Part 53<\/b><\/p>\n
Angel stared at his son, his mouth suddenly dry and his mind without words. There was so much to say to Connor just five minutes ago, but when faced with his actual presence, Angel lost everything like sand falling through a sieve. All he could do was stand there, his muscles tightened with nervousness, and drink in the sight of Connor.<\/p>\n
He looked okay, if physical appearances were any indication. Angel could find no bruises marring Connor\u2019s skin, no cuts or scrapes alerting him to Connor\u2019s blood. Just about to finally relax and go with the assumption that Connor was okay, Angel met his son\u2019s eyes. In that instant, everything changed.<\/p>\n
Connor\u2019s eyes were emotionless.<\/p>\n
It was as if the sunlight in the young man he\u2019d met a few days ago had been completely eclipsed by the darkness of Connor\u2019s old persona. There were ghosts in his eyes, haunting, heavy ghosts that visibly weighed Connor down. He blinked stoically at Angel, his arms crossed over his chest as he stared his father down. There was a flash of softness there for a moment, an almost-smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth, and then it was gone like the sun disappearing behind stormy clouds.<\/p>\n
The fa\u00e7ade Connor presented at that very moment was one he should\u2019ve had only for Jace and Eve. He was here with his father, with Cordy. With people he could trust and relax around. And yet there was a mistrust about him, a wariness that clung to him.<\/p>\n
Spike\u2019s words from last night suddenly rushed back to haunt Angel: \u201cI think they\u2019re getting to him.\u201d<\/p>\n
Instantly agitated, Angel crossed his arms over his chest, clenching his hands into fists. It scared him, the apathy in his son\u2019s gaze. The abject surrender to his circumstances. Connor\u2019s whole demeanor reminded Angel of a spirited animal that had been broken and was being molded into its trainer\u2019s ideal killer.<\/p>\n
Eve\u2019s ideal killer.<\/p>\n
Angel\u2019s face darkened as these thoughts ran through his mind. He straightened, his jaw tightening in determination. Jace and Eve were messing with Conno\u2019rs head, and that was unacceptable. No one was going to steal his son from him again. Not if he had anything to say about it.<\/p>\n
A small hand gripped Angel\u2019s arm and he relaxed slightly. Looking down into Cordelia\u2019s concerned face, Angel tried to wipe the fury from his eyes and push the negativity away. He must\u2019ve been somewhat successful, because Cordy gave him a small smile and turned to the young man across from them.<\/p>\n
\u201cHi, Connor,\u201d she said softly, a smile on her face. \u201cWe\u2019ve missed you.\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor just stared at her for a moment, then nodded almost imperceptibly. \u201cI don\u2019t have much time. Jace wanted to stop by later tonight and spend some \u2018quality time\u2019 together, whatever the hell that means.\u201d<\/p>\n
Spike snorted indelicately on Cordy\u2019s other side, lighting up his cigarette and leaning against a post in the dim warehouse where they were meeting. \u201cSo what does the evil bitch have planned?\u201d<\/p>\n
A shrug was his only answer at first. \u201cI told you before that she had someone to break through your security at Wolfram & Hart. She plans to have her sorcerer cast his spells tomorrow night on the full moon. She\u2019ll want to strike sometime right after, but she hasn\u2019t said yet. I think she\u2019ll want to do it soon, though. Like in a couple of days.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel finally spoke, his deep voice echoing in the large space. \u201cSo she\u2019s just going to get rid of our perimeter defenses and march into my office?\u201d<\/p>\n
The bottomless eyes of his son stared unblinkingly back into his. \u201cShe wants the three of us to come into your office, weapons out, and for me to subdue you. She says she has a sword of some kind that neutralizes vampires, kind of like a poison.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWes should know where to look,\u201d Cordy said, the tremor in her voice indicating her worry.<\/p>\n
Angel only nodded. \u201cOkay, so we\u2019ll figure out how to counteract the weapon. Do you know what it\u2019s supposed to do? If it has a name?\u201d<\/p>\n
Suddenly, Connor had the uneasy feeling that he\u2019d shared too much. He recoiled at the idea that he\u2019d given his father key information about their attack, and that very reaction confused him even more. He wanted his father dead. Yet he didn\u2019t. His head ached with the conflict tearing through him.<\/p>\n
