Archive for July 2016

Monster Mash Epi   1 comment

Special guest star- Hely!!!!!! She was kind enough to continue on and do the epilogue, and I just know you’re gonna love it! Thanks hely; you are the best! :lick:

And they lived….?

“”The motel room was sparse but clean with an over abundance of white that at least helped keep it cool. Awkwardly, Angel prowled the rooms length pretending to be checking for… something.

“Looking for something?” Cordelia asked archly coming in the door.

No, just didn’t know what else to do, “not really” he answered with a sigh and finally settled his brown eyes on her. “Why are we here again?”

“Simple. We’re gonna have some uninterrupted talk time before we get back to LA. No way am I putting up with this dragging on for months,” she waved a hand at his stiff and uncomfortable face to show him what ‘this’ was.

Briefly Angel wondered how he’d let her even get them here. This kind of blow-by-blow analysis he really didn’t need right now. Plunging his hands in his pockets the newly re-ensouled vampire rocked back on his heels and firmly shut his mouth.

Seeing it Cordelia sighed and abruptly decided the more aggressive the better. She was in the rare position of being completely wronged and they both knew it. “Take your coat off and get on the bed, Angel,” she instructed firmly.

What? His jaw dropped in disbelief certain he’d miss-heard. “What did you say?”

“Super hearing vamp going deaf now? I don’t think so. You heard me, coat off and then lie on the bed,” Cordelia repeated crossing her arms and arching both brows to show him she meant business.

Angel didn’t move a muscle, just stared back at her mutely communicating a big fat, no. He was as tense as sprung wire and behind the blank mask his thoughts were whirling with only one thing being certain. Cordelia and beds were the worst kind of idea.

Cordelia sighed and flung out her arms. This was the delicate bit and if she couldn’t get him to co-operate now then this was a waste of time and she’d just tossed away fifty bucks. “If our close friendship means anything to you, Angel then do as I ask. Or don’t you want to save it?”

That was a low blow and if possible the vampire stiffened even more. Dammit, she always knew what buttons to push and sometimes he felt like a puppet following on her string. Not that he had a choice, caring about someone was like that and you just had to trust the strings wouldn’t turn into chains.

“Of course I want to save it. I just don’t get why you’re doing this?” he gritted out, irritably shrugging out of his leather duster and tossing it on the single padded seat next to the fixed wooden counter. Cordelia rolled her eyes and his brows snapped down, “I meant this getting on the bed stuff not the talk,” he knew the reason for the talk all too damn well.

“Don’t get it- do it,” Cordelia whispered, hiding her elation that he was willing to do something so unutterably alien- obeying a human. She knew he was hurting too from what had just happened and yet he was, for her, bending over backwards to try and make amends.

Angel was grateful she was even talking to him and hadn’t run screaming the moment she could. Just imaging that had his whole body aching with a wave of pain. Dammit, if Cordelia wants you on the bed- get on the frickin bed already. He lay down.

Cordelia didn’t give him a chance to change his mind and sat down with her hip pressed into his, then rested a palm on his still and shirt covered chest. Angel tensed then forced his muscles to relax. Their eyes caught and held, licking his lips Angel asked hesitantly, “What do you want?”

Leaning down, Cordelia looked down at him steadily, “Do you love me?” she asked bluntly.

Oh God, what a question. How could she even ask him that after what he’d done? “You know I do,” Angel got out in a rasp. If she was searching for a way to punish him them so be it. Angel waited for the look of disgust, the thrust away and then the diatribe to begin.

Cordelia let that sink in then nodded gently, her face as still as a summer lake. “You’re wondering how I can even mention that after the whole Angelus thing aren’t you?”

Here we go, Angel nodded and his fingers dug into the bed covers. Then she surprised him again and laid her head down on her fingers, letting her breath wash over the cotton of his pure black shirt, “Do you know that I’ve figured out about you and you’re alter ego?”

Cordelia looked up to see the look of hurt expectation on his face, “This body of yours is like a car with two drivers and it does what it does depending on who’s at the wheel. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“You don’t blame me for what happened. I knew that already, Cordy,” Angel replied. She didn’t have to, he did. If she was nothing more than a friend then he could accept what she said and just move on. But he loved her and the fact that she had to be struggling to even be in the same room with him right now was killing him slowly from the inside out.

Silently scrutinizing his darkly handsome face, Cordelia slowly pulled in a breath to state with characteristic bluntness, “You don’t disgust me, Angel any more than I disgust myself. I love you too and that’s enough of an explanation for me.”

Angel shook his head on the pillow and he couldn’t meet her eyes any more, the ceiling over her head swam with moisture. “I didn’t give you a choice. I was rough and … coarse,” he swallowed thickly to try and get rid of the uncalled for tears. Tears were human, soft and silently asked for sympathy. He wasn’t allowed the first two and wasn’t entitled to the last.

Okay that was it, drastic measures it was. Cordelia turned her head to watch as her hand dug inside in the purse she’d discreetly pulled to the side of the bed. The tinkle of metal on metal caught Angel’s attention and his face furrowed in confusion. Then an almost comic expression of amazement crossed his face when Cordelia dangled the handcuffs above his chest.

She slid one on and snapped it closed before he could recover enough to shake the cold metal ring off. “Let’s just see who disgusts who then shall we,” it wasn’t a question.

“Cor-del-ia”, Angel warned in a low growl, distracted from his storm of guilt and self-loathing.

“A-n-gel,” she sang back and then snagged his other hand, squeezing his fingers in warning and then paused to wait for him to go still again before snapping the second one shut and attaching it to the bed post. Finished Cordelia sat back and couldn’t help a wide grin. “Wow, that’s such a good look for you. Who knew that Angel’s and chains make such a good combination?”

Provoked, Angel growled and pushed back his head to test the strength of the links. One good yank and he’d be free. Two fingers tugged on his chin, bringing his head back down and her eyes caught his again. Instantly a pressure built in his chest and the look in those warm hazel depths had him meekly settling back down.

Delighted with him, Cordelia leaned down and rubbed her lips lingeringly over his feeling the slight softness of his pout harden slightly as he was helpless to prevent a response. His lips were like plump silk and she did it again before leaning up, braced with her arms on his chest, “No disgust there,” she whispered a little breathlessly.

At first Angel could do no more than shake his head, half in confusion and half in agreement. Her breasts were pressed to the side of his chest as she leaned over him and the pressure of those soft mounds even with their clothing acting as a barrier was electric, roughening his skin with goose bumps.

Sensing a verbal response was required he managed to croak out, “none here, anyway.”

“Hmm, how about now?” Cordelia asked huskily as she lifted herself up and draped her still clothed body over his, aligning them so that they matched perfectly. Underneath her pelvis she could feel the instinctive hardening of his shaft but waited for him to say it too. In her experience there was nothing like getting it out there to drive the point home.

“None,” his voice was little more than a deep-throated rumble.

A fine trembling caused the chains to rattle and Angel had to battle down the urge to simply snap the cuffs and haul her underneath him. Damned vampire instincts always wanting to dominate and keep control. Cordelia saw the hot flare in his dark eyes and took a moment to glory in the excited lust flaring into life in her belly. Relief for them both added to the mix and her eyes closed to hide the telling emotion.

Her rising excitement was discernible to the vampire beneath her and Angel’s nostrils flared to catch the elusive scent making him groan when he couldn’t suppress his own burgeoning arousal, “Cordelia, I think you should stop,” he almost pleaded.

Cordelia opened her eyes again, “why?” she was visibly confused and disconcerted now.

Because pretty soon I’m gonna reach that point where if you want to stop I’ll go insane, he thought but didn’t say. “No reason, ignore me,” he said instead. If Cordelia wanted to stop later then he’d find what it took and be glad she could bear to touch him at all. God, I’m pathetic.

This time when she kissed him he was right there with her and it was a breathless Cordelia that pulled back to dazedly stare down at him. “Does that mean I’m finally getting through that stubborn head of yours?” she asked with a smile on now rosy and flushed lips.

“Getting though with what?” Angel asked, forcibly having to drag his eyes from the soft flesh he’d just been allowed to pay homage too with such thoroughness. Then his brow cleared. Proving she wasn’t revolted by him. “Sorry, yeah I’m getting the message. But if you wanna try it again I don’t mind.”

She laughed, “I bet, but since you ask.”

It was a while before Cordelia came back up for air. On the bed, her legs tangled with his and dimly she thanked her stars that she hadn’t worn her usual uniform of mouth-watering short skirt. Not they didn’t have their own advantage but right now rubbing herself over a certain vampire was top of the agenda.

Whoo boy, the room was certainly heating up, “I think your overdressed,” she solemnly advised the brown eyes below her and without waiting for a reply Cordelia dragged her reluctant body off his to sit up to attack the buttons on his shirt.

“What about you?” asked Angel when he could untangle his tongue. Cordelia huffing irritably at her fingers which all seemed to have turned into thumbs shot him a look from under lashes, “later.” She promised huskily, “I have a plan.”

Oh God, didn’t she always? He lifted up to help and stared mesmerized at the pink tip of her tongue currently gracing her lips between white teeth as she worked at releasing him from his shirt. How did they end up like this again? Oh right, Angelus. Hot flashes of memory sizzled across his brain and for the first time they didn’t burn his conscience.

She didn’t hate him, wasn’t repulsed and from this viewpoint wasn’t in the least bit emotionally scarred from what had happened. God, he loved this woman so much it hurt.

Hot lips like brands scorched his chest as she laid the two sides back, running back and forth across his suddenly begging nipples before trailing over the dips and valleys of rigid muscle to his neck. Angel sucked in breath and closed his eyes almost undone by the feel of Cordelia plastered to him with her breath washing over the skin of his throat.

The neck was an explosive part of any vampire and even souled Angel was no exception. Please, please, please. Kiss me- bite me, anything just ahhh, Cordelia latched onto the skin over his jugular and suckled making his eyes almost cross at the resulting surge of intense sensation. His whole body throbbed and then rose off the bed, straining the metal links of the cuffs almost to breaking point.

“Down boy,” Cordelia demanded with a smile against his skin, pushing with one hand to press the hard muscled chest back down so he rested on the mattress. “Don’t go getting all over-excited,” she warned and came up to glare at him.

Seeing just how overexcited he was had Cordelia’s breath hitching in her throat. “What’s this?” she asked running the pad of one finger across full lips now disrupted by a pair of gleaming fangs. Topaz eyes competed with the bedside lamps, catching her fascinated gaze. “Full fang face, huh? Should I feel complimented?”

Tense but needy, Angel made an impulsive decision and instead of replying sucked the tip of that finger into his mouth, flicking his tongue over the sensitive flesh. Fists clenched to contain himself, Angel watched the deep flush rise up to color her face and felt his cock harden to the point where he could howl at the pressure.

Don’t be afraid, he begged silently. Cordelia kept the finger still even when he gently turned his head left and right so that his fangs ever so slightly scraped over her finger. They where like needle points but he didn’t even come close to breaking her skin.

Lordy she loved this vampire of hers. He had the uncanny ability to make her feel all soft and melty like now, or hard and ready and for anything when she stood next to him going into battle. The way he saw her helped her accept and embrace both sides of herself.

“C’mere you,” Cordelia whispered and smiling wickedly she made him lean up to her before stroking her tongue between his lips and sliding deep, feeling the edge of those fangs against her lips. Soft palms cupped his jaw and that coupled with the honeyed slide of her warm moist tongue had him squirming with rising need.

Angel captured the nimble tongue and suckled on it, making Cordelia’s fingers tighten on his jaw and thighs to flex around his hips. It was time to wrest some control back before he came apart and just pounced. “Take your clothes off, Cordy,”

More than willing to comply with the inferno building inside Cordelia sat back to whip the tight v-necked shirt over her head, speedily followed by her bra. Gazing down out of heavy lidded eyes she watched the topaz thicken and focus on her breasts and her breathing quickened even more while the pulse in her neck set up its own siren call to the unmistakably aroused vampire she was sitting on.

His gaze flicked up to pierce her, “I want you so much, Cordy. Stop now or forever hold your peace, okay?” it was a telling admission even to himself that despite a mountain of guilt and love to soften his instincts he had no choice but to issue the warning.

Was he kidding her? Jesus, she was about to go up in flames and they’d done little more than kiss. He was lucky she hadn’t just jumped him before now. “Forget stopping. I want you too,” she panted and attacked her zipper then his. It took some doing but finally she got them both naked.

It would have been much simpler to undo the cuffs but Cordelia didn’t consider it since having him at her mercy was doing more for her already outrageously heated libido than any type of love drug could do. Angel knew that and so let the illusion remain.

Clasping their hands Cordelia rubbed her body over his, hers damp and warm against his cool one, loving the friction only a little less than the sharp evocative prod of his marble hard shaft at the juncture of her thighs. There were no barriers now and she was drenched with the arousal that knowledge wrought.

Impatience to feel, touch, taste and simply let herself go surged up to swamp Cordelia’s already lust addled mind. Squirming against his cock she lifted up to slide the thick length between the moist folds, driving them both higher towards a distant peak that seemed eerily familiar. Angel groaned and didn’t care when it morphed into a long low growl, “Come up here. I want to taste you,” he panted.

Hazel met glittering, demanding topaz and shivering at the idea of it, Cordelia sucked in a slow breath then holding his gaze she dragged her pelvis up the length of his ridged abdomen, teasing them both. Then almost shaking with nervous excitement and supporting her upper body with arms braced against the wall behind the bed Cordelia lifted up so that her knees rested on either side of his shoulders, leaving her most intimate place exposed to his avid attention.

Touching her in no other way, Angel plumbed the depths of her, muttering encouragement as each deep plunge and long slow suck threatened to blow the top right of her head. Cordelia’s breathing got more and more ragged and her head fell back while helpless not to her hips undulated in a jerky rhythm, matching the pounding of her blood until finally the orgasm simply jolted her right out of her body.

