Part 21<\/b><\/p>\n
Cordelia fell forward as the bright light diminished.<\/p>\n
The vampire sat on the bed, holding her shoulders down. \u201cDefinitely need a refund. Soul gone, non-consenting stuff, cuz I sure didn\u2019t consent to that. Though, it might be fun.\u201d He crawled closer over Cordelia\u2019s squirming body.<\/p>\n
\u201cI told you, I didn\u2019t do what I did because of hate or anger, but out of pleasure and pain, don\u2019t you ever listen to me, obviously not and look where you are now.\u201d The vampire rolled on his back landing on Cordelia\u2019s stomach. \u201cRage and anger are the soul\u2019s doing. Boring, but true. Don\u2019t care, no anger, no rage. So easy without a soul, so damn easy to take what you want.\u201d<\/p>\n
The vampire trailed a slow stroke down Cordelia\u2019s side, turning to face her. \u201cYou think you know me so well, but you don\u2019t understand the freedom of not caring, the thrill of taking what you want. I was wrong, I have learned to hate again. I hate the soul that prohibited the freedom to take the pain and pleasure without restraint, just like I hate those that made me adhere to it. You being the biggest offender of all- worse than the slayer, even. Always believing that I could do it making me want to do it making me believe for that brief moment that it could be done.<\/p>\n
But you failed to understand and what the soul tried to ignore, is that I am my demon the soul didn’t change that. And half the time, I didn’t want to be that good person, with the best heart that you claimed I was. Do you know how many times I wanted to snap your neck because you wouldn’t just let me do what I wanted or just fuck you until you bled, but you wouldn’t have like that, and the soul would’ve gotten all miserable and god forbid stuttery. \u201d He swiftly plopped on her chest, face to face. \u201cNothing to say.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia gulped back her tears. \u201cWhy aren\u2019t I dead?\u201d<\/p>\n
The vampire gazed her into her eyes and down along her body. \u201cBecause you don\u2019t fear death. I learned watching you suffer for two years from the visions. Not saying a word. You accept pain and death, like you deserve it or something. So, I\u2019m stuck trying to find out exactly what you fear the most.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, I\u2019m not even sure that\u2019s true, though you should.\u201d The vampire studied the young woman. \u201cWesley, \u201c he eyes lightened. \u201cGunn\u201d he laughed. \u201cFred. Ooh, getting closer, at what point will you break, Connor?\u201d Angel leaned up. \u201cConnor? You don\u2019t even really like him right now, you blame him\u2026. yet, you do still fear for him, don\u2019t you, left over mommy feelings, what? You can tell me, I\u2019ll keep your secret.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia flinched at his beckoning tone. \u201cDon\u2019t underestimate Connor. He did manage to put Angel in a box.\u201d Cordelia struggled trying to pull up her power again.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe put ME in the box, Cordelia, I wasn\u2019t absent for that. But, that was then, this is now, NOW I won\u2019t be whining and trying to \u2018reason\u2019 with him. No, I\u2019ll just be ripping the little bastards head off. But then again, maybe I’ll be creative; after all Holtz already talked me up big, can’t just rest on my laurels.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you want from me?\u201d Cordelia tried to jerk away.<\/p>\n
“You got me thinking, maybe I do need an new eternal crazy evil pet.”<\/p>\n
Cordelia gulped then glared. “Go find Justine, then.\u201d<\/p>\n
“Did I tell you how magnificent you were, but no, \u2018eww\u2019, I did tell you that.”<\/p>\n
Cordelia blinked at the expression on his face.<\/p>\n
The vampire laughed. “Sweet Fred might be fun, but really no challenge it wouldn’t take much to get her running back to her cave and babbling. But she is darling.”<\/p>\n
“Don’t, please.”<\/p>\n
“Then she’ll probably want to turn her boyfriend or maybe she’ll just want to play with him awhile. I’ll encourage either. Wesley, though, and that kid are dead.” The vampire pondered out loud, washing over Cordelia\u2019s plea.<\/p>\n
“You haven’t mentioned my place in this grand scheme of yours yet.” Cordelia tugged again in at the manacles.<\/p>\n
The vampire leaned in, whispering, “Take everything I ever wanted from you of course. The question is then what. You’ve been the bane of my existence for so long, but you would also make a helluva vampire, beautiful, loyal, strong, a great fuck, and without the soul, I wouldn’t even hate you. But, I don’t know, do I want to reward you for making me so goddamn miserable and happy. Tough call. What do you think? You did promise to be with me for always.”<\/p>\n
“Not you, never you.”<\/p>\n
“You say tomato, I say tamahto.”<\/p>\n
“I don’t care what you do to me.” Cordelia jerked again.<\/p>\n
