Part 26<\/b><\/p>\n
Fred wandered around the empty hotel. She probably should just go upstairs to bed and try to catch a few more hours of sleep before the dawn turned into late morning.<\/p>\n
The problem was she wasn\u2019t really tired but rather kind of anxious. Fred frowned, she shouldn\u2019t be anxious. Everything was turning out all right; in fact, things were better than they had been in forever. Angel was back, soul soon to be secure permanently, Cordelia was back, they were in love -and could be happy, Wesley was back, Lorne was back, Connor was sort of back, hanging around and watching, but at least not trying to dump his father in a deep hole or ocean anymore.<\/p>\n
Things were on the way up.<\/p>\n
Fred paced in wide circles, her frown still pronounced. All should be good, except Cordelia hadn\u2019t been happy. Fred was more than a little surprised that when Cordy asked her to take her home the other woman meant her apartment rather than the hotel.<\/p>\n
Shoot, Cordy had been spending most nights at the hotel with Angel when he didn\u2019t have an anchored soul, now that he did, or would as soon as Wesley did the spell, she didn\u2019t want to. It didn\u2019t make any sense and Fred didn\u2019t like it when things weren\u2019t logical. Even the most supernatural and weird things had some sort of logic to them, but Cordy being so sad now wasn\u2019t logical.<\/p>\n
Fred blew out a deep burst of air. Well, she wouldn\u2019t have been able to sleep anyway until she knew that the guys were safe. Fred flopped down at her computer. If she couldn\u2019t decipher Cordelia\u2019s long sad silence, then Fred would focus on something productive rather than the confusing and worrisome.<\/p>\n
Determined Fred sat at her computer and re-registered for detective classes, though this time she would stick with the on-line course. She didn\u2019t want to be kicked out again for missing too many classes. Fred grimaced. She hated that. Fred never-ever-ever had skipped classes before. Fred sighed. Of course, she hadn\u2019t had demons to investigate or zombies to trap when she was in high school or at the university.<\/p>\n
Fred looked up as Wesley and Gunn entered the hotel. Her eyes widen when she saw Connor follow then her brows scrunched. \u201cWhere\u2019s Angel. Shouldn\u2019t he be running in- or did he go the sewers, but I didn\u2019t see him come in. Where\u2019s Angel?\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley put down his bag of weapons. \u201cHe\u2019s not here?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo one\u2019s here. Cordelia wanted to go her apartment, which I don\u2019t understand and Lorne\u2019s not here either- I guess, he wanted to stay with the Furies,\u201d Fred shrugged. “Which I don’t understand, either.”<\/p>\n
\u201cI do and so not the picture I needed,\u201d Gunn grumbled from the weapon\u2019s cabinet. \u201cTold you, Wes, Angel took the sewer-cut to Cordy\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley rubbed at his forehead. \u201cI just commented that I didn\u2019t think he would as the spell hasn\u2019t been performed yet.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMan, I wasn\u2019t saying he was jumping her bones and bumping and grinding.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCharles,\u201d Fred cocked her head towards Connor\u2019s narrowed stare. \u201cConnor, are you hungry, we\u2019ll could go get breakfast, or Charles, maybe you could go get some breakfast burritos. Connor, you\u2019ll like them, they\u2019re delicious.\u201d Fred finished quickly, hoping to divert the teenager\u2019s attention from Gunn and his comment.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was hoping to get some sleep, girl. Oh, all right,\u201d Gunn shrugged at Fred\u2019s stare, perching on the corner of her desk.<\/p>\n
Connor tugged on Gunn\u2019s sleeve. \u201cWhy would Angel jump Cordelia\u2019s bones, you said he didn\u2019t lose his soul. What do you mean? What\u2019s bumping and grinding?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe didn\u2019t- that-,\u201d Gunn cleared his throat. \u201cLook, kid, I\u2019ll teach you how to drive, but the \u2018jumping bones and bumping and grinding\u2019 that\u2019s daddy talk.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCharles, really,\u201d Wesley shook his head. \u201cConnor, what Charles meant was\u2026.that\u2026..that,\u201d Wesley started to stutter, “that is a topic that should be explained by your father.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s what I said.\u201d Gunn gestured in the air.<\/p>\n
\u201cCharles, weren\u2019t you on your way out to get breakfast,\u201d Fred cut in shaking her head.<\/p>\n
