{"id":7040,"date":"2015-08-01T22:41:21","date_gmt":"2015-08-01T21:41:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/?p=7040"},"modified":"2024-11-11T19:24:33","modified_gmt":"2024-11-11T19:24:33","slug":"to-be-alive-or-to-live-6-13","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/2015\/08\/01\/to-be-alive-or-to-live-6-13\/","title":{"rendered":"To be Alive or to Live. 6-13"},"content":{"rendered":"

Chapter six<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sleepy,\u201d Cordelia yawned as she and Angel entered the hotel lobby.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s been a long day and night,\u201d Angel agreed, gently placing Cordelia on the sofa.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d she yawned again. \u201cIt\u2019s good to be home. Sorry, the party turned into another vision wham bam. I wanted you to have fun.\u201d Cordelia scrunched up her face. \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t have gone to the docks,\u201d she chastised Angel.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel shrugged. \u201cI wasn\u2019t in any danger, none,\u201d he explained, grimacing at the memory. He had felt useless.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cStill,\u201d Cordelia swayed motioning Angel to the couch. \u201cYou shouldn\u2019t have gone. What if you had been killed or hurt,\u201d she scolded.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt didn\u2019t happen, so stop worrying.\u201d Angel remained standing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia took a deep sigh and flopped deeper into the couch. \u201cWorry? I\u2019ll always worry about you,\u201d she commented to the room at large. \u201cI love you\u2026I want my Angel back,\u201d she pouted, scrunching up her face. \u201cI don\u2019t feel so well, I think I\u2019m drunk, what was I talking about. I think I need to go to bed.\u201d She hiccuped and yawned.<\/span><\/p>\n

A strange stillness gripped Angel. Cordelia had said it again. She loved him. The first time she had said that to him it had been in a flippant teasing tone of friendship. Angel had accepted the words, felt joy at hearing them and understood their meaning. Then again, just several hours ago at the beach, Cordelia had repeated the same words. They hadn\u2019t been flippant just honest.<\/span><\/p>\n

And like before, Angel had accepted the words for what they were- a declaration of her friendship one that he had returned. They were friends, best friends. But this time\u2026It felt different, though he knew she was drunk, the words were said with more\u2026something, he couldn\u2019t understand it was different, unknown, scary even. Angel shook his head. He had to go to sleep, then wake up and go to Buffy, too what he understood.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel looked again at the sleepy, drunk young woman sprawled out on the couch. He couldn\u2019t leave her like that. Angel gently picked up the young woman.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhay\u2026Where are you taking me,\u201d her words fumbled over each other.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTo bed.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTo bed\u2026wow\u2026finally\u2026\u201d she snuggled closer into Angel\u2019s chest.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel\u2019s heart stopped as a sudden burst of desire tingled in his loins, causing confusion in his brain. He had to have misunderstood, he thought, trying to right his swirling equilibrium. Cordelia just wanted to go to sleep, that\u2019s all. Angel\u2019s mind shied away in panic at any other possibility.<\/span><\/p>\n

Again, glimpses and flashes of an answer flitted through his mind. Angel forced his mind to concentrate on what he knew to be true. Cordelia was his best friend. Buffy was the love of his life. He struggled against the panic that pushed against his surety.<\/span><\/p>\n

No, Angel thought, he was human; he now could have everything he wished for. Angel shoved the panic and unease down. Tomorrow, he would leave. Tonight, Angel would dream about his second chance with Buffy. But first Angel had to make sure that Cordelia was comfortable.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter seven<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Angel carried Cordelia up to his room. He had planned on tucking her into his bed and staying the night in the chair beside it. It was a position that he was well accustomed to.<\/span><\/p>\n

