{"id":4008,"date":"2015-07-05T23:56:57","date_gmt":"2015-07-05T22:56:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/?p=4008"},"modified":"2015-07-06T01:00:29","modified_gmt":"2015-07-06T00:00:29","slug":"bad-timing-18","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/2015\/07\/05\/bad-timing-18\/","title":{"rendered":"Bad Timing. 18"},"content":{"rendered":"

Part 18<\/b>: Aftermath<\/em><\/p>\n

Hours later, Angel was staring at a teen pregnancy poster on the wall of the hospital waiting room. He had been looking at it for hours.<\/p>\n

There were plenty of magazines on the table and Fred and Gunn were there if he wanted to talk, but all he could handle right now was staring at the girl on the wall. Her eyes looked so sad. At least her eyes were open. When he had last seen Cordelia, her eyes had been closed. Fear gripped Angel.<\/p>\n

What if I never get a chance to see her eyes again?<\/i><\/p>\n

Everyone else had gone home around three, once a doctor had emerged from the intensive care unit and informed them that while Cordelia had not yet regained consciousness, her condition was no longer critical. They had pumped massive amounts of blood into her and she had a concussion, but all signs pointed to a full recovery.<\/p>\n

Too bad I won\u2019t be having a full recovery any time soon. <\/i>Angel had found relief in the doctors words but the intense fear was still there, coloring every moment that passed. He needed to see her. He needed to see those eyes, hear her heartbeat, watch her lips quirk into a smile. He needed Cordelia.<\/p>\n

And this time, I\u2019m going to make sure she hears it, how important she is to me. And then we\u2019re going to take her back home and send the Scoobies back to the Hellmouth and I\u2019m going to sit her down and tell her\u2026What? What can I possibly tell her? <\/i><\/p>\n

That despite the fact that I\u2019m a vampire and despite the fact that she found me kissing Buffy, I\u2019d really like to take her out sometime? That I like her in a more than friends way and that should cancel out the fact that she has suffered more pain than any person deserves in a lifetime? <\/i>Angel thought back to the question he had asked Lorne the night of the ballet. What could he possibly offer Cordelia?<\/p>\n

\u201cAngel,\u201d Fred said quietly. He hadn\u2019t even heard her approach. \u201cThe nurse just came out. She said that Cordy woke up. She\u2019s still pretty groggy but you can go in and see her if you\u2026\u201d Angel was already halfway down the hall.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

In the doorway outside Cordelia\u2019s room, Angel stopped, taking a deep, though unnecessary breath. She was so pale. He watched as she gingerly sat up in bed. She moved one way and must have pulled at the stitches, releasing a small gasp of pain. Angel unknowingly sucked in air too, mimicking her.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you mind making sure those shades are pulled down all the way,\u201d Cordy asked the nurse who had been making notes on her vitals. Her voice was hoarse\u2014a frightening resemblance to when her visions had caused physical manifestations.<\/p>\n

Noting the woman\u2019s odd look, Cordelia made up an excuse. \u201cI just don\u2019t feel like seeing the sun right now.\u201d The nurse nodded and moved to secure the shades. Cordelia absently picked at the large white bandage affixed to her side.<\/p>\n

\u201cAlso, do you think you could go get one of my friends?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t think that would be a problem,\u201d the nurse answered, smiling. She walked back over and rearranged Cordelia\u2019s blankets. \u201cWhat\u2019s your friend look like?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh he\u2019ll be easy to find. Tall, dark, very hot in that mysterious bad boy kind of way.\u201d<\/p>\n

The nurse looked up and saw Angel in the doorway. \u201cLet me guess? A penchant for black leather?\u201d<\/p>\n

Cordelia\u2019s mouth dropped open. \u201cHow\u2019d you\u2014\u201d she asked before noticing where the nurse was looking. Cordy turned to the door and smiled. \u201cAngel.\u201d Neither of them moved or said anything, and the nurse, who had seen more than her share of day time soap operas, knew that was her cue to leave.<\/p>\n

Even then, Angel still stood just inside the doorway, not quite sure how to proceed.<\/p>\n

\u201cHow are you?\u201d Okay, so it\u2019s not the most original line in the world, especially considering the fact that I had hours to prepare.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019m clearly out of the running for that part of bikini-clad extra on that episode of \u2018VIP\u2019, but other than that, I\u2019m fine. Alive. So I guess I\u2019m doing better than you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s a given.\u201d Of course she\u2019s doing better than me. She didn\u2019t have to watch the person she loves nearly die. She hasn\u2019t spent the last four hours wondering how she would go on living if her reason for living was gone.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cI know I look like hell Angel, but I don\u2019t have cooties. Come over here,\u201d Cordy ordered.<\/p>\n

Angel did as commanded, coming to stand next to her bed. She wasn\u2019t yelling at him and she seemed to have forgotten everything at Caritas but Angel had learned enough about her in the past three years to know that wasn\u2019t true and that they would have to talk about it, soon. But if she didn\u2019t want do deal with it now, he would follow her lead.<\/p>\n

