.”
She nodded tersely, suddenly unable to speak, then turned and left the office, fleeing to the safe haven of her apartment.
***
He was there, with her. In her dream, he hovered near her, his fingers trailing across her jaw, his aristocratically handsome face contorted in an evil smile. She moaned and turned her face away from him, but his hand followed, never breaking contact with her skin. She tried to move her hands up to push him away, but the felt heavy, as if made of lead. Slowly, his hand traveled down the column of her neck, briefly skimming over the marks he’d left on her skin, then moving down to the neckline of her tank top.
She whimpered as his forefinger dipped beneath the lacy edge. His finger skimmed across the neckline, moving over to her strap and pulling it down her shoulder, then moving to the other side and doing the same. Then, bringing his hand back to the center, he tugged on her neckline, drawing the garment down until her breasts were bare to his gaze.
To her horror, he knelt down beside the bed and leaned over her, his cool breath fanning her skin. His mouth nuzzled her jaw, kissed, then licked his mark. She shuddered and again tried to move away, but she was frozen. He kissed down her collar bone, then the valley between her breasts, his fingers reaching out to tweak the nipples into hardness.
Abruptly, he moved away from her, and she sighed in relief. It was short-lived, however, as she realized he was removing his shirt. Thankfully, he left his pants on, but her fear came back in full force as he climbed on the bed and separated her legs, positioning himself between them.
“No!” she whimpered, but her plea went unheard. He knelt over her, his hands braced on either side of her torso, and his mouth trailed a cool path down her body, stopping to draw the tips of her breasts into his mouth.
She moaned, louder this time, and realized that she could fight against the spell she was under. Her fear gave her strength, and she arched up, trying to push him off her. Her miniscule movement made him smile, though, her fear making his attack that much sweeter.
“No, little one,” his silky voice whispered against her breast, sending tendrils of fear skittering across her skin. “Do not fight me. You desire me. You need me. We both know it.”
He brought one hand to toy with the drawstring at the edge of her pajama pants.
“No,” she whimpered again, tears escaping from the corners of her eyes. “Don’t, please,” she begged.
He just smiled at her, triumphant and certain that he would not be caught. “You do want me. Angelus cannot satisfy you. You belong to me!” He hissed the final phrase, his face contorting into that of his demon, and the fear she felt flow through her gave her the strength she needed.
Screaming, Cordelia bolted upright in bed, her eyes opening, her hands coming up to cover her face.
“It’s just a dream, just a dream, just a dream,” she whispered frantically to herself. For a moment, the silence in her room calmed her, until she realized that her forearms rested on her breasts. Her bare breasts.
“No!” she moaned, pulling her hands away from her face and looking up. Staring into the deep amber eyes of her captor, she felt fear like she never had before.
“You are not dreaming, little one,” Sebastian said, suddenly grabbing her arms and jerking her toward him. “Angelus will pay for what he did to my Brianna,” he hissed. “He will pay with you.”
She struggled against him, but his grip had the strength of steel. Just before his lips claimed hers, she used the last of her strength to scream, “Angel!”
Part 11