After a late night of demon hunting or a bad vision experience, Cordelia would stay wrapped in his bed and Angel would stay near by watching, experiencing an emotion that could only describe as joy that they, that Cordelia had made it through alive.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAngel,\u201d Cordelia whispered as Angel settled her on the large bed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGo to sleep, Cordy,\u201d he answered in the same low tone.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOkay,\u201d Her large eyes blinked. Cordelia yawned, then hiccuped. A moment of quiet descended over the room. \u201cI don\u2019t feel well,\u201d Cordelia whined.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHere drink this,\u201d Angel said handing her a glass of water and a painkiller.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia snuggled deeper into the mattress, allowing Angel to place the liquid up to her lips. She grimaced slightly as the pill traveled down her throat. \u201cIck,\u201d she complained, her red eyes scrunching up.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYou’ll feel better tomorrow,\u201d Angel promised.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo I won\u2019t,\u201d she struggled. \u201cMy Angel will leave me\u2026and\u2026. I\u2019m sleepy.\u201d Cordelia finished, burrowing her body further into the covers.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel was getting uncomfortable and he was tired.<\/span><\/p>\n

He tried to keep his eyes open to watch Cordelia to make sure she fell asleep, but his eyes were involuntarily closing. Angel squirmed in the chair.<\/span><\/p>\n

The chair never bothered him before, but then again, Angel was never human before, he grimaced. Angel\u2019s weary eyes strayed to the open area of the bed next to Cordelia\u2019s huddled form.<\/span><\/p>\n

It looked so welcoming, so comfortable. Angel did what he never would have done two days prior; he crawled into the space and fell asleep.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter eight<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Angel spent a restless night. Disturbing dreams were constantly interrupting his sleep. Flashes of Groo swirling through the portal would parade through his unconscious, followed by the image of Cordelia in her princess finery hugging at the handsome warrior, saying that she loved the warrior.<\/span><\/p>\n

Then the couple would move further and further away from Angel. Cordelia would glance over her delicate shoulder and laugh. \u201cOf course, I don\u2019t love you,\u201d she would say with disdain. \u201cI love him, not you dumb ass.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia\u2019s mocking voice triggered an anxiety within Angel. He would toss and turn, trying to capture the picture of Cordelia on the beach, try to feel her love as she gazed at Angel then the sun.<\/span><\/p>\n

Just when he would calm into a restful sleep, Angel would see Cordelia falling in agony as the pain of a vision overcame her. Cordelia\u2019s body would be wracked in pain, suffering. Angel would be far way, but Groo would be there trying to urge his comfort on her, but it wouldn\u2019t work. Cordelia would just writhe on the floor, clutching at her head, screaming for Angel.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel would try with all of his might to travel the great distance to reach her. Finally, he would reach her. Angel would drop to Cordelia\u2019s side, laying his hands on her shoulders and her cries of agony would cease. He would feel happy, joy even. But, then Cordelia would look up at him with her large beautiful eyes, “You’re not my Angel,\u201d she would say sadly, then she would laugh. \u201cDumb ass,\u201d she would turn and reach for the Pylean warrior. Angel tossed and turned through out the night.<\/span><\/p>\n

Gratefully, Angel woke from the images. The anxiety of the dreams faded as he blinked and recalled that he was human and that today was the day that he would go to Buffy. He was happy. Or Angel was until he felt the body lying next to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia was disheveled and\u2026. Beautiful, Angel acknowledged as he watched her still form next to him. She hadn\u2019t moved during the night, the alcohol had taken over her body. Cordelia was dead to the world. Angel leaned in and gently brushed away a strain of dark hair that had positioned itself between her lips.<\/span><\/p>\n

The thoughts of Buffy disappeared just as quickly as they came as he gazed at Cordelia. Angel couldn\u2019t leave her. Cordelia was such an important part of his life; she had been Angel\u2019s life for what seemed forever. Angel\u2019s fingers twirled in her hair. His seer had been his redemption. Not his seer, not anymore, Angel thought suddenly as his stomach dropped.<\/span><\/p>\n

