Part 11<\/b><\/p>\n
(Note: This chapter involves BtVS episode “Choices”. I put my own spin on because I like Wesley and because Cordelia is around.<\/i>)<\/p>\n
The closer Cordelia got to the library, the more disheartened she became. Did she really want to trade one Buffy worshipper for another? Angel might be interested now but what happens after he\u2019s cured?<\/p>\n
Buffy will be right back in his life. At least with Xander, being with Buffy wasn\u2019t an option. There was a time she would never have willingly played second fiddle to anyone but Cordelia was a realist. Everyone who mattered to her placed Buffy ahead of her.<\/p>\n
Even Wesley, who didn\u2019t really like Buffy, considered the blond to be his number one priority.<\/p>\n
Would Angel still want her once he could have Buffy again? She doubted it was just a sexual conquest he was after. If it was, he could have accomplished that on her kitchen floor. She believed he valued her friendship and she didn\u2019t doubt he desired her.<\/p>\n
Was that enough though? Giles and Wesley valued her friendship but if they had to choose between Buffy and her, Buffy would win every time. Xander desired her but if Buffy offered herself too him, he\u2019d jump at the chance, as long as she wasn\u2019t under the influence of a spell.<\/p>\n
She had tried coming in between Buffy and Angel before and she\u2019d been left standing, looking like a fool. Granted it had been before she\u2019d gotten to know Angel or even wanted him on more than a superficial level. Still did she want to go through that again? As much as she was loathed to admit, she knew her place. With Xander, she didn\u2019t make waves.<\/p>\n
Being with him wouldn\u2019t cause any rifts. With Angel, she would start a tidal wave of enormous proportions. Battle lines would certainly be drawn and she and Angel would be out. How long would it be before he defected? Once Angel was back at full strength, he and Buffy would fight side by side again.<\/p>\n
There would inevitably be some battle he was needed for and it would be like old times. He\u2019d end up wondering why he\u2019d ever left the much worshipped blond. Buffy would of course take him back, leaving Cordelia with nothing but the backstabbing sheep.<\/p>\n
Cordelia didn\u2019t try to delude herself. She\u2019d seen first hand what happens when you cross Buffy Summers. Everyone kicked Miss Calender to the curb. Giles hadn\u2019t been willing to give his girlfriend a second chance until he\u2019d gotten Buffy\u2019s nod of approval. Angel was considered by all to be Buffy\u2019s rightful property. There would be no second chances given to a boyfriend stealer.<\/p>\n
Did she really want to risk her place in their world on the off chance of finding true happiness with Angel?<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you alright? You\u2019ve been awfully quiet.\u201d Angel avoided looking directly at her. Something about her air made him wary of listening to her thoughts. It was only a matter of time before she came to her senses and realized he couldn\u2019t offer her anything. She could do so much better than a vampire with a soul.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m fine.\u201d<\/p>\n
He could tell by the sound of her voice she was anything but. He caught her hand and pulled her into the nearest classroom.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey!\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel pressed her against the closed door. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong?\u201d<\/p>\n
*This can\u2019t work*<\/i><\/p>\n
He seized her lips, trying to wipe away her negative thoughts. His tongue plunged in the fiery depths. His hands slid down her back to cup her bottom. He gave it a healthy squeeze then pulled her hard against him.<\/p>\n
Her thoughts went spinning away. The only thing she was aware of was Angel. The way he tasted as his tongue tangled with hers. The way he felt as his hips pressed into hers. The way he surrounded her so perfectly, his hands trapping her close. Her lungs burned for air but death by suffocation seemed preferable. Abandoning his lips was unthinkable. Her hands fisted in his hair and kept his lips where they belonged. She whimpered in protest when he broke off his assault.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou need to breathe.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t wanna,\u201d she panted, \u201cneed more kissing.\u201d She tried to drag him back but his lips veered to the right. Her moan of frustration turned to pleasure as he latched onto her neck. One leg hooked around his hip bringing them closer.<\/p>\n
He supported her leg under her knee and rocked against her. \u201cPlease don\u2019t give up on us. Don\u2019t give up on me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t fight fair.\u201d She gave herself another moment to savor the feel of him hard against her before pulling her leg free. She stood as straight as his hold on her allowed. \u201cCordelia Chase is not a sheep or a coward.\u201d She noticed the confusion and fear in his eyes. \u201cI think it\u2019s time I rocked the boat.\u201d<\/p>\n
The radiance of her smile calmed his fears. He tensed when it began to dim.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t think either of us wants to hurt anyone. Which means you and I need to slow down.\u201d Her whole body screamed in protest as her traitorous hands forced him back a step. \u201cWe both have some decisions to make but when I\u2019m kissing you, my brain ceases to work.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat are you saying?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI want to be with you, Angel. You make me happy and you make my toes curl.\u201d She caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers. \u201cI just\u2026it\u2019s pretty much a given that no one will be happy for us. What are you willing to lose?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not willing to lose you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s sweet but it doesn\u2019t answer my question.\u201d She opened the door without turning around. \u201cDon\u2019t kiss me again until you have an answer. Let\u2019s go.