The sword was called the Blade of Nefyra, an ancient weapon that had been infused with mystical power. It was supposed to affect the blood of a vampire, increasing sensitivity to pain and preventing feeding of any kind. It also caused almost complete immobility, but not paralysis. The vampire couldn\u2019t move but could feel even the barest of sensations.<\/p>\n
While thinking, Connor had stared at Angel for so long that everyone thought he wouldn\u2019t answer. Finally he shrugged. \u201cI don\u2019t know any more.\u201d<\/p>\n
That wasn\u2019t true, but it made Connor feel better. At least he\u2019d managed to keep one secret.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019ll be ready anyway,\u201d Angel said.<\/p>\n
\u201cMaybe we shouldn\u2019t even do this at all,\u201d Spike said, standing away from the column and dropping his cigarette butt to the floor, grinding it beneath his heels.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you mean? We can\u2019t just let her get away with this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, that\u2019s not what I meant.\u201d Spike looked away and wouldn\u2019t meet Angel\u2019s eyes. \u201cMaybe you should just do what you did with Lindsay. Get the Senior Partners to suck her up and deal with her themselves.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel shook his head stubbornly, his face a hard mask. \u201cNo. The partners can\u2019t be trusted to get rid of her. She\u2019ll find someway to escape and then we\u2019ll have to deal with this all over again. I want Connor to be away from her and safe.\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor stood up from the wall he\u2019d been slouching against. \u201cIf that\u2019s it, I should go.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThere\u2019s nothing else you need to tell us?\u201d Cordy asked softly, reaching out to touch his arm.<\/p>\n
He shrugged away from her as if uncomfortable with her nearness. \u201cNo. I told you everything I know already. And I don\u2019t know what day, exactly, so there\u2019s not much else to say.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, then,\u201d she answered, feeling awkward. \u201cWe love you, Connor. Be safe.\u201d<\/p>\n
He just nodded, stealing a quick glance at Angel\u2019s closed expression before darting out the door and into the night.<\/p>\n
Cordy sighed into the darkness when he left. \u201cI\u2019m worried about him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou should be,\u201d Spike said, frowning. \u201cSomething\u2019s changed in him. The kid I saw crying into his pillow a couple of nights ago wasn\u2019t in this warehouse just now. That was somebody else.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel stared off into the doorway where Connor had disappeared moments before. \u201cThat was the old Connor,\u201d he said emotionlessly.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot all of him.\u201d Cordy tried to argue. \u201cHe\u2019s not going to betray you, Angel. I know it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel didn\u2019t answer her, nor did he meet her eyes. All he would do was turn and walk out into the night, a silent, troubled warrior who knew that there was a good chance his only child would turn him to dust.<\/p>\n
Part 54<\/b><\/p>\n
Eve paced the dimly lit interior of Connor\u2019s apartment living room. Agitation radiated off her like heat waves, rippling and melting anything that got too close. Jace stood off to the side, his mouth set in a grim line, arms crossed over his powerful chest as he leaned far away from her against the wall.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ll kill the little prick,\u201d Eve hissed, her fists clenching at her sides as she stopped in the middle of the room, shaking in her anger. \u201cI knew we couldn\u2019t trust him. I knew it!\u201d<\/p>\n
Jace frowned at the intensity of her fury. \u201cBaby, we don\u2019t know for sure what\u2019s going on. Maybe we should let him explain. Besides, we need him, remember?\u201d<\/p>\n
Whirling around to face him, Eve\u2019s eyes flashed fire. \u201cHe was seen with Angel, Jace. Angel! How the hell Connor knows about him, I don\u2019t know, but he\u2019s screwing us over. I can feel it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Jace just shook his head. \u201cRelax, Eve. You\u2019ll hurt yourself. And we need him. I don\u2019t think we can do this without him.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHello!\u201d she screeched, throwing her hands up in exasperation, turning away from him and stalking across the room. \u201cI have you. Super guy, remember? Now that you\u2019ve got the blood of a vampire in your veins, you can kick Angel\u2019s ass if you have to.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThen why did you get Connor in the first place?\u201d<\/p>\n