Today, an important vital chapter of his life would be closed. Angel thought more in terms of Groo\u2019s appearance rather than his own transformation as the final end. It didn\u2019t matter anymore, even if Angel wanted to stay or if Cordelia for some hopeful reason decided to go with Angel it didn\u2019t matter. She couldn\u2019t.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia\u2019s place for some unfair reason was still in LA, still as a link to the Powers, but now with a new warrior. Angel grimaced; he didn\u2019t trust the \u2018he-man\u2019 of Pylea to take proper of care of Cordelia. But it was no longer Angel\u2019s place. Angel struggled with the anger that swirled around his head.<\/span><\/p>\n

Groo, Angel\u2019s stomach dropped further at the thought of the other warrior. Angel remembered his dream. But it hadn\u2019t only been a dream. Cordelia had said she loved the warrior, Angel had heard it, and had been confused and hurt by it in Pylea. It had been real.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel had no place in LA, not anymore. With one last look, Angel got up from the bed. It was time for him to go to Sunnydale. A multiple of emotions jumbled in Angel\u2019s mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wrongness settled over his being as he moved further from the sleeping form of Cordelia. She was no longer familiar to him. She scared him; confused him. Angel could sense that all could be made right, if he would just concentrate on the swirling emotions and force the unknown answer into the light. But it was the unexplored area that frightened and made him uneasy.<\/span><\/p>\n

Buffy was a surety or rather his love for her was. Angel didn\u2019t know if Buffy would still want him, but that was a risk he had to take, one that he was prepared for. But that erratic feeling Angel got when he gazed on or thought about Cordelia was something he didn\u2019t want to face, something he didn\u2019t think he could face.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, Angel left to go towards the familiar, the known.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel stopped; he couldn\u2019t leave without saying goodbye. He leaned in to wake Cordelia, but his hand stalled in its descent. The thought of touching her, seeing Cordelia\u2019s wide eyes staring at him, scared him. Cordelia would be fine, he swore as he pulled his hand back.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley and Gunn would be with her.<\/span><\/p>\n

And Angel would check up on her from Sunnydale. Nothing would happen to his, to Groo\u2019s seer, he corrected. Nothing. With his jumbled emotions firmly compartmentalized and put back in their familiar place, Angel left, promising to call once he got to Sunnydale; he would say good bye then.<\/span><\/p>\n

When it was safe.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter nine<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

A dull repetitive thud woke Cordelia up. She winced as the sound got louder when she squinted her eyes open. A sharp pain began to accompany the pounding of the steady rhythms. She slammed her eyes closed waiting for the images of the vision.<\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing. That\u2019s when she slowly realized that the fire that was building up in her brain as the hammers struck harshly was not Power\u2019s related, but one of her own doing.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia groaned trying to remember how she had gotten the killer of all killer hangovers. Flashes of Caritas and Lorne shoving the evil bottle towards her lept to her mind. Cordelia cursed the green demon, as she saw him waving his bright yellow clad arms for her to drink. And she grimaced as she pictured herself gulping at the bottle.<\/span><\/p>\n

Groo, Cordelia\u2019s eyes suddenly shot open, he had been there. Owwwww, she whined as her memory came back in flashing techno color. God, she wished that the pain was left over from a vision and that the last 12 hours, hell the last 24 hours hadn\u2019t happened. Cordelia gasped and jerked up at her traitorous thought.<\/span><\/p>\n

Twenty- four hours ago, Angel became alive, really alive, she couldn\u2019t wish that hadn\u2019t happened.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia flopped down further in the bed as she realized that she really did wish that the last 24 hours disappeared, that way she wouldn\u2019t have to face the morning and watch Angel leave her. Cordelia wouldn\u2019t have to smile and wave as Angel strode out of the hotel back to Sunnydale.<\/span><\/p>\n