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordy, I..\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou have my friendship, Angel. That\u2019s also a given as far as I\u2019m concerned. The rest is still negotiable.\u201d She reached out and squeezed his hand. \u201cWe haven\u2019t made any decisions except I\u2019ve decided not to throw in the towel before I even climb into the ring.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHuh?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGeez. You\u2019re the guy. I\u2019m the one who shouldn\u2019t understand a boxing analogy. I\u2019ll keep it simple. I like you, Angel. I want you in my life and in my bed but I\u2019m scared. You aren\u2019t mine and there\u2019s a part of me that\u2019s telling me to quit now before I get hurt. I\u2019ve decided to tell that voice to shut the hell up. I\u2019m no martyr. I\u2019m keeping my options open. Now let\u2019s go before they send a search party or I throw you down on the floor.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel followed Cordelia down the corridor. He knew she was right. Putting off decisions simply because Buffy wasn\u2019t around wasn\u2019t fair to her or to Buffy. Trying to distance himself from his dilemma by referring to his relationship as an obstacle was counterproductive. He and Buffy would eventually have to talk face to face. Distance would be impossible. He owed it to all of them to be honest.<\/p>\n
He needed to figure out what his answer is. What is he willing to lose?<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Angel and a subdued Cordelia entered the library.<\/p>\n
\u201cSorry we\u2019re late. I hope you didn\u2019t solve the ascension without us.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat would be a tragedy. I would never be so insensitive as to do something like that.\u201d Giles shot her a mock glare. \u201cWe do have some good news for you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCool. What is it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Giles glanced in Angel\u2019s direction. \u201cWe\u2019ve discovered a cure.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia felt her stomach drop. She managed to figure out she wanted to fight for Angel a minute before she lost her chance with him. \u201cThat\u2019s great.\u201d<\/p>\n
Oz studied the pair. He leaned closer to Willow and whispered, \u201cIs it me or do they seem to be lacking the joy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not you. Buffy will be so happy. I hope she gets here soon.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat does the cure entail? In my experiences, magic always comes with a price.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt isn\u2019t\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHey guys, I just\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThey found the cure, Buffy!\u201d The redhead smiled happily at her best friend.<\/p>\n
\u201cReally?\u201d She received a room full of nods. \u201cI knew you\u2019d do it, Giles.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cActually it was Wesley who discovered it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Buffy smiled at her new watcher before turning back to her real watcher.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was just about to tell Angel more about the cure. We are going to need the demon that got away. I won\u2019t go into details but we will need\u2026some ingredients that only this demon can provide in order to make the potion.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYuck\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cVery. Now on your patrol tonight, you\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHold that thought Giles.\u201d *Is the ascension really that important? Dammit! I want my boyfriend back. It’s not fair!*<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cI spotted Faith carrying a box into the Mayor\u2019s office. I questioned one of his vampire lackeys. It\u2019s called the Box of Gavrok and it\u2019s important to the Mayor\u2019s ascension. That was all I managed to get before I was forced to introduce the vamp to Mr. Pointy. As much as I want Angel cured, it\u2019s going to have to wait a little longer. We need to find out more about this box before I go in and steal it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOf course, I have a text on mystical boxes. I\u2019ll start researching immediately.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll get a copy of the layout for the Mayor\u2019s office.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll help Willow.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBuffy and I will do a little recon and find out where they\u2019re keeping it.\u201d Xander went into the cage and grabbed a crossbow.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think you are all forgetting who is in charge here. I should be the one to accompany Buffy.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks Wes but Xander is good with the strategy making.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYup I was Army guy. Let\u2019s go Buffy.\u201d The pair left before Wesley could protest again.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell I guess we\u2019ll stand around and do nothing.\u201d Cordelia glanced around the library. Only she, Angel and Wesley remained.<\/p>\n