He would follow her anywhere. Before he could stop himself, he reached for her hand and squeezed, brushing his thumb over her pulse point because he needed proof that she was indeed okay. She squeezed his hand back and closed her eyes and it took all 250 years of willpower to not climb into bed and grab her and promise to devote the rest of his eternal life to keeping her safe and happy.<\/p>\n

\u201cAre all those kids from the park okay?\u201d she asked. Angel could only nod. \u201cHow\u2019s everyone else?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFine. Worried about you. I sent everyone but Fred and Gunn home. I tried to get them to go, but even without the Cordettes, you still seem to have one hell of a fan club.\u201d Before she could smile at his barb, Angel continued. \u201cHow did this happen?\u201d<\/p>\n

Suddenly Cordy\u2019s eyes were everywhere, her gaze darting all around the room but avoiding him entirely. \u201cOh you know. It\u2019s not the first time I\u2019ve gotten in the way of a big slimy demon. You look exhausted Broody Boy. The sun\u2019s up, which means you\u2019re up way past bedtime. Better get home before Wesley grounds you.\u201d<\/p>\n

She\u2019s hiding something. Does she really think I won\u2019t notice something\u2019s up? <\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cCor,\u201d Angel said but then he looked at her. Yes, they needed to talk, about how she got hurt and about what happened at the bar and about the fact that somewhere along the line he just might have fallen in love with his best friend. But not right now. She needed to rest. Talking could wait. It would have to.<\/p>\n

So, instead of pressing the issue, he just leaned down and kissed her forehead. \u201cGet some rest,\u201d he murmured.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou too. And Angel,\u201d she called, \u201cgive Connor a smooch for me.\u201d He nodded and slowly walked out the door.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

For the second night in a row, Buffy had been unable to sleep. Of course, she had gotten into bed a little before four in the morning, so calling it night was stretching it. Suddenly, the door to her room opened.<\/p>\n

She reached under her pillow for Mr. Pointy before seeing the light from the hall shining on red hair. Willow. Buffy motioned her closer and gestured to be quiet as to not wake up Dawn. Willow nodded and sat on the bed.<\/p>\n

\u201cFred and Gunn just got in. Cordelia woke up. They said she\u2019s fine\u2026I mean, considering.\u201d<\/p>\n

Buffy only nodded, sitting up with her arms around her knees.<\/p>\n

Good. That\u2019s good. Cordelia\u2019s okay. She\u2019s going to be fine and me and Angel kissed and everything is going to be okay. Except for the fact that Angel looked like he wanted to cry when we first got to the hospital and discounting the fact that the kiss itself hadn\u2019t felt, I don\u2019t know, right.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cBuffy? You came here for Angel, didn\u2019t you? To, what, start up again?\u201d Willow peered into the shadows, trying to discern the expression on Buffy\u2019s face when she failed to answer the question. \u201cI\u2019m going to take that as a yes. So, I\u2019ll skip the part about how there\u2019s still a big curse and now he\u2019s got Connor and you two live in two different places which might as well be two different worlds.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI appreciate you skipping that part,\u201d Buffy said, dryly.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut Buffy, there\u2019s something you need to think about. People, they, they change. They grow\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, there\u2019s nothing wrong with him growing\u2014I happen to think Angel looks good with a few extra pounds on him.\u201d Although actually, I so don\u2019t. Who wants cuddly, who needs hulking size? I\u2019d much rather have someone lean, a body carved out of granite, all bone and sinew and oh dear god stop this right now.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cRegardless,\u201d Willow said, \u201cpeople change physically and EMOTIONALLY. They start to want different things.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAngel and I have always wanted one thing,\u201d Buffy blurted out before remembering that Dawn was sleeping less than five feet away. \u201cTo be together,\u201d she continued in a more quiet voice. For a moment Willow just looked at her and Buffy wondered why it seemed so impossible to look her best friend in the eyes.<\/p>\n

\u201cBuffy. Xander told me. He told me about how Angel was when he saw her get hurt. He said he\u2019s only seen that look once before. That time with the Master.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s your point Willow,\u201d Buffy asked, having a sinking feeling she knew exactly what Will\u2019s point was. \u201cWhat are you trying to say?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m saying,\u201d Willow paused, pursing her lips, wondering how the best way to put this was. \u201cCordelia. I\u2019m talking about Cordelia.\u201d There. It was out in the open.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat? They\u2019re FRIENDS.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you know he jumped into another dimension to save her? Twice? Did you know that she sleeps here sometimes Buffy, and when she sleeps here, do you know where she sleeps?\u201d<\/p>\n

Please don\u2019t say his bed. Please don\u2019t say with him. <\/i>Buffy didn\u2019t give Willow a chance to answer the question. Well, even if that\u2019s true, it has to be totally innocent. Angel does have a soul to worry about. Willow\u2019s just misinterpreting. She\u2019s just confused.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cI get that they\u2019re close Will. But, it\u2019s not like that.\u201d It can\u2019t be like that. That would ruin everything. <\/i>\u201cIt\u2019s like a, a brother\/sister thing. Like you and Xander.\u201d<\/p>\n