“I know, which is why I’m not in a real hurry to torture you. Exactly, how many times have you been tortured?” The vampire rolled on his back, using her chest as a cushion, holding up his fingers counting,” the eyes\u2019 auction, nah, I’m not counting that one, no real damage, and I’m not counting the demon spawn babies, either, you asked for that, so what, Vocah, I\u2019ll give you that one, and I\u2019ll give you the major head fuck by Wolfram & Hart\u2019s bigheaded freak, but not the Skilosh\u2019s little skull hurting spawn, that only lasted an instant. Actually,\u201d Angel leaned up, \u201cWhat\u2019s with you and demon babies, had I had any balls with a soul, you might\u2019ve been Connor\u2019s mommy. Oh well.\u201d Angel sighed lying back. \u201cYou haven’t been tortured by any real pros, so maybe I should. What exactly did that little girl bitch do to you again?”<\/p>\n
“I doubt you could even beat the Plyean Priests.”<\/p>\n
The vampire narrowed his eyes. “What Plyean Priest?”<\/p>\n
“The ones that suck hot irons in my head.”<\/p>\n
“You were just complaining, you said it wasn\u2019t bad- nothing about hot irons.”<\/p>\n
“I lied, but if you want torture- torture away. I wish you would and STOP talking.” Cordelia tried to kick out.<\/p>\n
The vampire turned searching her face, \u201cOf course you lied. Should\u2019ve known. When haven\u2019t you lied about the pain- tell me Cordelia, will you lie about this pain?\u201d The vampire sat up and laughed. \u201cYou will, just like you want me to hurt you. You want me to hurt you, that way you can keep saying over and over- it’s Angelus, it’s Angelus – not Angel- and block it out like you block every other painful thing in your life. This hurts you more doesn’t it?” Knowing that I am him. Which do you fear more, me, touching you softly, ” gently padding his fingers along her neck,<\/p>\n
“or ripping into your skin?\u201d? The vampire smiled. ” I know the answer, loving you- would destroy you, making you gasp and squirm at my touch.” He moved down, his hand released to curve over her breast, gentling teasing, hardening the nipple. “That was pretty easy. How about this,\u201d the vampire trailed his hand down, cupping her center with a caress. \u201cSo hot.” He murmured.<\/p>\n
Cordelia flinched trying to jerk her hips away.<\/p>\n
The vampire rested his chin on her belly, staring up. Cordelia had squeezed her eyes closed, but that didn’t stop the tears from streaming.<\/p>\n
The vampire closed his eyes at the sight, “Shh, baby, it will be alright,” he whispered. His lips moving with gentle kisses to embrace the center.<\/p>\n
Cordelia’s eyes shot open. It was Angel’s touch, Angel’s voice, his lips that was touching. She winced, knowing that if she closed her eyes again she would believe it. Cordy forced herself to remember the smirk, the sardonic laughter, and the cold eyes that made his lack of soul apparent and dangerous. Angelus was mocking her love for Angel and she hated him for it. She yelled, jerking her hips harder. This was real, she reminded herself.<\/p>\n
It was her vision. Imagines flashed again, pictures of the sneering handsome face juxtaposed on the loving one. Angel vs. Angelus- Angelus vs. Angel-the same face of both flashed through her head. They were the same. This was madness, this was\u2026.Cordelia gulped looking at the dark head between her thighs touching gently, trying to give her pleasure, a sickness engulfed her as her body responded and her mind came to an impossible conclusion.<\/p>\n
\u201cTold you,\u201d The vampire leaned up, his face void of all expression.<\/p>\n
Cordelia gulped swallowing shallow breaths as her muscles tried to calm. She narrowed her eyes. \u201cYou don\u2019t seem that happy in that ‘I told you so’. Why? Maybe it wasn\u2019t you, maybe I was just not through with getting laid, good fuck that I am and all.\u201d She moved dragging her legs away from the vampire. \u201cYou are good too, you know, must be all those years of practice. Practice makes perfect, I guess mines just talent.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLook at you trying so hard, you\u2019ve got you\u2019re brave cocky Cordy face on \u2013 the \u2018no one can touch me face,\u201d The vampire leaned up studying the young woman, the tears were gone, the heat was still at the tips of his fingers, on the taste of his tongue, but she was cold to look at.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou can\u2019t\u2026\u201d she slowly shook her head, her eyes momentarily shifting from the vampire\u2019s mocking gaze. \u201cYou can\u2019t touch me not anymore, not now.\u201d Cordelia jerked her head to face the vampire head on. \u201c So, did you want to do more or are we done,\u201d<\/p>\n
The vampire narrowed his eyes. \u201cYou have no idea what I can do to you.\u201d He leaned caressing Cordelia\u2019s clenched jaw. \u201cMy Cordy, so untouchable, but touchable to me, always to me. I found your worse fear,\u201d the vampire leaned back over Cordelia\u2019s body, his hand now resting on the scar on her stomach. \u201cNow you can\u2019t hide. I told you that I liked this, I lied.\u201d He pressed at the old wound. \u201cThe moron\u2019s mark, made because you loved him, hate it want it gone.\u201d The vampire moved his fangs sinking around the marred flesh, piercing, and sucking making the scar his own.<\/p>\n
Cordelia yelled, clenched her eyes closed, tensing her body as hands settled her hips to the bed. Through the fire in her brain she could hear the slurping of lips on flesh, drinking possessing her to the fullest. Her hands grasped around the iron bars, not moving just waiting for it to be over. S<\/p>\n