*My father said I would fail as a watcher.*<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cI guess Cordelia was right about you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI beg your pardon.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMy cure. She said you were the right man for the job and she was right.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI am glad I could be of service. I should check to see if Mr. Giles requires my assistance.\u201d The young watcher offered a sincere smile before he walked into the office.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you want me to move out?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAfter I\u2019m cured, would you like me to move out?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you want to?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo but you said we needed to slow things down. I thought..\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cFaith is still after you and you\u2019re not back to full strength yet. You can\u2019t go back to the mansion.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI already feel stronger. I think you were right about my needing rest to recover. After only a couple of nights with you in my arms, I feel rested. I feel whole.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAs far as I\u2019m concerned, you\u2019re welcome to stay with me until my parents return. I\u2019d let you stay longer but I doubt Daddy would approve. You don\u2019t have a stock portfolio or even a source of income as far as I know.\u201d She stepped closer. \u201cI like having you close. I said I wanted to slow down, not stop. Unless you want\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo. I want to stay with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBuffy will probably have something to say about it. She won\u2019t be avoiding you anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cProbably but I intend to stay with you until you kick me out.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood answer.\u201d<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s in the conference room on the top floor. Buffy will enter through the skylight here.\u201d Xander pointed on the map.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019ll probably be magicks protecting it so I\u2019ll be on the roof with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWesley and I will be in the van out front in case a diversionary tactic is needed.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cRight. Do we know what we\u2019re going to do with the box once we have it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Giles nodded at Buffy. \u201cWe destroy it. The \u201cBreath of the Entropics\u201d should do the trick.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve written down the ingredients and some directions. Oz, you can go to the magic shop. They know you\u2019re my boyfriend so just put it on my account. You, Cordy and Angel can get the spell ready for our return.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOK\u201d<\/p>\n
Xander watched Cordelia and Angel, standing shoulder to shoulder, nod in unison. \u201cI think Cordy should come with us.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI have to stay on the roof with you. Which means Willow will have to get back to the van by herself. She and Cordy can watch each other\u2019s backs.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCordelia?\u201d *She’s so useless*<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cYes\u201d Xander walked around the table and pulled Cordelia close. \u201cAre you up for it, sweetie?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI..\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMaybe I should go instead of Xander. I might not be back to normal but I\u2019m still stronger than him. Xander and Oz can work the spell.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMr\u2026Angel has a valid point but it would be better if Xander and Angel both went. Cordelia and Oz can manage the spell.\u201d<\/p>\n
Xander nodded. It wasn\u2019t exactly what he wanted but he was sick of his girlfriend spending so much time with the vampire. *He already has Buffy. He could at least let me have Cordy.*<\/i><\/p>\n
Angel wanted to growl at the obnoxious boy\u2019s thoughts. He didn\u2019t deserve Cordelia. \u201cThat\u2019s fine with me.\u201d As long as Cordy is safe, he silently added.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo. Angel stays here. He\u2019s dealt with magic before. Dating Willow doesn\u2019t make Oz an expert. No offense.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNone taken.\u201d<\/p>\n
Buffy returned his nod. \u201cCordelia can come with us. She and Willow will be fine. They\u2019ll be gone before I go in. Xander is my strategy guy. I don\u2019t need him for strength. No offense, Xan.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cS\u2019okay. With that pulley system, I think I can handle all 95 pounds of the lean mean slayin\u2019 machine.\u201d<\/p>\n
She winked. \u201cOK. Does everybody know what they\u2019re doing?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBuffy, I..\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, I\u2019ll be fine. Don\u2019t worry about me.\u201d *He\u2019ll be cured soon and then we can fight side by side again.*<\/i> \u201cWe\u2019ll be back soon. Keep the home fires burning for us.\u201d Buffy looked over at Willow and Oz who were kissing for luck. *Why can\u2019t I have something like that? \u2018Cuz I\u2019m the slayer, that\u2019s why.*<\/i> \u201cLet\u2019s go.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel glared at Xander who was holding Cordelia\u2019s hand and practically dragging her behind him as he panted after Buffy.<\/p>\n
*I\u2019ll be fine, Spacey. Don\u2019t make waves. It\u2019s not the right time.*<\/i> She managed a small smile before she left with the others.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m heading out to the magic shop. I\u2019ll be back.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll be here.\u201d Angel scanned the library. \u201cAlone.\u201d<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
\u201cOh yeah. I\u2019m a badass Wicca.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOK Willow. Get gone and be safe.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe will.\u201d Cordelia shot a glare at Buffy.<\/p>\n
\u201cBe careful Cordy. I\u2019ll see you back at the library.\u201d<\/p>\n
He pulled her close and kissed her before she could protest. \u201cOK. You two be careful.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe will.\u201d He slapped her butt as she turned to leave.<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