Willow had the audacity to snort at that. \u201cI was in love with Xander for years.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, so bad example.\u201d Moving on now. <\/i>\u201cThat doesn\u2019t mean\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n

Willow held up her hand, cutting Buffy off. \u201cI talked to Fred. She told me lots of things, things you would be very interested in hearing. Things you should hear even if you aren\u2019t interested, actually. Cordy was going to die because of those visions. Did you know that?<\/p>\n

She was going to die and she didn\u2019t tell anyone, no one, and she gave up every chance she had of getting rid of them. Does that sound like the Cordelia we know? Or the one we thought we knew?\u201d<\/p>\n

Buffy didn\u2019t know what to make of that information. She couldn\u2019t deal with that now. She couldn\u2019t look at Cordelia in that light. Not now anyway. \u201cSo? She likes playing martyr now\u2014probably figures she can get more attention that way. People can fawn over how perfect she is, like she\u2019s a fucking saint.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow many saints do you know that are half-demon,\u201d Willow asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cWHAT,\u201d Buffy exclaimed, again forgetting about her sleeping sister. Luckily Dawn just mumbled something and turned over.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo she could keep the visions. She let someone make her half demon so she could keep the visions and keep helping Angel. She went demony FOR HIM.\u201d<\/p>\n

Okay. Cordy\u2019s half demon. That\u2019s big. I admit, that\u2019s big. But it doesn\u2019t change anything. <\/i>\u201cFine. I buy that Cordelia\u2019s fallen for Angel. Been there done that. Remember how she used to flirt with him at the Bronze? But so what? It\u2019s one hell of a stretch to say that Angel likes her back. Trust me. I know Angel, I know him better than anyone.\u201d Maybe if I keep saying it, that will be true. <\/i>\u201cHe doesn\u2019t like her. He couldn\u2019t. Not like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou honestly believe that? You believe he only cares about her in a friendly platonic way? Cause, you know, Buffy, you\u2019re MY friend but how often do I straddle you on the floor of a hotel lobby? How often do we make goo-goo eyes at each other across the room?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGoo-goo eyes?\u201d Buffy repeated, hoping to distract Willow.<\/p>\n

Willow wouldn\u2019t be put off track. \u201cYes. They have been big with the making of goo-goo eyes. You would have seen it. If you were letting yourself actually see them together. Because, I think, and I\u2019m pretty sure Xander and Dawn would agree, that since the minute we walked in the door, you\u2019ve only seen what you want to see.\u201d<\/p>\n

That\u2019s completely not true. Does she think I want to see Cordelia playing Mommy to Angel\u2019s child? Does she think I wanted to walk in on Angel sniffing Cordelia\u2019s sweater? Cause, I didn\u2019t want to see any of that. <\/i>Buffy wanted out of this conversation. NOW.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy are you saying all this Willow? What? Are you jealous that Angel and I are together again and I have someone while you\u2026don\u2019t. Are you sure this isn\u2019t all about you and Tara?\u201d Oh god. Why did I say that? I didn\u2019t WANT to see her face look like that again. I made her face look like that. What\u2019s wrong with me? <\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cWill. I, I didn\u2019t mean that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Willow stood up and smoothed out her pajamas. Hurt flared in her eyes, but her voice was calm. \u201cI don\u2019t want to fight with you Buffy. We both need some sleep. I shouldn\u2019t have come here and started this conversation in the middle of the night, or day, or whatever the hell it is. I, I just wanted\u2026\u201d Willow sighed.<\/p>\n

\u201cLet\u2019s talk about it tomorrow, err, today. Uh, I give up.\u201d She walked towards the door than stopped. Not turning around, she added, \u201cThings are different though Buffy. You need to be aware of that.\u201d She left.<\/p>\n

Buffy leaned back on the pillow. Willow would probably pass out if she knew just how different things had gotten. If she knew how scared Buffy was all the time. If she knew how Buffy hadn\u2019t felt right since she came back. If she knew Buffy had slept with Spike, worse, how Buffy had liked sleeping with Spike.<\/p>\n

She\u2019d be sickened. Because I\u2019m disgusting. <\/i><\/p>\n

Everything had gotten so messy, so very\u2026gray. Buffy missed the black and white. She hated the messy. I\u2019m fixing it though. It\u2019s going to get better. <\/i>Buffy shut her eyes and tried not to think about how she had kissed Angel and waited for the fire. How the fire never came. Funny how there was always fire with Spike.<\/p>\n

So much fire she could get lost in the flames.<\/p>\n

Part 19<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

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Part 18: Aftermath Hours later, Angel was staring at a teen pregnancy poster on the wall of the hospital waiting room. He had…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4008","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-completed-fics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4008","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4008"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4008\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4008"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4008"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4008"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}