he\u2026.Cordelia groaned as the pain was magically transformed into ease, the sucking hadn\u2019t stopped but the force was gone, now it was gentle, the strength still held her but it was soft, beckoning and tempting. That\u2019s when rage filled her and hate sprang to mind, she jerked again forcing the fangs that had become gentle to rip into her skin, causing a jagged tear and forced a scream from her throat.<\/p>\n
\u201cDamn\u2019t, Cordelia, don\u2019t.\u201d The vampire jerked up, slamming his hands down on her, making her body still, his lips this time coating the ripped flesh, kissing and tonguing, stopping the flow of blood that Cordelia\u2019s move generated.<\/p>\n
Cordelia leaned up on the bed, the tenderness of his actions causing her tears to start falling again. \u201cJust stop\u2026just stop. Please just stop\u201d Her voice broken.<\/p>\n
The vampire leaned up licking his lips. \u201cI take it you don\u2019t love me anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia refused to answer her eyes squeezing tighter, her head shaking, anger expounding at the vampires words and a hurt indescribable.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhatever I am? You can\u2019t handle it. You\u2019re too cocky for your own good, should\u2019ve realized it early on you can\u2019t love a vampire \u2013 they\u2019ll always bite you in the end.\u201d The vampire swung to the side of the bed, his shoulders slumped.<\/p>\n
Cordelia opened her eyes to stare at the naked broad back, signs of earlier lovemaking still apparent of the pale flesh. She clenched her jaw, never in her twenty some years and multiple of experiences had she wanted to kill a being so. The power surged through her body, pulsating, not needing a guide.<\/p>\n
The manacles melted as the bars did. She jerked kicking at the broad back, pushing the vampire to the floor. She rolled searching, grabbing at the leather coat on the floor, yanking at the stakes she knew would be there. She lunged landing on the fallen vampire the wooden point pressed at the exact spot needed on his naked chest.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat, no struggle, where\u2019s that self preservation of Angelus I\u2019ve heard so much about,\u201d Cordelia glared at the hands that held her by the shoulders, not pushing just holding and the brown eyes that stared at her. The vampire waited. \u201cCome on, Angelus, its Angel that tries to commit yearly suicide or has bouts with self-destructing, not you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia bore the stake further breaking the skin. “Damn’t do something, say something, just how far are you willing to take this…. WHY?” She leaned up as she heard familiar voices call out her name and Angel\u2019s.<\/p>\n
She got up flinging the stake wide grabbing at a sheet, huddling an end at the blood that had started to flow again on her stomach, hiding it, wrapping the excess sheet around like a toga with the corners draped around her reddened wrists. Cordelia swirled to the vampire now leaning up against the wall.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou will get up, get dressed and shut up. Do it, Angel, now.\u201d She ordered, brushing the tears off her face with a corner of the sheet and faced the door as Wesley barged in.<\/p>\n
Angel slid up the wall, his eyes never leaving Cordelia. Her words her actions were all in slow motion as he watched her wave her hands, chastising their friend for kicking in the door. She poo ha the weapons that they were holding. Throwing up her hands as she yelled more. Angel watched as Wesley and Gunn stepped back lowering their weapons at the scowl of the woman. He saw Wesley hold out a pouch in a conciliatory motion. Angel focused in finally listening to the conversation.<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia, we weren\u2019t following you, though we should\u2019ve been. Right, whatever, but Cordy, Wolfram & Hart knew\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d Cordelia stepped forward her dramatic display quieted.<\/p>\n
Wesley stepped eagerly forward at the calm. \u201cYes and they had devised a spell to break the enchantment of this room,\u201d Wesley waved about. \u201cHoping for Angelus and you dead.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cUh?\u201d Cordelia shook her head. \u201cAngelus? That\u2019s Angel, been Angel, no soul lossage.” she pointed to the vampire still in the background but now listening.<\/p>\n
Angel slunk back. Deep down he had known but he had gone too far, so he had just continued hoping that he was mistaken. Cordelia had asked him how far he had been willing too take it, too far, but obviously not far enough and now Angel was damned in her eyes.<\/p>\n
Still, Angel stood straighter against the wall, it wasn\u2019t his plan for her to hate him like that, but it would accomplish what he needed. But god it hurt. Angel looked back at the young woman who was telling their friends the truth but ball faced lying at the same time. Why was she lying? God, he wished he could really understand that woman.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, good. Didn\u2019t think it would be once the Furies verified that the spell only effected the \u2018no violence\u2019 portion and Anita here explained the exact nature of the enchantment.\u201d<\/p>\n