Hell, Cordelia was selfish she berated herself. Another thought jolted her up from the bed, Angel. Had he left yet? Angel wouldn\u2019t leave her without saying goodbye she panicked. Cordelia fumbled to get up, wincing at the pain in her head.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia raced, well actually she stumbled from the bedroom after stopping in the bathroom to splash cold water on her face and drinking a gallon\u2019s worth of the same liquid. Her mouth still felt like herds of sheep were milling around in the small area, but at least she could gasp out some words.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia glanced around the bedroom, Angel\u2019s bedroom, but she didn\u2019t see any sign of Angel. Maybe, Cordelia hoped, Angel had slept in the guestroom or downstairs.<\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s why he wasn\u2019t there. Angel was still in the hotel; she just had to find him. Cordelia wished the stampede of Buffalo would stop prancing on her brain. She squinched up her head in an attempt to dim the pounding around her and left the room.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley, not Angel was the first person she saw. Her ex-watcher friend was looking tired and uncomfortable.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley glanced up at the young woman descending the stairs. Wesley didn\u2019t want to be there, but he had no choice. Angel had called him, telling Wesley that he was leaving for Sunnydale.<\/span><\/p>\n

The former vampire wanted to say goodbye and to tell Wesley that he hadn\u2019t wanted to wake Cordelia up to say the same, would Wesley say it for him? Angel had pleaded.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley had stalled the string of expletives that bulged in his throat at the request. He couldn\u2019t believe that Angel would be so thoughtless. But Angel had been and Wesley had rushed to get to the hotel before Cordelia woke.<\/span><\/p>\n

Now Wesley was stuck telling Cordelia that her best friend had left LA with telling her goodbye.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWesley, where\u2019s Angel,\u201d Cordelia smacked her mouth trying to get the words to form through the cotton in her mouth.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm\u2026..\u201d Wesley moved closer to the young woman wishing that Angel had had the forbearance to do the correct thing. \u201cHe left. About two hours ago. He\u2026..\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLeft?\u201d Cordelia interrupted, instinctively not wanting to hear the rest. \u201cTo enjoy another sunrise, experience a breakfast buffet, you mean,\u201d she glanced expectantly at Wesley. Cordelia refused to contemplative any other alternative.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m sorry Cordelia, but no. He should be in Sunnydale soon.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia said nothing as she slumped to the ground. The ache in her head dimmed as the ache in her heart grew. Angel left her, really left her without saying goodbye even. Her blurry eyes widened, then closed forcing the tears back.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordy,\u201d Wesley said softly. \u201cHe said that he would call when he got there. He just didn\u2019t want to wake you.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe left?\u201d Cordelia said weakly, still hoping that what she was hearing was wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley nodded reaching for the young woman. Cordelia stared at Wesley\u2019s approaching hands; they were reaching for her. And with every inch they got closer the knowledge that Angel was really gone pounded a nail into her chest, constructing up a barrier.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia brushed his hands aside.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHe left,\u201d she said her voice getting stronger. She looked around at the empty lobby. \u201cAnd\u2026.\u201d Cordelia gathered her strength, her hangover, and her heartache both being overwhelmed by the concrete solidifying around her heart.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHow did Dennis do with Groo?\u201d she asked, her mind blocking out all emotion.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordy,\u201d Wesley tried. \u201cI know you must be upset but Angel said\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI asked you a question. How is Groo?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFine,\u201d Wesley sighed. He could kill Angel; Cordelia\u2019s voice was hard and firm. Her wide eyes had briefly shown signs of pain, but now they were lifeless, the striking brown of her eyes became dull and cold.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia nodded. \u201cSo, where\u2019s the new office to be? We need to think about that. I mean do we really need this stupid old place.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cUm, Cordelia\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOr are you leaving me too,\u201d she glared, unable to help herself.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOf course not,\u201d Wesley cried. \u201cBut, Angel signed over the lease to me. The hotel is ours or at least for the next 6 months.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t like\u2026..\u201d Cordelia stumbled, gasping as a blazing knife penetrated her brain. She fell, tumbling down the rest of the flight of stairs, crying. Wesley ran towards her, but he didn\u2019t reach her until she was lying crumpled on the floor.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGet Groo here,\u201d she whimpered, trying to straighten herself up against the debilitating pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter ten<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Surprisingly the traffic out of LA was sparse. Angel was able to get on the highway with ease. But, Angel\u2019s hands gripped the steering wheel tighter the further and further away he drove. Angel tried to focus his mind on the upcoming fulfillment of all his hopes and dreams.<\/span><\/p>\n