Eve looked at him like he\u2019d sprouted another head. \u201cThis is Angel\u2019s son, Jace. Don\u2019t you get it?\u201d Her eyes turned misty, her voice dropping to an impassioned whisper. \u201cI can just imagine it. Connor with the dagger at Angel\u2019s throat, stabbing him. Then when he can\u2019t move, Connor taunts him and dusts him.\u201d<\/p>\n
The feral gleam in her eyes sent a cold chill up Jace\u2019s spine.<\/p>\n
Whirling around, she faced Jace. \u201cIt\u2019s the perfect revenge. Angel killed by the one person he most wants to love him. That\u2019s why I need him, smartass. But now, everything is all screwed up. He\u2019s a traitor!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not talking about me, are you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor\u2019s voice made Eve jump, stumbling as she tried to right herself. Her eyes narrowed as she looked him up and down, scanning his frame as if she expected him to whip out a machine gun and kill her on the spot.<\/p>\n
She pointed to an armchair nearby. \u201cSit!\u201d<\/p>\n
A frown greeted her as Connor made no move to follow her order.<\/p>\n
\u201cSit!\u201d she screeched, the storm clouds brewing on her face making Connor jump, then do as she asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cJeez,\u201d he said sullenly. \u201cWhat the hell is this, the Inquisition? Who put a swarm of bees in your panties?\u201d<\/p>\n
Tremors wracked Eve\u2019s frame, the fury making her face red. \u201cShut up, you little brat. We saw you tonight. We saw you with HIM!\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor stared her down. \u201cSo?\u201d he said, slouching back in the chair, taking up the perfect image of a defiant teenager. \u201cWho gives a shit? It\u2019s not like I told him anything. Or like I had a choice.\u201d<\/p>\n
Eve strode over to him, bent over, and placed her face level with his, her nose inches from Connor\u2019s. \u201cListen, Connor, and listen good. Your worthless life belongs to me, do you hear? You would still be sniveling over your parents sad little deaths if it weren\u2019t for me and Jace. You owe me an explanation.\u201d She straightened up, crossing her arms over her small frame. \u201cAnd if I don\u2019t get one I like, well, I\u2019ll just have to pay a little visit to your sister and tell her how concerned<\/i> I am for you.\u201d<\/p>\n
At her threat, Connor shot up out of his seat like it had been set on fire. \u201cLeave my family alone, Eve. They have nothing to do with this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThen tell me what the fuck happened with Angel!\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor stared her down for a minute more, finally slouching back down into the chair. He sighed, running his hands over his face. \u201cI didn\u2019t want to tell you because you\u2019d freak, and I didn\u2019t think you\u2019d trust me anymore. You\u2019d think they got to me.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n
His eyes finally met hers, then flicked over to Jace for the merest of seconds before returning to Eve\u2019s. \u201cI didn\u2019t go to the nature conservatory to meditate when I was gone. Angel abducted me from my apartment and tried to convince me to go back with him. He told me he was my father, and he gave me my memories back.\u201d<\/p>\n
Eve\u2019s face turned deathly white as she sank down into another chair, suddenly breathless. \u201cYou remember.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah,\u201d Connor said, his voice full of anger. \u201cI remember everything. I remember how Angel tried to hurt me. How he took Holtz away from me. How he tried to make me believe he loved me and he took away everything that mattered to me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Eyes searching him intently, Eve was silent for a moment. \u201cHow do you feel about him?\u201d<\/p>\n
A glassy look came over Connor\u2019s eyes and he stared off into space, as if lost in his thoughts. \u201cYou know, for a few days there, I thought he might actually love me. That maybe the person I used to be before was just screwed up and misled. That maybe I should love him.\u201d He paused, a sneer curling his lip. \u201cBut that\u2019s a load of shit. He doesn\u2019t love me. He lied to me. Changed my entire freakin\u2019 life because he couldn\u2019t handle me anymore. Because I wasn\u2019t good enough for him.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo how do I feel about him? Screw him. He can go to hell.\u201d His angry eyes finally met Eve\u2019s again. \u201cFuck it, I\u2019ll send him there.\u201d<\/p>\n
