Chapter 79<\/b><\/p>\n
Angel sat as close to Cordelia as he could without exchanging her for Darcy on his lap. And he was very tempted to do just that if only to get Cordelia to stop paying all of her attention to Miss Twittle.<\/p>\n
He took a deep breath as he realized the foolishness of such an action and switched his concentration to their phone conversation.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh dear,\u201d Miss Twittle chuckled. \u201cCordy, where is Darcy now?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh Angel\u2019s lap. He seems really happy. He\u2019s purring.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel felt a bit less annoyed — at least she did realize that he was next to her. His fingers did double time on the area around Darcy\u2019s big ears. The kitten melted against his hand and purred even louder. Angel smugly looked up at Cordelia, who rolled her eyes at him.<\/p>\n
\u201cHoney, tell me the truth.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel narrowed his eyes at the sudden tension in Cordelia\u2019s shoulders. Darcy squirmed at the abrupt stillness of his hand. What the hell was Miss Twittle talking about?<\/p>\n
Cordelia tried to clear her throat but still ended up stuttering. \u201cI am.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel wanted to slam the phone down to silence Miss Twittle\u2019s demand for the truth and conversely,to grab it closer to clearly hear what she had to say. He decided to stay still and just listen. Cordelia was becoming comfortable in the mansion.<\/p>\n
It was more important that he discern if Miss Twittle\u2019s words would be a threat to Cordy\u2019s growing acceptance of him and their situation rather than her obvious agitation over Miss Twittle\u2019s question.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, dear. Now tell me the rest — did you even go to school today?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, but then \u2026 well, Darcy was driving Angel really nuts. He wouldn\u2019t stop crying.\u201d Cordelia\u2019s shoulders relaxed. Angel took a deep breath; relieved that Miss Twittle was so easily handled.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re coddling him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel?\u201d Cordelia narrowed her eyes at Angel. \u2018Did you just Pfft\u2019, she mouthed.<\/p>\n
He returned her question with an innocent gaze.<\/p>\n
A soft chuckle sounded through the phone. \u201cNo dear, Darcy.\u201d<\/p>\n
He maintained his expression and continued to pet Darcy, as Cordelia gave silent \u2018Pfft\u2019 and turned back to the phone.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut — \u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cCordy, Darcy is a cat.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel nodded. That\u2019s what he had been telling her.<\/p>\n
\u201cI — \u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cHoney, you\u2019re spoiling Darcy. You don\u2019t need to be with him every minute. It\u2019s no wonder that he cried when you went to school.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut — \u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Cordelia. I\u2019d wager a bet, if I did such an illegal thing, that neither you nor Angel have actually allowed Darcy to explore on his own.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut, Miss Twittle, he\u2019s so small he could get lost.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel cringed, remembering the couple of times that Darcy had escaped from him. That wasn\u2019t going to happen again. Angel would rather carry Darcy around even if he looked like one of those flighty Victorian ladies and their equally annoying lap poodles.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe won\u2019t, not as long as you make sure he can\u2019t get outside. Let him walk around the house on his own four feet. He needs to learn independence.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut, he likes to be held and petted,\u201d Cordy said, shooting Angel a questioning look.<\/p>\n
Angel nodded, hoping to encourage her just in case Miss Twittle suggested exiling the kitten from their bedroom.<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course he does and you should. But kittens can be left to their own devices for a period of time. They\u2019re quite the self-sufficient little creatures.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut — \u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, buts, Cordelia. You have to go to school and to work —\u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cWork?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, work.\u201d Miss Twittle chuckled. \u201cThe store is scheduled to open in a couple of days. I expect you to be there.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course.\u201d Cordelia nodded.<\/p>\n
Angel\u2019s chest constricted. He had forgotten about Cordelia\u2019s misguided notion that she needed to work. Convincing her otherwise wouldn\u2019t be easy. It would probably best if he just made sure that the dress store never re-opened.<\/p>\n