But instead of a blue-eyed blonde, imagines of a hazel-eyed brunette swarmed his mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia, his heart lurched. She would not be happy with his just up and leaving. But Angel couldn\u2019t have stayed. To stay would have meant to explore the unknown part of his mind and that frightened him. To go was to head to safety\u2026and love\u2026and the fulfillment of his dreams, Angel added in quick validation.<\/span><\/p>\n

To Sunnydale, to Buffy. Cordelia would understand, she always understood. Angel\u2019s heart lurched again at that justification of his quick get a way. With the benefit of years of practice, Angel cleared his mind and focused again on his goal.<\/span><\/p>\n

He sighed, in relief as the milepost passed and he traveled further and further from LA.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordelia?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWesley,\u201d Cordelia countered struggling away from his hands as they tried to lift her to her feet. She bit her lips,<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGet Groo and Gunn. An Atrox demon \u2026\u2026.the beach\u2026\u2026..a children\u2019s party\u2026\u2026\u2026.go.\u201d Cordelia demanded, cradling her head in between her palms. \u201cGo, Please,\u201d her voice splintered under the weight of the pain the vision was causing her.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordelia?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGo! The sooner it\u2019s defeated the sooner the hot pokers leave,\u201d she squinted and gasped at the same time.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOf course,\u201d Wesley nodded. He left quickly, first rushing to the weapons\u2019 cabinet to gather a bag full of sharp instruments.<\/span><\/p>\n

With a sigh of relief, Cordelia crumbled once again to the floor as she heard the front door slam shut.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

Wesley clutched at his cell phone, shouting instructions as his motorcycle\u2019s front tire jumped in the air and the back tire screamed against the pavement.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

Gunn slammed down the phone. \u201cCome on, hero, it\u2019s time to show your stuff again,\u201d he called to Groo.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe princess?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIs suffering a great never-ending headache right now. Come on,\u201d Gunn ordered<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI must go to her,\u201d Groo argued. \u201cYou can not keep us apart.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cA brother can hope,\u201d Gunn grumbled lowly, before he commented out loud. \u201cThe princess is having a sight thing. To stop the pain, we have to stop the demon. Let\u2019s go, Mr. Universe of the swirling hole.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Gunn couldn\u2019t believe that he was wishing for the vamp back. He knew as well as Wesley and Cordelia that Angel\u2019s becoming human was the vamp\u2019s dream come true, but damn what Gunn wouldn\u2019t give for Angel\u2019s dream to have been postponed long enough so that the Pylean muscled bound wonder warrior wouldn\u2019t be needed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will follow for the princess.\u201d Groo grudgingly acknowledged.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDamn straight,\u201d Gunn grumbled again, leading the way.<\/span><\/p>\n

***<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordelia, Cordy?\u201d Fred called into the darkness of the Hyperion. Wesley\u2019s second frantic call was to the young Pylean escapee.<\/span><\/p>\n

He had asked Fred to go and stay with Cordelia. Wesley had been concerned at how weak Cordelia had seemed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordelia,\u201d Fred called again, switching on the lights.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo,\u201d a weak voice came up from the floor by the sofa. \u201cHurts,\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Fred quickly shut off the lights and scrambled towards the sound of the strained voice.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIt will be okay,\u201d Fred whispered as she clutched at Cordelia\u2019s trembling hands.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo, it won\u2019t,\u201d Cordelia\u2019s small voice gasped back.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter eleven<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Angel slowed as he passed the Welcome to Sunnydale sign. Just a little bit further, he thought. Against all of his will, the image of Cordelia\u2019s sleeping beautiful face pressed into his mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