She was so out of it she would have fallen, either to the side or back Cordy had no idea, if Angel didn’t have hold of her. That seemed strange until she realized he’d snapped the cuffs, now dangling uselessly from his wrists as he kept her up with both hands firmly clasping her hips.

Still recovering and feeling like she’d run a marathon Cordelia’s gaze dropped to look down her body, only to get caught and held by a pair of dark chocolate eyes still mixed with topaz while they lovingly ate up her unhidden response to his love making. “You cheated, you broke the cuffs,” where had that come from she wondered then everything went topsy turvy and she found her self pinned tenderly beneath a very intent Angel.

“My turn now,” he whispered and without any other warning he mounted her, surging inside the sopping entrance still slick with her recent climax.

Despite everything it felt so damned natural that thick invasive slide that tears flooded her eyes, she didn’t wait for him to ask, “happy tears,” she advised softly and clasped him tightly to her, “make love to me, Angel, I want it all.”

“I will, I want it all too,” Angel assured her low and steady. God, she felt unbelievable, like coming home and finding a fantasy land of everything you ever dreamed of wanting. “I love you Cordelia Chase, promise you’ll stay with me,” he asked needing to hear it and gathered her so close her pulse seemed to become his.

The slow heavy possessiveness of his thrusts didn’t abate and as if joined in an intimate dance her chest and belly rode and rubbed against his as he surged inside. “I’ll stay, nothing can drive me away. I think we proved that over the last twenty four hours,” Cordelia whispered and closed her eyes to do nothing more than feel, give and be taken.


Thank you again, Hely, for a wonderful ending to Scorch’s challenge.


Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete

Monster Mash 3   1 comment

Hide and Eat…

“Come out, come out, wherever you are,” Angelus grinned as he strolled down the landing, giving the occasional slam of his hand against doors he passed.

Oh, he knew where his little fuck toy was hiding, but, hell he had time to play the game. After all, she and the whiny soul had come alone- and no one knew what had happened. By the time they did, Angelus would be long gone, with his new childe in tow. He grinned, running a hand over the rapidly hardening bulge straining his hastily thrown on pants. After he’d taken that tight body for a ride of its life first!

Shitshitshitshit! Cordy couldn’t believe the frightening situation she was in right now; hiding between a wall and a desk in one of the unused rooms upstairs, buck nekkid and crapping herself. Each time she heard a door slam or his velvety teasing voice, her whole body tightened with fear- and reluctant arousal.

She was still reeling from the touch of his big, hard body over, around and inside of hers, and the ache between her quivering thighs was from more than his earlier nibble. He really knew how to eke out every tiny response from the female body, and that made him even more dangerous. Cordy was in no doubt that the now-soulless vampire had the intent to kill her- or even worse, turn her.

She shuddered as she recalled the way he’d pounded her into his mattress- and that was just the diluted version of the demon! God knows what he’d put her body through now all restraints were gone. Her lips trembled and frightened hazel eyes misted with tears; she wanted her Angel back…

Angelus sighed dramatically and walked determinedly towards door #5; the hiding and seeking part of the game was over- now for the fucking and eating. God, he loved being a soulless demon.

Cordy couldn’t help the small yelp that left her shaking lips when the door suddenly shot open, slamming back and hitting the wall. Silence blanketed the room and she held her breath; had he gone, or was he still -?

“Hey, baby, miss me?”

Cordy shrieked when he appeared almost magically in front of her, reaching down to yank her from her hiding place. “Let’s play some more, hmm?” she swallowed down the apprehension and attempted to come out with something witty and cutting, but her mouth parted and silence prevailed. Angelus looked from the petrified brunette to the desk she’d hidden behind and grinned.

“You know what? Soul boy had this little fantasy of chasing you round your desk; and guess how it ended?” his grin widened into a smirk as he manhandled her backwards onto the cold surface of the desk. Pinning her down by her throat, his other hand went to the fastenings of his pants, opening them and releasing his hard cock. Forcing her legs apart, he pulled her into the cradle of his thighs and plunged roughly in to the hilt. “Fuck, Cor, you feel so sweet,” he growled low in his throat.

Cordy hissed at his rough entry, her hips jerking against his, absently noting he hadn’t even bothered to push down his pants. Leaning back, Angelus watched his throbbing cock roughly enter and retreat from her tight hot core, his mouth curling with sensual lust at the sight of her moist pink flesh surrounding him. Pushing her thighs wider apart until her knees pressed against the wood, he quickened his pace.

The only sound in the gloom-laden room was the slap of wet skin and her hitching, panting breath. Several minutes later, he released his hard grip on her thighs and pulled her legs up until her heels rested on his broad shoulders, then he wrapped his hands around the front of her thighs and hammered into her body; within seconds, Cordy felt the beginnings of an orgasm and her neck arched as she keened loudly.

Angelus reveled in the desperate clutching of her inner walls and rode her through it, his hips slamming into her at an unnaturally fast pace. Wrapping her legs around his waist, he loomed over her and captured a tight nipple, suckling it without mercy until her body tightened once more around his, this time he allowed his taut body release and pistoned between her clutching legs feverishly as his cool seed flooded into her melting body.

Roaring like the demon he was, his head darted up; game face at the ready and sunk his fangs deep into her throat. The contact triggered Cordy’s second orgasm, her mouth opening wide and screaming soundlessly whilst Angelus drank lustily from her punctured artery…then his whole body exploded with white light; fangs wrenching away from her throat as he snarled in fury.

Cordy floated out of her euphoria and slowly became aware of Angelus’ large, heavy body draped over hers. His whole frame shuddered as he clutched her close; his cock, still hard, embedded deep into her body- then his dark head lifted, and the deep remorse in those chocolate eyes stunned her. He was back! Somehow, by some miracle, her Angel was back. Without another thought, she clutched him too her in a giant, ecstatic bear hug.

“ThankGodThankGodThankGod!” Angel lay shocked in her frantic embrace, all too aware of her hot walls still surrounding his cooler hard flesh, and the soft press of her amazing breasts against his chest. Recent memories flooded his dazed brain and his cock twitched traitorously, hardening even more and ready for another go- then he wrenched his torso away, but had enough sense to ease his aching cock gently out of her body before turning his back on her. God, what must she think of him!

Cordy blinked at the suddenness of his move and lay where he’d left her staring at his pale back and silently watching the play of muscles along his spine as they bunched and flexed. Yes, her broody, sometimes dorky vampire was back- and most likely alphabetizing his recent sins right this moment. “Angel…. it wasn’t your fault. Angel” she whispered softly, flinching at his instant reply.

“And you know that how?” he looked over his shoulder, his dark eyes compulsively running from her face to still opened body, shuddering and jerking his head away. “I may have been soulless, but trust me when I say, he just did everything I’ve wanted to do myself for months.” Her lovely face flushed at his bald confession. Who’d a thunk it?

“Does that include turning me into a vamp-ho?” her mouth twitched into a small, helpless smile, which widened when he spun around instantly.

“God, NO, Cor,” his eyes and expression held pure horror at the thought; his demon might have wanted that, but the soul adored her heat, her life and her inner sunshine.

And then they were back to an awkward silence. Cordy watched his dark eyes greedily devour every inch of her exposed body, and belatedly pulled her legs together with a blush. That move shook him out of his visual worship and he glanced down, acutely aware of his rigid shaft still uncovered and throbbing like hell. Tucking himself in with care and rapidly zipping up his pants, Angel grimaced and glanced around the room until his frantic eyes rested on an old discarded blanket.

Retrieving it and shaking it out sharply, he turned back to the brunette who was now sitting upright and rubbing her tender spine. Guilt flooded him anew as he figured her soft flesh would most probably bear bruises by the following day- it was bad enough seeing the surprisingly neat yet deep mark on her otherwise flawless throat.

Deliberately clearing his expression, Angel wrapped the blanket around Cordy, avoiding those sharp eyes that watched his face too closely. God, she was so beautiful, and part of his guilt was for that fact that he couldn’t regret having a chance to taste all she had to offer- he was only regretful that he’d hurt her; and most likely ruined any chance of a future relationship.

“Come on, let’s head back to my room- to get some clothes, I mean,” Angel stumbled over his words, knowing he was making a bad situation worse.

He couldn’t even look at the slightly trembling brunette, for fear of her seeing the remnants of lust he couldn’t shake off. God, if Cordy knew he really wanted to drop her to the floor and lose himself in the body his demon had already violated, she’d run and never look back.

Cordy followed behind the vampire, pretty subdued on the outside, but freaking – and angry within. What the hell? He was acting like he was disgusted with her; couldn’t even look at her! Her mouth twisted bitterly. Did he blame her for letting his demon have his way- twice? That had to be it, because no way in hell had she seen even a smidgen of shame in those dark eyes.

As they passed the stairs, a terrific crash echoed through the hallway downstairs. Cordy clutched her chest and Angel turned instantly to pull her body into his and peered down the stairs. As soon as they saw the Slayer, followed by Giles, Xander and Willow, Cordy pulled away from the protection of the vampire’s arms and huddled at the top, letting him make his way down alone.

“Back off, Deadboy!” Angel lifted a dark brow as he took in the ready stances of three of the trespasser, whilst quirking a lip on seeing the redhead half hide behind the Ex-Watcher. ” The cross that Xander Harris waved around irritated the vampire rather than cause the fear the boy obviously hoped to achieve.

“I assume this has to do with what happened….” He paused on seeing the early morning sun attempting to creep in through the unhinged door, “…last night?” All four nodded their heads, but refused to relax their stance. “Don’t worry, Buffy, if you had anything to do with my re-souling, it worked.” He reassured them wearily; uncomfortably aware that his seer hadn’t moved from the top of the stairs.

“I’m sure you will understand our need to be 100% certain of that, Angel?” Giles took a tentative step forward, a bottle that most definitely carried holy water clutched in his hand. “Where is Cordelia?” Ahh: the perfect proof that all was well in SoulsVille.

Angel half turned his head towards the stairs, “Cordy?” after a moment’s hesitation, the brunette cautiously descended, and Angel couldn’t stifle the growl as Xander’s eyes bugged at seeing her luscious figure draped with a blanket. She stopped when she reached the bottom.

“Hi guys,” Cordy smiled awkwardly and held tightly onto the front of the dusty blanket. Buffy stepped forward this time, casting Angel a wary glance before pinning the brunette with wide, deliberately expressionless green eyes.

“Hate to do this, Cor- but could you step over here?” the Slayer still stood in full daylight that streamed in from the open doorway, and Cordy instantly got what she was checking for. Without a word, she walked forward until the light brought out the chestnut highlights in her dark, mussed hair and the still weak sunlight bathed her face.

“Still of the living, Buffy. Honestly, Angel is back to his broody self,” Cordy spoke with a half smile, flicking her head towards the vampire who stood out of line of the light, but refused to look at him directly. “Now if you don’t mind, I really need to get dressed- it’s not exactly warm in this mausoleum.” She shivered slightly and retreated as soon as the blonde nodded her head.

As she escaped up the stairs, Cordy heard Buffy ask to speak to Angel privately, a hint of chastisement in her voice.

Here we go! she swallowed the thick lump that lodge in her throat and quickened her pace, missing the puppy dog expression on the dark vampire as he watched her go.

Confessions of a Vampire

“Why didn’t you tell me?” here we go! Was it wrong for Angel to feel like a moth stuck on a pin? Because right now, he was wriggling and feeling more trapped as the seconds went by.

“Buffy…. we haven’t seen each other for over a year- and have you told me about the guys in your life?” Buffy had the grace to blush at that one. Angel continued on. “I found out about Soldier boy when you nicely threw it in my face when that thing happened with Faith- and don’t tell me you meant it any other way than as a spiteful dig.” He dropped his dark head for a moment and checked out his boots. Heavy silence pervaded the room.

“Fair enough,” Buffy finally admitted, biting her lip hard then trying another tactic. “I’m just saying that finding out about you two through someone like Ethan Rayne wasn’t of the good,” Angel’s head lifted sharply at that.

“Ethan Rayne?” his lip curled. “So he was behind whatever the hell happened last night.” Taking a deep breath, he caught the blonde’s eye and admitted, ” Cordy doesn’t know how I feel about her.” Buffy arched her eyebrows.

“Kinda figured she knows now,” surprised when the vampire ducked his head and avoided her eyes. “You’re kidding me, right? If you two did the horizontal mambo pre-soul lossage, then how could she not…?” realization hit her, “oh, She thinks it was all Angelus, right?” Angel nodded his head wearily. What a fucking mess.

“Didn’t you tell her the truth?” again the eye-avoidance. Buffy rubbed a hand across the back of her neck and sighed heavily; God, and she thought they had problems communicating! His dark head lifted abruptly and looked towards the closed door; seemed like the brunette was back downstairs.

“Look, Buffy, can we not talk about this right now?” he edged towards the door uncomfortably, needing to be with Cordy – and especially wanting to see if he could gauge her mood. Buffy stood staring at him for a second before shaking her head ruefully.

“By right now, I read Never, am I right? – Oh, forget I asked, okay? Where relationships are concerned, we’re both suck majorly.” She blew out a breath. “Come on, let’s go pow wow,” turning abruptly, she opened the door and walked out. Angel followed, subdued.

His eyes instantly went to his seer, who sat on the couch between Giles and Willow, looking as uncomfortable as them. Willow fidgeted and Giles held himself rigidly.

“Ahh, Angel,” The man looked relieved to see the vampire and hurriedly filled both him and Cordy in on the events of the previous night, finally asking the big question.

“Um… I know this a rather sensitive subject, but due to the importance of the new Restoration spell, I need to know if you and-and, um Cordelia…what I mean to say is-” Giles swallowed hard and shifted uncomfortably. Angel stepped in before Cordelia went any redder than she already was.

“Yes, we did, and yes, Angelus made a show,” Quietly and firmly spoken. Giles nodded, relieved that he hadn’t had to continue that line of questioning. Then he cleared his throat.

“Yes, well…it seems the spell worked after all,” straightening up, Giles caught his eyes; “I also have the pleasure of informing you that the clause in the old spell is, um, nullified,” Angel’s face tightened, but besides that, his expression was unreadable.