\u201cNow, Cordy, I would suggest that perhaps you and Angel go out tonight and enjoy yourselves — leaving Darcy to his own devices. Of course, I do expect you both to keep alert for any dangers.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel felt his chest tighten again. He didn\u2019t want to leave the mansion, or more particularly he didn\u2019t want to leave his position on the sofa next to Cordelia.<\/p>\n
Chapter 80<\/b><\/p>\n
\u201cSo,\u201d Cordelia sighed, leaning back on the couch. \u201cWe\u2019re supposed to go out.\u201d She stretched her hand out to join in petting Darcy.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe can do that.\u201d The more Angel thought about the idea the more he could accept it. He wouldn\u2019t necessarily be alone with Cordy but he was sure he would have an easier time distracting her from strangers rather than needy presence of Darcy. \u201cWhere?\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordy\u2019s brow wrinkled. \u201cNot Starbucks. Harmony works there. Not the Bronze. Who knows who\u2019ll be there? Maybe the mall?\u201d She suggested, straightening up.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d she sighed, her shoulders slumping. \u201cIt\u2019s no fun without money and anyway Aura and Josh work at Burger Heaven in the Food Court. Though,\u201d she perked up. \u201cI would love to see them in those stupid hats. But, then we can\u2019t let any body see us. Jeez. Sunnydale is sinking into an even smaller pit by the minute.\u201d She frowned.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy can\u2019t anybody see us?\u201d Angel asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cDuh, someone sees us \u2018out\u2019,\u201d she quoted in the air, \u201c and it will be around school by first bell. By second I\u2019d be cornered by an angry slayer, and by third, while my pummeled body is being wiped up, you\u2019d have her on your doorstep. And to appease her irrational anger you\u2019d tell her the truth. And that\u2019s so not happening.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEven IF that highly imaginative scenario was to occur. Buffy wouldn\u2019t hurt you.\u201d He stopped at her loud snort. \u201cI wouldn\u2019t let her. Anyway, it\u2019s none of her business.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia snorted again, even louder.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not.\u201d Angel said firmly.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, you know nothing about women or Buffy if you believe that. You may no longer be \u2018dating\u2019 — \u201c.<\/p>\n
\u201cStop that.\u201d Angel grabbed her upraised fingers.<\/p>\n
She tugged at her hands and dropped them to her lap. \u201cFine. But whatever your delusions, Buffy hasn\u2019t given up her leash,\u201d she continued. \u201cAnd you can\u2019t tell me that you wouldn\u2019t give up my secret if it was a choice between it and her being angry with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel leaned in closer, ignoring Darcy\u2019s irritated squeal as the kitten was driven off his lap. \u201cI told you.\u201d His jaw clenched so that the words came out sharp and low. \u201cThere is NO leash.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhatever.\u201d Cordelia\u2019s gaze flickered to the floor.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot whatever.\u201d Angel leaned in even closer to block any possible movement on her part. \u201cBuffy has nothing to do with this. THIS is about us — \u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cUs?\u201d Cordelia squeaked as her hands fluttered on his chest.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, us.\u201d Angel pushed her hands away and leaned back against the couch. \u201cAnd YOUR apparent lack of trust.\u201d He crossed his arms. Turning to look at her, he said, \u201cI thought you trusted me. I don\u2019t know what else I can do for you to prove it.\u201d His seemingly half haphazard wave hovered in the direction of the new TV. He turned his gaze to the far wall.<\/p>\n
\u201cI — I do trust you,\u201d she stuttered.<\/p>\n
Angel shook his head.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, I do — it\u2019s just that — I know how you feel about Buffy.\u201d<\/p>\n
He jerked away from her approaching hand. \u201cYou don\u2019t know anything about me or the way I feel if you think I would betray you.\u201d Angel got up and turned away from her.<\/p>\n
Cordelia fidgeted and gathered her breath in the heavy silence. Finally, she jumped up from the couch and moved in front him. \u201cI\u2019m so sorry, Angel.\u201d She reached out again. \u201cI do trust you. I swear. You\u2019ve been wonderful — are wonderful.\u201d She squeezed his arm.<\/p>\n
\u201cI thought you had begun to think of me as a friend,\u201d He said softly as he looked at the floor.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh God, I do.\u201d Cordelia reassured him as she wrapped her arms around him.<\/p>\n
\u201dYou swear,\u201d he whispered into the crook of her neck.<\/p>\n