Followed swiftly by that same lovely face scrunched up in unbearable pain. How could he had have left her? His mind cried. The car crept to a halt as Angel\u2019s struggled against the internal battle that waged inside.<\/span><\/p>\n

A sick feeling swept over him as he turned the key and pressed the gas. His decision was made. Angel headed into Sunnydale.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel parked his car behind some trees a few blocks down from Buffy\u2019s house. Now that he was there, he was hesitant to go any further. What if Buffy didn\u2019t want him? What then would he do? Go back to LA?<\/span><\/p>\n

The sickness that had earlier skimmed through his stomach grew swallowing his being as he realized that if Buffy rejected him, he would have nowhere to go. LA was no longer an option. He had left Cordelia; he couldn\u2019t expect her to welcome him back, again, could he?<\/span><\/p>\n

In that one brief moment, Angel\u2019s heart broke. The unknown had become known. He had lost Cordelia once more, and like before it was because of his own actions. The moment was gone as swiftly as the epiphany that caused it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Buffy was who he loved, Angel reminded himself.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter twelve<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Groo came barging into the hotel. \u201cPrincess,\u201d he shouted.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia grimaced, pulling her hands away from her head. She gulped as the warrior grabbed her by the shoulders and pressed her to him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cThe demon is gone. Please let me\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Fred watched as Cordelia\u2019s face got even paler than it was before. \u201cUm, Groo, champion, the princess is feeling a little not well right now. She needs air\u2026so,\u201d Fred motioned for Groo to loosen his tight grip.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia gave a half smile in gratitude as Groo slowly released her. His expression concerned and puzzled. \u201cBut, I can relieve the burden.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, thank you, but not now,\u201d Cordelia whispered. She winced as the pounding in her head remained. The danger was over, the mind flash of evil was gone, so why was she still hurting? Cordelia struggled to her feet.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWes\u2026. Wesley take me\u2026\u2026\u2026\u201d Cordelia looked around. She had no home anymore. Groo was staying at her apartment and Angel was gone from the hotel. Cordelia couldn\u2019t\u2019 think, she just wanted to be alone. \u201cWesley, please\u2026\u201d She begged, praying that her friend would understand.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, well, Gunn take Groo back to the apartment. Fred is it possible that you stay here with Cordelia tonight?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia shot him a look. Wesley stared down the young woman. \u201cFred?\u201d He asked, ignoring Cordelia\u2019s look.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, of course.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFine,\u201d Wesley said his eyes never leaving Cordelia. Wesley would not leave Cordelia alone. But he would make Groo disappear for the night.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia\u2019s shoulder\u2019s slumped in acknowledgement at Wesley\u2019s conditions.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes, well good then,\u201d Wesley said, ushering both Gunn and Groo to the door.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will not leave the princess.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Conan, you will,\u201d Gunn pushed at the warrior.<\/span><\/p>\n

Groo bristled at Gunn\u2019s actions.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSir, Champion, please. Cordy needs rest. Maybe tomorrow,\u201d Fred blinked and smiled timidly.<\/span><\/p>\n

Groo studied the woman that had passed unnoticed earlier. She was the only one of strange other worlders’ that had treated him with even a modicum of respect.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cVery well,\u201d he nodded to Fred. \u201cPrincess, I\u2019m yours to command.\u201d He gushed to Cordelia.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cGreat,\u201d Cordelia grimaced. \u201cI\u2019m going to lay down now,\u201d she winced towards the steps.<\/span><\/p>\n