\u201cHow could you let this happen?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMe?\u201d Buffy stared at Angel in disbelief. \u201cThey were supposed to go back to the van. No one knew we were there yet. They should have been safe.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo one is suggesting you are to blame.\u201d Giles glared at the irate vampire. \u201cI\u2019m sorry, Buffy. We assumed they remained with you.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDammit!\u201d *I should have never let Cordelia go without me. I could have protected her.*<\/p>\n
\u201cWe go back. Full on assault.\u201d *I can\u2019t lose Willow. I didn\u2019t even say good luck to her. I only talked to Cordy. I was so stupid! How was Cordy going to keep my Willow safe?*<\/i><\/p>\n
Angel didn\u2019t hold back his growl this time. Xander was the one who insisted Cordy go in the first place.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019ll be killed if we go rushing in there.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo we just leave them there Giles? Is that what you\u2019re saying? I\u2019ll go by myself if I have to.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, we need to come up with a plan.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI..\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know what\u2019s at stake. My best friend is in there!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDammit so is mine!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d Buffy shook her head in confusion. \u201cSince when are you and Willow best friends?\u201d<\/p>\n
He clenched his hands into fists, fighting the urge to hit someone. \u201cI\u2019m talking about Cordelia.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh.\u201d *I can\u2019t deal with that right now.*<\/i> Her eyes rested on the box. \u201cWe trade, the box for Willow and Cordelia.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat box is our best shot at stopping the Mayor.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019re talking about Willow\u2026and Cordelia, Wesley. We\u2019ll stop the Mayor another way.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf he ascends, the world will be in peril. Your families, your friends will\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you even human?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou wanted to take the fight to the Mayor and we have.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel crossed the room in a flash. He spoke in low tones so only Wesley could hear. \u201cCordelia is your friend. She reached out to you when no one else did.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere is too much at risk. I will not fail in my duty.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShe\u2019s in there with Faith. You didn\u2019t hear her thoughts. I know what she planned to do to Cordy that night in the mansion. Can you live with yourself if you let this happen, if you let Faith hurt her like that? I know you must have learned about torture to become a watcher. Cordelia needs our help.\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley removed his glasses. \u201cBloody hell!\u201d The Englishman spun around and hit the stand sending the pot crashing to the floor. \u201cMake the call Mr. Giles.\u201d<\/p>\n
Everyone stood frozen in shock for a moment.<\/p>\n
\u201cMr. Giles?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes of course. I\u2019m on it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel glanced around the room.<\/p>\n
Buffy collapsed into a chair at the table. *This is all my fault. I can\u2019t lose Willow.*<\/i><\/p>\n
Xander paced the length of the floor by the stacks. *Please be okay Will. Please be okay.*<\/i><\/p>\n
Oz sat down on the stairs with his face buried in his hands. *She\u2019ll be okay. I know she will. They\u2019ll both be fine.*<\/i><\/p>\n
Wesley leaned against the counter. *My father never had a friend in his life. He\u2019ll never understand. I did the right thing. I did. I know I did. I hope I did the right thing.*<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cThey\u2019ll be here at midnight for the exchange. *They\u2019ll both be fine. They have to be. I don\u2019t think Buffy could handle losing Willow. I need to be strong for Buffy right now.*<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cI need some air. I\u2019ll be back.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re a vampire.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cShut up Xander. I think you\u2019ve done enough talking today.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s that supposed to mean?\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel ignored him and headed for the exit door in the stacks but Xander stepped in his way. \u201cMove.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI want to know what you meant by that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMove boy.\u201d He didn\u2019t budge. \u201cIf you make me say it again, you\u2019ll have about five seconds to regret it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Buffy grabbed Angel\u2019s shoulder. \u201cCalm down. We\u2019re all worried about them.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou don\u2019t have to tell me. I\u2019ve already heard your concerns. I\u2019ll be back in time to prepare for their arrival.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t do anything stupid.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll wait for the exchange but if..\u201d He rolled his shoulders in an effort to relax. It didn\u2019t work. He grabbed Xander by the throat and shoved him aside. The boy went crashing into the chairs. \u201cNext time get out of my way.\u201d He stormed off without another word.<\/p>\n
\u201cSoul or no soul, he\u2019s still a bastard!\u201d<\/p>\n
***<\/p>\n
Cordelia slowly drifted into consciousness. Her head felt like it had been run over by a truck. Repeatedly. She forced her eyes to open.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s about time Queenie. I thought you were never gonna wake up. You and me have a little unfinished business.\u201d<\/p>\n
Cordelia tried to turn her head to look around. The attempt made her nauseous.<\/p>\n
\u201cIf you\u2019re looking for Willow, she\u2019s stuffed in a storage room. I thought you\u2019d appreciate some privacy for what I have planned.\u201d<\/p>\n
*Angel, help me*<\/p>\n