“You soul is now bound, Angel” he clarified bluntly. Everyone in the room held their collective breath waiting for some kind of reaction from the still vampire, but were disappointed.

“Are you sure about this?” Angel asked coolly, one eye on the brunette who was now staring at her lap, her face now pale and drawn. “Giles nodded confidently,

“Oh, yes- the spell would not have worked at all otherwise. The fact that Cordelia is here, safe and well is proof enough,” he smiled faintly, “luckily for us, Willow has also developed an innate ability to-to sense things others cannot.” Willow nodded enthusiastically.

“Yep; all soully- definitely the good vampire,” she grinned then blushed as everyone’s attention landed on her for a moment. “Anyway, I felt it when I recited the last line.” She added softly. Angel merely nodded his head- then Cordy shot to her feet.

“You know what? Lack of sleep has caught up with me; would you guys mind if I shoot off to get some shuteye before we go back tonight?” at the unanimous shaking of heads, Cordy made her goodbyes and disappeared out of the room, not once meeting the silent vampire’s eyes.

No Place like Home?

[the start of Hely workings]

Cordy fidgeted in her seat and flicked covert glances at the equally silent vampire. He’d managed to avoid her all day, waiting until sundown before showing up to finally knock on her bedroom door.

Giving up after hour of searching for the elusive vampire, surprisingly she’s actually fallen asleep- after about half an hour of weeping like a baby. Angel being so determined to stay away spoke volumes about just how much this trip had cost them. Which was just great- Not! What had happened to their easy, close friendship? A trip down memory lane and all that just flew out of the window.

When was he going to mention the only good thing to come out of this whole fiasco, screw that, if she had too, so be it, “So… a super-glued soul- bet you’re all excited,” Angel flicked her a glance, his eyes managing not to actually connect with hers in any meaningful way at all.

“It hasn’t really sunk in yet,” he replied briefly, his hands tightening on the wheel when she pursed her lips, a fine brow arching. What was going on in that uniquely convoluted head of hers? Or did he even need to guess; after-all he’d only put her through hell on a very personal level hadn’t he?

He’d run out as soon as he could. Well walked actually with his head down and shoulders slumped, but it amounted to the same thing. He couldn’t face her after what he’d put her through. She was his best friend and the only good thing in this weird and not so wonderful world that he loved and knew he could count on. When he’d finally tapped on the door to let her know the sun had set his mind was a confused mess of raw guilt, desperate hope and gut deep neediness.

Cordelia, exited with her bags and her pointed glare had made it clear she wasn’t impressed with his prolonged absence. Then in a masterful act of self-assurance she’d allowed the scoobs to see them off with nothing more than calm statements of how glad she was to be going back to L.A. and seeing the others.

Amazed by her guts and sheer grit yet again and with no other choice, he’d followed her silently, resisting the urge to suggest she catch a bus if she was worried about being alone with him. He didn’t simply because he needed her beside him. God, how selfish could he get? Obviously a lot more than that because his eyes were glued to her back as she led the way out to the car.

Back in the car and for once not enjoying the feel of the warm evening wind ruffling her long dark hair, Cordelia slid another glance at the silent and obviously brooding vampire. His jaw clenched suggesting he could feel her gaze but did nothing to return it.

Oh yeah this was fun, like having a leg wax using superglue. “Are you angry with me?” Cordy asked bluntly, deciding to get that one out the way before deciding exactly how to proceed. Necessary since the answer would be the deciding factor on whether it was gonna be a staking or not.

Angel jerked, surprised and obviously confused and finally looked straight at her. “No, of course not. God, how could you even think that…? I mean, it’s erm…” Angel fell silent again and turned back to the road, sucking in a deep breath and twisting his hands nervously on the wheel. No one else had ever been able to make him feel so damned- uncertain.

Buffy had always made it clear he was in the wrong and that was that. All black and white with no grey allowed- no sirree. Not Cordelia though, she had a much broader scope than that. Usually that was a blessing, but right now he just didn’t know where he was. So uncertainty reigned.

“Is this where we get into the whole, ten words every quarter hour scenario before you finally admit you’re wallowing in guilt about what Angelus did to me?” Cordy asked with a deliberately audible, resigned sigh.

Oh yeah, this was so like how she’d imagined it would be. Angel was nothing if not predictable. Not a problem– in fact it should make this a whole lot easier. Unnoticed by the indeed wallowing vampire, she relaxed by several degrees.

“Don’t you think we should wait before getting into that? I know you must want to rip into me, but I was hoping…” he trailed off yet again. Cordelia rolled her eyes. Yup, left up to him this was gonna take a lifetime and since she didn’t have one to spare unlike some, she was gonna hurry things up- by a couple of decades.

“Pull over in here.” Here was a well-known motel chain coming up on their left.

“Where? There?” Angel asked tensing and wondering what she had planned. He knew she had a plan; Cordelia Chase always had a plan and a reason. Maybe he should just drive past it and pretend he hadn’t understood what she meant?

Cordy guessed what that guilty thoughtful look was about. “Yes, dumbass, there. Now would be good unless you plan on reversing to pick up my scattered body parts when I dive out of a moving car.”

“Hey no diving allowed.” Angel cursed when she undid her belt and sliding her a dark look indicated to pull into the car park, luckily traffic was light and the belated maneuver didn’t result in a blare of aggravated horns.


Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete

Monster Mash 2   1 comment

Part 2

Honey, I’m home! – Muwahahaha

Cordy entered the mansion and click-clacked her way towards the kitchen purposefully. Angel/us followed behind and then paused halfway. “Where are you going now?” he asked, mildly confused. She should have been heading to the stairs- or at least he should be, with her firmly thrown over one shoulder.

“Where do you think? – The whole reason for leaving a great party way too early for my liking,” she tossed back as she continued to walk in the direction of the kitchen, “is to feed the bad tempered vamp.” Angel/us grinned in a way that would have made the brunette run for the hills if she’d bothered to turn round and look.

“Can you bring it up? I really need to get out of these clothes,” the smirk remained but his deep voice merely sounded irritated.

“If climbing into something you feel more at home in makes you happier, then I’m all for it, Mister snarly.” Cordy called back with a snark from the depths of the mansion.

“That’s the idea, baby,” Angel/us’ smirk widened into a very unpleasant grin- although ‘climbing in’ sounded a bit too tame for him right now. Taking the stairs three at a time, he slipped the buttons open and hummed a low and verrry happy tune….


“Angel? Where’s he gone now?” Cordy grumbled as she pushed open his old bedroom door, looking into the apparently empty room. Puffing out an exasperated breath, she walked further into the room- then jumped a mile when the door slammed shut behind her.

“Jeez, gimme a heart attack, why doncha- Oh frick!” Cordy dropped the mug of warmed up blood and rapidly covered her bulging eyes. She did NOT just see what she thought she saw…did she?

Angel!” she squeaked high, her hands still clamped firmly over her tight-shut eyes, “put something on before I have a coronary!” Silence greeted her. After a few seconds, Cordy hesitantly dropped her hands and jumped again.

Angel/us stood a few inches in front of her- and yes, the dark vampire was still naked as a Jay bird…. a very cocky Jay bird at that. Oh, my innocent eyes! but she still couldn’t resist having a quick peek below his taut, well-muscled stomach, absently making a note to herself NEVER to make ‘fat’ comments again- although ‘big’ was definitely something she could say with total accuracy.

“Angel?” she shuttered uncertainly. He leaned in with a small grin. A grin that made her toes curl even as her heart hammered in her chest and her internal ‘Danger, Will Robinson’ alarms tripped loud enough to give her earache.

“Soulboy has left the building, my sweet,” he whispered sensually in her ear, a large hand hooking into the rather high neckline of her dress. “Now, about that punishment we discussed,” the grin widened as he tore the dress from her body, letting out a low whistle of appreciation as amber eyes ran over her matching fragile black silk strapless bra, thong and black silk hold-up stockings. Cordy’s mouth flapped open and shut soundlessly, unable to form thought, never mind speech!

“The dress may have been Dru, baby, but this…” he ran a cool finger from neck to groin as she stood frozen to the spot, “…is all my Corrrrdeeee” he purred.

Before she could shake out of her stunned funk, her world was up ended and she found herself face down over his naked, heavily muscled thighs as he sat on the bed. “Angel! What the hell do you think your doing?” the firm pitch she’d attempted failed miserably and her voice instead came out in a shaky squeak. His large, cool hand swept the near-naked globes of her ass before giving her flesh a gentle squeeze.

“You really don’t think I’d let you get away with crawling all over Spike like a rash, did you?” his velvet soft tone was threaded with a hint of steel as those powerful fingers flexed warningly against her butt cheek. Cordy was about to reply as she geared herself to push herself up when his palm cracked against her tender flesh.

The little scream she let out went straight to his cock, and Angel/us moaned even as he soothed her reddened ass tenderly before letting his palm connect again. The second scream sounded more like a moan and he licked his lips in silent appreciation; the little vixen was liking it, obviously. Eyeing the bright red hand prints, Angel/us pursed those lips and calculated how many more times he could spank her before it went past pleasure/pain and full on to agony.

That wasn’t the plan at all. He didn’t want wet eyes, no, no…wrong part of her delicious body entirely. Three more controlled slaps and the vampire was satisfied with the result- now onto pure pleasure.

Sliding his cool palm over the now-trembling firm, satiny flesh, Angel/us ignored the brunette’s rare whimpering sound and dipped his thick fingers along the crease in her amazing ass; Cordy’s hips jerked up as they followed the thin strap of the thong she wore, shuddering when the pads of his fingers brushed lower and ran across the rapidly dampening triangle that covered her heat- then he yelped.

The little firebrand had sunk her teeth into his thigh at the same time pushing up on her hands, taking advantage of his temporary loosened grip on her. Twisting on his lap, Cordy fell to the side and landed on her butt- ouch! – But gottarungottarun was the prominent thought in her dazed head right at that moment- and damn that vampire for making her wetter than an English Summer!

“Now that wasn’t very smart,” her back hitting his mattress and the accompanying cool, heavy blanket that pinned her in place made her gulp out loud. Crap! “Since you like biting so much, let’s play tit for tat.” Before Cordy could think of a reply, Angel/us had scooted down; pulled apart her legs and sank his newly emerged fangs deep into her inner thigh.

“Yeoww-oooohhhh,” pain to pleasure in one easy step. After the initial sharp pain, the pressured drawing of his cool mouth as he sucked her lifeblood from the her femoral artery was totally erotic, and it took a second for her to realize it was her making that weird keening sound.

All that was missing from this scenario was a little titillation an inch or so above; those large hands curling round the front of her upper thighs keeping her quivering limbs apart stayed put, and the only touching beside that wicked mouth wrapped like a seal against her flesh was the teasing brush of his silky hair against her rapidly heating mound.

Far too soon, his tit for tat was over and his large body lifted to loom over her, his heavy thighs caging her hips and palms flat either side of her dazed head. Angel/us’ eyes roamed her face even as his pink tongue slipped out to lap up the small drop of blood that clung to the corner of his mouth- her blood! His face had slid back to human, but those sinful eyes still held a tinge of amber as they finally locked on her slightly open, panting mouth- then he dipped his dark head until their lips were almost brushing. Instantly, Cordy snapped her mouth tight closed and attempted to glare.

“I’ve always thought those luscious lips were such a waste, baby,” he flicked out his tongue and traced the seam, and Cordy cursed her traitorous mouth for it’s instant softening, grrr! “Used for smiling and yakking, when they could be wrapped around something that appreciates them,” he purred, smirking with delight when her cheeks flushed scarlet.

“And let’s not forget having them plastered to mine”, he added, licking his own until they glistened temptingly, “you didn’t think that when I kissed you before,” she reminded him a little too hoarsely for her liking, those masculine lips twisted and irritation flickered across his pale and beautiful face.

“The whiny soul was still pining after that skinny blonde bitch to enjoy it fully, remember,” the fingers resting next to her head curled into the mattress briefly before relaxing again and spreading out. “But I lapped it up no problems,” another long swipe of her lips, and then the atmosphere changed.

Shifting his hands, his fingers threaded through her glossy hair, titling her face up to his, “enough talking; Soulboy’s done more than enough of that to last a fucking lifetime,” he growled before crushing her mouth under his. He tilted her head back into the pillows until her mouth widened under his.

HolyMaryMotherofChrist! Could that vampire kiss! His taste, even with the hint of her coppery blood, was addictive and Cordy found herself giving back as much as he was taking, and when he finally lifted his dark head, she could truthfully admit to seeing stars- though that could be partly due to almost passing out from lack of oxygen.

Angelus licked his lips with pleasure. While his demon wanted to get straight to the fucking till she couldn’t walk for a week, the soul nudged at him from the recesses begging for major foreplay. His mouth quirked; so much for that whiny irritation demanding he stopped- frikken hypocrite, instead it wanted in on the action.

Propping himself up on his elbows, the vampire’s amber-tinged eyes swept her torso with appreciation, he had to admit, Cordelia Chase had a body that was well worth exploring.

Cordy’s dazed eyes snapped open with a gasp when her beautiful bra bit the dust in an irreparable way. God, it had a frikken front fastening!– then all coherent thought went out the window when a cool wet mouth surrounded one exposed peak.

“I should punish you for hiding these delicious treasures, baby,” Angel/us purred with a hint of dark promise in his eyes, releasing her aching nipple with a soft pop. That chastising look pulled her out of the mist of lust.

“Angel, please think about this- what you’re doing,” he looked directly into Cordy’s eyes, and for a moment she could have sworn she saw a hint of conflict- then his gaze cleared and a deeply sensual smile curved that gorgeous mouth.

“I am thinking about it,” he assured her seductively, “especially about what I’m doing- and what I’m gonna do,” he added, dipping his head to nip one of her tight nubs sharply, causing a shocked yelp to escape her. A large cool hand snaked along her front and cupped over her damp mound, squeezing and molding the pliant hot flesh beneath the silk of her thong, whilst his other hand palmed a heavy breast with a firm, experienced touch.