\u201cDefinitely.\u201d She nodded into his shoulder.<\/p>\n
\u201cGood.\u201d Angel said as he pulled her body flush against his. \u201cBecause that\u2019s what I want,\u201d he whispered as he hid his satisfied smile in the depths of her hair.<\/p>\n
Chapter 81<\/b><\/p>\n
Cordelia\u2019s mind rang with caution, but her body rejoiced at the solid feel of him against her. She did trust him, she vowed, pushing aside the doubts that Buffy\u2019s name brought up.<\/p>\n
She didn\u2019t necessarily hate Buffy, but her life had seemed a lot easier before the slayer showed up. Sure, Buffy saved her life plenty of times, but her life had never been in danger before then.<\/p>\n
Cordelia refused to rub her head at what was beginning to be a \u2018chicken or the egg argument\u2019. What was important was that Angel had offered her friendship when she had no one and she couldn\u2019t let her mixed-up feeling about Buffy screw that up.<\/p>\n
Hell, Buffy had nothing to do with her being poor.<\/p>\n
Settling the important issue in her mind, she trailed her hands over Angel\u2019s shoulder\u2019s to rest them on his chest. \u201cYou\u2019ve been great. A real friend.\u201d She repeated, blinking back tears that threatened to fall.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s all I want. For you to trust me.\u201d Angel cupped her chin.<\/p>\n
Cordelia leaned in to his touch. \u201cI do.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood.\u201d Angel nudged her back so that their eyes met. \u201cSo, trust me now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI — okay.\u201d Cordelia didn\u2019t understand the change in Angel, but didn\u2019t question it. She wanted Angel to believe her and it seemed he now did.<\/p>\n
\u201cGo, upstairs and freshen up.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia\u2019s shoulders tightened. Tenderness and hotness aside, he\u2019d just ordered her to go upstairs and that just wasn\u2019t who she was.<\/p>\n
Except, she reasoned before any words could snap out, her face did feel a bit puffy. And she probably should look in a mirror soon or she\u2019d be really embarrassed and, she sighed, there was the way he touched her. She\u2019d hate to lose the tingling feeling along her skin just to prove a point that would most likely be moot because he was probably right.<\/p>\n
However, Cordelia paused in her acceptance of his order. \u201cAngel?\u201d<\/p>\n
As if reading her mind, he said, \u201cI have an idea on how we can stay within both Miss Twittle\u2019s instructions and your parameters.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia frowned. He didn\u2019t have to say that last part, especially so disapprovingly \u2026 She told him that she trusted him. He was acting like such a freak. Maybe she should just go upstairs and stay there.<\/p>\n
Again her doubts disappeared as Angel brushed his lips against her forehead. \u201cI believe you. And you\u2019re right. We don\u2019t need to take the chance of unwanted interruptions. Now go.\u201d He pushed her gently towards the stairs.<\/p>\n
Cordelia\u2019s mind finally caught up with her. No way was she letting a little sweetness make her into absolute putty. \u201cWhere are we going?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPizza. I saw the way you looked at that commercial.\u201d He turned his head towards the glow of the muted TV. \u201cWe\u2019ll order out and then leave to pick it up — thereby giving Darcy his independence per Miss Twittle. Then we\u2019ll eat out in the garden — so you don\u2019t have to be seen with me.\u201d His deep gaze flickered on her and then moved to rest on the floor.<\/p>\n
A surge of guilt pushed up from her toes. She couldn\u2019t stop herself from running towards him. \u201cThere is no way that I\u2019m ashamed to be seen with you.\u201d She bit her lip, searching for the very first thought she had of him. \u201cYou\u2019re salty goodness — a hottie.\u201d<\/p>\n
He frowned as he brushed her hands away. \u201cI\u2019m a vampire.\u201d<\/p>\n
She straightened her shoulders. \u201cYeah, a really hot one that happens to be MY friend.\u201d She brought her hands up again to his chest. \u201cAnd your idea sounds great. I\u2019ll just be a minute.\u201d<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Cordelia slumped on the bed hugging her knees. She peered through her blurry eyes at the envelopes on the dresser. She could no longer pretend that she could ever pay Angel back.<\/p>\n
She pressed the palms of her hands against her eyes. Sure he could be bossy, but all in all he was too nice, way too gorgeous, and had done so much for her. It was making the whole thing difficult. She\u2019d almost forgotten that he was a vampire, or rather, that his being a vampire should be an \u2018ewwy\u2019 turn off.<\/p>\n
She thought back at the hurt look in his eyes, a look she didn\u2019t ever want to see again. So she braced her shoulders and got up, cringing when she saw her reflection in the mirror.<\/p>\n
Angel had seen her with drippy eye-makeup. That would also never again, she vowed as she hurried to the bathroom.