Eve stared for a few moments as if she didn\u2019t think she really believed him. Then, seeming to make a decision, she stood again, walking over next to Jace, whose expression hadn\u2019t changed throughout Connor\u2019s revelations.<\/p>\n
\u201cFine. Good. Just so long as we\u2019re clear. If you screw me over, your family will see the end of my knife.\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor nodded curtly. \u201cI get it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo,\u201d Eve said, a bright, false smile on her face as she pulled a folding chair up next to his. \u201cLet\u2019s talk about what exactly you told them to get them off your ass.\u201d<\/p>\n
Part 55<\/b><\/p>\n
Jace watched with mixed emotions as Connor sharpened the mystical weapon they\u2019d be using against Angel. Pride pulled at him, pride at what Connor had accomplished so quickly in his young life. He was ready to take on anything that stood in his path, and Jace felt a sense of fatherly satisfaction that he\u2019d had a hand in Connor\u2019s training.<\/p>\n
This emotion was a double-edged sword, however. Sorrow pushed at him with equal pressure, making him feel as though he were torn in two. He felt guilt for guiding Connor into the person he\u2019d become, knowing that he was setting him up for an emotional and psychological destruction. He\u2019d assuaged his guilt by showing Connor kindness, but that hadn\u2019t stretched very far. He loved Eve, and he\u2019d done everything within his power to see that she would be happy, including insuring the destruction of the only son he\u2019d ever known. He\u2019d changed his life, turned it upside down and inside out for her, but now, on the eve of his first battle under her banner, he questioned his loyalties.<\/p>\n
A shudder broke through him as the Blade of Nefyra glinted in the overhead lighting. That weapon was as disastrous to him as it was to any vampire, thanks to the borrowed blood that now flowed through his veins. He had some advantages over vampires. He could walk in sunlight, could stand the sight of crosses, could avoid feeding, but when push came to shove, he died in the same way they did. Stakes and beheading would do him in, and there would be no casket when his time came, only an urn for his ashes. All it would take would be one careless slip of that blade and he\u2019d be paralyzed, helpless to any enemy who wanted his head.<\/p>\n
The thought made him shudder again, fear coursing through him at the idea of a death so utterly painful.<\/p>\n
At that moment, Connor raised his eyes and met Jace\u2019s, his gaze unflinching. He\u2019d finished cleaning the weapon, sheathing it in the scabbard belted to his waist. Now, he rubbed the handle absently with his fingers and suddenly, Jace felt that Connor could see right through him. Could see the doubts in his eyes, could see the indecision that hovered around him.<\/p>\n
In contrast, staring into Connor\u2019s eyes was like looking at a brick wall. He gave away nothing. Absolutely nothing. Jace had no way of knowing if Connor was sympathetic or ambivalent to his current struggle. It was that mistrust that led Jace to look away, his jaw tensing as he stood upright, leaning away from the wall.<\/p>\n
His chin up, Jace walked over to Connor and stood in front of him, arms crossed over his chest. \u201cYou ready, kid?\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor watched him silently for a moment. Finally, nodded swiftly. \u201cYup. I\u2019m ready to kick ass, old man.\u201d<\/p>\n
It was those words, the nickname Connor had given him in affection, that cut him deeper than any knife ever could. With one last surge of regret flowing through his being, Jace straightened his shoulders and closed himself off from the pain. He\u2019d already made his choice when he\u2019d agreed to the blood ritual. He\u2019d reinforced it when he manipulated Connor, confusing his feelings. By this point, any concerns about Connor\u2019s welfare were irrelevant.<\/p>\n
Jace jerked himself out of his self-reflection long enough to nod tersely. \u201cGood. Just stay the hell away from me with that thing.\u201d He pointed at the Blade of Nefyra at Connor\u2019s waist, then turned and walked swiftly away.<\/p>\n
As he left, Jace struggled to tamp down the volatile emotions that threatened to break through. He kept shoving them down, locking them away, but one residual thought remained, one that wouldn\u2019t be eradicated despite his efforts. When it came right down to it, Jace had the uncanny sense that he wouldn\u2019t make it out of this alive.<\/p>\n