Something had obviously happened when they got to the Bronze, but for the life of her, Cordy was unable to think clearly; the thought ‘spell’ went through her dazed head, then physical sensation took over as her thong went the way of her bra and his cool fingers hit pay dirt.

After circling her clit until her hips bucked, Angel/us slid his fingers further down, his own excitement going through the roof. If it weren’t for that pesky soul, his throbbing cock would now be fucking her into the mattress- but surprisingly, part of his demon was actually enjoying pleasuring the writhing brunette pinned under his body.

His hard mouth widened into a self-satisfied grin when her hips lifted off the bed as two of his fingers speared her core hard, and after listening to her keen for a few seconds, he dipped his head and ravaged her parted mouth; God, she was so warm and tasted delicious. Any shred of a struggle had melted away, and after thoroughly manipulating her sensitive spot inside until she was writhing in the throes of a soaring climax, Angel/us withdrew his fingers and position his throbbing, achingly hard cock at her dewed entrance.

Despite the orgasm, Cordy’s whole body tensed at his initial penetration; it had been a long time since Wilson Christopher, and Angel/us was no lightweight in the penis department. Her eyes widened when instead of plunging to the hilt, the crazy vampire eased in, giving her body time to get accustomed to his invasion. Slowly her body opened to his- and then as if the tight clenching of her muscles was too much on his sensitive shaft, the pace picked up and the pounding began.

Stars were the order of the night; both vampire and seer panted and groaned as his hips pistoned in and out hard enough to make the back of Cordy’s head ride the pillow, and the constant flexing of her inner muscles almost made Angel/us’ amber eyes cross. Heat crawled through her body at the same time a warning tingle started and grew at the base of his spine; his pace picked up until the headboard hammered off the wall and panting turned into groans of pleasure, both reaching for that inevitable explosion.

Cordy’s back arched off the bed as the heat turned to ice and exploded through her body from her groin up to her fingertips. Her mouth parted into a soundless scream, her inner walls milking the vampire’s cock until he roared in ecstasy. His cool seed flooded her womb and he continued to pump into her convulsing body until both sagged drained and sated.

Running lax fingers through the soft hair of the head tucked into her shoulder, Cordy attempted to climb back out of oblivion- then found it not much of a problem as the vampire blanketing her tensed and practically threw himself off her. “Angel?”

It took her a few seconds, but the hands that clutched his chest as he hunched on his knees at the end of the bed triggered of warning bells- and she ran…

The Trouble With Gloating, heh

I don’t believe it- YOU!” Ethan Rayne groaned under his breath even as he turned to face the petite blonde powerhouse. Why the hell did he always have to linger and gloat? Hadn’t he learned from unpleasant experience that that bad habit never worked out well?

“I’d say it was a pleasure but I’d be lying through my perfect teeth- hey! Watch the shirt!” Ethan found himself pinned to the wall and grimaced as her hand wrinkled his fine silk shirt along with his throat.

“Oh, how wonderful; the sidekicks have arrived,” he rolled his eyes and inwardly grinned at the offended expressions on his nemesis, Rupert Giles, the redhead stick figure and the dark-haired young man whom he knew without doubt was still a complete dick- then he looked to the side, swallowed hard and was seriously glad he was human- Spike!

That’s all he bloody well needed! “Can’t a man pop into a place of fun and have a nice, quiet drink?” his eyes widened innocently as he brought his gaze back to the Slayer, inwardly irritated by the odd snikker and pitying look he got by passer’s by- him, a full grown man pinned to the wall by an innocuous little peroxide blonde.

He knew that she packed more than a punch, but those normal Joes didn’t! Oh, the shame of it.

“Why is it that I don’t believe a single, lying word you spout with so much ease?” Here we go, the great twat himself has finally decided to do his macho bit. Ethan rolled his eyes yet again and smiled sickly sweet at the ex-Watcher. Would the man ever get over that little bit of fun with the demonizing?

“Because you have gender issues? – OWWE!” he glared at the blonde with intense dislike, his fingers gingerly checked out his abused nipple. “You’ve spent far too much time with the bleached S & M bit- remind me never to smooch with you, deary,” Ethan cringed and then grinned when the ‘bleached bit’ staggered back holding his head after attempting to hammer him into the wall. HAH!

“So…. Where are Angelus and his gorgeous little pet?” Ethan made a show of looking around, but couldn’t hold in the smug grin. Buffy frowned heavily and shifted, a shiver of unease run up her spine.

“NOT Angelus, Ethan- he’s got a soul now, or hadn’t you heard?” The Slayer doubted he wouldn’t have; then the slimy bastard smiled with pure malice.

“Exchange the word ‘got’ to ‘HAD’, and you’d be closer to the lay of the land right now,” he told them with a certainty that had the color drain from their collective faces.” God, this was fun!

Figuring out that the couple had left about two hours before, it had to be a given that Angelus was back among the terrified living; he wondered absently if the vampire had killed or instead turned the lovely brunette. A real pity, but these things happen when you’re out for revenge.

“What have you done?” Buffy increased the pressure on his throat for a second, not easing until his face turned an unpleasant shade of puce. Coughing but undaunted, Ethan let another smirk slip on his face.

“And this is where I do the token muwahahaha- OUCH!- okay, I’ll tell you!” his nipples were going to need slings if the bitch continued with her mini torture. “I put a spell on this tacky little place,” he informed them with open glee.

“A unique kind of un-inhibitor especially created by my own talented hands to loosen the grip on souls belatedly placed in vampires- or should I say vampire” he hadn’t thought it possible for the little group to lose more color, but they accomplished it with ease. Ethan was on a roll and just had to share the rest of his nefarious plan- he’d always been a bit of a braggart.

“But that isn’t the coupe de grace, sweetie,” he grinned maliciously and leaned his head forward. “A diluted Angelus left this drinking establishment around two hours ago, and I don’t doubt he aided the soul on its way to the ether- what with his lusty feelings towards a certain curvy brunette,” His emphasis on the ‘Curvy’ as his eyes swept her figure had Buffy’s eyes narrowing and had her resisting the urge to pound that smug face, then did a double take. A small, condescending grin appeared on her face.

“Has to be perfect bliss, bucko; got him together with the wrong girl.” She informed him triumphantly, ignoring the disbelieving snort that left the blonde vampire. Ethan snorted too.

“Purlease! That is where you’re very wrong, my dear little narcissus; Angel AND Angelus want that little lady so much he’d give his right arm for even one night in her arms.” Spike nodded and shot a look of jealousy at the Slayer who now looked like she’d been sucker punched.

“Get over yerself, Slayer; didn’t tonight tell you anything? I know I’m blonde too, but God help the rest of us with people like you around.” He muttered not so under his unneeded breath- then the smirk slipped off his pale face as the full import of the Dark Magician’s words finally filtered through.

Shit! Spike didn’t know whether to laugh or run for the hills; Angelus is one wanker he never wanted to cross paths with again- and not just because he’d betrayed him to the slayer a few years back! He’d been all over his bit like a rash, and he knew Angelus enough to know that the girl probably would be having trouble sitting down for a while- God knows what he’d do to him! Maybe put his nuts through a spin wash, youch!

Buffy was too busy inwardly freaking too; the insinuation of Angel/us and the brunette didn’t hurt as much as she’d thought it would- but that wasn’t the reason for her heavily thudding heart. The soulless demon back in the picture? Every nightmare she’d ever had felt like they were bursting to the surface.

“We need to get over there,” she spoke half to herself; inwardly agreeing when Ethan said they’d be too late. “Will?” she turned her fair head towards the quivering redheaded witch standing a few feet behind her. Shifting her feet, the other girl raised anxious eyes and gulped.

“Um…. we kinda, um, lost the-the Restoration spell; remember Graduation? It went all kaplooey,” as if they could possibly forget. The Slayer’s shoulders slumped.

That meant they were left with only one choice- staking the vampire and losing Angel forever- along with Cordelia if he’d killed/turned her. Could her night get any worse?

“Could I make a suggestion?” Ethan saw a way out of his predicament and grabbed it with both hands. All eyes turned to him, and he smiled unpleasantly, “well, not exactly a suggestion; more like a deal?” Buffy looked towards the others then stepped a little closer.

“Spit it out,” her words short and to the point. She doubted the bastard had anything to barter, but desperation is just that.

“I picked up a very interesting Gypsy spell on my travels…a very rare soul binding spell” now he had everyone’s complete attention. “Apparently, it was an alternative to the original spell.  Alternative as in having no pesky clauses,” he revealed with a smug grin.

“And this is where you tell us the conditions, I assume?” Giles eyed the man suspiciously, not trusting him as far as he could throw Big Ben.

“How astute of you, dear Rupert,” Ethan drawled, keeping his gaze on the hopeful slayer. “Let me go and it’s all yours” you can pop it back in without having to even move from this building,” he tapped his head, the grin growing by quick degrees. “Always had an super memory; as Rupert is all too aware.” Buffy scowled; dropping the hands she was just going to search him painfully with.

“No way are you going anywhere until we know it’s worked,” she finally spoke and ignored the instant gasp that left her Watcher’s mouth.

“Why should I trust you?” Ethan returned with a lift of a dark brow.

“Because I’m giving you the word of the Slayer.” He couldn’t argue with that. The young woman may be irritatingly juvenile and whiny in many ways, but at the same time he didn’t doubt her sincerity.

“Buffy, you cannot possibly be serious! The man is a menace to society,” Giles finally opened his mouth to argue. Buffy instantly turned to him with hard green eyes.

“True, but who would you prefer roaming free, Giles- this pathetic waste of space, or pure, undiluted Angelus?” the man backed down without another word.

“Okay, toady, let’s get to it.”…

Hide and Eat…

Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete

Monster Mash   Leave a comment

Title: Let’s Do the Monster Mash         Monster Mash              
Author: Califi
Posted: 15/May/04
Rating: R/N-18 for language and graphic smut
Category: Humor and smut (and an itsy bit o’ angst)
Content: C/A….just read it, lol
Summary: C/A get invited to a special Halloween bash at the Bronze- SunnyHell, and it goes downhill from there when an old enemy gets in on the action!
Spoilers: None: AtS early S2 timeline.
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Notes: Challenge fic given me by Scorchy [grrr, she is a terror!].NOTES 2: Originally, I said I wouldn’t do it unless Scorch did the smut…but then I decided to try it myself *wibble* so it won’t be anywhere near as hot, but WTH, lol. Hope you enjoy it- and thanks so much for the challenge Scorchy; big licks and other things I can’t type here
Thanks/Dedication:Wonderful ficpic created by Lysa! To Helen for betaring for me- so glad to have the little minx back!- and also she guested in the last part and made it a helluva better fic than it woulda been.- mwah!
Scorchy Challenge: at bottom of page.
Feedback: Pretty please.

Part 1

Please Tell Me I Didn’t…!

“I can’t believe I agreed to this,” Cordy mumbled into the hand that partly covered her mouth as she propped up her chin at her desk. Angel merely rolled his eyes in a disconcerting fashion and continued to sift through the post at the check-in counter.

“Why did I let you talk me into it?” she whined a little louder, hiding the little grin when his dark head finally shot up to pin her with an annoyed glare.

“Why did I… you really kill me sometimes, you know that?” his firm mouth tightened for a second before he again dropped his head to the post. The grin spread wickedly.

“Only sometimes? Wow, I must be slipping in my old age- and jeez; stop rolling your eyes, for chrissakes,” she snarked lightly, “God knows where you picked up that bad habit,” she added, rolling her eyes in exasperation.

“I’m like a sponge, I absorb everything,” Angel’s mouth tilted with amusement, which fled at her sly “I can see that, chunky,” as she eyed his ass tellingly.

He wondered idly where he’d hide her body when he finally got to that last straw. Taking a deep; at present, needed calming breath, Angel dropped the post back onto the counter and turned to walk over to her desk, slipping his hands into his pockets in an attempt to stop them throttling the little minx.

“Please Angel, please can we go? – We have SO got to go and show that lot just how hot and sexy and mature we both are now,” his deliberately falsetto voice made Cordy cringe with a mixture of eardrum pain and mortification. “Yeah, all my idea, Cor.” He grinned patronizingly.

“I do not sound like that,” she scowled, scrunching up her nose before sticking her tongue out at him. Angel resisted the urge to swoop down and capture the moist pink tip before it had a chance to slip back into her lush mouth. “Mature?” that got him another quick show and he didn’t complain at all.

“Yeah well- oh okaaay!” she grumbled, “So it was my idea to accept the damned invitation- but that was before I found out how hard it was to get a Halloween outfit three weeks before Halloween!” the grumble had turned into a grouse. He shrugged his broad shoulders casually, not getting the importance of being totally prepared.

“I’m sure you’ll find something good nearer the time,” Angel went to prop a hip on the edge of her desk when the phone rang. As he straightened up again, Cordy surprised him by practically knocking over her chair to get to it first. He watched her grab the phone on the counter with a triumphant grin towards his still half-standing figure and visibly wound down to a casual sexiness that the vampire marveled at even as he ate it up hungrily.

“Hi, Angel’s Investigations; we help the hopeless- oh, it’s you,” her mouth pouted a little as she listened to the female voice on the other end, “No, no, you fit into that category just fine- I suppose you wanna speak to Angel?” Crap. At her words, the manpire in question instantly straightened up as he realized who Cordy was talking to.

He felt really mean and petty, but the rare occasions Buffy did contact him, Angel always felt wrung out afterwards- mainly because it was always hard to slip into the instant tragic-tone of such communications. Hell, he’d left because all of that crap was seriously driving him to a new edge, even for him. Hard to believe the time would come when any kind of contact with his ex-love would end up being a trial.

Grimacing slightly Angel reached out for the phone as soon as he stood next to the brunette, surprised when she swatted his hand away as she listened with raised brows.

“Ohhhh, you want to talk to me? How…. sweet,” Cordy made a gagging motion and Angel forced a gentle warning look on his face before turning his back and letting out a little grin; then he quickened up his pace before she could possibly call him back.