\n***<\/p>\n
\u201cDarcy?\u201d Angel looked down at the whining kitten. \u201cFine,\u201d he said, picking Darcy up. \u201cYou\u2019ve got until Cordy comes back downstairs to be coddled. But, just to let you know, if you ruin this for me you\u2019ll be a door decoration.\u201d<\/p>\n
Darcy\u2019s dark eyes were rimmed with gold as he stared at Angel. Angel scratched the cat\u2019s head. \u201cYou aren\u2019t nearly big enough to pull that threat off. But, don\u2019t worry,\u201d Angel hugged the kitten. \u201cI want what you want — to keep Cordy here.\u201d<\/p>\n
Chapter 82<\/b><\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t you want another piece?\u201d Angel gestured to the pizza box on the stone bench between him and Cordelia.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve already had — \u201c Cordelia\u2019s eyes widened as her hand flew up. She coughed loudly in a panicked attempt to disguise her burp. At her failure, her head flew down to the cradle of her hands.<\/p>\n
\u201cStop laughing.\u201d She managed to sneak a glare at Angel. \u201cAfter all, you did it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMe?\u201d Angel pointed to his chest.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, it couldn\u2019t have been me. Cordelia Chase does not burp.\u201d She took her head with conviction. \u201cSo, therefore, it had to be you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel\u2019s smile grew wider. \u201cAs persuasive as your logic is — it\u2019s just not true. The \u2018huge\u2019,\u201d he held his hands out,\u201d \u2013 burp was all Cordelia Chase. You know —,\u201d Angel paused and cocked his head at the side door.<\/p>\n
Cordelia crossed her arms and raised a brow. \u201cWhat?\u201d Her reproach belied that delight she felt. She should be mortified and angry that he was teasing her about such an uncouth thing but she was having too much fun watching him smile.<\/p>\n
\u201cI hear Darcy scrambling to hide. Maybe you should go in and explain to him that the ungodly noise came from you and not some monster waiting to devour him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo, says a devouring monster,\u201d she automatically retorted.<\/p>\n
\u201cExcuse me, a HOT devouring monster, thank you very much,\u201d Angel corrected.<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah, well, whoever said that was truly delusional.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh NO. You can\u2019t take something like that back. Once labeled a \u2018hottie\u2019 by Cordelia Chase it\u2019s permanent.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPfft. She that giveth can take awayths.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel snorted. \u201cThat\u2019s not right.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt is, too. So, watch it, buster, or you\u2019ll be labeled a \u2018non-hottie\u2019 just like that.\u201d She snapped her fingers and then sighed.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia looked at the side door and then back to Angel. \u201cCan you really hear Darcy? I haven\u2019t heard a peep out of him since we left to get pizza. It\u2019s been hours. AND I am NOT a worry wort.\u201d She stuck her tongue at Angel\u2019s patronizing look.<\/p>\n
\u201cRight, because a NON-worry-wort would\u2019ve told me to get pizza while she waited outside the door — just in case.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah, well, it could\u2019ve been necessary. You didn\u2019t have to go all \u2018Tarzan\u2019 and drag me away.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou would\u2019ve caved after two seconds of his whining. I HAD to drag you away — for his own good. And I had Miss Twittle to think about it. She scares me.\u201d He faked a shiver.<\/p>\n
\u201cHmmph.\u201d She crossed her arms. The she leaned closer to Angel and threw all pretext of joking aside. \u201cDo you really hear him?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordy, he\u2019s fine.\u201d Angel moved closer and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.<\/p>\n
\u201cI know,\u201d she shrugged. \u201cBut, he\u2019s such a little guy. What if something happened to him? I\u2019d never forgive myself.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou really do have an amazing heart, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia squirmed on the stone bench as Angel cupped her chin. She could feel the blush spreading from her toes upward and she nudged Angel\u2019s had away. \u201cYeah, tell that to the Sunnydale High populace.\u201d She didn\u2019t want to bring up Buffy or the Scoobies again. No matter what Angel said, mention Buffy and he got weird.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow about I take out a billboard?\u201d Angel said softly as he brushed his thumb along her chin.<\/p>\n
Cordelia licked her lips. She couldn\u2019t be sure whether the tingling in her belly was the result of his words or his touch but she did know that he had all the signs of wanting to kiss her.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel?\u201d She cringed as she heard the want in her voice. She shook her head for clarity. \u201cAngel, what do you want from me?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou,\u201d he said simply.<\/p>\n
