{"id":3996,"date":"2015-07-05T23:19:18","date_gmt":"2015-07-05T22:19:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/?p=3996"},"modified":"2015-07-06T00:59:22","modified_gmt":"2015-07-05T23:59:22","slug":"bad-timing-14","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/2015\/07\/05\/bad-timing-14\/","title":{"rendered":"Bad Timing. 14"},"content":{"rendered":"

Part 14<\/b>: Memory Lane<\/em><\/p>\n

So the make them jealous plan wasn\u2019t the best idea.<\/i><\/p>\n

<\/i>Cordelia didn\u2019t know why she\u2019d thought it would work. Angel and Buffy hadn\u2019t seemed overcome with jealousy when Cordy and Spike had been on stage.<\/p>\n

There had been no tenseness. Angel had appeared vaguely confused and there was no screaming \u201cGet your hands of my man,\u201d from Buffy. She seemed more concerned with relieving her bladder and Angel looked as if he was more bothered by the singing, rather than Spike and Cordelia singing TOGETHER.<\/p>\n

They\u2019d both run off before the \u201cI\u2019ve Got You Babe\u201d encore. And I do a mean Cher.<\/i><\/p>\n

It hadn\u2019t been a total bust thought. She\u2019d had a blast, everyone in the club had offered to buy the two of them drinks, and when Angel came back from wherever he had been, he sat down in the empty chair next to her, much to Buffy\u2019s chagrin.<\/p>\n

\u201cNext time I complain about that little vacation I took to Hell, remind me of what I just witnessed,\u201d Angel whispered in her ear, as Xander exited the stage, following an agonizing rendition of \u201cBorn in the USA.\u201d<\/p>\n

Cordelia giggled. \u201cSo you\u2019re saying that hundreds of years of unspeakable torture\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs nothing compared to what has to be the most frightening impression of Bruce Springsteen I have ever been forced to listen to,\u201d Angel concluded.<\/p>\n

They both looked up when they noted most of the table was relatively silent. Apparently, vestiges of the initial awkwardness were still hanging around.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo,\u201d Gunn said, hoping to get the conversational ball rolling again, \u201cwhat was Cordelia like at 16? Cause I can guess, and what I\u2019m thinking seems pretty scary.\u201d<\/p>\n

Willow bit her lip, not sure how to proceed, while Xander smirked, Buffy beamed, and Cordelia looked down at the table.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell,\u201d Buffy said with a laugh. \u201cShe was all the things you are thinking. A cheerleader, the May Queen, you know the type.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Cordy,\u201d Fred gushed, \u201cI bet you were so popular!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, she was popular.\u201d It was Xander\u2019s turn now. \u201cShe had a mindless group of followers\u2014The Cordettes. Gunn, you met Harmony, right? Well, imagine a gaggle of them, all worshipping at the alter of Cordelia.\u201d<\/p>\n

Everybody laughed. Willow noticed the uncomfortable look of Cordy\u2019s face and felt the disconcerting need to give her a hand. \u201cShould you really be talking Xander? You spent some time worshipping at the alter of Cordelia too, in a closet I might add.\u201d Everyone, even Cordelia and Xander, laughed at that one.<\/p>\n

\u201cDamn,\u201d Gunn said. \u201cSo y\u2019all managed to have SOME fun on the Hellmouth.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we weren\u2019t out rescuing Cordelia, that is,\u201d Buffy said.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not like Cordelia could deny that. It was true, Buffy had saved her life bunches of times. She would give her props where props were due.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah,\u201d Cordy agreed. \u201cBuffy saved me from unpopular invisible girls, vampires, and all kinds of icky stuff.\u201d<\/p>\n

Buffy wasn\u2019t thrown by Cordelia\u2019s agreement for a second. \u201cThe best was Cordelia with Giles\u2014he was my watcher. He couldn\u2019t STAND her. He was always one step away from strangling her. We could never convince Cordelia that the best way to help was to just go away.\u201d<\/p>\n

No one at the table quite knew what to do with that comment. There were a few uneasy laughs, but it hadn\u2019t seemed very funny.<\/p>\n

Fred decided it was time to change the subject. \u201cWell, Cordy, what about boyfriends? Besides Xander, I mean?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, they had a bad habit of dying. Or being evil. Or being evil and then dying. Little bit of both. Call it the curse of Cordelia,\u201d Cordy said. She was thinking that maybe if she made the jokes herself, Buffy might stop.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, there was Angel,\u201d Buffy said, in a strange voice. Everyone at the table looked shocked and turned to Cordy. \u201cNot that he was her boyfriend, but she sure wanted him to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Oh lord. It\u2019s okay. Laugh it off. Show them just how much of an actress you are. <\/i>\u201cYes, it\u2019s sad but true. I took one look at everyone\u2019s favorite creature of the night, pronounced him salty goodness, and proceeded to try and make him mine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Feeling that surge she always got on when she was on stage, Cordelia continued, turning to Angel. \u201cThat was before I realized that I couldn\u2019t compete with a 200-year-old blond fetish.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAww, that\u2019s so cute,\u201d Fred commented.<\/p>\n