Cordy leant against the counter and watched her boss skedaddle, half surprised he hadn’t loomed over her, hovering annoyingly until it was his turn to talk to his Juliet; then she was pulled back to the voice on the other end of the phone.

“What Am I wearing?” Drat! this was SO not funny! “Wellll…. umm…” Cordy wracked her brain trying to come up with something amazing, when she heard a little snort.

“You haven’t got an outfit yet?” Buffy couldn’t keep the smirk out of her voice as the silence dragged. Cordy’s eyes narrowed evilly before replying.

“I have as a matter of fact, and it is so out of this world I can’t even begin to describe it.” A self-satisfied smile spread over her face at her brainwave, adding silkily, “what about you? Got something hot and none-slayery for the big night- or are you gonna go with the whole ‘hey, I’m a slayer; whatever I wear I’m so there already?'” – Not that Target really shouts out Chick with a Killer tude”, and didn’t she know it!

Shaking off the brief twinge of self-pity at the none-designer clothes she now had to buy, she waited or Buffy to answer.

“Wellll…” now why did that sound familiar? ” Um…” Buffy wracked her brain trying to come up with something amazing- “It’s sorta this thing, with a …thing and…” she gave up on that, ‘thing’ line pretty quick.

“I just can’t describe it it’s so hot.” Silence reigned for a few seconds, and then both cleared their throats at the same time. Cordy finally looked at the non-existent watch on her wrist and gasped aloud.

“Oh, gee, would you look at the time? I really hate to do this Buffy, but I have a hair appointment in twenty minutes, so, busy, busy!” she lied through her teeth and blew out a breath of relief when the other girl bought it. “See you on the night, ‘kay?” Cordy pulled a face at the mouthpiece before both said their goodbyes and put down their phones.

“Oh God, what the hell am I gonna wear?” nearly four hours in distance separated the blonde and the brunette but their wails matched in pitch and desperation…

Hi Ho, hi ho, it’s off to the shops we go…

“I just don’t believe this!” Cordy groaned under her breath as she stared wide-eyed at the blonde gazing into the fancy dress store window, “Could my life get any more pathetic?”

Taking a silent step back, followed by another and another and….

“Cordy?” Oh, crappitycrap! Cordy pasted a smile on her face and kick-started her footsteps back to forward motion, she soon found herself face to face with an equally uncomfortable blonde slayer, who’s smile looked as fake as her own; then the brunette’s hazel eyes narrowed suspiciously before widening in unsuppressed glee.!

“You haven’t got an outfit, have you?” She crowed with unhidden delight. Buffy scowled darkly and kicked the sidewalk, scuffing one of her shiny black boots-, which weren’t that bad, the brunette thought with mild surprise.

“I so do,” Buffy returned falsely with an unblinking stare. “It’s just- well I-I washed it and…and…” the blonde struggled for a moment before adding loudly ” –the colour ran; yes! It was not a pretty sight all the black and green, not to mention the blue and red all, all…” she made a swirly movement in the air, words failing her.

“full of the brown grayness of mixed ickiness?” Cordelia added, surprisingly helpful in the girls moment of need.

“Yes! Total complete grey-brown ickiness,” her head bobbing thankfully, with a stupid grin plastered on her flushed face. Both girls cleared their throats and silence lay like a thick blanket. Then Buffy blinked. “So why are you here?” she asked all too innocently. Yeah, right! cordy thought sourly.

“Actually, I’m just shopping in a normal none-get-up capacity ‘cos, hey! I live in L.A.” And the blonde looked totally sucked in- NOT! “Cordy mentally stamped her foot and decided to come clean. “Okaaay, so I haven’t got an outfit either, happy now?” she practically growled, then surprised Buffy by snickering.

After a few seconds, the slayer joined in and soon they were both holding their bellies and howling, totally oblivious to the pitying and freaked out stares of passers by.

“So…. As we suck at bare faced lies, you got any recommendations?” Buffy finally asked, gasping a little and rubbing the stitch in her side absently. The brunette shook her head morosely.

“Nope, for once, I can honestly say I’m completely out of ideas,” Cordy sighed heavily and scowled. Both stood in silence again, but this was a silence of mutual brainstorming- then Cordy’s head snapped up, her wide mouth curled in a sly grin.

“I take that back, Buff; have I got a cool idea or what!” Buffy pursed her lips for a second, a little wary of what the other girl had in mind, but the wicked gleam in those hazel eyes sucked her in and a grin slid onto her face.

“Hit me,” she ordered in a hushed whisper.

If at first you don’t succeed… bully

“Nope, no way, nada, never in my lifetime or any others; forget it; and for chrissakes, leave me the HELL ALONE!” the two young women watched the dark vampire storm across the lobby and up the stairs silently, Then the brunette turned to the blonde.

“I bet we can change his mind in ten,” Cordy pursed her lips, grabbing the other girl’s arm and dragging her towards the stairs.

“Uh-uh- make that five,” reiterated Buffy, then stopped dead. “You’re gonna have to do this yourself; think you can?” Cordy pfft and snorted. “I’ve got a call to make- wish me luck,” with a sly wink, Buffy headed for the phone whilst Cordy sniggered evilly and ascended the stairs.

This was gonna be a piece of cake. Pinching her nose and breathing hard, moisture popped into her now doe-like eyes. Her bottom lip quivered with just the right amount of distress and pinching her cheeks into a flush of red finished the job of upset woman

“Oh, Angelllll! I need to talk to youuuu!” The loud slam of a door made them both jump before shrugging with a grin. Sniffling loudly, and knowing he’d be able to hear her clearly, Cordy traipsed up the stairs.

Buffy smirked when the phone picked up at the other end, and she turned to lean against the counter. “Hi Spike! Feel like having a little fun- NO! Not that kind of fun; get your bleached head out of the gutter, buster! – What are you doing next weekend?”…

Trick Or …Oh Yeah, Trick…

“Good God in Heaven!” Giles staggered back from the front door of the Crawford Street Mansion clutching his chest, his pupils swallowing his blue eyes, and his face the color of flour paste. BuffDar followed him rapidly with a perplexed frown on her face; she didn’t look scary did she? – Well, she wanted to be scary in a cool way, but not in a “run for your lives kinda way.

“Don’t panic Giles, I’m still all heart-beaty and loving the sun; look!” she raised her face to that warm globe in the still blue sky, adding. “I didn’t mean to scare the bejeebers out of you- I never thought to warn you,” Maybe she’d gone a little too far with the pale face powder, she thought with a slight grin; ignoring the “like that’s anything new!” from a certain brunette behind her.

She twirled and grinned triumphantly, “Anyhoo; do ya like?” she asked coyly.

Giles took in her appearance from shining blonde head to red satin-heeled covered feet, his heart gradually settling back into its original resting place. The blonde wore a scarlet sheath of a dress, held up with thin spaghetti straps, the slinky material tightly wrapped over young pert breasts before nipping into her narrow waist and hips. Her bronzed, well-muscled thighs were almost fully on display and were bare of hose, ending in matching red strappy sandals with killer four-inch heels.

“Well?” BuffDar waited anxiously with a small smile on her scarlet-coated lips, touching her well-groomed hair gingerly. Giles cleared his throat, avoiding looking too closely at the excessive white powder use that clashed dreadfully with the horrendous red lipstick and removed his glasses to begin his ritual of breathe, polish, replace. – and above all be tactful he reminded himself sternly.

“Very… racy – this is a Halloween party, Buffy, not a Vicars and Tarts ball, you do realize?” Well, he got the first three down pat. The stifled snorts behind her had her quickly swirling round to glare into the hallway of the gloomy mansion.

“Giles!” she hmphed, turning back to face the ex-Watcher, “I’m supposed to be Angel’s Sire- not a-a-Tart!” she informed him with a very sulky pout. Giles’s eyebrows rose as he mutely checked her outfit once more.

“Well, you got half of it right,” Spike’s sneering voice cut through the uncomfortable silence, followed by a muffled “Owwe! Sod off you wanker!” The slayer felt only slightly better after hearing his yelp of pain and smiled at the gobsmacked man outside.

“As you can see through those very shiny glasses, still of the light and burst into flames time of day, so come on in,” BuffDar stepped back and ushered the man into the hallway like the perfect hostess, closing the door behind her- and bumping into his back when he came to an abrupt halt.

“Good God in Heaven!” Giles repeated, ignoring the “Is that all you bloody well say, Watcher?” from an again abused bleached vampire, this time by a brunette who looked almost uncannily like….

“Druscilla…” Giles sucked in a breath. Although the stunning figure was too well developed and her face bronzed to be the frail vampire’s [thank God one of them hadn’t gone totally gothic!], her dark glossy locks and the rather dated fragile black lace ankle-length dress she wore gave an eerie affect that couldn’t be ignored or unrecognized. Cordelia Chase was a vision of old- world loveliness, and for a moment, the English man was at a loss for words.

“And I’m Spike, or William the Bloody to you- and keep yer eyes off my bird, you dirty old Ponce.” Giles rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath, but Spike still heard the word ‘dickhead’ and grinned with new respect; then he reached over to hook the brunette’s arm and pull her towards him, scowling when the dark-haired vampire beside her latched a powerful arm around her small waist and growled at him.

“Okay, keep yer ‘air on, peaches.” Spike smirked and took a conciliatory step back. This was gonna be so much fun! It took all of his self-control not to rub his hands together with glee; it was always a treat to watch his Sire squirm.

Angel, on the other hand did not like this at all. Not. One. Teensy. Little. Bit.

It wasn’t the fact that he was in Sunnydale [not really], and it wasn’t anything at all to do with the very weird truce between his ex and his hopefully potential new love, who wavered between giggling and snarking at each other – Hell, it wasn’t really even the fact that Cordy had bullied and emotionally blackmailed him into playing his evil alter ego; down to the blood red velvet silk shirt and his [he thought] well-hidden leather pants.

Nope, none of those in particular, he could take some things in his stride.

What he didn’t like about the whole scenario was the fact that SPIKE got to partner his CorDru, “Cos we gotta do it right, Angel/us” CorDru had snickered; wench! He could still hear her words earlier as she’d double-checked his appearance with a critical eye:

“No hold’s barred, Angel- except for killing/turning, buddy” Cordy straightened the seams running across his broad shoulders for the umpteenth time. “You have to BE Angelus in attitude and smoothness- which will be hard work since you got that Dorkulitus down pat”

“As long as you don’t go overboard with the craziness” he muttered, shifting as her hot little hands smoothed the soft velvet material across his chest. She finally stood back and took in his pouty mouth and dark frown.

“Look, you don’t have to do this if you really don’t want to, Angel- even though it will totally ruin my night,” she added with a slow blink geared towards making him feel a complete heel if he backed out.

“I don’t like it that you have to hang around with Spike all night,” his real grouse sneaking out. To hide the jealousy Angel turned away and folded the black silk shirt tossed carelessly on the bed by a certain untidy slob of a Seer. ” He’s evil- just remember that.” He reminded her gruffly.

“Pfft! Evil shmevil, hello? He’s got that chippie thing in his noggin- and he’s got his glad-eye on someone else,” she hinted broadly, but Angel was too worked up to notice…

“Time to go! Ooh, I’m actually excited!” Cordy bubbled with a small grin- as long as Xander Loser kept to a quick hi and moved out of range of her internal radar, she was cool. “Come on, Spikey, let’s paint the town…. any colour but red,” she added with an unabashed smile.

The blonde vampire returned the grin and wrapped a leather-clad arm round the curvy brunette, enjoying the half-stifled snarl and furious glare the dark vampire sent his way. BuffDar, oblivious, grabbed Angel/us’ arm and dragged him after the disappearing Ex-Watcher and too-hot looking couple…

Totally Bronzed off!

Angel/us growled for the hundredth time that night as he watched Spike and CorDru slow dance on the tiny club floor; God, she was draping herself like a bloody curtain all over the bleached bastard!

Since they’d arrived at the Bronze, he’d hardly spoken to his seer, who’d instantly dragged Spike off to the dance floor, where she’d gyrated around him until Angel’s teeth almost cracked from gritting them. He’d refused point blank to dance with BuffDar and instead found a dark corner to hide in and sulk, but sadly, the blonde had soon found him again and unusually (and scarily!) chattered on like a none-stop freight train.

He itched and twitched, and felt antsy, but put it down to being surrounded by too many humans- and the Scoobie Gang who still pissed him off. As the night wore on, Angel/us found it more and more difficult to even answer his partner for the night with even monosyllabic words, and when he did, his tone became more acid and unpleasant.

BuffDar eventually left him to it for an hour and caught up with Xander and Willow, throwing annoyed glances at the silently fuming vampire, and even more annoyed glares towards the couple bopping away on the tiny dance floor looking like they were having a whale of a time.

Finally fed up with the way things were turning out, she made her way back to Angel/us’ side and tugged at his sleeve.

“Angel! You’re supposed to be MY partner,” BuffDar complained. “Stop staring and being all growly- you should be acting in character” she added bitterly, never thinking she’d EVER ask him to act like the soulless demon he kept tight under his pale skin.

All she got for her trouble was a careless shrug and a bare flicker of a glance, before his glowering eyes went back to the other couple. She’d never felt so neglected as she did right now- plus SHE wasn’t too keen on CorDru and Spike’s over-acting either; talk about hamming it- bitch!

“Remember Darla, your Sire? At least act like you would if she was here by your side,” BuffDar tried again, her voice hardening a little at his continued dark silence.

Angel/us turned his head abruptly to growl, “I am! – I hated the little bitch!” He spat venomously, causing BuffDar to gasp aloud at his unheard-of crudity, but Angel/us continued on heedless of her reaction.

“I spent most of my time snatching Dru and keeping her in my room for days; the things we did…” he sighed lustily, completing forgetting the glaring blonde at his side as he literally ate Cor/Dru with his darkening eyes.

BuffDar tightened her mouth into a hard line and stamped her foot. When that didn’t work, she reached out and pinched his arm- hard. “Owwe!” he dragged his eyes from CorDru and glared at the small blonde bitch.