Part 56<\/b><\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m afraid I have some bad news.\u201d<\/p>\n
If his words hadn\u2019t said it, the tone of Wesley\u2019s voice would\u2019ve delivered his message anyway. Accompanying it was a grim look, one that made Angel wonder who\u2019d died.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat is it?\u201d Angel sat back in his desk chair, his hands gripping the armrests as if they\u2019d give him an extra measure of stability. How he wished for Cordy\u2019s strong presence beside him right now, but she was upstairs, getting some much needed sleep.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019ve researched weapons that could cause a vampire\u2019s paralysis, just as you mentioned. There are only two in all of the historical and mythical records that Wolfram & Hart contains.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel knew that if Wolfram & Hart didn\u2019t have it, it probably didn\u2019t exist. \u201cGo on.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOne weapon is a short sword, called El Matado de los Muertos, or Killer of the Dead.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIs there any defense against it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley pursed his lips in contemplation. \u201cI doubt this is the weapon you\u2019ll be facing, Angel. It was lost in the Spanish Armada. Went down with the flagship, which, by the way, has never been fully recovered. Although I don\u2019t know why the Spaniards would\u2019ve needed an anti-vampire weapon to invade the British. Anyway, it is highly unlikely that it would be in anyone\u2019s hands.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, but if it is?\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley shook his head. \u201cThere is an antidote, but only if the weapon is recovered as well. But as I said, I don\u2019t think it will be the weapon Eve will use.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cFine,\u201d Angel sighed, running his fingers through his hair. \u201cWhat\u2019s the other one?\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley\u2019s eyes turned grimmer. \u201cThat\u2019s the one I\u2019m worried about. It\u2019s called the Blade of Nefyra. An ancient weapon, origins unknown. It\u2019s power is mystical, and as far as I can tell, there is no defense against it. None.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel stared into Wesley\u2019s eyes for just a moment, and then nodded his head swiftly.<\/p>\n
\u201cI understand.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI can keep looking if you want, I might have missed something, but\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo.\u201d Standing, Angel walked around the desk and placed a hand on Wesley\u2019s shoulder.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou did well, Wes. I\u2019ve known from the beginning that this would be between me and Connor, and that it might come down to my death. I\u2019m ready to accept it. He\u2019s my son, and I love him. But he might kill me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel paused, looking over Wesley\u2019s shoulder. \u201cRight, Connor?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re right. I might.\u201d<\/p>\n
Wesley\u2019s head whipped around so fast his neck ached. Quickly, he backed out of the way, around Angel\u2019s desk. The look in Angel\u2019s eyes was indiscernible as he faced his son and attackers.<\/p>\n
Connor, flanked by Eve and Jace, strode quickly across the room and stood before his father. The glint in his eyes was feral, angry, and intense. In his left hand was a crossbow, aimed right at Wesley\u2019s midsection. The other held Eve\u2019s secret weapon, light glinting off the curving blade, a scimitar with an ornately carved handle. The pointed end was at Angel\u2019s throat in a matter of seconds, a hair\u2019s breadth away from his skin.<\/p>\n
A stoic expression covered Angel\u2019s face as his eyes bored into his son\u2019s. He couldn\u2019t read Connor, and it scared him. The barriers in Connor\u2019s eyes were up in full force, and try as he might, he couldn\u2019t burrow deep enough to discover where his son\u2019s loyalties lay.<\/p>\n
Behind Connor, Eve smirked triumphantly. \u201cThought you were ready for this, didn\u2019t you, Angel?\u201d<\/p>\n
He didn\u2019t answer, only continued looking into Connor\u2019s unflinching gaze.<\/p>\n
After a moment of tense silence, Angel finally spoke. \u201cConnor, you don\u2019t have to do this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, yes, I do.\u201d Connor\u2019s voice was flat. As emotionless as his eyes. \u201cAnd you want to know why?\u201d He pressed the blade into Angel\u2019s neck, nicking him slightly. Angel felt a slight tingle of power in that cut, enough to know that he\u2019d be in deep trouble if Connor actually stabbed him with it.<\/p>\n