Cordelia didn\u2019t have a chance to respond before his lips met hers. She couldn\u2019t stop her tongue from meeting his any more than she could stop her fingers from entangling in the thick hair at the nape of his neck.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d she whispered.<\/p>\n
Angel chuckled, \u201c\u2019 Queen C\u2019 has to ask why?\u201d<\/p>\n
She lurched back as if he\u2019d thrown a bucket of cold water on her and stood on shaky legs. It was only after she masked her hurt and anger that she turned towards him.<\/p>\n
\u201cGee, I don\u2019t know Angel.\u201d She made her smile pageant-perfect. \u201cSo far, my only appeal to vampires has been as — well — food.\u201d She forced her fake smile into one of question. \u201cIs that it? Were you just tenderizing me?\u201d<\/p>\n
Pretending to think, she tapped her forefinger against her chin. \u201cBut, maybe that\u2019s not it. After all, you\u2019ve ignored my \u2018Queen C\u2019 charms for over a year.\u201d She narrowed her eyes, her anger winning over her attempt to be cutting. \u201cMaybe the \u2018curse\u2019 has a loop hole and you want some \u2018lovin\u2019 that doesn\u2019t have any strings attached. If that\u2019s the case, find a bimbo, hell I\u2019ll give you a couple of names, but leave me alone.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel yanked her down on the stone bench.<\/p>\n
\u201cLet me go.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNot until we get a couple of things straight,\u201d he said, staring her down.<\/p>\n
Cordelia squirmed. \u201cYou can\u2019t force —\u201c<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t kid yourself.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia tried to jerk back but his hand didn\u2019t budge.<\/p>\n
\u201cAll I want is for you to listen. Can you do that?\u2019<\/p>\n
Cordelia felt helpless against his strength. She was starting to get scared.<\/p>\n
Suddenly his grip changed and he rubbed her back gently.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d he whispered. \u201cI was just teasing — just like when you called me a devouring monster. That\u2019s all.\u201d<\/p>\n
She narrowed her eyes. \u201cSo, the kissing was teasing? That\u2019s not very funny.\u201d She tried to stand, but he pulled her back down.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot the kiss, Cordy,\u201d Angel said softly, \u201cCalling you Queen C. The kiss was only the beginning of what I want.<\/p>\n
The intensity of his gaze stopped her movements.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not \u2018Queen C\u2019 to me. You\u2019re YOU, the real you. Who, insists that I share my meals with you.\u201d He gestured down to the empty container by the bench. \u201cYou make me laugh.\u201d He brought his hand up and traced his forefinger along her cheek. \u201cYou make me believe that being a vampire doesn\u2019t have to be a life full of guilt and regret.\u201d He tipped her chin up. \u201cThat\u2019s why I want you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia wanted so badly to get lost in his words, except there was a tickle of common sense that refused to let her fall completely.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat about the curse?\u201d<\/p>\n
She had to know. No matter what feelings Angel\u2019s kisses brought forth she couldn\u2019t \u2013 wouldn\u2019t take the chance of unleashing Angelus.<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Angel continued to hold Cordelia\u2019s chin as the impact of her question hit him. He should\u2019ve known that Cordy would need assurance.<\/p>\n
He gentled his touch and dropped his forehead against hers, deciding that the truth was the only option. \u201cI don\u2019t know why, Cordy, but while hell offered me a hundred years of torture, it also gave me a permanent soul. There is no more \u2018Angelus\u2019 — just me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia blinked. \u201cIf that was true than you and Buffy —\u201c Angel tightened his grip around her jaw and forced her eyes to his. \u201cI told you this was about us. Buffy has nothing to with it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia jerked back but Angel held her close. He knew that he could possibly leave bruises. But he couldn\u2019t stand that Cordelia threw Buffy in his face again. So, he stared down the tears welling in her eyes and tightened his grip.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat everybody — meaning you, Buffy, and the so-called Scoobies \u2013 seem to forget,\u201d he said as his eyes held Cordy\u2019s \u201cis that I\u2019ve been what I am for almost 250 years. Angst and futility are NOT what I want. I\u2019m sick of being burdened with the past. I want the promise of the future.\u201d<\/p>\n
He heard her gasp. \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d Angel released his grip and brushed his fingertips along her face. \u201cI just want you, only you.\u201d He said, tenderly cupping her face towards his.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh,\u201d Cordelia whispered, feeling extremely uneasy.<\/p>\n
\u201cOh — yes,\u201d Angel repeated his whisper, his fingers leaving a tingling along her cheek. \u201cOnly you. Please, Cordy, let me have you,\u201d he murmured against her cheek.<\/p>\n
Cordelia whimpered. Her mind was still full of doubts, but her body was already giving in.<\/p>\n
Then he kissed her again and she didn\u2019t care anymore.<\/p>\n