Fred quickly followed her up. Cordelia stalled in front of Angel\u2019s suite. She wished that she was far, far away from that room, the hotel. But \u2026Cordelia shook her head. “The guest room should be made up,\u201d Cordelia pointed to the room across the hall. There should be stuff in it.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be fine, remember I used to live in a cave,\u201d Fred bobbed.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRight, Wilma and Betty combined.\u201d Cordelia smiled softly. \u201cGood night.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCordelia, do you need anything. Aspirin, water, anything?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll be fine,\u201d Cordelia shrugged. Cordelia wished the helpful young woman to Hades. Cordelia just wanted to be alone. As soon as she thought it she felt guilty. \u201cThanks, Fred, Really I\u2019ll be okay,\u201d Cordelia tried to smile.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you need anything\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI will call, goodnight,\u201d Cordelia said going into Angel\u2019s suite. She braved a smile as she closed the door on the worried Fred.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cordelia looked around at the bedroom. She shouldn\u2019t be there. She should be home\u2026. home; nothing felt like home anymore. How could she think when her head was still pounding? Cordelia crawled into Angel\u2019s bed, pulling the cover tight around her body.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sleep, she prayed, sleep, make this day go away, she begged to whoever would listen. The last thought Cordelia had before her sobbing and the thumping of her brain drove her into an exhaustive sleep was that Angel was finally happy.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Chapter thirteen<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Angel stared at Buffy\u2019s house for the longest time. Images of the past paraded through his mind.<\/span><\/p>\n

He remembered the first time Whistler allowed him to get a glimpse of the beautiful young girl. Angel saw Buffy as she fought off vampires in the alley. He remembered her strength and courage. He saw Buffy\u2019s face as she gave herself to him in love. Angel remembered the heartbreak in her eyes as she watched him leave her.<\/span><\/p>\n

He felt Buffy\u2019s touch as he relived the forgotten day in LA. Angel felt Buffy\u2019s sadness and need as he held her beside the grave of her mother. His heart ached as he experienced the loss her death had caused him, he felt the rejoice of hearing that Buffy was still alive. Angel did love Buffy. He did want her. He got out of the car. Cordelia knew this; she would understand why he left.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel knocked on the door, gearing himself for the speech that he would give.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho? Dead boy? What do you want?\u2019 Xander broke through Angel\u2019s preparations.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel stepped back as Xander\u2019s contemptuous tone washed over him.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWho is it?\u2019 Buffy\u2019s voice called from the living room.<\/span><\/p>\n

Xander stared at Angel. Angel could see the young man\u2019s temptation just to slam the door. Reluctantly Xander moved from the door. \u201cSomeone that needs an invite,\u201d he finally said.<\/span><\/p>\n

Buffy charged into the front room stake in hand. \u201cAngel?\u201d she stalled, the wooden stick still in the air.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel shot a look at Xander. All thoughts of breaking the news slowly to Buffy flew out of his head. He stepped over the threshold. \u201cInvites are pass\u00e9.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Xander\u2019s eyes widen in irritation. \u201cHow? What? When did you give an open invite to dead boy? I thought that particular problem was cleared when we did the universal unvite,\u201d he shot accusingly at Buffy.<\/span><\/p>\n

Buffy stared, her stake falling to the ground. \u201cOh my god, how? What? \u201c She repeated Xander\u2019s words, but not their meaning. \u201cAngel?\u201d she moved closer.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel nodded.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh my god,\u201d she said again. \u201cYou\u2019re human.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d Angel said, looking at the living room doorway as it filled with a group of people, some he recognized and some he didn\u2019t.<\/span><\/p>\n

Willow, Tara, Giles, Dawn, Anya and Spike had moved to the other room as Xander and Buffy\u2019s voices got louder. Giles and Willow dropped their weapons as they heard Buffy\u2019s final exclamation and saw Angel\u2019s tentative nod.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh Goddess,\u201d Willow squeaked.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Fuck,\u201d Spike grumbled.<\/span><\/p>\n

Angel glared at the blonde vampire as Willow and Buffy pulled Angel into the living room.<\/span><\/p>\n

Chapter 14<\/a><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Chapter six \u201cI\u2019m sleepy,\u201d Cordelia yawned as she and Angel entered the hotel lobby. \u201cIt\u2019s been a long day and night,\u201d Angel agreed,…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7040","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-completed-fics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7040","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7040"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7040\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13516,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7040\/revisions\/13516"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7040"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7040"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7040"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}