Connor was still talking. \u201cI have to do this because you\u2019re a liar, Dad. A fucking liar!\u201d<\/p>\n
The moment Connor called him Dad, Angel\u2019s eyes whipped frantically over to Eve and Jace\u2019s faces. His heart sank like a stone when he realized that they already knew what Connor knew. That could only mean one of two things: either Connor went back to their side, or his cover got blown.<\/p>\n
Connor\u2019s next words did nothing to relieve Angel\u2019s fears.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou take me from the only security I know and you force these psycho thoughts back into my head, trying to tell me its good for me. You say you love me. You say that you want me to be happy. Well bullshit!\u201d<\/p>\n
By this point, Connor was yelling. His breathing was heavy, his face flushed as his eyes flashed fire. Wesley shifted slightly in the background, trying to get out of Connor\u2019s line of fire, but Connor just cocked the crossbow\u2019s firing mechanism and shook his head. Wesley moved back into place.<\/p>\n
He turned his attention back to Angel. \u201cIt\u2019s all bullshit, Dad,\u201d he said, making the name sound like an insult. Angel flinched at the inflection, Connor\u2019s tone of voice cutting him sharper than any knife ever could. \u201cYou lied to me when I came back from Quortoth. You lied to me when you said you loved me and then erased my entire memory. You lied to me when you put me with a family that wasn\u2019t mine. And you lied to me when you took me back and said that you didn\u2019t want to lose me again.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angel jumped in when Connor took a breath. \u201cConnor, I\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m so sorry that I can\u2019t begin to apologize for it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor laughed dryly. \u201cGood try, Dad, but I can\u2019t trust anything you say. You ruined my life and you deserve to pay for it.\u201d By this time, Connor\u2019s voice had flattened to a monotone, as if he were repeating words he\u2019d memorized. Angel saw something flicker in the depths of his eyes. For a moment, it looked like sorrow, but it was gone so quickly that Angel couldn\u2019t identify it.<\/p>\n
Eve smirked in the background, enjoying the emotional fireworks.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo how does it feel, knowing that your baby boy is going to kill you?\u201d She walked up behind Connor, her well-manicured hand reaching up to curl around the back of Connor\u2019s neck. Scratching through his hair lightly, almost affectionately, her blood-red nails ruffled his hair. She took in the death grip Connor had on the handle of the weapon and squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.<\/p>\n
\u201cDon\u2019t get too carried away, kiddo. I still have great plans for him.\u201d<\/p>\n
Connor turned to look at her, fire still flickering in his eyes. \u201cSo do I.\u201d<\/p>\n
What happened next came so fast that if it weren\u2019t for the carnage, Wesley might\u2019ve questioned whether it happened. In one fluid motion, Connor whipped the crossbow into Eve\u2019s stomach, fired, and threw the blade of Nefyra across the room, burying it into Jace\u2019s gut. Eve staggered back, the arrow piercing deep, her life waning even as she stared in disbelief into the flashing eyes of her betrayer.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo!\u201d she cried weakly as Connor strode across the room, yanked the scimitar out of Jace\u2019s chest and gripped it tightly with both hands.<\/p>\n
He looked down at Jace, noting the sorrow in the older man\u2019s eyes. His borrowed blood was going to kill him after all. He lay motionless, barely able to breathe in the sudden paralysis. \u201cYou didn\u2019t have to come today, Jace,\u201d Connor said softly. \u201cI thought you were going to back out, but then\u2014\u201d he stopped and shook his head sadly.<\/p>\n
\u201cI love her,\u201d Jace gasped out. \u201cI couldn\u2019t leave\u2014\u201d he stopped, choking.<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m sorry, old man,\u201d Connor whispered, and brought the blade down, severing Jace\u2019s neck. His body disintegrated before their eyes, a pile of ash the only thing left as a reminder to what might have been.<\/p>\n