“Don’t do that again, little girl,” he growled low in his throat, and her brow lifted challengingly at the veiled threat in those now amber ringed eyes. “Whatcha gonna do? Spank me?” Rather than punch his scowly face, she instead attempted to lighten the atmosphere between them. He instantly shook his head, lip curling slightly.

“No!” in a tone that had her back stiffening “- but Cor’s gonna get a more than a few if she doesn’t stop climbing all over Spike,” the growl turned into a snarl. The Slayer’s spidey senses kicked off as she watched him for a moment, unease crawling through her gut. Bad, BAD memories!

“Angel….” BuffDar paused as the tingle grew and hit her spine, “Are you, you know, okay?” she tugged on his sleeve to get his attention that was again firmly fixed on his seer, the scowl deepening on his handsome face. He reluctantly looked back down at the Slayer. “What?” his tone more than a little irritated now.

She blew out a calming breath and fidgeted under his glare; she really hated it when his eyes flickered all vampy-like. It reminded her of the part of him she had never been able to accept.

“It’s just that you seem to be taking this Angelus gig way too seriously,” she let out a slightly uncomfortable giggle when he continued to stare at her, his expression blanking out without bothering to reply. This was definitely not of the good as far as the Slayer was concerned, and the memories almost flooded her mind to the point of real pain and distrust. She didn’t like it one little bit!

Angel/us’ large body jerked as her words sunk in.

Thinking about it, he had to admit that his demon seemed to be drawing closer and closer to the surface since they’d arrived at the Bronze…. the evil thoughts flitting through his mind almost felt like old times; not so good times. Times when the soul was not even a twinkle in his evil eye- the only thing missing was the urge to kill [except when it came to his blonde childer, that is!] and really, at this moment he should have been seriously worried. But even that seemed too much of an effort, because he just couldn’t seem to care.

He finally shrugged and yet again turned away from the blonde, locking feral eyes back on the other ‘couple’. Angel/us swore down that If CorDru waved and yelled ‘Hi, Daddy’ one more time, he was going to throttle that woman -after he’d shown her fatherly thoughts were so far from his mind, they were on another planet entirely. His face was one big thunderous scowl- and when CorDru’s hand brushed the bleached vampire’s thigh, Angel/us lost it completely and snarled, his game face flickering on and off like a faulty light-bulb.

“That is it! They need a fucking lesson in who belongs to me!” He pulled away from the restraining hand of the dumbfounded slayer and stalked over, drawing his fist back even as his feet ate up the distance between him and the oblivious couple.

CorDru’s hazel eyes widened in shock as she glanced up in time to see Angel/us within feet of them.  Uh-oh!

“Spike”! I think-“, was all she had chance to utter before the blonde looked at her and followed her anxious gaze- and Angel/us’ fist connected with his face. “Angel’s freaking out,” she ending with a stunned gasp.

“You’re forgetting who’s the Master here, boy. Keep your hands off my woman,” Angel/us snarled down at the heap of leather and blonde hair on the floor, totally oblivious to the sudden silence on the dance floor as he grabbed hold of one of CorDru’s arms and practically dragged her towards the exit

“Angel- hold up there, buddy!” It took all of his self-control not to reach out a snap the neck of the small blonde that suddenly appeared, blocking his way and staring up at him with a mixture of confusion and warning.

“Not now, Buff,” Angel/us; large powerful body oozed restrained violence, causing the slayer to instinctively take a step back and tense ready for battle.

“Tough cookies. You’re gonna listen to me whether you like it or not,” she returned with cold determination and green eyes glinting with steel. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” she gritted out between clenched teeth.

CorDru nodded her head rapidly even as she tugged at her arm and glared angrily at the dark vampire. “Yeah, Rambo, listen to the nice lady and get a frikkin’ grip!” Flicking a silencing look at the feisty brunette, Angel/us straightened to his full height, giving his seer a quick yank until she stumbled against his side, then turned his head back to Buff-suddenly-not-Dar.

“Hurry up and say what you gotta say Slayer, I have….” he glanced back down at the brunette who had recovered balance and was at present pinching every inch of his flesh that she could, really hard. “…Things to do- And-” he grabbed Cor’s hand for a second with a warning growl, “most definitely someone to punish if she doesn’t cut that out” he added just loud enough for the brunette to hear.

Cor gaped like a goldfish and stiffened. What the hell was wrong with the big dork? He was taking this whole Halloween gig way too seriously for her liking, and if she hadn’t known otherwise, she’d have thought….

“A-Angel?” she caught his hard gaze, her heart thumping heavily in her chest, literally sagging with relief when those golden irises suddenly softened into a warm brown.

“Still me, Cor. Just doing what you asked, don’t fret.” his equally tight mouth softened too, quirking at the edges before lifting his head and facing the confused/angry Slayer

“Look; I’m really Sorry, Buffy, I sorta got into the moment a bit too much. It could also be because I haven’t eaten all day,” Angel/us inwardly smirked at her uncontrollable grimace of distaste at his last words. “Hunger makes me a little antsy,” he added with faint apology in his now-warm brown eyes. Buffy relaxed a little, an awkward smile fleetingly touching her scarlet mouth. As he watched the blonde slowly relax, Angel/us mentally patted himself on the back; humans were so easy!

“Owwe!” his dark head darted low at the hard, stinging slap across his chest and found a pair of annoyed hazel eyes glaring at him. What was it with women always hitting him? Shouldn’t it be him that was in control here? He calmed at the knowledge that the fiery brunette would soon find out who was actually the boss in this relationship.

“You haven’t eaten all day?” her lethal narrowed eyes tore from his with a ‘pfft’ of irritation and turned instead to look at the fidgeting Slayer with a roll of her eyes. “We’re gonna go back to the mansion and get Dieting Dorkula fed, ‘kay?” Buffy finally nodded and stepped out of the way.

“Come on, Skippy; Jeez, I can’t leave you to do anything for yourself, can I? So much for getting some in fresh this morning!” she grumbled, her hand now dragging him out of the club. Angel looked suitably cowed and followed with a dramatic pout.

“I can too do stuff for myself,” he grumbled back, hiding the smirk as his darkening eyes traced the firm outline of her ass as she dragged him behind her. Cordy rolled her eyes again and released his arm, walking ahead to reach the Plymouth.

“Hand them over,” Angel/us reached her side and stared at her small-outstretched hand. She had to be kidding him!

“You’re not driving my car, Cordy,” his dark head shaking his refusal. Her fingers merely wriggled under his nose. He resisted the urge to grab it and tie it behind her back along with the other- that could wait too, he decided with real relish.

“Yeah right, as if I’m gonna let you drive and maybe pass out at the wheel with hunger! – I think not” Angel batted away her annoying hand and man handled her towards the passenger seat.

“The only thing that would make me possibly pass out is the sound of you crucifying my transmission,” he returned, practically shoving her into the seat and shutting the door with a firm snap, stifling the growl at the image he got of what else she would most likely ‘crucify’ later!

Climbing into the car, Angel/us ignored her snarky response and squealed out of the car lot, neither noticing the dark shadow that peeled itself away from a nearby alley wall and stepped into the street.

Ethan Rayne grinned even as he rubbed his hands together.

The spell he’d woven over the Bronze was working a treat, and if all went to plan, Angelus would be back in action well before dawn- the undiluted version sans soul, that is.

“God, I just love Halloween.” He almost giggled before stupidly deciding to sneak into the Bronze and see how the party was going…

Part 2

Scorchy Challenge: her wants were….1: C/A get invited to a Halloween party by the SG at the Bronze.**2: C /B argue via phone over who’s got the best outfit- then both run shopping frantically. **3: They bump into each other, and after a bit of bitchy snark, decide to shop together and go for a theme. **4: They ask/bully Spike/Angel into partnering their Darla/Dr u’s –Spike to be his meanest; and Angel HAS to dress/act like Angelus-sans murdering and pillaging, lol. ** Anything else is just thrown in by moi in an attempt to build a plot, heh, as I’m practicing! Note: originally Scorch wanted B/C to go as S/A, but then we thought it would be cooler if they went as D/D.

Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete

Made to Order Epi   Leave a comment

Epilogue:  A Touching Moment

Angel couldn’t believe it! His Seer- *his woman* lay prone on her bed; elbows out with her hands tucked under her upper chest, her long exquisite legs stretched out – completely naked and receiving a massage that, to his raging mind, was just this side of decent.

His robot look-alike worked silently with firm, soothing strokes, wearing only a pair of black boxers. From the looks of the Bot’s expertise it had obviously been programmed as a Grande Masseur- and Angel felt intense relief at the calm assurance from Fred that the thing touching his Cordy was at least limited to *that*.

But it was still *way* too much, he thought with a stifled snarl. The foot thing had been a bad enough shock to his possessive streak that was more than a mile wide!

Before Angel could react with his surging need for a much-patented violent response, the Bot straightened up and informed the relaxed beauty that more oil was needed. The endearment ‘Baby’ nearly had him jumping on its back and whooping it’s ass into scrap metal.

The Vampire contained himself with iron [HAH!] control, instead retreating stealthily before the clone could turn around, and then hid out of sight. As soon as the inferior piece of shite metal entered the kitchen, he made his move. Grabbing the ‘Angelbot’ in a headlock, Angel reached for the de-activation switch Fred had told him about between the shoulder blades. Instantly the Bot sagged forward.

After propping it up against the wall near the door, Angel ran through his options feverishly…a wicked smile finally curling his mouth as he stripped to his boxers, grateful that they too were black- but no way was he swapping them with the Bot’s tiger motifs! Uh-huh!

He paused on his way out, rolled his eyes and walked back over to the inactive bot. With a face filled with disgust, he pulled the waistband of its boxers out and checked, cringing; then sighed with relief to find Fred had told the truth about that too!

Cordy wants a massage? Then she’ll get one she won’t forget in a hurry” he muttered under his breath as he made his way back to her bedroom.

For a few seconds he just stood at the foot of the bed the heat in his eyes reaching out and lapping at her golden skin.

“You got the oil?” Cordy glanced over her shoulder with a slight frown, wondering why her scrumptious Bot hadn’t continued with her massage on entering the room. It rarely stood around once given a ‘task’.

Her frown deepened for a moment when she glanced at his eyes, then relaxed when the gold-tinge blinked out, leaving its usual blank brown irises behind.

“Must be the light, she murmured to herself, shrugging lightly and settling back down, too relaxed to notice the absence of a certain ‘tiger’.

Angel released the held unneeded breath with silent relief when the split-second look of uncertainty disappeared from her beautiful face as she turned away.

His whole body buzzed with anticipation as he loomed over her, reaching for a delicate foot. She moaned softly in approval when he proceeded to knead her flesh with complete concentration. A small warning light went off in her brain at the subtle change in the bot’s touch, but it didn’t register in her conscious mind enough to alert her.

As his hands followed the sensual lines of her satiny legs, Angel bit back a growl of intense pleasure. He couldn’t believe he was actually touching her like this- and getting away with it, he thought smugly.

The times he’d fantasised about caressing every inch of her were too many to count, and as he pressed the tips of his fingers gently into the well-toned calves, he absently wondered how much he’d be able to touch before she rumbled him.

Shrugging his shoulders fatalistically, Angel moved around the bed to settle down next to her hip, keeping his hands on the backs of her knees. Glancing furtively at her face that was turned towards him, and seeing her eyes closed, the wicked smile that graced his masculine lips widened as he upped the anti.

Spreading out his hands, he let his hard fingers slide inwards; kneading firmly and at the same time easing those gorgeous legs apart. After succeeding in gaining another fraction of space, Cordy clocked him and tensed immediately.

Angelbot, honey; NOT the inner thigh – we DID go over the what-not -to- touch list, remember?” Cordy stiffened a little as those cool hands continued to knead her just above the knee; creeping up inch by slow inch higher; and applying slight pressure as he went along, causing her legs to part a little more.

She attempted to press her thighs closer together, determined to ignore the heat shooting through her loins, but the bot refused to let her, keeping her legs where he wanted with delicious ease. The one thing she could be thankful for was, given his present position next to her, he at least didn’t have a bird’s eyes view- but just the thought of being so vulnerably open; and with the added image in her mind of the Real Angel doing this to her had hot moisture surging through her core.

Dear God! She may want Angel with a desperation that bordered on obsessive nymphomania – but there was no way in HELL those plastic-clad metal fingers were going anywhere near there!

Angel’s nostrils flared excitedly as the hot scent of her arousal surrounded him, shaking his head roughly to clear it, he forcibly pushed aside the urge to bury his greedy fingers deep into her body. If he was wrong about this, *that* action would be totally unforgivable.

“Just relax, sweetheart; I only want to please you.” Angel smirked widely at her growing discomfort. He resisted the temptation to watch the path his bold fingers were taking and instead leaned over her supine form until his mouth brushed her ear.

“Am I pleasing you, *baby*?” he whispered huskily – and her head jerked up as she caught his eyes. Instead of emotionless brown orbs, her gaze was drawn into very hot, melting chocolatey goodness – with a hint of wicked humour and deep hunger.

“Oh, Fuck!” Angel sniggered at her panicked exclamation, and almost laughed out loud when she went to rise, then thought better of it.

“If you ask nicely, my sweet.” he purred, his large hands now at the juncture of her thighs, his fingers lightly brushing against her soft curls. He growled low in his throat at the sizzling moisture that immediately slicked the pads, even whilst a part of his mind screamed out for him to stop before he went too far.

Cordy froze. She was naked on her bed. She was naked on her bed with the real, flesh and blood Angel looming over her. She was naked on her bed with the real, flesh and blood Angel looming over her with his fingers skimming over there! She nearly came on the spot!

“Just stop right there, Mister!” Hot shock quickly replaced by semi-outrage as she clenched her thighs; squeaking sharply when instead of getting rid of his invading hand, she’d trapped it and unintentionally forced his cool flesh against her hot, slick folds – but at least those devilish fingers had stilled she thought with a mixture of mild relief – and major disappointment; or they’d have probably been on the inside by now!