It wasn\u2019t supposed to be cute<\/i> Buffy thought. It\u2019s supposed to embarrass Cordelia. Clearly she just needed to try a little harder.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe made Angel soooo uncomfortable. It was hilarious, with her always throwing herself at him,\u201d Buffy said. \u201cShe couldn\u2019t seem to grasp the concept of rejection,\u201d Buffy stage-whispered to the table at large.<\/p>\n

\u201cI have a lot of trouble imagining anyone rejecting Cordelia. Damn Angel, were you blind or something back then?\u201d Gunn asked.<\/p>\n

Angel shrugged. He knew this was making Cordelia more than a little tense; her heart was pounding so much he could literally see her pulse point jump. At the same time, he liked knowing she once thought he was attractive.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, I didn\u2019t know she liked me. Cordy, you know how bad I am at the whole subtlety thing. When you think someone is salty goodness, you need to tell them they\u2019re salty goodness.\u201d<\/p>\n

Buffy never gave Cordelia a chance to respond. \u201cBack then you would never have imagined Cordelia and Angel would one day be friends. What did we call her that one night, when we were training right before my birthday? Oh yeah, Sporedelia.\u201d Buffy continued on, before Angel could point out only Buffy had called her that. \u201cAngel wasn\u2019t an official member of the \u201cI Hate Cordelia\u201d club though. That was more of a Xander and Willow thing.\u201d<\/p>\n

This time there was no uneasy laughter. Only uneasy silence.<\/p>\n

Fred finally asked, \u201cBut, I thought, I mean, weren\u2019t you all friends?\u201d<\/p>\n

Buffy choked back a laugh. \u201cIs that what she told \u2013\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, yeah,\u201d Willow interrupted. \u201cWe were good friends. Right Xander?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dawn was disgusted. Her sister was acting like such a bitch and all anyone was doing was ignoring it, while Cordelia just sat there, looking miserable. \u201cHey, Cordelia, you and Spike were really great up there. Do you wanna do another song?\u201d<\/p>\n

Cordelia looked at Dawn, her eyes communicating her appreciation. \u201cNo thanks sweetie, but I will go help you pick out a song.\u201d Cordelia was out of her chair before Dawn could say a word.<\/p>\n

Angel felt like he was in Bizarro-land. Which is in itself funny, because if Xander had made that Superman reference a few years ago, I wouldn\u2019t have known what the hell he was talking about.<\/i><\/p>\n

Buffy was turning the night into some kind of battle with Cordelia, which was odd because A, what did they have to fight about, and B, Cordelia didn\u2019t really seem to know they were at war. Where had all those signature cutting remarks been? Where were the cruel one-liners? She was off her game tonight.<\/p>\n

Spike came over and took Cordelia\u2019s chair, knocking Angel out of his reverie. \u201cLook mate, you better tell the Slayer to watch her back. Your man Gunn is looking kinda angry again. He\u2019s protective of the cheerleader.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSpike,\u201d Angel sighed. \u201cThe last thing I need right now is advice from you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFine. But you know, even I\u2019m getting a little pissed at Buffy now. She\u2019s acting like a baby and the silly bint is really getting to Cordy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cCordy?\u201d Angel asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right, poof. I\u2019ve got \u2018Cordy\u2019 rights now too. You play dress-up with a person, you get close. Anyway, my point is, you haven\u2019t said a word. You haven\u2019t told Buffy to shut the fuck up. You haven\u2019t told Cordy that the Slayer is full of shit. It makes it look like you agree.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSpike, you don\u2019t know what the hell you are\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s where you\u2019re wrong, poof. Little Miss May Queen and I, we understand each other. We have a lot more in common than you might think.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I thought it was all opposites attract,\u201d Angel mumbled.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat was that?\u201d Spike asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing. So, tell me, what do you and Cordy have in common. Besides the fact that both of you aren\u2019t natural blonds?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe both are letting Buffy walk all over us,\u201d Spike said, in a quiet firm voice.<\/p>\n

Angel looked at him for a moment. Finally he said, \u201cIt\u2019s not just sex, is it?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou knew?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHello, I\u2019m a vampire. I have super-smell power, just like you.\u201d<\/p>\n

Spike grinned. \u201cCheerleader\u2019s rubbing off on you. You sound just like her.\u201d That got a brief grin out of Angel. \u201cShe\u2019s a piece of work, that one. And Christ, the way she smells.\u201d<\/p>\n

The grin disappeared. \u201cSpike,\u201d Angel growled warningly.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh chill ya big poof. Look, she\u2019s upset and I like her and so you damn well need to fix it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Angel didn\u2019t deny that Cordelia was upset. \u201cHow?\u201d<\/p>\n

Spike was getting a little exasperated now.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know. Tell her she\u2019s beautiful. Shag her against the wall in the bathroom. I don\u2019t care. Just get her smiling again.\u201d<\/p>\n

Part 15<\/a><\/b><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Part 14: Memory Lane So the make them jealous plan wasn\u2019t the best idea. Cordelia didn\u2019t know why she\u2019d thought it would work….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3996","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-completed-fics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3996","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3996"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3996\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3996"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3996"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goteamfiction.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3996"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}