Connor walked over to Eve, his cold eyes taking in her weakening form where she\u2019d propped herself up against the wall. \u201cHow could you?\u201d she said, gasping, tears pooling in her eyes. \u201cYou ruined everything! You said\u2014\u201d she labored for breath, \u201cyou hated him!\u201d<\/p>\n
Shrugging, Connor watched apathetically as she crumpled, sliding to the floor. \u201cSometimes I do hate him, but he\u2019s my father, Eve. The only one I\u2019ve got left. You should\u2019ve known that a blood tie is always stronger.\u201d<\/p>\n
She sobbed once, and as she clutched her wound, her eyes slid shut.<\/p>\n
Eve was dead.<\/p>\n
The moment the last breath left Eve\u2019s body, Connor seemed to wilt. His fingers loosened around the sword and it dropped to the floor soundlessly, its descent muffled by the carpeting. As if defeated, his head hung down, his shoulders sagging.<\/p>\n
Angel went over to him, his hand already reaching out to grasp Connor\u2019s shoulder when the elevator doors swished open and Cordelia strode out, a bright smile on her face as she looked down at a piece of paper in her hand. He jerked his hand back, startled. Connor\u2019s head whipped over toward the elevator.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, I thought that maybe\u2014\u201d she looked up and halted immediately, the now unimportant paper fluttering to the floor. Her words came in a gasp. \u201cOh, my God! Connor!\u201d<\/p>\n
Her hand flew to her mouth and covered it, tears welling in her eyes as she took in the violent scene and the look of utter weariness on Connor\u2019s face. Walking over to him, she reached for him, but he backed up, away from her and toward the door.<\/p>\n
Like a startled deer, Connor\u2019s eyes darted back and forth, to Angel, to Wesley, to Cordelia and back again. He wrapped his arms around himself as if cold, and he trembled, shaking visibly.<\/p>\n
\u201cI can\u2019t\u2014I just can\u2019t do this.\u201d Finally, his eyes rested on Angel\u2019s, and suddenly, all the barriers in his gaze were gone. Angel\u2019s heart wrenched as he saw the naked emotion there, the sorrow, the self-loathing. It was obvious that everything had drained Connor of whatever happiness he\u2019d possessed.<\/p>\n
All that was left was pain.<\/p>\n
Angel opened his mouth to reassure his son, to offer some comfort if he could, but Connor shook his head.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Dad. Don\u2019t say anything.\u201d Connor\u2019s eyes welled up with tears. \u201cThey found out I\u2019d seen you and they thought I was betraying them. I had to make it convincing, but I didn\u2019t mean to say so much. It\u2019s just that I don\u2019t know what I feel and\u2014\u201d He choked back a sob.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s okay, son,\u201d Angel said softly, fighting with every ounce of his inner strength to keep from going over and pulling his son into his embrace. Cordy moved to his side, her hand sliding gently into his and squeezing, offering him what silent support she could.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not okay!\u201d Connor shouted and then quieted, whispering, \u201cI don\u2019t hate you. I don\u2019t! But these horrible feelings are there, deep inside, and they keep coming out. I can\u2019t be here with you right now. It\u2019s all too much. I can\u2019t take it. I have to go!\u201d<\/p>\n
He turned abruptly, striding for the door. He came to a jerking halt when Angel spoke again.<\/p>\n
\u201cI love you, Connor.\u201d<\/p>\n
The room seemed to echo with his declaration. Connor stood, frozen, for a fraction of a second, then nodded slowly.<\/p>\n
\u201cI know,\u201d he whispered.<\/p>\n
And then he was gone.<\/p>\n
Epilogue<\/b><\/p>\n
The silence in Angel\u2019s bedroom was anything but uncomfortable. As the darkness surrounded them, Angel tightened his grip on Cordelia, his lips faintly brushing her forehead, murmuring his love into her hair. It was so amazing. She was so amazing. He was so, so blessed to have her back. He would never forget that, even if he lived 1000 years.<\/p>\n
The only thing keeping him from total and utter bliss was the lack of his son. They hadn\u2019t heard from Connor since the day he\u2019d slipped out of Angel\u2019s office. Every day, he kept hoping for something, anything that would tell him his son was all right. At least when Connor had his memory altered, Angel had known where he was, that he was safe, that he was loved. Now, though, Angel\u2019s dreams were plagued with scenarios where Connor was in danger and helpless. Where Connor was unloved and depressed. Where Connor became destructive again and tried to hurt himself or others.<\/p>\n