She gulped, her body releasing yet more liquid arousal at the thought. Dammit! Why did I have to go and spoil it? She groaned silently.

Angel shuddered at the hot sensation of her slick petalled flesh pressed against his trembling fingers. His whole body tightened as he imagined ‘other’ parts of his anatomy that close!

“What’s wrong, Baby? *Both* of us aren’t human- so what does it matter *who* touches you?” Angel couldn’t keep the low growl of jealousy accompanying his words.

A fucking robot gets to touch the woman of his many erotic dreams and fantasies, and he’d now been told to keep his hands off? – no fucking way! With that thought in mind, he boldly reached out his other hand to smooth the soft flesh that had pressed out at the chest between her body and the mattress. He groaned silently: her skin felt like velvet satin.

“There’s a big difference between an innocent massage and pervy hands copping a feel, Angel!”

“Innocent? You call lying on your bed in all you’re delicious glory innocent? Come on, Cordy; would a *towel* have hurt?” this time he didn’t even try to suppress the growl of discontent.

Delicious? Her heartbeat accelerated at his choice of word.

“If you don’t remove your hands, I Will- and it involves detaching them from the wrists, Mister grabby” It was Cordy’s turn to growl- although it came out more of a breathless moan.

“And anyway, its not like Cloney-guy is bothered by my-my birthday suit – and there has *never* been any of the touching *you* are doing!” she continued huskily, her colour heightened as he reluctantly slipped his hand from between her thighs; but not before running his thick fingers along her delicate folds first.

Yep!- Definitely a Perv; her cheeks flushed even more as she bit back a groan of pleasure.

Angel heard the revealing sound, and, by the way her honeyed juices slicked his fingers, his Seer was far from put off by his ‘touching’! That boosted both his ego and his confidence. Having got this far, leaving her untouched was the furthest from his mind. He dipped his head, letting his lips skate the exposed flesh of her nape.

“Why me?” Angel whispered against her skin sensually, darting out the tip of his tongue and lathing the spot he’d brushed soft kisses against.

He really needed Fred’s assurances to be right- if she *was* wrong then he’d been seriously out of order, and knew, without a doubt [unfortunately!] that if Cordy decided as a punishment that he became a literal eunuch, he’d consider it.

“W-what?” Cordy stuttered, trying not to push into his cool, worshipping mouth with great difficulty.

“Of all the men you could have chosen to be your sex slave- why chose *my* likeness, Cordy?” Pleasesayitpleasesayitpleasesayit!

He’s *not* my sex slave! – Jeez -what do you take me for? Can I just say *Ewwwe?*” she returned horrified- deliberately evading answering his original question, and hoping he’d not notice.

No such luck.

“Okay: All-round Masseur and whatever else it does- but you still haven’t answered my question” feeling braver, he now nipped lightly at her nape, soothing the slight pinches with a more aggressive tongue.

His sex tightened and jumped when the beauty below him shuddered deliciously.

H-he was – the runt of the litter?” she half moaned out the lie, “No one else was interested in the poor thing, so I was merely… taking pity on him?” Her body squirmed pleasurably as his hands again began kneading her betraying flesh.

“Try again, sweetheart.” Angel upped his gentle assault, hands squeezing and manipulating her shoulders and spine, running lower and massaging her ass with deep, lazy strokes.

Words failed her. Having the flesh and blood version of her hot fantasies touching her bare flesh overloaded her already shot system – she cracked.

“It was better than nothing at all.” As soon as the words slipped out, Cordy froze.

Oh, CrappityCrappityCrap! Did she just say what she thought she’d said? Turning her face into the soft pillow, she died of mortification.

Angel felt his undead heart clench in joy at her admittance- and thanked the Powers that soul lossage was no longer a factor. He slid his hands up and circled her small waist, pressing his calloused fingertips into her warm skin rhythmically.

Cordy; you only had to ask; I’m all yours, baby – for as long as you want me.” The emotion behind his words rocked her mind, and her head shot round to face him in shock.

As he read the answering love in her eyes, Angel flipped her onto her back, all earlier hesitation completely disappearing. After holding her melting gaze a little longer, he finally swept heated darkened eyes down her golden body, almost gasping with delight at the perfection that was his woman. Then settled his long powerful frame over her, tucking her warm body under his cooler one.

After several long, smouldering seconds of holding her molten gaze with his burning dark one, he braced himself on both arms and lifted up, causing their loins to mould together like the proverbial yin and yang.

“Now, about this massage; where do you want me to start?” At her moaning giggle, Angel proceeded to thrust and surge ever so gently over her, rubbing her body with his in a mind-blowing all over massage that had her entire body clenching with excitement.

As soon as the words were out of his mouth he felt those long lithe legs wrap around his waist and both of her hands push at his shoulders. Reluctantly obedient he rolled over and then found himself, to his extreme delight draped instantly by her very warm body as that hot little mouth latched to his throat.

“You just lay there, big guy” and she meant that in more ways than one after seeing the evidence of his desire, “Cos its way past my turn” Angel groaned helplessly as his Seer went on to worship every well-muscled inch of him.

FIN. ~ Thanks for the challenge, Hely, mwah!


Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete

Made to Order   Leave a comment

Title: Made to Order
Author: Califi
Rating: N-17-ish
Category: Raunchy humour/fluff [what else?]
Content: C/A.
Summary: Fred gets Cordy a special present.
Spoilers: S3 pre Darla, post-buffy alive again
Disclaimer: The characters in the Angelverse were created by Joss Whedon & David Greenwalt. No infringement is intended, no profit is made.
Notes: I found this in my fic folder half complete-…so finished it, finally, lol. fluffy smutty…fluff, with humor (hopefully)
Thanks/Dedication:Challenge given via pm by Helen, then I forgot about it *oops* hope you enjoy it babes. Mwah!
Feedback:would be great!

Part 1

News is News is News

“You’re kidding, right? – There isn’t going to be a punch line or a ‘but’ is there?” Angel’s voice wavered slightly, and he cleared his throat and looked away from the Ex-Watcher who he realllly wanted to kiss right now!

Nope, he hadn’t decided that after centuries of worshipping the female form that he wanted to bat for the other team- not at all. But this wonderful thing the man had done for him; well, words just didn’t seem adequate!

“I’m pleased to say, there is no ‘but’ – and definitely not kidding, Angel. You were right to tell me about feeling ‘different’ since that episode with that old man from the Retirement home. The artefact used to swap bodies indeed did give you a great gift.” Wes leaned forward excitedly.

“The act of your essence switching with his could have ripped your tenuous soul from you under normal circumstances – but the deep, ancient magic surrounding that urn not only held it in place, but super glued it to you too.” He grinned with excitement.

“The connotations are well worth researching further, in fact I-” Angel reached out a hand and patted the man’s shoulder with a raised brow that stopped the ramblings mid-flow.

“Yes, well; suffice to say, the threat of Angelus is no longer a worry – the others will be so pleased for you- ” before the vampire could stop him, Wes had left the office and rounded up the others.

“Damnit!” Angel had a plan of action to work out first – but it was too late now, he stifled a growl and rose to his feet.

“Angel! I’m so pleased for you!” within seconds of him exiting the office, a soft, warm, and deliciously curvy body wrapped around his cool frame.

Before he had a chance to relish the feeling, the warmth receded rapidly as Cordy stepped back, and was quickly replaced with a no less warm, but much slighter body; thin arms squeezing his neck tightly then releasing him just as quickly.

“Are we gonna celebrate?” Fred’s eyes sparkled with excitement, grinning as Gunn entered the fray, shaking Angel’s hand firmly and looking just as excited!

“Can’t say I’m sorry I won’t get to meet the evil dude,” a wide grin splitting his dark face.

By the time congratulations were over, everyone was sitting on the couches. Angel couldn’t help feeling peeved to find his Seer sandwiched between Gunn and Fred, and he reluctantly joined Wes on the other couch.

He noted that, although still smiling broadly, a shadow touched her beautiful eyes, and she wouldn’t quite meet his gaze.

“Cordy? Is something wrong?” Wes asked softly; he’d noticed too.

“What? Me? – nooo; well….” A wide range of emotions flitted across her lovely face as she glanced at first Wes, then Angel, before dropping her eyes to the hands twisting in her lap. Silence pervaded the room as everyone watched the Seer who was obviously having some sort of inner struggle.

“When will you be; you know – leaving?” worry quickly melted to surprise, as they continued to stare mutely at her.

“Excuse me?” was all Angel could manage. What the hell was she going on about? Cordy shifted in her seat awkwardly, her mouth opening and closing a few times, then her eyes again skittered to her hands; this time seemingly checking her nails.

“You know, Angel- Sunnydale; Buffy.” She blurted it out hurriedly, then all eyes turned to the stunned vampire as they penny finally dropped.

Angel rose to his feet, his darkening eyes resting on the bent head of his best friend. Surely she didn’t believe…after all they’d; noooo, she couldn’t! – could she?

“I-I’ve no intention of going anywhere, Cordy.” He replied quietly. “You- everyone here… I’m not leaving my family.” he smiled faintly, glancing at the others, who nodded, relaxing.

He walked a few steps forward until less than a foot away from the sitting brunette. ” Sunnydale is my past, as is Buffy. You already knew that.” Angel added softly.

“Actually no, I didn’t” her voice equally as soft. Then she stood up abruptly, a smile pinned to her face, “So, Caritas tonight? Or are we just gonna do our usual – uhhhhgnn!” Angel caught her before she could hit the hard floor.


Cordy half listened to Fred’s prattle as she recalled the scenes following her vision. All talk of celebrations – and Sunnydale; and the ‘B’ word were pushed aside as they readied themselves to fight the latest ugly to decide that it would be fun to eat a handful of Los Angeles’ residents, Angel had held on to her longer than he needed, which made for more awkwardness as she pushed him away; softening her abrupt action with a bright, pain-edged smile. Even as he released her, she had a feeling their ‘conversation’ was far from over.

Yeah, like I really wanna take *that* trip down memory lane! she thought morosely. Then Freds words sunk into her brain.

“And when he said he built robot sex toys for guys all over, I thought he was joking- but no; he sent me some pictures in an email to show me, They were so life-like too-“

“Woah! Fred. Rewind that a bit, would ya? – Robot sex toys?” The physicist nodded with a cheeky grin all over her face, adding:

“Well, not just for that – he can program them to do whatever you want! – And they just give him a photo and he creates the exact likeness of whoever they want.! A bit creepy and yucky, ya know; wanting one to, um do things with, don’t ya think? I mean, if I was to have one, I’d rather they did something less…”

“Ewwey?” Cordy suggested, agreeing wholeheartedly. Fred nodded. For a long moment, both were lost in thought at the pretty nasty visuals they got from that information.

“Massage would be good though” Cordy murmured to herself. “-Obviously, not the invasive ‘parlour’ type, naturally” she added hastily; cos that would be….definitely ‘ewwwey’!

“Who would you – if you ever considered having one made for ya- not that *you* would need to, being so pretty an ‘all, Cordy; just wondering…?” Fred eyed the other brunette with deliberately innocent brown eyes, not missing the instant flush that invaded the young woman’s cheeks. silly question! she thought, sighing, and stifling the giggle that threatened to erupt when she deigned *not* to reply.

Everyone knew Angel was in love with Cordy- and that Cordy was in love with Angel- except Angel and Cordy, that is!

True; there hadn’t really been much point in either doing anything about it, anyway …but now, that was a moot point! Trouble was, Cordy was clueless; and the vampire was so unlike a vampire it was almost funny! He only had to be in the same room with his beautiful Seer lately, and he’d trip over his own feet!

How Cordy missed his yearning, and frequently lusting glances was beyond the young Texan. Kyrumption and Moira; they were meant to be together! But she honestly couldn’t see any chance of that in this lifetime!

“I bet Angel would make a great masseur, with those large, cool hands of his- “Fred added, sighing breathily; watching her friend’s expression out of the corner of her eye as she did so.

“Maybe – how would I know?” There it was: the telltale flush deepening, and a slight catch of breath, as she unconsciously brought a hand to her mouth- then Cordy shook herself roughly *bad* girl; down!

Fred had to bite her lip to halt the giggle as she easily read the thoughts that flitted across Cordy’s face!

Then a wicked idea popped into her head, unpacked, rearranged the furniture – and stayed there.

Now where did I put that guy’s email address? she wondered absently.

Part 2

Long and bloody meandering!

He was definitely gonna tell her; any minute now…. if fact, right now…. “Awwe, fuck! Who am I kidding?”

Angel paced his room with ever increasing strides as he fought with himself. At this moment, he really wished this were as simple as merely killing twelve demons with both hands tied behind his back.

He’d never actually done so, but Angel still believed he’d have more chance of beating those almost impossible odds than:

“Cordy, I love you.” Saying those four words.

By the time they’d got back from saving the helpless over a week ago now, Cordy had already headed for home, and he just hadn’t the balls to go after her. The following day, when she arrived with her usual ‘friend-and-nothing-more’ like self, he bottled completely.

The thought of her letting him down gently- or, horror of horrors laughing hysterically from her place on the floor after he’d professed his feelings, had him zipping his gob and running for the hills.

“I have time; I have lots of time – she’d most likely have been dead and buried for over a century by that time, you pathetic wuss; but still, this needs planning.” He justified himself to himself even whilst his now-permanently bound demon covered its face in deep shame.

On reaching the foot of the stairs, he looked around, frowning heavily.

“Where’s Cordy?” he’d felt her presence even from the confines of his room, but now, thinking about it, that delicious presence was unacceptably missing.

“Fred wanted Cordelia to accompany her somewhere or other.” Wes muttered distractedly without lifting his eyes from the large book resting on his lap. Angel rolled his eyes in exasperation.

“Thank you for that detailed report, Wes. A well oiled machine as per usual” he sniped, ignoring the middle fingered salute aimed his way as he strode over to the mini fridge behind the check-in counter.