\u201cSure, probably won\u2019t see Angel or Cordelia until tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d Wesley shook his head. \u201cThe spell must be done if they\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWesley, Geez, calm down. Why are you always so paranoid.\u201d Fred chastised.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not, it\u2019s that\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWes, they aren\u2019t going too risk anything now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI would feel more secure if\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel\u2019s here.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight, I would feel\u2026. OH,\u201d Wesley turned to where Fred was pointing. \u201cAngel, you\u2019re here.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel ignored Wesley and stared at his son. \u201cConnor,\u2026..you\u2026are you staying, are you hungry? How are you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor pulled back at the direct questions.<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, he\u2019s hungry, Charles was about to go out and get us all some breakfast.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, okay, good.\u201d Angel nodded. He moved towards the stairs, pausing before he went up. \u201cIf you’re tired after you can stay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, when do you want to do the spell, it isn\u2019t something that should be put off too long.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel paused again. \u201cLater.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNot now, Wesley. I\u2019m not in a happy mood, so don\u2019t worry.\u201d Angel said sharply continuing his ascent up to his room.<\/p>\n
Gunn smacked at Wesley\u2019s arm. \u201cDawg, told you that something was wrong with him.\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley\u2019s puzzled gaze followed the somber vampire. \u201cProbably still just a little overwhelmed about the concept and mad at Wolfram & Hart.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight, keep on telling yourself that.\u201d Gunn said. \u201cHey, kid, you want to go with me to pick up the grub, I\u2019ll go over the basics of driving my baby on the way.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019ll let me drive?\u201d Connor tore his eyes from the retreating back of his father.<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t say that, I said I\u2019d go over the basics.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, alright.\u201d<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Angel turned away from the sight below. His son was home- well, at least going to stay and eat breakfast with his family. His son was slowly accepting them, and maybe also Angel. The vampire should be happy. But, all he could think about was Cordelia.<\/p>\n
The brief flicker of hope that descended over him when Cordelia couldn\u2019t hide her worry about him going out in the sun disappeared as he wandered the sewers back to the hotel. Like he thought before not wishing him dead wasn\u2019t the same as forgiving him and still loving him.<\/p>\n
The heavy curtains blocked out all light, sinking the room into darkness. Angel stared at the wall of his bedroom remembering and reliving each action and each word that he used as a weapon against Cordelia too make her fear real.<\/p>\n
Was it possible she could understand why he did it? Angel thought back to the sight of the hurt and angry young woman, first terrified chained to the bed, and then watching him with untouchable pain and coldness at his attempt to explain. Angel winced his eyes closed at the imagines. Cordelia in pain was never a sight he could stand and to know that he was the one to cause that look of betrayal on her beautiful face had him wishing for the sun\u2019s blaze.<\/p>\n
Angel\u2019s fingers clenched into tight fists, truthfully though he didn\u2019t have much doubt that Cordelia could understood why he did it. What he was truly afraid of was that it wouldn\u2019t be enough for her to forgive or to accept. Angel swore when he was allowed into Cordy\u2019s apartment that he would tell the truth, no evasions, and no excuses.<\/p>\n
But god, Angel wished he hadn\u2019t explained about his mark and its implication. How was Cordelia ever going to accept that? Angel should\u2019ve just let it remain as a meaningless act done under the guise of Angelus.<\/p>\n
Angel\u2019s intense gaze centered on the clock, Cordy said he would see her tomorrow. It was tomorrow now, so when did she mean? Angel leaned back in his chair. He had to be patient.<\/p>\n
Part 27<\/b><\/p>\n
Cordelia pushed at the brick wall, kicking at the solid barrier when nothing happened. She read the slip of paper again. Scrunching up her brow, Cordelia scanned the red bricks closer; taking another look at the paper she placed her fingertips on the obscure marks and pushed reciting the words written.<\/p>\n
Cordelia fell forward meeting no more resistance as she tumbled downward.<\/p>\n
\u201cOw,\u201d Cordelia pulled herself up to her feet, brushing off her pants as she looked around. It looked exactly the same as when Skip showed her Angel pleading to the Conduits. Well, actually, when he called her weak and not a hero. Cordelia scrunched up her face\u2026Angel called her a rich girl from Sunnydale. Hmmph.<\/p>\n
It was that show and tell which convinced her to take the Powers offer of her life as it should\u2019ve been in an angry hurt huff. Cordelia rolled her eyes. She should\u2019ve known that Angel hadn\u2019t meant it like she heard. She wondered why Skip even brought her there to only show a misleading portion of Angel\u2019s conversation. Geez, had the Powers not wanted her to choose Angel.<\/p>\n
Cordelia\u2019s head spun around and her body twirled as words floated on a sudden brisk breeze.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt does not belong here, we did not call it. Leave.\u201d The chanting repeated.<\/p>\n