Somehow, deep down, Angel knew that Connor had moved past that. He knew that Connor would be all right and that he would come back to them someday. Maybe not happy, but moving toward the neighborhood of adjusted. He knew, in his heart, that Connor would openly return his love someday. It was only a matter of time, but the problem was convincing his worrisome mind of that fact. At the strangest parts of the day, he\u2019d find himself staring blankly out into space, wondering where Connor was at that moment and what he was doing. Worrying himself into a frenzy until his Cordy-shaped lifeline came back to pull him out of it. Until Cordelia snapped her fingers in front of his face and distracted him with the love that she offered him.<\/p>\n
Cordelia had indeed become his salvation. Without her, he didn\u2019t know how he\u2019d ever survived life. He\u2019d thought, when she\u2019d died, that he could move on, that he could make it without her. Certainly, she\u2019d been a powerful force in his life, but he\u2019d never truly realized how much until she was gone. Really gone. Her coma had given him an excuse to deny his feelings under the hope that she\u2019d one day wake up.<\/p>\n
But here she was, restored to him. As if aware of his thoughts, Cordelia stirred against him, draping her leg across his thigh and skimming her palm down his bare chest. Her fingers tickled his belly, and she looked up at him with a lazy smile.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, handsome,\u201d she said, grinning sleepily.<\/p>\n
\u201cHey, gorgeous,\u201d he said back, kissing her deeply, both of them breathless when they parted.<\/p>\n
\u201cMmm,\u201d she sighed, her eyes sliding shut again in pleasure. \u201cI can totally get used to that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou aren\u2019t used to it yet?\u201d he asked, grinning.<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t think I\u2019ll ever be used to it. Used to it means that you can forget about it and think about more exciting things. I want you to always be exciting, baby,\u201d she said, kissing his chest lightly.<\/p>\n
Just then, her stomach rumbled loudly and he chuckled.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo you\u2019re saying you\u2019d pick me over food right now?\u201d<\/p>\n
She raised a haughty eyebrow. \u201cI love you, but I\u2019m not completely stupid. You cook. I need food. Good combo, in my opinion. If you feed me, we both get to have fun,\u201d she said, then winked at him.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think I can arrange that,\u201d he said, sliding out of bed and into his sweatpants. Cordy pulled his shirt over her head, rolling up the long sleeves a few times until her hands were uncovered. She yawned widely, then stretched, running her fingers through her hair. Angel\u2019s mouth dropped open as she arched her back, giving him a tantalizing view of her ass peeking from the hem of his shirt. He sighed and shook his head as he headed for the door.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou coming?\u201d he asked, holding the bedroom door open for her.<\/p>\n
\u201cHave been all night,\u201d she said impertinently, winking at him again.<\/p>\n
He just rolled his eyes at her, then turned to follow. Immediately, he ran into her. She\u2019d stopped almost directly out of the door.<\/p>\n
\u201cAngel, look,\u201d she said, her voice a whisper.<\/p>\n
Angel followed her gaze, and his heart flipped over at what he found. His eyes brimmed with tears as he saw Connor, his beloved son, sprawled out on the couch under one of the throw blankets, the worn teddy bear clutched in his arms. Strangely, the toy didn\u2019t look out of place in the arms of a grown man. It looked as if he\u2019d finally figured out where he belonged. Angel reached for Cordy, pulling her back into his embrace and resting his chin on her shoulder.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s back,\u201d Cordelia said, a wistful note of happiness in her voice. Her hand lightly stroked the back of his where it lay against her tummy. \u201cYou can finally be happy, Angel.\u201d<\/p>\n
One tear escaped Angel\u2019s eye and tracked down his cheek, landing with a soft plop on the shoulder of Cordelia\u2019s shirt.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was happy before he came home,\u201d Angel whispered. \u201cI never thought I could be happy without him, but you made it possible, Cordy.\u201d<\/p>\n
She turned in his arms and cupped his jaw. \u201cI love you, too, Angel.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re right, though,\u201d he added as he gripped her tightly. \u201cI can be happy now. Happy for Connor. Happy that my son is alive, safe, and here.\u201d<\/p>\n
Exactly where he belonged.<\/p>\n
End.<\/b><\/p>\n