“This kind of slacking behaviour would never have happened when *I* was the boss”, he growled under his breath, pulling out a container of O’pos, pouring it in his mug, and almost throwing it in the microwave. He felt a little better when the satisfying slam of the little door caused Wes to jump and the book to slide of his lap.

Angel sniggered as he watched the man pick up the book, cursing prolifically under his breath as he attempted to find his page.

“Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?” he scolded lightly, retrieving his mug and strolling over to plant himself heavily opposite his still-cursing boss.

“I don’t kiss any one with it, so might as well add to my vocabulary instead” Wes replied mock-bitterly – well, Angel assumed he was joking. Wasn’t he?

Angel shrugged, feeling moderately glad that he, after all, wasn’t the only one whose love life sucked; glancing up in time to see the third male of the AI team enter the lobby. His eyes narrowed on the young man’s mouth.

“Is that lipstick? Something you’re not telling us, Charles?” Angel wriggled his brows, and shot a grin towards Wes, who now scrutinised his friends chops too.

“Yup; but It didn’t come out of no tube!” Gunn winked and swanked down the steps.

Angel sipped his drink, and Wes dropped his eyes back to the page in front of him.

Both sighed heavily and muttered “Jammy bastard” under their breaths.


“Can I look now, Fred?” Okay…. When Fred had asked her to go on an important errand with her this afternoon, Cordy had been surprised when directed to her own apartment. As soon as they got to her front door, the young brunette insisted she wore a blindfold before opening the door, and now she was standing in, what she assumed, was the middle of her lounge in total silence.

“Okay, you’ve been good, so- take it off, take it off!” Fred’s voice pitched high in excitement towards the end of her words.

“Angel? What are you…Oh.My.God.”? Cordy’s mouth dropped to the floor as she stared at her best friend who stood directly in front of her, wearing nothing but a pair of black silk boxers with a tiger motif emblazoned across the front; we-ellll, not exactly Angel!

“Hey, Baby, would you like a long and relaxing massage?” he purred in a sexy tone she’d never heard directed at her before.

If it hadn’t have been for the emotionless brown eyes with no real depth looking at her, Cordy would have melted into a steaming puddle on the floor.

“Do you like your present, then, Cordy?” Fred asked with a devilish twinkle in her soft brown eyes.

Part 3

Clueless is Cute??? Hah!

“She’s gone home early again? since when did we become emancipated and embrace ‘Flexitime’?” The vampire growled at his boss as he paced the lobby like a power walker.

“I take umbrage at that- who’s the boss here, anyway?” Wes defended his promotion hotly, deciding then and there to flex those ‘boss’ muscles and find something not so pleasant for the Ex boss to do; when he had a nice long think about it, of course!

“And Fred- how many times in the last few weeks has she left with her? – Do you think they are double dating?” Angel almost whispered the last bit, his expression not unlike that of a baby who’s had his lollipop snatched by an evil older sibling.

“How should I know? Being boss doesn’t require me to be psychic too!” Wes grumbled; inwardly marking up yet another ‘score’ at throwing his boss-manship in his Ex bosses face.

Well, it wasn’t as if he had anything else to crow about! He too was beginning to wonder about the goings on of both young women- especially the cute Texan who he had the major hots for. A thought popped into his pouting brain.

“Unless they’re…dating- each other?” Wes replied in grudging awe of a totally naturally perverted male specimen.

Both men paused in their tracks at that, and as one, moved over to a couch to sink down slowly whilst their minds climbed into the gutter with relative ease.

For the last three weeks, Cordy had been leaving early, almost skipping out of the door- and if that wasn’t bad enough, lately, every time Angel spoke to her she seemed to have great difficulty looking him in the eye. Angel may be a little slow on the uptake on occasion [Duh!], but he could swear that there was at least a *hint* of guilt and embarrassment in those gorgeous hazel eyes.

“I’m pushing too hard” he decided out loud, swallowing in mortification; shooting a ferocious glare at the man sitting near him who dared to snort sarcastically.

“That’s a new take on the word ‘push’, Angel! I’ve never seen it used in conjunction with stumbling and stuttering with a bit of avoiding thrown in for good measure”, Wes snarked, seemingly unbothered by the threatening flash of annoyed fang.

“Maybe I should take some lessons from you, Mister smooth!” The vampire felt a modicum of satisfaction when the man’s eyes skittered away with an accompanying guilty flush.

“Okay; so we both agree to being complete morons when it comes to the female species” Wes sighed wearily, his expression matching the vampires in glum doom-laden gloom. “Back to our brunettes; do you think they might be….you know…?”

“Getting down and dirty?” Angel finished, the awe creeping back, followed rapidly by jealousy…

“Fucking great! Now I’m trying to hold down the real urge to tear Fred limb from limb.” This was getting worse by the second. He snarled, totally pissed now!

“Shall I go out and come back in again- in a decade or ten?” The slightly trembly voice jerked both men’s heads towards the entranceway, where a young brunette hovered uncertainly.

“Fred!” Angel shot to his feet even as he mentally kicked himself in various places; Wes cleared his throat several times before rising with a weak smile.

“We-we were discussing the latest demon to hit our radar; we have yet to find out what it’s called, so we named it ‘Fred’ due to it being…” Wes’ insane rambling stuttered to a halt as he threw a ‘help-me-I’m-going-into-prat-mode’ look at his in-cahoots buddy.

“-That it’s native home is in Texas!” Angel added with not so much of the panache – but it seemed to work. Both sighed in pure relief when she bought it.

“Oh, that’s good; cos I haven’t a clue to what you could think I’ve done to deserve being limbless.” Fred grinned, hopping down the steps and making her way over to the counter.

Angel wandered over and hovered, noticing a mixture of light sweat and – body oil? Emanating from the young woman. His brow lifted in abrupt disbelief.

“Have you been to a Massage Parlour?” he asked with horror, that grew significantly when said woman flushed guiltily.

Fred had left with Cordy- which meant that HIS woman was also involved somehow!

“What? NO!! – Anyway, how do *you* know Massage Parlour smells?” Fred answered with a question; she knew it was do with her scent, as she hadn’t missed his flaring nostrils.

Oh, crap! Why did I let Cordy talk me into that- that *wonderful* experience?- Though it *had* been a little disconcerting- especially now she faced the ‘double’ of the guy. Her eyes dropped helplessly to those hands that rested on those hips.

Definitely disconcerting! Her gaze drifted towards Wes, who stood beside the outraged vampire, looking equally outraged, and the thought that she wouldn’t have found *his* hands disconcerting at all had her face flaming even more.

Angel was still trying to think of a reply to her accusation, then realised she was obviously using distraction tactics.

“That’s neither here not there- answer the question, dammit!” he growled; then growled some more when the girl who should have been quivering in her shoes, giggled.

“Angel! Look, Fred, I know it is entirely none of our business,” Wes yanked at his already loose collar, ” But those places; they are not really suitable for the likes of young women such as yourself-“

“And what kind of woman am I, Wesley?” she asked innocently, stifling a giggle at his immediate look of trapped rat. “I think you’d both better sit down before you burst, or internally combust- which is *not* a good idea for a vampire especially” Fred grinned as she sauntered past them to settle on the couch


Cordy was in seventh heaven. “Oooh, yeah…just- that’s it; harder, yessss” God was he good at this!

She forced her eyes open and looked down at the hunk of salty goodness that knelt on the rug in front of her. Her spine arched as his fingers touched a particularly sensitive spot, unable to stifle the moan that left her parted lips. This man was a *God*! – Well, not exactly *man*, but close enough.

“Would you like me to do your other foot, baby?” that purr was becoming addictive. “Or I could give you a full body massage?” he asked hopefully…. well, not hopefully- or any real emotion, but Cordy liked to imagine the ‘hope’ bit. –

What was it with those two? First Fred, and Now A!Bot! Cordy wouldn’t be surprised if the young Physicist had done a little reprogramming herself! Anyway; back to the pros and cons of having a BotBody Massage…

So far, she hadn’t been able to bring herself to agree to more than a foot massage, but weeks of being in the company of the *real* deal was slowly wearing her down. How many times could she look at those large, cool, potentially magic hands of Angel’s without wishing she could take *him* home and beg for more than her daily foot massage!

“I’m a very greedy, needy, insane woman!” Cordy groaned out loud. How many women out there would be doing cartwheels at the thought of having this totally hot AngelBot to come home to every day?

But that was the problem: robot. Plastic, unemotional…

When the real, flesh and blood version tempted you daily, it was like leaving behind prime steak Eat-In, and grabbing a burger Take Out!

Trouble was, the real deal wasn’t interested in being her bit of ‘Prime’ and it was killing her! Lately, it seemed as if he hated being in the same breathing air as her! Not like he had to share it or anything! Nope! No chance of feeling those hands on her hot and yearning little body!

Shaking off the doom and gloom that was her life, Cordy stood up abruptly and looked down at the gorgeous ‘copy’ still sitting at her feet, and made up her mind.

“Okay, you’ve talked me into it- but remember: this is a ‘professional’ massage; not some seedy Massage Parlour gig, so keep those hands inside the green zone – Got it?” A!Bot nodded expressionlessly, and rose to it’s feet to follow the brunette into her bedroom….


“WHAT??!!!” “You can’t be serious!”

Fred looked from one goldfish to another, grinning with unabashed glee.

“Ha-Have *you* too availed yourself of a rob-“

“NO!” Fred cut into Wes’ stuttered query hastily, and then turned to the severely pissed looking vampire.

“Angel, it’s just a bit of massage; nothing to have a coronary about! In fact, it’s just like having one of those foot spars- with hands included” she added with a tinkle.

Angel shot to his feet, whilst Wes sat there looking completely stunned. Fred’s idea, and eventual ‘gift’ to Angel’s Seer hadn’t gone down at all well – and she hadn’t got to the good part yet, either!

“I can’t *believe* you did this, Fred! I *can’t* believe Cordy would do this to- would do this either! This- this *robot* could develop a glitch and *kill* her! – Did you think of that? And another thing! These things develop into all kinds of things; today a foot massage, tomorrow a full blown grope with- with *things* inserted into *things* that have no business letting other *things* in – except MY *thing*” Angel huffed and blustered whilst the two spectators to his ‘losing it’ watched with varying degrees of awe, shock and humour.

“Enough with all the asterisks already!” Fred yelled, halting the vampire in mid-freak. “It’s your fault anyway,” she added, folding her arms and glaring at him accusingly.

“Me? What did *I* do?” Angel gaped. Great! Now it was *his* fault- how could it be his fault? What had *he* done to be made the scapegoat here? –

“I can hear those asterisks again!” Fred rolled her eyes in typical Cordy fashion, which increased his outrage tenfold.

“Is this because of Angel’s total inability to confront Cordelia with his smooshy, lustworthy feelings?” Piped up Wes innocently, ignoring the instant glare that shot his way.

“*That* ‘inability’ seems pretty much a common occurrence around here, doesn’t it, Wes?” He returned with a wink towards the brunette. I’m the man! he crowed silently to himself at Wesley’s expression of mortification – well, *vampire*; but still.

“We are talking about a certain Seer and her wank of a Champion right now.” Totally forgetting his manners or his language in the company of his ‘crush’- who was now looking at him with a soft, squidgy look on her face. The usually well-spoken man’s slip only made her heart melt more.

“Do you want me to tell you the rest or not?” Fred asked, relieved when they turned away from the inevitable scrap between them.

They moved away from each other and followed the two separate digits that pointed them to two separate couches. Both humphed and grunted as they sat down heavily, folding their arms tightly, and glaring at each other.

“Right: if you’d got your act together and not only opened your clueless eyes but let Cordy into the depth of your feelings for her this wouldn’t have occurred and I wouldn’t have felt so sorry for my friend that I thought of doing this little favour for her and having a ‘contact’ create an AngelBot- minus the lower attachments I might add as you obviously have a thing about *things* and stuff so, YES it is your fault that Cordy now has in her possession a robot that massages her feet every night and even though his body massages are professional and *not* seedy, she still as of yet hasn’t ‘availed’ herself of that pleasure-and boy! Is he *good* by the way, but I think I may have talked her into it today.”


“*You* ‘availed’ yourself?”

“An AngelBot??? Cordy has an *AngelBot*- a robot that looks like *me*?”

“How could you let an Angel lookalike massage you?” Wes asked indignantly.

“Let’s not talk about that right now- I’m having enough trouble getting my head round a frikken *AngelBot!*” Angel retorted, gobsmacked; striding up to tower over the Brunette intimidatingly, but she just poo-poohed him, causing a major pout to form on his lips.

“A WesBot could have easily surpassed an *AngelBot’s* massage,” Wes grumbled to himself, earning a sweet look from the woman he….!

“I’d much prefer the real thing, actually- which is the point I’ve been trying to make to *you* Angel.” She poked him in the chest with each word.

“You’d prefer a massage from me? – Um, I’m really flattered, Fred, but-“

“No, silly!” Fred rolled her eyes, beginning to wish she hadn’t had this *stupid* plan in the first place – or, at the very least, that she’d come prepared with copious quantities of duct tape! Dense. Stupid…

“I meant that *Cordy* would prefer you- the *real* you; as to me, well, that can wait till another time, with another guy.” Fred flicked a quickly reddening Wes a look and a wink, grinning slightly at the little smile of ‘enlightenment’ that bloomed on his so *cute* face. Men!

“So, big guy, whatcha gonna do about it?” she finished, pinning the very still and silent vampire with a challenging glare.

“Yo! Have I missed some action?” All eyes turned towards Gunn, who’d walked in with yet more traces of lipstick on his mouth- and face!

“Obviously not,” sniggered Wes, now completely happy with the way things were going. Lap it up, Mister Cool; *I’m* the man now!

Angel was already across the lobby and shrugging on his jacket.

“And I intend *not* to.” Angel answered the young man he passed on the way out of the hotel with a determined look on his face.

“So….wanna fill me in?” asked the dumfounded, lipstick covered Gunn…


Posted July 8, 2016 by califi in Complete