Cordelia pushed against the wind that pressed her towards the wall. \u201cHey, stop it. I\u2019m not going anywhere until I get some answers and I\u2019m not an \u2018it\u2019.\u201d She shouted.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnswers can not be told but must be realized. Choices must be made as choices have been made. We can not help it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201c Choices, what kind of choices. I\u2019ve made choices. I chose demon DNA. I chose the visions. I chose the mission. I think I deserve some answers and stop calling me IT.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201c Its value to the mission has been compromised. Its strength has been compromised.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia narrowed her eyes, picking a spot in the empty chamber to glare at. \u201cCompromised? What are you talking about? And stop shouting in the wind, you\u2019re making me dizzy.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia.\u201d Skip emerged from the wall, the wind and voices stopping at his appearance.<\/p>\n
The young woman blinked backing up. \u201cOh, no you don\u2019t. I\u2019m not falling for that one again. How do I know you’re real and not some other Disney version of cute evilness?\u201d<\/p>\n
The large bronze demon rolled his eyes. \u201cCordelia, you are in the presence of the Conduits, the good guys.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHmmph. Right. And Wolfram & Hart abducted me with major glowiness and floating. I\u2019m not reassured.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia, would Wolfram & Hart know that my favorite movie is Matrix with Trinity all dodging and kicking and that Gladiator was overrated,\u201d Repeating parts of his and Cordelia\u2019s conversation when he was guiding her in the construct of the Mall, during her birthday coma.<\/p>\n
\u201cMaybe, how can I know for sure?\u201d<\/p>\n
Skip let out a deep breath. \u201cHow about this\u2026 Small town girl\/In the big time world- kuh-kuh-kuh- Cordy\/kuh-kuh-kuh-Cordy\/Design\u2019 fashion is her life\u2019s passion Kuh-kuh-kuh-Cordy\/kuh-kuh-kuh-Cordy\/Forget Gucci, Prada and Versace\u2026..,\u201d singing the words to opening of Cordy, the TV show that had made Cordelia famous in her alternate life.<\/p>\n
Cordelia covered her ears. \u201cEww, you suck, you\u2019re worse than Angel in the singing department.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHey,\u201d Skip huffed offended.<\/p>\n
\u201cSkip, why are you here?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou were getting dizzy, so, here I am.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLook, all I want to know is what did my visions mean, the one of me and the one of Angelus.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you think they meant?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf I knew, I wouldn\u2019t be here.\u201d Cordelia rolled her eyes.<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia, I can\u2019t tell you, the Conduits can\u2019t.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWon\u2019t you mean.\u201d Cordelia kicked at the ground.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhatever,\u201d Skip shrugged.<\/p>\n
Cordelia starting pacing and shaking her head, \u201c the vision of me- how could that possibly be interpreted as a warning about Wolfram & Hart. How? It was just me saying I love Angel.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWho says Wolfram & Hart was the threat?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAh Duh, little evil Pollyanna, torture for a month. Definitely a threat that should\u2019ve been avoided.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally Cordelia, have warnings about Wolfram & Hart\u2019s plans been the norm?\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia scrunched up her face trying to remember one time she had a vision of an actual plan of the law firms, one where she ended up as the victim. She couldn\u2019t remember getting the big old warning when Vocah or that big-headed-freak messed with her brain. \u201cIf it wasn\u2019t that\u2026why would I be warned about loving Angel? Was the vision telling me that I don\u2019t, reverse psychologically crap- but that\u2019s stupid, I do love Angel. That doesn\u2019t make any sense.\u201d Cordelia looked to the big demon for answers.<\/p>\n
Skip shook his head, shrugging.<\/p>\n