The brothel owner poked her head in. \u201cNo broken furniture.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou didn\u2019t give us any,\u201d Cordelia huffed.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat did you do to the bed?\u201d Pointing to the melted iron.<\/p>\n
\u201cI kinda of glow at certain times.\u201d Cordelia shrugged.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou two are going to bankrupt me.\u201d She tisked.<\/p>\n
\u201cBill us,\u201d Cordelia glared. \u201cWesley, if you knew the spell didn\u2019t work\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t until very recently, so-\u201c He shrugged up his dart gun. \u201cThey\u2019re re-doing the \u2018no\u2019 violence portion as we speak.\u201d Wesley shrugged again. \u201cThough, violence really wasn\u2019t a concern not if the enchantment itself wasn\u2019t broken. It was just you and Angel.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, just me and Angel, safe as two peas in a pod,\u201d Cordelia laughed softly. \u201cSo what\u2019s in the pouch your swinging around like an idiot?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, the best part\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s a good part to all this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia, this was not a secret you should\u2019ve kept. Wolfram & Hart\u2019s goal\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWesley, the bag, lecture me later.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, I found the alternate spell\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cUh?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe gypsies had two, the one they used and this one.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m lost.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s wonderful,\u201d Fred chimed in.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, well,\u201d Wesley coughed. \u201cI can make Angel\u2019s soul permanent, so no fear of any more of Wolfram & Hart\u2019s games on that front,\u201d he waved the bag.<\/p>\n
Cordelia\u2019s eyes as well as Angel\u2019s were centered on that small pouch.<\/p>\n
Cordelia blinked. \u201cThat will work?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, I\u2019ve been working on it for the last few days and finally found the right spell.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia staggered forward. \u201cYou\u2019ve been what? For how long?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t want to tell you until I was sure, no false hopes and all.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia swayed and gulped.<\/p>\n
Angel moved, not knowing whether he wanted to kill the oh so helpfully good willed closed mouthed Wesley first or hold Cordelia. His decision was made on both counts when Cordelia jerked away and leaned into Wesley\u2019s suddenly outstretched arms. \u201cCordy, are you alright, you look pale.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNerves and annoyance, only.\u201d She clutched at Wesley\u2019s arms straightening only to stagger again.<\/p>\n
\u201cCordy,\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel moved even closer. His thoughts and instincts completely centered on the young woman in the other man\u2019s arms.<\/p>\n
Cordelia stepped back her balance steady. \u201cCan you believe it, vision. Vampires, um, waiting in the park to snack. You better go and quick, it will be dawn soon, but you can get there in time if you hurry, Fred you can take me home, right?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, \u201c Fred ran up worried at the paleness of Cordelia\u2019s face.<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia,\u201d Angel stepped forward saying the only words he said since Cordelia got loose.<\/p>\n
\u201cGo, Angel, be a champion, work for your soul, you need it – Or don\u2019t if it makes you too angry, do what you want.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordy,\u201d Fred said, holding out her arm as the other woman swayed again.<\/p>\n
\u201cFred, get them out, I need to get dressed,\u201d she said softly. \u201cPlease.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, too?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cPlease, Fred.\u201d<\/p>\n
Fred nodded puzzled, but shooed everyone, even grabbing Angel by the shirt and tugging him to the door. \u201cGo fight the vision, go, Cordy said you had to hurry. Make sure you have the blankets. \u201d She waved them all off.<\/p>\n
Once out of sight she turned to Cordelia. \u201cCordy,\u201d Fred started to re-enter.<\/p>\n
\u201cJust a minute Fred, I\u2019ll be out quick, okay.\u201d<\/p>\n
Fred bit her lips and nodded. She glanced at the closed door. She could get that Cordelia was angry that they all barged in on her and Angel, but what she didn\u2019t understand is the sadness of the vampire that left and the woman remaining in the room.<\/p>\n
Did neither of them hear that Wesley had the cure for Angel\u2019s happy curse?<\/p>\n
Cordelia slowly unwrapped the sheet, staring at the blood soaked portions as they fell to the floor. She tore at a clean part, shoving it next to the wound and hunted for her clothes, feeling dead inside.<\/p>\n