\u201cDamn you.\u201d Cordelia grumbled. \u201cWhy would I be warned about loving Angel or that he was Angelus? Sure, I could understand getting a vision of Angelus to warn us not to go to Anita\u2019s if that was what happened, but it\u2019s not. Angelus didn\u2019t make an appearance.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou didn\u2019t heed either of them.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know, but the first made no sense as a vision and the second, well, I just\u2026.was wrong in that I thought it was a nightmare. I was having a lot of them at the time\u2026.anyway, that\u2019s beside the point, the question is why have a vision warning me of a non-existent danger.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWas it non-existent, Angelus did appear.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, that was Angel pretending to be Angelus, he never lost his soul.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPretending?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe didn\u2019t lose his soul.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBut was he pretending to be Angelus?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2026\u201d Cordelia started to repeat her statement, but huffed instead at Skip\u2019s meaning behind his question. \u201cNo. He was and is Angelus. Fine, I get that. But, Angelus or Angel or THAT vampire- if you really want to be simple-, isn\u2019t a danger to me or the mission, if THAT vampire has a soul and Angel did, does, and will for good now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s with all the questions? Angel has his soul, he wouldn\u2019t\u2026.\u201d Cordelia took a deep breath and studied Skip. \u201cI wish I could believe that last question of doubt was a warning that Wesley\u2019s spell wasn\u2019t any good but it wasn\u2019t was it. The Powers were warning me about Angel- short and simple. They want me to doubt him- even with his permanent soul, they want me to doubt him.\u201d Cordelia shook her head. \u201c Wow. Little evil Pollyanna wasn’t so far off in her impersonation of the Powers. Why do the Powers want me to doubt Angel? They chose him as their champion- nobody could argue he begged for the job.”<\/p>\n
Skip shook his head. \u201cNot to doubt, Cordelia, but to prepare you and to give you the chance to choose NOT to set certain unpredictable wheels in motion, to choose NOT to love the champion. It has been foretold that the vampire with a soul will play a major role in the upcoming Apocalypse, but his exact role has not been defined. It will be defined by the choices he makes and now by the choices you will make.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia blinked, wondering if she was the only sane person in the world. \u201cThe Powers wanted me NOT to love Angel- that\u2019s what the first vision was about? Uh? A lot late and NOT effective in getting the point across.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHad you understood, you could\u2019ve chosen not to tell him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhose fault was that\u2026the vision wasn\u2019t actually clear or scary rather it was pretty damn encouraging and bringing to light what I had been denying for god knows how long. Maybe they should\u2019ve sent the \u2018Angelus\u2019 vision first. At least that would\u2019ve been scary.\u201d Cordelia rubbed her face. \u201cBut even if they had it wouldn\u2019t have really changed anything. I would still have loved Angel.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, unfortunately. Loving the champion has complicated and compromised the mission. The Power\u2019s feel that a wrong choice on your part now could affect the vampire\u2019s future choices possibly detrimentally.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHold on- The Powers didn\u2019t WANT me to love Angel, but now that I do- they\u2019re emotionally blackmailing me to forgive him so as not to upset any future decisions on Angel\u2019s part regarding the mission, that\u2019s what your saying isn\u2019t it? Geez, I thought you couldn\u2019t tell me what my visions meant, I wish you had kept to that story.\u201d<\/p>\n
Skip shrugged. \u201cYou love the vampire with a soul- the Power\u2019s champion, you told him, he now needs you in a way that was not expected or acceptable, yet, it has been done. In your decision to love the champion, you have allowed yourself to become his greatest weakness. You must be prepared to live with the consequences of your choices. You must not upset the balance of matters anymore than you already have.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m so outta of here, you can toss me through the walls anytime now.\u201d Cordelia waved angrily into the air.
\n\u201cCordelia.\u201d Skip cautioned in a loud stern tone.<\/p>\n
\u201cSkip, you were right the first time, the Powers have no comprehension about love. Angel won\u2019t accept a forced forgiveness from me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI thought you understood the warrior\u2019s need for you. He did tell you did he not. It is your rejection that must be feared -that is what could upset the balance of things as they are.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGet me outta here. It was a mistake to come.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia, your choice\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIs my choice, free will and all that if it screws up fate or destiny, tough. You\u2019ll know my decision when I make it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia.\u201d Skip warned.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve heard and now I\u2019m ignoring.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia.\u201d The big demon repeated.<\/p>\n
\u201cSkip. I’m not listening.”<\/p>\n
\u201cFine.\u201d<\/p>\n
In a flash Cordelia was back in her apartment.<\/p>\n
Cordelia stomped around, mumbling and kicking the sofa. Stupid Powers. Cordelia flopped on the cushions. She wasn\u2019t going to be forced into anything, not by the Powers or by Angel.<\/p>\n